Why do you think kids are picky eaters?

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tomarin

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I’d say about 90 percent of the children I know categorically turn their nose up at food they haven’t tried and liked before. This always strikes me as strange - how will you ever learn about what could be your next favorite dish if you won’t even try something new? Will you spend the rest of your life just eating french fries and pizza?

Of course as a parent I want my own kids to eat a varied diet, so I have a vested interest here. But it also just strikes me as weird that they judge the taste of something based on its appearance. Seems to me they’re confusing two different aspects of a thing.

Is there some explanation for this behavior? Perhaps their wariness around unfamiliar food is a biologically-based survival mechanism that keeps them from eating something that will kill them? Or perhaps it is not universal at all but culturally specific and I just have the misfortune of living in a culture in which kids are picky eaters? Someday they will grow out of this, right? At what age can I expect this to happen?
 
A child’s brain is not nearly as developed as an adults brain, especially the frontal cortex. They won’t be so open-minded and be so abstract in their thinking until they mature more brain wise and from experience. Also, they are a bit spoiled, hunger does not drive them to eat something new if the parent allows the child to continue to choose a food the child knows he/she likes, they simply prefer to stay with what provides their taste buds the most pleasure, if you will. 🙂

They need more incentive to eat foods they haven’t tried or don’t seem to care for, or they simply must be compelled to do so by some means.

As they move into their teens, I think they begin to be more open to a more diverse food, but it’s not unheard of that even in college, some people, especially guys, can survive for extended periods of time on a very limited selection of food items- take ramen noodles, for example. 🍿
 
I was like that when I was a kid, but it’s hard for me to explain why. Now I’m just the opposite and I love trying new foods. I seem to recall it being a process of opening up and loosening up…🤷
 
tomarin said:
I’d say about 90 percent of the children I know categorically turn their nose up at food they haven’t tried and liked before. This always strikes me as strange - how will you ever learn about what could be your next favorite dish if you won’t even try something new? Will you spend the rest of your life just eating french fries and pizza?

Of course as a parent I want my own kids to eat a varied diet, so I have a vested interest here. But it also just strikes me as weird that they judge the taste of something based on its appearance. Seems to me they’re confusing two different aspects of a thing.

Is there some explanation for this behavior? Perhaps their wariness around unfamiliar food is a biologically-based survival mechanism that keeps them from eating something that will kill them? Or perhaps it is not universal at all but culturally specific and I just have the misfortune of living in a culture in which kids are picky eaters? Someday they will grow out of this, right? At what age can I expect this to happen?
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I think it is a safety mechanism and I welcome it in my toddlers.

It’s good to know they won’t put just anything in their mouths.

Mine tend to loosen up as they get bigger. Plus, it’s possible to engage in quid pro quo once they’re big.
 
I remember hearing years back, from a reliable source, though I cannot recall exactly where, (maybe an anthropology class?) that this is actually a survival instinct.

On the one hand, we know that infants will chew on just about anything (no disputing that), but when they’re a little older they instinctively avoid eating unknown foods (especially plants, ergo vegetables) to avoid eating something harmful.

Take it or leave it. It’s just something I heard that makes a lot of sense.

Also, remember that adults likewise tend to judge the taste of something based on its appearance. There’s a reason why restaurants are so concerned about “presentation.”

A sloppily made cheeseburger is just less appetizing than a properly made one (wish I could get the teenagers at the local fast food place to understand that one!), even though they have exactly the same ingredients.
 
What a great question.

I believe it is simply a matter of maturing… real (physical) maturing, not the kind of maturing that people associate with adapting to a social construct.
 
Interesting question! I’ve often wondered this and the “survival instinct” explanation makes a lot of sense.

Of course, it doesn’t always go away. I know certain adults who are still picky eaters.

Me, I remember being very reticent of certain things when I was young (like mayo and spicy stuff) that I now enjoy. But I don’t recall ever being given much of a choice by my parents when it comes to what to eat. It was understood that you eat what is in front of you. Though they did make exceptions for certain things, though. They never forced my brother to eat beets. I appreciated that because I liked beets and that meant there were more for me. 🙂

My kids are pretty picky. I do think my daughter is getting better now. We’ve been going with the “just try one bite” approach to new things. If she does that, it is considered a success.
 
tomarin said:
I’d say about 90 percent of the children I know categorically turn their nose up at food they haven’t tried and liked before. This always strikes me as strange - how will you ever learn about what could be your next favorite dish if you won’t even try something new? Will you spend the rest of your life just eating french fries and pizza?

Of course as a parent I want my own kids to eat a varied diet, so I have a vested interest here. But it also just strikes me as weird that they judge the taste of something based on its appearance. Seems to me they’re confusing two different aspects of a thing.

Is there some explanation for this behavior? Perhaps their wariness around unfamiliar food is a biologically-based survival mechanism that keeps them from eating something that will kill them? Or perhaps it is not universal at all but culturally specific and I just have the misfortune of living in a culture in which kids are picky eaters? Someday they will grow out of this, right? At what age can I expect this to happen?
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there is no real answer since all of us react to different foods for different reasons. Some are affected by smell, others sight or color or texture. I know for myself I can’t stand the smell of pickle juice, therefore I don’t eat pickles or want anything that would have them. Some kids are not comfortable with new things which would include food. People’s taste also changes through the years. I think I would not stress myself or my children about it. Children will eat if hungry and getting worried that if they don’t want to eat this or that, the they will end up stunted or malnourished. A food a young child rejects may be something they love later on. Don’t make a battle over food, it isn’t worth it in the long run.
 
Adults may have a higher tolerance for bitterness. In fact, some adults seek out certain bitter foods, or distinctive flavors like hot peppers. In Europe they have varieties of black licorice that are just disgusting (in my humble opinion). When I started drinking coffee as a teenager, I put sugar it; now I think sweetness ruins the flavor of coffee. I don’t know why.
 
Our kids are great and funny.

We were at a dad and daughter dance thing once and all the dad’s were asked to put down on a little white board their kids favorite kind of pizza.

Then the kids were asked to say what they liked.

Cheese
Cheese
Cheese
Cheese
… on down the line

Then my kid - ‘bacon and onion’. (and yes Dad got it right)

I think it takes a little bit of a forced hand sometimes to get kids to realize that what they are avoiding, they may like.

We have our tricks, but the key one is ‘Just take a bite and take a quick drink of milk’.

I also think it helps that I’ve been around the world a bit and eaten things I wouldn’t order, like food walking on the bar counter before being put in batter, fried and given back in whole. The kids have a close example in dad, of someone who has eaten things that sound crazy to him and to them.

Makes eating frozen veggies seem a lot easier, if you don’t like them.
 
Dacinom said:
I would like to chime in as one who was labeled a picky child and also carried the embarrassing label a picky adult eater. Being forced to try many foods as a child didn’t change my taste buds one iota. As I grew older I naturally tried new things.

While I would of course gently encourage children to try and explore new foods. I would in no way ever shame children. Not that you are planning on doing this, it’s just that this was my experience for most of my childhood and even into my adulthood if you can believe that. With my own children they did, and do have to taste something new, that is our rule.

As a grown woman even to this day I have others look at me strangely that I am “fussy” that I don’t like certain foods. Somehow people who embrace all foods carry with them sort of a pride, and I admit a bit of jealousy of them but have had to let that go. God has not graced me with the gift of those kinds of taste buds so I have to live with what I have. I assure you that I have vomited and gagged more times than I can count trying new foods!

Sorry if this is off topic. I just wanted to voice my two cents that it isn’t ALWAYS a child’s spoiled attitude that causes them to have an adverse reaction to foods, although manipulation can play a part!

I also think we live in a culture where there is so much available which puts pressure on parents. If you read in today’s parenting magazine’s they will tell you that you are a loser if your child is not eating 5 different meats, 5 different vegetables and 6 different varieties of fruits each day! I suppose I exaggerate but I think this is ridiculous. Most cultures through the history of the world did not have this kind of variety at their fingertips. I think there is a lot of pressure on parents to give their children a wide variety constantly. Let’s face it, even if your children live on peanut butter and carrot sticks for weeks they are eating better than most of the world’s population.

Bottom line: go ahead and give your children variety occasionally but I never worried if they liked or didn’t like stuff. I had children that LOVED everything and I had one child that was exactly like me. Hope this helps a little, God bless.
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You make me feel better about giving my children the same exact thing for lunch every day. 😛 :o
 
FrDavid96 said:
I remember hearing years back, from a reliable source, though I cannot recall exactly where, (maybe an anthropology class?) that this is actually a survival instinct.

On the one hand, we know that infants will chew on just about anything (no disputing that), but when they’re a little older they instinctively avoid eating unknown foods (especially plants, ergo vegetables) to avoid eating something harmful.

Take it or leave it. It’s just something I heard that makes a lot of sense.

Also, remember that adults likewise tend to judge the taste of something based on its appearance. There’s a reason why restaurants are so concerned about “presentation.”

A sloppily made cheeseburger is just less appetizing than a properly made one (wish I could get the teenagers at the local fast food place to understand that one!), even though they have exactly the same ingredients.
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Another thing that kills appetites is the sight of a portion that is too large. It helps when introducing new foods to only let the child “have” just a bit, rather than confronting them with an overwhelming portion of something new. If someone has a weak appetite, it is far better to give them small portions and then re-fill their plate. If they are nauseated, keep the aromas on the weak and the bland side.
 
This is a minority issue, but some kids have sensory issues with food.

One (expensive) trick for encouraging continued fruit and veggie eating is to keep buying baby food. (I’m buying those little pouches for my 24-month-old and some of them have stuff in them that she wouldn’t touch with a 10-ft-pole if she could actually see what she was eating.) I guess you could make cheaper baby food, but it is kind of a pain.
 
I also think that food gets treated as a highly moralistic endeavor when it’s not and some foods are unfairly stigmatized.

Take pizza, for instance. Why should we feel bad about feeding kids pizza? It’s got a starch, cheese, some meat, some veggie (at least in pureed tomato form). Separately, each of those items is totally OK, but I think a lot of us subconsciously believe that once you melt cheese it turns unhealthy (pizza, grilled cheese, mac and cheese, etc). Not so.
 
I think a lot of kids would be picky eaters, but a lot depends on the parents, in SOME of these cases, at least. I think I would have been a picky eater, but my mother put her foot down, refused to make me special food. So, I learned to like pretty much everything, as a result.

There is that about sensory issues with some kids, listed above. I think that is rare, as was stated, in cases such as autism-type disorders.
 
I know the pediatrician would say don’t worry about it. Taste is an individual thing. You may like spinach and I don’t. It’s not a rule that I have to like spinach. I don’t like liver either. I admire people who will try anything. I am not that brave. There are some foods you want to avoid because you just don’t like it. Children eat less, I think, until they are teens. 3 balanced meals with healthy snacks in between would be ideal for them. If your concern is that they won’t try a new food, it is mostly your own issue. The less an issue is made of it, the better chance they will have of trying it. That has been my experience.
 
Xantippe said:
I also think that food gets treated as a highly moralistic endeavor when it’s not and some foods are unfairly stigmatized.

Take pizza, for instance. Why should we feel bad about feeding kids pizza? It’s got a starch, cheese, some meat, some veggie (at least in pureed tomato form). Separately, each of those items is totally OK, but I think a lot of us subconsciously believe that once you melt cheese it turns unhealthy (pizza, grilled cheese, mac and cheese, etc). Not so.
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It’s certainly not the worst thing you could eat, and I have a fondness for it myself. My kids eat pizza approximately once a week and I just don’t want them eating it too much. Everything in moderation.

There are lots of things I think they would like if they only tried it - case in point being nuts, or parmesan cheese on pasta (actually one of them does like that), beets, asparagus. But I can see them looking at it on my plate and considering it and ultimately thinking “nah, that’s grown-up food.” I wonder where that comes from.

It seems like they have a different, simpler palate than I do. And I probably had the same palate when I was their age (although I remember always having loved lima beans, and brussels sprouts, two foods not only most kids don’t like, but a lot of adults as well. Liver too, in the form of liverwurst.)
 
Because parents have allowed it and taught it. We were given all foods and expected to try them. Those we did not like had to be tasted and tried for at least three or four bites. We learned to eat everything that was there.

Once it was established that there were just certain foods (liver for my brother) (peas for me)…we did not have to eat them, except when someone else served them at their home. Then we knew to take a small portion and shut our mouths about our personal dislike of the food.

It is up to adults to teach little ones good manners and eating habits. Kids do pretty much what is allowed. So shame on the parents.
 
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