Why not adultery?

  • Thread starter Thread starter Eruvande
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
E

Eruvande

Guest
I understand the Catholic teaching on the indissoluble nature of marriage, and agree with it, but I’m confused on one point - Jesus teaches that divorce is unacceptable, except for adultery. But the church doesn’t allow divorce for adultery as far as I’m aware. Why the discrepancy?
 
Eruvande said:
I understand the Catholic teaching on the indissoluble nature of marriage, and agree with it, but I’m confused on one point - Jesus teaches that divorce is unacceptable, except for adultery. But the church doesn’t allow divorce for adultery as far as I’m aware. Why the discrepancy?
Click to expand...
According to “Does Jesus leave a loophole for divorce in Matthew 19:9?”:

The word used here is porneia–not moicheia, or “the ordinary Greek word for adultery.”
What is being said is that if a man and a woman are in fact married, the bond is inseparable. But if they are not married, just “living together,” then there is no lawful marriage and there can be a separation or annulment. The wording of the New American Bible for Matthew 19:9 is a translation that gives us this sense.
Click to expand...
That version has the clause “(unless the marriage is unlawful).”
 
Thank you, that makes sense.

Although I do feel really bad for my friends whose husbands have left them and, according to catholic teaching, condemned them to a single life forever. But that’s another topic.
 
It’s actually sacramental marriages that are indissoluble; i.e., marriages between spouses that are both validly baptized. Non-sacramental marriages may be dissolved under certain circumstances.
 
TheWarriorMonk said:
It’s actually sacramental marriages that are indissoluble; i.e., marriages between spouses that are both validly baptized. Non-sacramental marriages may be dissolved under certain circumstances.
Click to expand...
To be precise, a sacramental marriage is between validly baptized spouses (and when one or both of the parties is Catholic according to the forms prescribed by the Church when not dispensed) who subsequently consummate the marriage in a manner consistent with Church teaching. The Church has a rebuttable presumption, where the spouses lived together, that the marriage was in fact consummated.
 
Eruvande said:
Thank you, that makes sense.

Although I do feel really bad for my friends whose husbands have left them and, according to catholic teaching, condemned them to a single life forever. But that’s another topic.
Click to expand...
My wife left me. Do not feel sorry. This is the path God has chosen or at least allowed to happen. If we truly trust in Him, and His Word, then He will make all things right!

It is not easy, but it is His will, and we must accept it!

I do feel for people who after divorce and remarriage have returned to the Church and cannot take Communion. I can take Communion and would not trade places with them for the world. However, I can imagine how I would be hurting if I were in that situation.

There is a solution for that situation however, That person can confess his second marriage as adultery with the intent to live his current state chastely. And I believe God would have great mercy on those who do that but perhaps on occasion fall into adultery with their current legal spouse. But at least their intent is to try with Gods grace to live out the situation as pleasing to God as possible and be able to receive the mos important grace, the Eucharist.

I would also suggest they discern the validity of their first marriage through the annulment process. Perhaps, their first marriage was not actually valid to begin with and the second legal marriage really is Gods will. But, it all starts with the desire to do Gods will and submit to Him.

I believe this is what the Church has in mind for the spiritual and pastoral care for those of us in this situation.

God bless in your journey!
 
Eruvande said:
I understand the Catholic teaching on the indissoluble nature of marriage, and agree with it, but I’m confused on one point - Jesus teaches that divorce is unacceptable, except for adultery. But the church doesn’t allow divorce for adultery as far as I’m aware. Why the discrepancy?
Click to expand...
When did Jesus say that adultery dissolved a marriage?
 
=Eruvande;11846423]I understand the Catholic teaching on the indissoluble nature of marriage, and agree with it, but I’m confused on one point - Jesus teaches that divorce is unacceptable, except for adultery. But the church doesn’t allow divorce for adultery as far as I’m aware. Why the discrepancy?
Click to expand...
That is only partially true my friend.

The Church encourages forgiveness and staying together

A Divorce is PERMITTED .BUT neither party can enter into a second marriage that is both Valid and Licit.

I certainly do NOT make liite of infidelity in marriage. It’s a HOME - WRECKER. BUT did not Christ tell Peter that He WAS to forgive an unlimited number of times. Mt 18:22-23. Again I don;t suggest that repeated abuses be condoned or overlooked, BUT that forgiveness ought to be the first step in maintaining a marriage. It’s the KIDS who lose out in divorce.

There are NO winners in a divorce; ONLY LOSERS :o

Pray much,
God Bless you,
Patrick
 
robertkchacon said:
My wife left me. Do not feel sorry. This is the path God has chosen or at least allowed to happen. If we truly trust in Him, and His Word, then He will make all things right!

It is not easy, but it is His will, and we must accept it!

I do feel for people who after divorce and remarriage have returned to the Church and cannot take Communion. I can take Communion and would not trade places with them for the world. However, I can imagine how I would be hurting if I were in that situation.

There is a solution for that situation however, That person can confess his second marriage as adultery with the intent to live his current state chastely. And I believe God would have great mercy on those who do that but perhaps on occasion fall into adultery with their current legal spouse. But at least their intent is to try with Gods grace to live out the situation as pleasing to God as possible and be able to receive the mos important grace, the Eucharist.

I would also suggest they discern the validity of their first marriage through the annulment process. Perhaps, their first marriage was not actually valid to begin with and the second legal marriage really is Gods will. But, it all starts with the desire to do Gods will and submit to Him.

I believe this is what the Church has in mind for the spiritual and pastoral care for those of us in this situation.

God bless in your journey!
Click to expand...
bless you for your faithfulness - I pray that you are truly blessed in it!
 
Eruvande said:
My protestant understanding has always been Matthew 19:9, but I now see that’s not the case.
Click to expand...
In fairness, the word Porneia can mean adultery, but it more broadly means “sexual perversion.” The Matthew account of Jesus’ teaching on the permanence of marriage is the ONLY gospel that includes this clause.

Catholic scholars have long surmised that the reason for this apparent discrepancy in the different gospel accounts is that Matthew’s is the most complete version, but that the other gospels still captured, in the opinions of their authors, the critical meaning of what Jesus was saying. Consider the situation. You CAN’T write a complete word for word account of everything Jesus ever said, even if you were there. By necessity, accounts are summaries of the critical points.

If Jesus really did mean to provide an exception for adultery, then Mark and Luke (IIRC) really screwed up by failing to report that teaching. But if Jesus merely made an aside to point out that he wasn’t referring to “divorces” of marriages that were inherently perverse (incest or polygamy), then it is comprehensible why the other two left off the special case detail. They were trying to make sure the overall teaching was clear, not address what might seem to be contradictions.
 
This passage is the root of the catholic idea that sometimes what appear to be marriages, aren’t. Marriage requires that the couple truly consent and that there not be any moral impediments to the two marrying. It ain’t the white dress and the vows that make a marriage, it’s the blessing of God. God doesn’t grant that when there is a genuine impediment. On this basis, the catholic church allows divorced people to petition for an investigation into the marriage to see if it ever really was a marriage or if such an impediment actually prevented the contraction of a valid marriage. If so, a declaration of nullity (sometimes called an annulment) can be granted. It’s not a catholic divorce, it is a finding that the marriage never really was.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top