Why should one attend or abstain from Mass? When should one receive or refrain from the Eucharist?

[EasterJoy]

OP, I don’t want to minimize your suffering. You have asked that God remove your trial, but that has not been God’s will. That was the experience of Our Lord at His Passion. He, too, brought the words of the psalmist to mind–My God, My God, Why Have You Forsaken Me? You will find that in addition to psalms that praise God, there are also psalms that challenge God about the difficulties the psalmist is going through. The Book of Job is all about that.

I do not know why you have not been given the sensible consolations you have asked for. There was nothing wrong in asking for them, but I know that sometimes this prayer is not answered. It has nothing to do with how pleasing to God you are. As C.S. Lewis points out, it is sometimes those who are the most spiritually advanced who have reported the longest and most difficult trials. St. Teresa of Avila was very blunt about this one day: Dear Lord, if this is how You treat Your friends, it is no wonder You have so few! This is the same saint who also said, “Let nothing trouble you, let nothing frighten you. All things are passing; God never changes. Patience obtains all things. He who possesses God lacks nothing: God alone suffices.” Undulation…we all go through it.

In addition to asking for an end to your trials, ask God for a Simon of Cyrene–someone who will help you in your trials and help you to bear the load of them. I hope you do find something or someone to help you.

 

[CJsmommy]

Look up Bl. Elizabeth of the Trinity. She was a nun who died young of Addison’s Disease. She let her suffering be for God. Maybe pray for graces to know why you are suffering? God might want you to get something out of it that you haven’t gotten yet. Just a thought.

 

[ethereality]

Maybe pray for graces to know why you are suffering

I’ve already prayed for that, repeatedly, and again, no clear answer. Jimmy Akin’s advice recently was rather the contrary, “Don’t worry about trying to understand why.”

Well, I say “no answer,” but one conclusion I’ve come to – dunno if it’s from God or not – is that I still need to grow in virtue. One could also argue that God refused me a clear answer because of pride, that I should be more humble and accept absolutely anything. (“God isn’t a being you can expect something from.”) But I cannot pretend I haven’t been hurt by God’s silence. Nothing hurts the plausibility of the Church like the apparent absence of God, which I experience when I pray or go to church: So it seems better not to pray or go to church, but the Church says it’s better to do so. So I appear to be in an absurd situation.

I suppose I will let my acceptance of suffering be its own prayer, together with asking God to help. My next question is whether it’s wrong to pray to die …