Love is love, yes, but there are different kinds. One is eros, romantic love, which only truly works between two differing genders, like two puzzle pieces that can only fit into the opposite. For other men, we are meant to practice brotherly love.
Remember, love is what you do, not how you feel.
You’re not the only one who’s been attracted to the same gender. I struggled with that for a long time. One thing about it, it feels natural, like it’s a part of yourself, but it’s not. It’s not who you are, it’s not part of your identity. It’s an attack on your identity as a man.
It’s not likely to be a result of surgery.
In all likelihood, you’re seeing in James what masculine attributes you see yourself as lacking in on some level, and you want to bring that into yourself. But I’m just guessing.
God has no problem with people who are attracted to the same gender(I’m not using the words homosexual or bisexual, as that makes it seem as if it defines you). He has a problem with the actions that mock manhood and our identity as men. You haven’t heard any of what the church has to say if you believe it’s hateful.
Here is what the Church actually teaches.
2357 Homosexuality refers to relations between men or between women who experience an exclusive or predominant sexual attraction toward persons of the same sex. It has taken a great variety of forms through the centuries and in different cultures. Its psychological genesis remains largely unexplained. Basing itself on Sacred Scripture, which presents homosexual acts as acts of grave depravity,141 tradition has always declared that "homosexual acts are intrinsically disordered."142 They are contrary to the natural law. They close the sexual act to the gift of life. They do not proceed from a genuine affective and sexual complementarity. Under no circumstances can they be approved.
2358 The number of men and women who have deep-seated homosexual tendencies is not negligible. This inclination, which is objectively disordered, constitutes for most of them a trial. They must be accepted with respect, compassion, and sensitivity. Every sign of unjust discrimination in their regard should be avoided. These persons are called to fulfill God’s will in their lives and, if they are Christians, to unite to the sacrifice of the Lord’s Cross the difficulties they may encounter from their condition.
2359 Homosexual persons are called to chastity. By the virtues of self-mastery that teach them inner freedom, at times by the support of disinterested friendship, by prayer and sacramental grace, they can and should gradually and resolutely approach Christian perfection.
There’s a support group for those with SSA(same sex attraction) who pray and give advice to each other. You can’t join if still in high school, but you should read the testimonies and read about it right now.
couragerc.net/
Please look it over.