Why this lifestyle?

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Cassandra_Lyn

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It seems to me an extremely rigid lifestyle with tons of rules that dictate to people how they are supposed to behave and live their lives. As a recovering addict, I tend to gravitate towards very rigid, very all or nothing, ways of looking at things, so when I became a Christian last fall, Catholicism was the immediate draw, because it was all “this is the way, this is the only way, everything else is wrong, you have to do this, this, that, that and this, and do it all the right way, and if you don’t, you’re damned to hell.”

Explain to me why I shouldn’t see it that way? It’s not a challenge, I’m not taking an aggressive standpoint here, I am genuinely curious how people view Catholicism if not rigid and oppressive, and why they don’t view it that way.
 
Oh, this is more directed to adult converts than Cradle Catholics, btw.
 
Cassandra_Lyn said:
It seems to me an extremely rigid lifestyle with tons of rules that dictate to people how they are supposed to behave and live their lives. As a recovering addict, I tend to gravitate towards very rigid, very all or nothing, ways of looking at things, so when I became a Christian last fall, Catholicism was the immediate draw, because it was all “this is the way, this is the only way, everything else is wrong, you have to do this, this, that, that and this, and do it all the right way, and if you don’t, you’re damned to hell.”

Explain to me why I shouldn’t see it that way? It’s not a challenge, I’m not taking an aggressive standpoint here, I am genuinely curious how people view Catholicism if not rigid and oppressive, and why they don’t view it that way.
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Well you can see it that way and it can keep you from sin, but ideally you want to know why your doing these things. Of course everything you do should be for the love of God, but there are explanations, for instance on why we are to fast on Ash Wednesday and Good Friday.

When we don’t understand why we are still to keep our faith in the Church and obey because we love God and trust him.
 
Catholicism is the path to freedom, it’s not rigid.
Your premise is way off.
Get a copy of the Catechism and learn about the faith.
It’s not about “thou shalt not” but DO THIS…As Christ did.
 
Although I am a cradle Catholic, I have asked this question as well.
On the surface, there seems to be only rules, rules, and more rules!
“Thou shalt not…”, “Thou shalt not…” and etc. It can be quite intimidating. :eek:

But let’s see it this way:
You just bought a new oven that you’ve never had before, and you’re ready to set it up and look at the handbook with it. In it, there are all these warnings - everywhere!
What would you do? Listen to the warnings or don’t listen?
The people who made the handbook didn’t make it so that they wanted to be rigid with your use of the brand new oven, they wanted to help you so that you know how to handle it and safely. They want to keep you from hurting yourself. Would you disregard the warnings and decide to do it your own way with the risk, or would you follow what they say?

God is like that as well. These rules are not a list of "do not"s, they are to assist us in our daily lives so that we may go to Heaven! 😃
 
Well freewill is a good thing, but by itself can lead to very bad places, where we can become less and less free, as in the case of addiction. Discipline(as in being a disciple) can lead to a much greater freedom depending on the master or teacher as we learn to follow their will, think of learning the piano or learning maths for instance. So we can say who has the greatest free will? Well there no will freer than God’s will, so follow his teaching and discipline that he has passed on to the church because in the end he can give us the greatest freedom, and God being good Himself has made the end good for those who follow His will. The easy part is talking about it.
 
Cassandra_Lyn said:
It seems to me an extremely rigid lifestyle with tons of rules that dictate to people how they are supposed to behave and live their lives. As a recovering addict, I tend to gravitate towards very rigid, very all or nothing, ways of looking at things, so when I became a Christian last fall, Catholicism was the immediate draw, because it was all “this is the way, this is the only way, everything else is wrong, you have to do this, this, that, that and this, and do it all the right way, and if you don’t, you’re damned to hell.”

Explain to me why I shouldn’t see it that way? It’s not a challenge, I’m not taking an aggressive standpoint here, I am genuinely curious how people view Catholicism if not rigid and oppressive, and why they don’t view it that way.
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I am an adult convert. I completely understand having an all or nothing attitude about things. I have had and continue to have struggles myself due to this way of thinking.

How many rules are just right? And, who decides the rules?

When you start saying the Catholic Church is too rigid or has too many rules then I ask as compared to what standard. The honest answer always is, to my own. The thing is the Catholic Faith is a revealed religion. A central fact is that it proclaims to be what God revealed to us. It either is or is not. But if it is then the rules aren’t made up by some man or group of men but by God. That being so our opinion or subjective preference of the quantity and quality of the rules really doesn’t matter.

If you really want to see tons of rules go read the all the laws, and administrative rules, of the US government. Then read the same for the state you live in. If you have a job with a large corporation go read all the rules of your employer. If you are in school read all their rules. My point is there are lots of rules everywhere. The Catholic Church has relatively few compared to most other organizations people interact with or are subject to. And yet people complain about the rules. Why? The simple answer is because we like to do what the rules prohibit. We like to not do what the rules demand.

Consider the words of Jesus:
41 Then he will say to those at his left hand, ‘You that are accursed, depart from me into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels; 42 for I was hungry and you gave me no food, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, 43 I was a stranger and you did not welcome me, naked and you did not give me clothing, sick and in prison and you did not visit me.’ 44 Then they also will answer, ‘Lord, when was it that we saw you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or sick or in prison, and did not take care of you?’ 45 Then he will answer them, ‘Truly I tell you, just as you did not do it to one of the least of these, you did not do it to me.’ 46 And these will go away into eternal punishment, but the righteous into eternal life.”
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If one is a Christian I don’t see how they can get from this passage that rules aren’t important and that Jesus doesn’t think not following rules will send you to Hell. The rule here is part of the Great Commandment to love the Lord thy God. This is the second part to love thy neighbor as thyself. All the commandments and rules are simply specific examples or applications of this rule. The whole point of the Catholic Faith is to love God and love your neighbor. That is what all the rules point us towards.
 
I’m a cradle catholic and I do feel the same way

I’m still a Catholic because despite all of that, I believe it’s Truth. it has made me so unhappy to the point I would physically hurt myself and then wonder if I’m damned. Lol. But I still stick around. I’m probably the reason why anti religion advocates hates religion, haha.

Bc why leave truth. Heaven all the way to hell, hell all the way to heaven is somewhat what i live by.

It has its good moments though.
 
It can be a lonely journey. I feel called to stick with it as like Lea I see it as the truth but I sometimes feel like a toddler dragging my feet and saying “but I don’t wanna!”.
 
Camillus14 said:
Although I am a cradle Catholic, I have asked this question as well.
On the surface, there seems to be only rules, rules, and more rules!
“Thou shalt not…”, “Thou shalt not…” and etc. It can be quite intimidating. :eek:

But let’s see it this way:
You just bought a new oven that you’ve never had before, and you’re ready to set it up and look at the handbook with it. In it, there are all these warnings - everywhere!
What would you do? Listen to the warnings or don’t listen?
The people who made the handbook didn’t make it so that they wanted to be rigid with your use of the brand new oven, they wanted to help you so that you know how to handle it and safely. They want to keep you from hurting yourself. Would you disregard the warnings and decide to do it your own way with the risk, or would you follow what they say?

God is like that as well. These rules are not a list of "do not"s, they are to assist us in our daily lives so that we may go to Heaven! 😃
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You’re comparing human beings with appliances? We aren’t machines.
 
Lea101 said:
I’m a cradle catholic and I do feel the same way

I’m still a Catholic because despite all of that, I believe it’s Truth. it has made me so unhappy to the point I would physically hurt myself and then wonder if I’m damned. Lol. But I still stick around. I’m probably the reason why anti religion advocates hates religion, haha.

Bc why leave truth. Heaven all the way to hell, hell all the way to heaven is somewhat what i live by.

It has its good moments though.
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Your heart is telling you it’s not right for you if it is driving you to hurt yourself. It’s not funny at all, why would you LoL at that???
 
I want to apologize if I have offended anyone. I was banned from my recovery support forum for saying something that an admin interpreted as disrespectful, and I have unfortunately lost one of the few things that’s been sustaining me, so the last thing I want to do now is step on any toes here and have the same thing happen.
 
Cassandra_Lyn said:
It seems to me an extremely rigid lifestyle with tons of rules that dictate to people how they are supposed to behave and live their lives. As a recovering addict, I tend to gravitate towards very rigid, very all or nothing, ways of looking at things, so when I became a Christian last fall, Catholicism was the immediate draw, because it was all “this is the way, this is the only way, everything else is wrong, you have to do this, this, that, that and this, and do it all the right way, and if you don’t, you’re damned to hell.”

Explain to me why I shouldn’t see it that way? It’s not a challenge, I’m not taking an aggressive standpoint here, I am genuinely curious how people view Catholicism if not rigid and oppressive, and why they don’t view it that way.
Click to expand...
I am an adult convert, and moreover, I came into the church from a secular upbringing that presented the church (and especially Catholicism) exactly as you’ve described it.

I would say this: you see this as a series of rules imposed on someone about how to live their life. But it isn’t. It’s about a loving God who is trying to help us find our best path in life, and our best path in life is to follow Him because it leads to Him. So, if I’ve wandered off, away from God’s path, yes, I’ll end up in a different destination - one that isn’t the best destination - but that isn’t because God is punishing me for not following His path; it’s because I chose not to follow it.

Similarly, my decision to do what God wants is a CHOICE, and it isn’t made out of fear of what might happen if I don’t. If you love someone and you know they love you, you do things that you know will make them happy. If you know that they prefer when you remember to take the garbage out, then you do that because it is a loving act. Similarly, if I know that God loves me, and I love God, then I seek out those actions and behaviours that I know will make God happy.

For me, this faith isn’t one of rules and mandates. It’s one of love.
 
I haven’t the answers you seek … I am a cradle Catholic … and I do believe that we should do all the things the Church asks of us to please our Lord … but I also believe in His Divine Mercy … so I know if I don’t totally measure up when my time comes, that His mercy will save me … I would advise to read St. Faustina’s Diary about the Divine Mercy … it may help you to see things differently. God Bless
 
Cassandra_Lyn said:
It seems to me an extremely rigid lifestyle with tons of rules that dictate to people how they are supposed to behave and live their lives. As a recovering addict, I tend to gravitate towards very rigid, very all or nothing, ways of looking at things, so when I became a Christian last fall, Catholicism was the immediate draw, because it was all “this is the way, this is the only way, everything else is wrong, you have to do this, this, that, that and this, and do it all the right way, and if you don’t, you’re damned to hell.”

Explain to me why I shouldn’t see it that way? It’s not a challenge, I’m not taking an aggressive standpoint here, I am genuinely curious how people view Catholicism if not rigid and oppressive, and why they don’t view it that way.
Click to expand...
It does seem that way at first.

However, I noticed that Christianity seems to be paradoxical. Jesus seems to talk about this, like the humble being exalted, the poor being blessed. Read the Beatitudes.

Within the rules, one finds freedom. I know it is counterintuitive however think of this way.

Let’s talk about financial freedom for example. Financial freedom does not mean spending indiscriminately but about controlling one’s spending, following rules that in the end will assure you that you are free from financial stress and worries. You are free from debt.

The Church teaches chastity. I find that being chaste keeps the drama away. No fear of disease or unexpected pregnancies.

Now let’s talk about temperance. Sticking to a good diet and exercise, assures one of health and freedom from diseases brought about by being overweight.

Know what I mean?
 
Cassandra_Lyn said:
You’re comparing human beings with appliances? We aren’t machines.
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Haha, that’s kinda harsh. :'D I wasn’t saying that we’re machines though, I was just using an oven as to show my point.
But I guess that shows that my attempt at explaining things wasn’t very helpful.
I do hope that someone else can help you more! 👍 God bless!
 
If I were that simple, that would be GREAT! lol

The analogy that did make sense to me was the one of financial freedom through being disciplined when it comes to money. Because I say all the time that I don’t want money to buy stuff, I only want enough money to not have to think about not having money. That’s financial freedom to me - being free of the fear that if i lost my job or if I quit my job I’d be living in a cardboard box inside of a month.
 
Cassandra_Lyn said:
If I were that simple, that would be GREAT! lol

The analogy that did make sense to me was the one of financial freedom through being disciplined when it comes to money. Because I say all the time that I don’t want money to buy stuff, I only want enough money to not have to think about not having money. That’s financial freedom to me - being free of the fear that if i lost my job or if I quit my job I’d be living in a cardboard box inside of a month.
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Have spent some time with homeless, takes away some of those fears, though I go back to my old insecurities quite quickly, even though having experienced God’s Providence again and again first hand. Was very liberating how little we can survive on and the generosity of just a few people out of many passing by enlivens the faith. But funnily enough when, on the very few occasions(can count them on one hand) within a whole lifetime that I’ve given away all that I’ve been given, I’m never feeling empty or lost or scared. But these times are very rare occasions, and most of the time I’m loaded up like a fully laden camel trying to fit through a narrow passage, unable to unburden myself by myself.
 
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