Why does someone need an annulment to enter the Church?

[Lampo]

Why is it necessary that my “wife” (our marriage is not currently recognized by the Church) get an annulment from her previous marriage in order to enter the Church?

 

[Lampo]

I’m a cradle Catholic my wife is Lutheran. She is currently going through RCIA. She is also in the process of getting an annulment. We thought she might be able to go the “lack of form” route since her ex supposedly was Catholic and they were not married in the Catholic Church nor did they get permission from the Church to not be married in the Church. No one is able to find her ex’s baptismal record though. Therefore, our priest told my wife she will need to go through the “full form” annulment. Why is the annulment necessary for her to enter into full communion with the Catholic Church? What if the annulment is not granted? She will never be able to become Catholic? What if she fully understands the teachings of the Catholic Church and understands what is meant by the teaching, “Outside the Church, there is no salvation.” ?

Couldn’t someone come right off the street, go to a Catholic priest and say that he wants to become Catholic, go through RCIA and come into full communion with the Church? Would that person be asked if he was married before, got an annulment, etc.?

 

[1ke]

Because she is currently in an invalid marriage. As you well know, there is no such thing as “remarriage.” I am not sure what led you to marry a woman outside the Church who was not canonically free to marry. But, there are consequences to that, and this is one of them.

Because you are both objectively in a state of adultery (mortal sin) neither of you can receive the sacraments. For her this includes the sacraments of initiation. She cannot be in an invalid marriage and be received into the Church.

Therefore, she must clarify her canonical freedom to marry (puruse a decree of nullity). If her marriage is declared null, she is then free to convalidate your marriage. Once that is done and you are no longer in a state of adultery, she can receive confession (if already baptized) and the sacraments of initiation and you can go to confession and resume the sacraments also.

If her marriage is found to be valid, then she will have a different set of decisions to make. She cannot enter the Chruch while married to you, until/unless her first spouse dies and you convalidate your marriage. Her other option would be to cease conjugal life with you.

 

[Seatuck]

Why is it necessary that my “wife” (our marriage is not currently recognized by the Church) get an annulment from her previous marriage in order to enter the Church?

Catholics believe that Christ taught about the permanence of marriage. He told us that to be with someone other than out spouse is adultery. Since you your “wife” attempted a marriage to someone before you there is a possiblility that she is actually married to that man in God’s eyes even though there was a civil divorce.We know that sometimes marriages aren’t contracted due to something lacking in the couple even though they may go through a ceremony. This must be investigated so that she may know how to proceed. Now we know that Adultery is a sin. Catholics know that we may not receive the Sacraments if we are in a state of sin. Since your wife is living in a sinful ie adulterous relationship at this time she would not be able to receive the Eucharist which is the sign of her communion with the Body of Christ- the Church.

Edit- since you posted while I was composing my post and cooking breakfast at the same time.

Yes, during RCIA there is a period of discernment as to such things as marriages and other issues.

Really this is for you as well as you may not receive communion at this time due to your invalid marriage. You should speak to the priest as to living as brother and sister or separating . She may be able to become Catholic if this living situation is made chaste.

 

[1ke]

I’m a cradle Catholic my wife is Lutheran. She is currently going through RCIA. She is also in the process of getting an annulment. We thought she might be able to go the “lack of form” route since her ex supposedly was Catholic and they were not married in the Catholic Church nor did they get permission from the Church to not be married in the Church. No one is able to find her ex’s baptismal record though. Therefore, our priest told my wife she will need to go through the “full form” annulment.

Yes, if it could be proven he was a Catholic and they married outside the Church then it would be a lack of form process. And, if that cannot be proven, then yes she will have to go through the tribunal for a full investigation.

Why is the annulment necessary for her to enter into full communion with the Catholic Church? What if the annulment is not granted? She will never be able to become Catholic?

See my post above.

What if she fully understands the teachings of the Catholic Church and understands what is meant by the teaching, “Outside the Church, there is no salvation.” ?

If she fully understands what this means and **really **believes it, then she will do **whatever **it takes to be fully joined to the Catholic Church. And, that may indeed mean ceasing the conjugal life with you to do so if her first marriage is valid.

Now, before you get angry at that-- realize that you created this situation by disregarding the Church when you married. You may have had what you thought were good reasons at the time, but this is the situation it created. Therefore, if you both truly believe in the Church and God’s law on marriage you will be willing to do whatever it takes.

Couldn’t someone come right off the street, go to a Catholic priest and say that he wants to become Catholic, go through RCIA and come into full communion with the Church? Would that person be asked if he was married before, got an annulment, etc.?

Yes, a person “off the street” would indeed have their marital situation investigated in the same manner prior to pursuing full communion with the Church. A person in an invalid marriage would have to have their canonical status examined and have that marriage convalidated or else cease conjugal life if found to have a prior bond.

A divorced person who had not attempted another marriage could enter the Church. They could also pursue nullity to determine their canonical status and whether they would be able to marry in the future or would need to remain single.

A never married or widowed person could enter the Church and would have no need of clarifying their marital status.

 

[Lampo]

Now, before you get angry at that-- realize that you created this situation by disregarding the Church when you married.

At the time we got married, I was very ignorant of my Catholic faith and didn’t know the teaching of the Church. I didn’t disregard it because I didn’t know about it.

 

[Lampo]

You should speak to the priest as to living as brother and sister or separating .

We would not separate. We have a four year old boy and would not put him through seeing his mommy and daddy separate. I am willing to live as brother and sister, but this raises a question in my mind. I think it is important for our son to see his mommy and daddy show affection to each other (i.e. kissing good bye, kissing when I come home from work, hugging and holding hands.) Are we committing adultery by doing that?

 

[Lampo]

What about this scenario?

Let’s say tomorrow, God forbid, my wife ends up on her deathbed and is going to die very shortly. Would a priest be able to give bring her into full communion with the Church, give her Extreme Unction and Viaticum?

 

[Seatuck]

We would not separate. We have a four year old boy and would not put him through seeing his mommy and daddy separate. I am willing to live as brother and sister, but this raises a question in my mind. I think it is important for our son to see his mommy and daddy show affection to each other (i.e. kissing good bye, kissing when I come home from work, hugging and holding hands.) Are we committing adultery by doing that?

No, I don’t imagine that would be sinning. You also would not be required to separate since you have the small child. You really want to be getting spiritual direction from your priest on this. Keep going to Mass, abstain from the Eucharist until you can be absolved in confession. Keep this situation in prayer. Ask God to give you and your wife the strength to see this through . Spend time in front of the Blessed Sacrament.

Praying for you both.

 

[Lampo]

Thank you all for your prayers in this matter.

 

[1ke]

What about this scenario?

Let’s say tomorrow, God forbid, my wife ends up on her deathbed and is going to die very shortly. Would a priest be able to give bring her into full communion with the Church, give her Extreme Unction and Viaticum?

Yes, there are provisions in canon law for situations when someone is in danger of death.

 

[1ke]

We would not separate. We have a four year old boy and would not put him through seeing his mommy and daddy separate. I am willing to live as brother and sister, but this raises a question in my mind. I think it is important for our son to see his mommy and daddy show affection to each other (i.e. kissing good bye, kissing when I come home from work, hugging and holding hands.) Are we committing adultery by doing that?

You should remain under the advisement of your priest in such a situation. Generally when young children are involved, priests will advise the couple to remain together but abstinent. But, you should be under the care of your priest for pastoral guidance on this.

Also, try not to put the cart before the horse. Certainly pursue nullity and convalidation and don’t think about the “what if” of her marriage being found valid. It will cause you a lot of stress. If and when you have to cross that bridge, God will give you strength to do the right thing.

 

[Lampo]

You should remain under the advisement of your priest in such a situation. Generally when young children are involved, priests will advise the couple to remain together but abstinent. But, you should be under the care of your priest for pastoral guidance on this.

Also, try not to put the cart before the horse. Certainly pursue nullity and convalidation and don’t think about the “what if” of her marriage being found valid. It will cause you a lot of stress. If and when you have to cross that bridge, God will give you strength to do the right thing.

I like your advice. Thanks.

 

[Lampo]

1ke…Could you point me to the sections in canon law that deal with our situation? Thanks.

 

[1ke]

1ke…Could you point me to the sections in canon law that deal with our situation? Thanks.

I’m not sure to what you are referring regarding canon law.

 

[Lampo]

I gathered from all of the responses to all of my questions that it is against canon law for someone to enter the Church that is married but still in a previously valid marriage. Here are some of the statements that lead me to believe this:

I am not sure what led you to marry a woman outside the Church who was not canonically free to marry.

Yes, there are provisions in canon law for situations when someone is in danger of death.

A person in an invalid marriage would have to have their canonical status examined and have that marriage convalidated or else cease conjugal life if found to have a prior bond.

They could also pursue nullity to determine their canonical status and whether they would be able to marry in the future or would need to remain single.

I’m not sure to what you are referring regarding canon law.

Therefore, she must clarify her canonical freedom to marry (puruse a decree of nullity).