Why would God give us the gift of a pregnancy and then take it away?

[txsoldier94]

yessisan,

My wife and I lost our second and sixth children to miscarriage. I cannot explain why these things happen…

We live in a fallen world, where evils happen. The best we can do is to draw closer to our Saviour, and avail ourselves of the solace of Holy Mother Church.

Our children will be waiting for us when we cross that final threshold.

God bless,

Mik

 

[Nino]

God is a meany…He gives us a brain so we can study and learn about stuff…but some of us are soooo lazy we become hoodlums or just politicians…as to your question,its an old one…God is just not with it is He or is it a She or an it??? We have many gifts the greatest is of free will…only we of all of Gods creatures have that gift…there for we are responsible for our actions…and so if we abuse that gift and instead of advising women as to what they can expect with giving birth and the risks involved…etc etc…we fall short…by we I mean the medical profession which since they eliminated the hypo oath have become mediocre at best…my Creator does not make any mistakes only I do…if you feel …well different…so be it…good luck…I am only human and thus not as wise as the secular humanists that run the world…sorry…

 

[yessisan]

God is a meany…He gives us a brain so we can study and learn about stuff…but some of us are soooo lazy we become hoodlums or just politicians…as to your question,its an old one…God is just not with it is He or is it a She or an it??? We have many gifts the greatest is of free will…only we of all of Gods creatures have that gift…there for we are responsible for our actions…and so if we abuse that gift and instead of advising women as to what they can expect with giving birth and the risks involved…etc etc…we fall short…by we I mean the medical profession which since they eliminated the hypo oath have become mediocre at best…my Creator does not make any mistakes only I do…if you feel …well different…so be it…good luck…I am only human and thus not as wise as the secular humanists that run the world…sorry…

 

[SMHW]

Yessi, the baby I lost also died as a result of a traffic accident rather than as as some sort of genetic abnormality or problem with me. I was much further along in the pregnancy so the mechanics of what happened were very different but the eventual result was the same: a child who would not be born alive.

As I mentioned to dixieagle, God does not make a point of stepping in to save us everytime we are on a collision course with the laws of physics and biology. Those of us who manage to live to be born are in constant danger from all kinds of things. Until recent times in our world history it was uncommon for children to make it to their second birthday due to the likelihood of death from disease, starvation, or injuries. In some parts of the world things haven’t changed much.

But I think somehow we think our own life is somehow special. We know other babies die but we don’t expect it to happen to OUR baby. It’s a hard lesson to realize that we are not safe from the effects of original sin… which include traffic accidents.

I know that for years after the accident that took the life of my baby I wonder what it was that I could have or should have done differently to prevent what happened. Well, I know I could have gone home after work instead of trying to drive to the post office to mail my tax return (especially since it didn’t get mailed that day since I never made it to the post office.) I could have stopped to buy fuel for the car first. I could have chosen a different route. All those things woud have kept me out of the path of the wrong-way driver that hit me. But I did do what I did and I’m fairly sure that neither God nor my guardian angel tried to suggest I should do otherwise.

We think we are asking, “Why does God allow suffering?” The answer to that question is actually very simple: because we live in a fallen world. But I think the question we tend to overlook is,
“Why do we have such a hard time accepting the evil in our world?”
What happened to my baby and me (I suffered some injuries too) was a result of evil in the world. That’s the same reason your baby died. But the reason it is so hard to accept is that pain and death are foreign to God and we are made in his image. We instinctively know that death is not what we are made for and yet we are doomed to die a physical death. That’s why Christ’s death and resurrection are so amazing. It’s like a big joke on the devil. The sentence for sin (death) becomes the means to life.

 

[dixieagle]

yessisan,

My wife and I lost our second and sixth children to miscarriage. I cannot explain why these things happen…

We live in a fallen world, where evils happen. The best we can do is to draw closer to our Saviour, and avail ourselves of the solace of Holy Mother Church.

Our children will be waiting for us when we cross that final threshold.

God bless,

Mik

That really is it, in a nutshell!

 

[yessisan]

SMHW, I had no idea your baby died because of a car accident also. I’m so very sorry :hug1: Your accident was far worse than mine, I don’t remember much of the accident, just the fear of losing the baby. I don’t know how fast we were going, I just remember looking at the rear view mirror and seeing that car approach me and not slowing down. Heck, the damage to my car was only $1000… I too think sometimes about how I could’ve prevented the accident. I could’ve entered the freeway at a different street, I could’ve gotten gas, I could’ve gone back into the house to get something I forgot but I decided to just leave, I could’ve swirved the car to the right to avoid the hit but it never occurred to me. I wonder what life would be like still being pregnant with my child…

What you guys say is starting to hit home and making some sense to me… it’s all because of the original sin…

 

[yessisan]

yessisan,

My wife and I lost our second and sixth children to miscarriage. I cannot explain why these things happen…

We live in a fallen world, where evils happen. The best we can do is to draw closer to our Saviour, and avail ourselves of the solace of Holy Mother Church.

Our children will be waiting for us when we cross that final threshold.

God bless,

Mik

I’m sorry about your babies…

 

[dixieagle]

SMHW, I had no idea your baby died because of a car accident also. I’m so very sorry :hug1: Your accident was far worse than mine, I don’t remember much of the accident, just the fear of losing the baby. I don’t know how fast we were going, I just remember looking at the rear view mirror and seeing that car approach me and not slowing down. Heck, the damage to my car was only $1000… I too think sometimes about how I could’ve prevented the accident. I could’ve entered the freeway at a different street, I could’ve gotten gas, I could’ve gone back into the house to get something I forgot but I decided to just leave, I could’ve swirved the car to the right to avoid the hit but it never occurred to me. I wonder what life would be like still being pregnant with my child…

What you guys say is starting to hit home and making some sense to me… it’s all because of the original sin…

This brings to mind a show I saw within the last year with several parents and grandparents who had lost children through accidents for which they could not forgive themselves…terribly sad. There was one poor grandmother who had backed over her 2 year old grandson in the driveway, killing him, because he had slipped out out of the carseat, unknown to her, and stood behind the car. This poor lady had been tormented, though her daughter and son-in-law had long since forgiven her. You could see a light dawning on her when another woman, whose children had been killed in an accident while she was driving, said that the grandmother had “been caught being human.”

Sometimes we make mistakes, sometimes others do, sometimes embryonic development takes a wrong turn, sometimes people drink and get behind the wheel; it is all as a result of Adam and Eve’s loss of Paradise. But, this is all temporary; the really good stuff, where we will be reunited with our lost little ones, lasts FOREVER!

 

[SMHW]

SMHW, I had no idea your baby died because of a car accident also. I’m so very sorry :hug1:

Thank you Yessi.

You will probably always wonder what life would be like if you still had Julian with you here. (I still sometimes wonder what life would have been like if I had my Steven.) And you will probably spend a lot of time thinking about what you could have done to prevent the accident. That is normal.

You do have to go on with your life. But that doesn’t mean you have to stop asking why and what if. Part of grieving is asking those questions. But eventually you have to ask a different question: “What now?” It doesn’t make the other questions go away. It just sort of moves ahead of them in line.

I’ve come to a place in my life where I really don’t think that what happened to my baby was for some great God-given reason. But I do know that because of what happened there are some good things that have happened to me and good things that I have been able to do for others. I mean, here I am, years later, conversing with you on the internet. I’d like to think that is Steven’s and my gift to you.

I think that’s how God often works. He may sometimes prevent evil from happening. But more often He lets us use our experience with evil to bring good into the world. He doesn’t plan the evil but he uses it as an opportunity to bring good into the world that otherwise could/would not have happened.

I believe that if you ask God, he will let Julian help you find opportunities to bring good into the world.

 

[txsoldier94]

I’m sorry about your babies…

Please, don’t be sorry. Yes, I am saddened that I never had the chance to hold them is this life, but they are waiting, praying to Our Father in heaven that I might join them there.

God bless,

Mik

 

[Mayo]

Our second child died while being born because the Cord was around her Neck. She was full term. It was a home delivery 48 years ago in the U. K. I went and got the Priest and she was Baptised within an hour of being born. I was always told that if a stillborn baby is baptised within an hour of being born they go to Heaven so we always felt we had a little Angel in Heaven. That thought has always given us comfort and helped us handle the loss. We had eight more children after that.

Mayo

 

[catholic2]

My thoughts and prayers are for all who have lost their children especially for young mothers who have lost their child in miscarriages. I don’t know the depth of your sorrow, nor do I know why it happened, I only know that God in his mercy acts in a way we cannot fathom, and He joins in our suffering. Because all things are possible with God and He answers our prayers, we who are of faith can have comfort. I pray often for my three grandchildren who I will not see in this life.

 

[yessisan]

Our second child died while being born because the Cord was around her Neck. She was full term. It was a home delivery 48 years ago in the U. K. I went and got the Priest and she was Baptised within an hour of being born. I was always told that if a stillborn baby is baptised within an hour of being born they go to Heaven so we always felt we had a little Angel in Heaven. That thought has always given us comfort and helped us handle the loss. We had eight more children after that.

I’m sorry to hear this Mayo.

And te part about the baptism gives me hope. I baptized my baby w/in minutes…

My thoughts and prayers are for all who have lost their children especially for young mothers who have lost their child in miscarriages. I don’t know the depth of your sorrow, nor do I know why it happened, I only know that God in his mercy acts in a way we cannot fathom, and He joins in our suffering. Because all things are possible with God and He answers our prayers, we who are of faith can have comfort. I pray often for my three grandchildren who I will not see in this life.

Thank you for these words.

 

[Island_Oak]

…why allow a woman to become pregnant if she is going to miscarry or give birth to a stillborn baby?

The gifts of life and family fellowship on this earth are temporary ones for **all **of us. Why do you feel infants, children (or anyone for that matter who dies before the age of 96) is somehow being “cheated?” The promise of “life” of which we read so much in the bible refers to eternal life spent with God. Anyone who dies as an inocent has that assurance~in a way~an advantage over the rest of us who can squander our time here and pollute our relationship and risk an eternity with God. Your child could be in no safer place than in the company of angels, the arms of Our Lady and the presence and protection of God. Nothing can or will ever tempt, injure, infect, terrify or isolate your child. Your pain and feelings of loss while bitter, ARE temporary if you can accept the teachings of the Faith.

 

[Chris_LaRock]

Another thread got me onto thinking about this, but I had thought about it before too since I just lost my baby 2 months ago.

Why does God give us the gift of a child and then take it away? Meaning, why allow a woman to become pregnant if she is going to miscarry or give birth to a stillborn baby?

We are living in a fallen creation, and because of that things that God never intended to happen take place.