Many of my female friends and relatives will repeatedly date loser men just because they can’t think of anything better to do and are afraid of being alone for a weekend, let alone for life. For all the feminist movement has supposedly accomplished, we seem to have a society in which the majority of women will compromise their values to be with any guy, rather than to be alone. These women that I know are educated and have good jobs, but still seem to judge themelves based on who they are dating or to whom they are married. They will overlook the fact that a man may be a womanizing alcoholic with no religious beliefs whatsoever if he is good looking and has a prestigious job. The one thing these women all have in common is a lack of confidence, which often seems to be attributable to a lack of faith.
This issue strikes close to home for me because I always refused to go out with some guy just to avoid sitting home alone on Saturday night. But I was raised in a home where my parents’ marriage was much less than ideal - my father was (is) psychologically abusive and although my mother is a saint for putting up with it, I never wanted that situation for myself so I refused to date anyone for whom it was readily apparent did not share my values. I know from first-hand experience what substance abuse does to a family so I always avoided men who joke about their drinking excursions, weed smoking, etc. Also, men who are always bragging about their sexual conquests never appealed to me - life with a womanizer does not seem likely to lead to a stable environment in which to raise children. But for some reason, many women friends and relatives would often remark that I was too picky or too quick to judge, thereby belittling my willingness to observe and discern that certain conduct might indicate that a person was likely not a good choice for a life partner. The ironic thing is I eventually met a great man to whom I am now married with a family, while some of the women who used to ridicule me are still dating loser after loser (or in some cases, marrying loser after loser) and now ask me for advice.
I am so sad for her because she really wants to be married and raise a family, and yet, what does she expect when she lives with him (and sleeps with him) before marriage?