So where do you stand on “gay marriage”? I think it is relevant and may help explain why you take the position you do when discussing those with SSA. Or it may not!
This frustrates me to no end (but I have to let it go … after this response).
We have a choice to speak to this topic in a prudent - non-political way, or not.
If we de-politicize it, and call it for what it is, it is a union between two persons of the same-sex,in contemporary terms, is referred to a marriage.
TWO HUGE THINGS need to be clarified before you will ever get into the real kernel of Catholic truth;
a) using the word “gay” without clarifying wither you are speaking towards that which is not specifically chosen (attractions) and that which is specifically chosen (embraced identity)
and
b) using the word “marriage” without first clarifying whether you are using it in a historical/Catholic sense, or a contemporary sense.
As well, the conversations seems to be locked in this cycle of a non-advancement into the realm of the role and significance of embraced identity.
I guarantee you one thing - if persons do not embrace the falsehood that being gay/straight is “who they are” (really our sexuality is
only one facet of our beings, and thus an
embraced identity centered on our sexuality (distinct from “sex”) cannot, cannot reflect the fullness of who we are as persons), then pursuing relationships in order to fulfill themselves within that identity will not occur - because those types of relationships will fall outside the set of what that persons deems to be fulfilling for their own life.
It’s a run on sentence, but sorry that’s all the gas in the tank I have for editing right now.
Anyway, the real issue to focus on when talking about “gay marriage” (which should really be phrased as " 'gay ‘marriage’ " because it contains TWO terms that mean different things to different people), is not the “‘gay’ ‘marriage’” itself, but the reasons why persons decide to pursue any form of relationship - specifically one that is designed to be a means of fulfillment AHEAD of a relationship with Christ (namely one that serves to validate a person in the gay OR straight identity - BOTH being identities centered on sexuality).
The Church sees us **all **as persons - actually persons who are beloved by our Creator God. If we were to elevate ourselves above the labels of LGBTQTS, then the horrifically dangerous and life-influencing
ascribed labels like “
gay boys” would not be used towards boys who experience same-sex attractions, and thus would not serve to form their self-concept and potential future embraced identity. The Church invites us to elevate the language - the secular world does not.
Until the conversation is elevated to contain a disclosure of the differences between non-specifically chosen and specifically chosen, and “marriage” (historical) and “marriage” (contemporary), these dialogues will never be able to potentially reflect the fullness of Catholic teaching on this matter. It is really that simple. however, that means essentially an overhaul of the way we commonly speak towards this topic. An overhaul such that the truths that non-specifically chosen attractions do not necessitate any particular embraced identity, AND that persons who experience attractions xyz, CAN be honest about with themselves about the existence of those attractions without choosing to embrace the LGBTQ labels - which is what forms self-concept again and motivates persons to fulfill what they understand to be their sense of purpose in their lives on account of embracing those types of identities.
In English: being gay is not “who I am”, unless I choose that to BE who I am, and as a person who has been permitted the experience of same-sex attractions, I choose to not self identify according to my sexuality because I recognize that we are more than that. It is really that simple. Oh and by the way - I harbor no shame for the existence of my attractions - because I didn’t specifically choose my attractions anyway. That’s just in case anyone was going to accuse me of living in fear or self-pity or guilt. Life is quite joyful as a chaste celibate who knows that my identity needs to be rooted in Jesus Christ first and foremost.
Peace!
youtube.com/watch?v=YI3H3z2CKIQ
A bit of what I am saying is explained in this TWO minute video - please check it out!