Why is it only girls?

[ceciliatherese]

Why in the abortion debate, and on this forum, is the blame almost always centered around the girls and women involved in promiscuity? Why’s it always "she shouldn’t be sleeping around with everyone then not accept the baby as a consequence of her actions’? I mean, why, when guys are promiscuous, they’re called ‘players’, and then when girls are, they’re called sluts? Most of this is terribly one-sided, and I don’t blame many of the people who are pro-choice when they say a lot of pro-lifers are anti-woman.

 

[Drawmack]

Why in the abortion debate, and on this forum, is the blame almost always centered around the girls and women involved in promiscuity? Why’s it always "she shouldn’t be sleeping around with everyone then not accept the baby as a consequence of her actions’? I mean, why, when guys are promiscuous, they’re called ‘players’, and then when girls are, they’re called sluts? Most of this is terribly one-sided, and I don’t blame many of the people who are pro-choice when they say a lot of pro-lifers are anti-woman.

I think it’s because, according to current U.S. laws, the woman, unilaterally, decides to get an abortion. The man cannot stop or compel the abortion. So, while the man is as guilty as the woman in creating the life the decision to keep the baby is only the woman’s.

BTW: I don’t agree with this, I’m simply posting my assumptions about why it is.

 

[kimbaichan]

Why in the abortion debate, and on this forum, is the blame almost always centered around the girls and women involved in promiscuity? Why’s it always "she shouldn’t be sleeping around with everyone then not accept the baby as a consequence of her actions’?

Because only girls and women are capable of getting pregnant.

 

[RobbyS]

I think it’s because, according to current U.S. laws, the woman, unilaterally, decides to get an abortion. The man cannot stop or compel the abortion. So, while the man is as guilty as the woman in creating the life the decision to keep the baby is only the woman’s.

BTW: I don’t agree with this, I’m simply posting my assumptions about why it is.

I think many people agree that men are a prime beneficiary of Roe v. Wade. before if a guy got a girl pregnant, he was under a lot of pressure to marry her, to spare her the shame of bearing an illegitimate child. Of course, before and after, guys put a lot of pressure ongirls to “get rid of” the unwanted child. Parents are often worse. No one wants their child punished by a baby (more or less quote/end quote).

 

[JimG]

I think many people agree that men are a prime beneficiary of Roe v. Wade. before if a guy got a girl pregnant, he was under a lot of pressure to marry her, to spare her the shame of bearing an illegitimate child. Of course, before and after, guys put a lot of pressure ongirls to “get rid of” the unwanted child. Parents are often worse. No one wants their child punished by a baby (more or less quote/end quote).

Yes, the legalization of abortion was a great victory for men’s liberation. It transferred all responsibility to women.

 

[rpp]

Why in the abortion debate, and on this forum, is the blame almost always centered around the girls and women involved in promiscuity? Why’s it always "she shouldn’t be sleeping around with everyone then not accept the baby as a consequence of her actions’? I mean, why, when guys are promiscuous, they’re called ‘players’, and then when girls are, they’re called sluts? Most of this is terribly one-sided, and I don’t blame many of the people who are pro-choice when they say a lot of pro-lifers are anti-woman.

Can you point out where people here say that?

Abortion makes the sexual exploitation of women so much easier. The Pro-life position is inherently pro-woman whole the pro-abortion position is inherently biased against women. It is, after men, who pushed to make abortion legal.

 

[Prodigal_Son]

As a teacher, whenever I talk about the issue, I lay into the boys who will do whatever they feel like, and let the girl face the consequences. I think our society has a terrible habit of placing all responsibilities on the girls, which is part of the reason that guys are often such bums.

Until we teach our boys to be honorable, we will have a major problem on our hands, even if abortion were suddenly curtailed.

 

[Sarah_Angel]

Why in the abortion debate, and on this forum, is the blame almost always centered around the girls and women involved in promiscuity? Why’s it always "she shouldn’t be sleeping around with everyone then not accept the baby as a consequence of her actions’? I mean, why, when guys are promiscuous, they’re called ‘players’, and then when girls are, they’re called sluts? Most of this is terribly one-sided, and I don’t blame many of the people who are pro-choice when they say a lot of pro-lifers are anti-woman.

Usually when I make that sort of claim, it’s to refute the claim that the woman has a choice in what she does with her body. The pro-choicer put the woman in the spotlight before I did. I try to be more sensitive about it though because I know that most girls who have premarital sex aren’t “sluts.”

I am fully aware of the fact that boyfriends and parents pressure girls into getting abortions, and that boys pressure girls into having sex with them. What others have to understand is that it’s society as a whole (however you want to interpret that) that puts those “player” and “slut” titles on people. It wasn’t pro-lifers who invented those terms and we as Christians must recognize how wrong it is to categorize people in such a way.

 

[ahollars]

Usually when I make that sort of claim, it’s to refute the claim that the woman has a choice in what she does with her body. The pro-choicer put the woman in the spotlight before I did. I try to be more sensitive about it though because I know that most girls who have premarital sex aren’t “sluts.”

I am fully aware of the fact that boyfriends and parents pressure girls into getting abortions, and that boys pressure girls into having sex with them. What others have to understand is that it’s society as a whole (however you want to interpret that) that puts those “player” and “slut” titles on people. It wasn’t pro-lifers who invented those terms and we as Christians must recognize how wrong it is to categorize people in such a way.

I think this is one of the threads that the OP is referring to…

No Hope for Single Mothers in Catholic/Christian faith.

 

[manualman]

Can you provide an example where someone (not a troll) on this forum called a promiscuous guy a “player” or other nudge, nudge - wink, wink tacit approval for male promiscuity? It surely is present in our larger overall culture, but that surely isn’t catholicism’s fault! You may have noticed, we have rather a large number of issues with the larger overall culture, of which this is one.

Last I looked, catholic teaching was the same on promiscuity for both men and women.

 

[rpp]

Can you provide an example where someone (not a troll) on this forum called a promiscuous guy a “player” or other nudge, nudge - wink, wink tacit approval for male promiscuity? It surely is present in our larger overall culture, but that surely isn’t catholicism’s fault! You may have noticed, we have rather a large number of issues with the larger overall culture, of which this is one.

Last I looked, catholic teaching was the same on promiscuity for both men and women.

 

[puzzleannie]

Why in the abortion debate, and on this forum, is the blame almost always centered around the girls and women involved in promiscuity? Why’s it always "she shouldn’t be sleeping around with everyone then not accept the baby as a consequence of her actions’? I mean, why, when guys are promiscuous, they’re called ‘players’, and then when girls are, they’re called sluts? Most of this is terribly one-sided, and I don’t blame many of the people who are pro-choice when they say a lot of pro-lifers are anti-woman.

not every woman who has an unplanned pregnancy and is presented with abortion as “choice” to “solve” her dilemma got that way because of promiscuity. Some were raped, some became pregnant in a monagamous relationship, or even in marriage. Legally at least in this country the father has no say-so in the woman’s “choice” for or against abortion, so how you describe the father is irrelevant. For that matter, epithets against the mother do nothing to address the real issues at stake, either.

 

[incense]

Why in the abortion debate, and on this forum, is the blame almost always centered around the girls and women involved in promiscuity? Why’s it always "she shouldn’t be sleeping around with everyone then not accept the baby as a consequence of her actions’? I mean, why, when guys are promiscuous, they’re called ‘players’, and then when girls are, they’re called sluts? Most of this is terribly one-sided, and I don’t blame many of the people who are pro-choice when they say a lot of pro-lifers are anti-woman.

If the blame was put on the woman, wouldn’t pro-lifers be picketing women instead of policticians and abortion facilities? I’ve not heard of anyone yelling “slut” at the poor women walking into a clinic. So how did you ever get such an idea?

You seem rather old-fashioned in your ideas about sex labels. Sadly, it’s completely acceptable in our culture for both sexes to sleep around today. Who in the world still calls girls “sluts” and guys “players”? Grandma? (In our Catholic culture, it’s completely unacceptable for either to sleep around.)

 

[Georgia]

I would hope there are no men who would call the women those names. The men bear equal responsibility in these issues.

Over the course of my life, I have heard men complain that women would not get an abortion and that trapped them into paying child support. That is, I suppose, what Roe v. Wade got us, a society in which it is acceptable to blame someone for allowing a baby to live.

Men were set on a course of not supporting their offspring with Roe and with the programs that supplanted fathers with welfare checks. Society has been weakened and morals have been made the stuff of an earlier era.

 

[didymus]

I would hope there are no men who would call the women those names. The men bear equal responsibility in these issues.

Over the course of my life, I have heard men complain that women would not get an abortion and that trapped them into paying child support. That is, I suppose, what Roe v. Wade got us, a society in which it is acceptable to blame someone for allowing a baby to live.

Men were set on a course of not supporting their offspring with Roe and with the programs that supplanted fathers with welfare checks. Society has been weakened and morals have been made the stuff of an earlier era.

Well, there are men who offer to “do the right thing” and are devastated as well as those who pressure their girlfriend/wife to get an abortion. We have no way of knowing what the percentages are, but you might be surprised.

Guys are instinctively geared to want to “carry on their line”. Just check out any delivery room with proud fathers going, “look what I made” while the mother lays exhausted from hours of labor.
But a lot of women are scared by the offer to “do the right thing”. His promise of child support may turn into having him to court to actually pay it. Visitation means having him involved in her life well after she has tried to “move on”.

And, of course, two generation since Roe have told both of them that they can just erase their “mistake”. How can we get people to go again the culture they’ve been raised in when it offers a simple solution?

Sorry to ramble. I’ve known people who have been in these situations including a woman who married the father who turned out to be abusive, and a father who got depressed every year thinking about how old his child would be.

 

[johngh]

Well of course men should be held accountable for how they treat women and for their sexual promiscuity, but ultimately the decision of murdering an unborn child lies with the woman and her only. And murder is a much bigger sin than promiscuity.