Why 'Giving it to God' might not be Working for You

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Have you ever gone to God with a problem, placed it at His feet, and wound up continuing to battle that same problem over and over? Yeah, so have I. In this article I discuss why that might be.
“In that prayer I said two days ago, did I “give my problems to the Lord”?
No! All I gave God was a coping device, and that coping device was only superficially treating a symptom, and He knew it, and that’s where the glorious part comes in. God doesn’t want to just remove my coping device, and He doesn’t want to just heal a superficial symptom. Coping devices aren’t all bad (unless we abuse them) and symptoms aren’t bad either. In fact, those symptoms can be really helpful signals to us sometimes.
No, He wants to heal my problem. He wants me to get to the root of the issue and address it, deal with it, work through it, and then give Him my trust that He will help me through the core issue.”
 
I read your post because the title is so exactly how I feel. While I understand the concept of God wants to get to the “root” of the matter, that doesn’t really help. The example given was eating, and while that is an example that many can relate to, it is also a very simple root cause investigation. Not every issue is that simple to figure out… .at least not for me. I would hope that if I am going to God for help He would at least help me find and come to the understanding of the root of the issue… but to this point I have not had that epiphany. So to me this feels very much like when someone says “When God closes a door He opens a window.” Say what??? I can’t find that window
 
Thank you 🙂

Wonderful blog post. It is always good to root out our “selves”. What seems obvious is not always and reminds us to look deeper.
 
anytimequilter said:
I read your post because the title is so exactly how I feel. While I understand the concept of God wants to get to the “root” of the matter, that doesn’t really help. The example given was eating, and while that is an example that many can relate to, it is also a very simple root cause investigation. Not every issue is that simple to figure out… .at least not for me. I would hope that if I am going to God for help He would at least help me find and come to the understanding of the root of the issue… but to this point I have not had that epiphany. So to me this feels very much like when someone says “When God closes a door He opens a window.” Say what??? I can’t find that window
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Hey anytimequilter, the key (or at least the key that helped me the most) is going to your interior with God. What I mean by that is meditating on Christ, in His presence (in front of the Tabernacle, or at Adoration if possible) and bring it to God there, and then spend some quality time listening.

You are absolutely right that many (I would say most) issues are not that easy to root out. In fact, I would say that most people in our modern society of constant distraction probably need professional counseling (as I mention in the article). I’ve had counseling myself, and it was EXTREMELY helpful. Not that it’s necessary, per se, but that in our era it is so difficult to otherwise remove ourselves from distractions long enough to think.

Anyway, that’s why it’s important to begin asking yourself questions (as you quietly reflect), seek spiritual direction from a Priest/Confessor, and do all of this in Christ’s presence (at least spiritually…where you consciously let God know that you are putting yourself in His presence, wherever you might be).

The retreat that I mention at the end of the article is one based on the Spiritual Exercises of Ignatius of Loyola. If you can find any such retreat in your area, I highly recommend it. They walk you, step-by-step, through getting to the heart of things as you grow closer to Christ.
 
China123 said:
Thank you 🙂

Wonderful blog post. It is always good to root out our “selves”. What seems obvious is not always and reminds us to look deeper.
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Amen! That’s what I discovered finally. I always knew that basics of how we are supposed to become selfless and grow in holiness, etc…but I never grasped how to do it (not fully anyway). I feel like, after that Ignatian retreat, I have seen a depth like I have never even dreamed of. 🙂
 
Hey anytimequilter, the key (or at least the key that helped me the most) is going to your interior with God. What I mean by that is meditating on Christ, in His presence (in front of the Tabernacle, or at Adoration if possible) and bring it to God there, and then spend some quality time listening.
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Code: 
 I understand this concept, and I do try.
I am getting to the point that I feel like I must be doing something wrong. I mean can you pray wrong?

Its not as simple as that for me…I have been going to an adoration chapel… for more than 7 years I have been going. I try to go at least once a week and there have been stretches that I have gone two times a week. Its like there is some basic lesson that I never learned… and no matter how much I try I can’t learn it.

As far as spending quality time listening… how do you know that its God or if its your own desires that you are listening to?
Spiritual Exercises of Ignatius of Loyola. If you can find any such retreat in your area, I highly recommend it. They walk you, step-by-step, through getting to the heart of things as you grow closer to Christ.
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I have been to retreats, but I don’t recall seeing anything like this advertised.
 
anytimequilter said:
I understand this concept, and I do try.

I am getting to the point that I feel like I must be doing something wrong. I mean can you pray wrong?

Its not as simple as that for me…I have been going to an adoration chapel… for more than 7 years I have been going. I try to go at least once a week and there have been stretches that I have gone two times a week. Its like there is some basic lesson that I never learned… and no matter how much I try I can’t learn it.

As far as spending quality time listening… how do you know that its God or if its your own desires that you are listening to?

I have been to retreats, but I don’t recall seeing anything like this advertised.
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There are different types of prayer, but I don’t think there is a wrong way to do it. One thing to also keep in mind is that God does give us crosses to bear, and sometimes He allows us to suffer under that weight for some greater good that we may never know until we finally meet Him. (I know that’s not very comforting…sorry. 😊 )

Aside from recommending counseling, I can’t say much to help you. But, I can tell you that I also have been on MANY retreat before (even staffed SEVERAL) and I have never been on one like this. It’s a silent retreat…so it forces you to the interior life. I’m not saying it will finally open up the sky for you…but I do highly recommend it. I posted some links at the end of the article, but you might be able to ask your local Priest about them, and he should know where to direct you (hopefully).

You can also contact the Miles Christi group and they can help you. That is the order that put on the retreat that I attended.

mileschristi.org/activities/
mileschristi.org/contact/

The contact info is not just for those who live is those states…that’s where they are headquartered in the US.
 
+JMJ+

Great article ahs! Here is a tool that may help others find their own root sin:

christianperfection.info/examination.htm

The key here is to look at the “fruits” of the root sin (the rightmost box) and tally with what is happening in your life. The “fruits”, in other words, you use as “symptoms” to determine the more subtle root sin that you have. You then look for ways to battle that root sin, with which I find St. Thomas Aquinas’ Summa Theologica to be most helpful. You then use the list of symptoms as part of your daily examination of conscience.

I’ll use my own life as an example. I have had problems with masturbation and looking at the the internet for porn, so I had always thought that lust was my root sin. And yet for years I could not stop it, no matter how I try.

I then found the chart that I presented above, and then tallying the “symptoms” I found out, to my surprise, that it was “acedia (sloth)” that was my root sin rather than lust. What convinced me was that I was more guilty of “pusillanimity, discouragement, spiritual torpor” than of “impetuosity (of decision), inconstancy”, in that I more consistently delay decisions and need reassurance before making them than make rash ones, and that I can be really mean to others especially if they have hurt me or they intrude my time (“malice, rancor”). Finally, my lust for porn can be seen as “seeking after forbidden things”, especially since it is harder to stop it for me when it is very late at night and I have work in the morning.

I then looked up “Sloth” in St. Thomas Aquinas’ Summa Theologica (here is the link on the pertinent artiicle), and I find that “Sloth … is an oppressive sorrow, which, to wit, so weighs upon man’s mind, that he wants to do nothing…denotes sorrow for spiritual good.” Therefore, it is fought by (1) standing one’s ground: “Experience shows that the onslaught of sloth is not to be evaded by flight but to be conquered by resistance”; (2) prayer (especially meditation and contemplation) and the sacraments: “sloth arises from the fact that we sigh at being deprived of spiritual fruit,” and “the more we think about spiritual goods, the more pleasing they become to us, and forthwith sloth dies away”; (3) not being negative on myself and others, especially on my and others’ good qualities: “if a man contemns the good things he has received from God, this, far from being a proof of humility, shows him to be ungrateful: and from such like contempt results sloth, because we sorrow for things that we reckon evil and worthless”.

These things that I read really opened my eyes because I never thought that the other faults I had been doing, seemingly so innocent, were in fact contributing to my lust and other problems.
 
nuntym - Thank you for your (name removed by moderator)ut and the table to review. I am going to give this some thought and prayer, as I do believe that there is a root cause (or root sin) in my situation, but I can honestly say that nothing is standing out right now.

I also know that reading St Thomas Aquinas has helped me understand other things and resolve them, so this does peak my interest.

While I realize I could pray much more than I do and give God much more than I do, and I am sure that make mistakes all of the time. BUT since I am so painfully aware of my mistakes …I often wonder if somehow my issue is rooted in something I do NOT do…whether it be a lack of faith or fear holding me back… I have no idea. But it always helps just to air the thoughts
 
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