Wife becoming Protestant, I'm staying Catholic

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My wife has decided to go to a non-denominational Christian center. She says she wants to focus on reading the Bible only.
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Unfortunately for your wife she’s turning her back on the primary source of Sanctifying Grace: the Seven Sacraments. Grace is gift from God bestowed on us through the merits of Jesus Christ in order to save us. The Sacraments are the visible signs instituted by Christ to give us grace in order to sanctify us. The idea of a “Bible-Only Christian” is a Satanic deception. The reason we know the Books of the Bible are inspired in the first place is because of the Sacred Tradition of the Catholic Church. No where in the Bible does it tell us what books are included in the Bible. Thus all these self-appointed freelance Bible interpreters have to trust the Catholic Church that the Bible is indeed inspired. But the Church was teaching with authority before the New Testament was even written. Jesus did not hand out Bibles, He established a Church and gave His Church authority to teach throughout the ages until the end of time.

I would recommend you have your wife watch the following video, as it explains why it is such a great tragedy to leave the Catholic Church:

youtube.com/watch?v=KXLUwoiqjmk
 
I was in a similar position myself, over 10 years of marriage. One difference was that my wife just drifted by degreees, and never made any new allegiances. I find it encouraging (probably) that your wife at least stands for something.

I agree with the previous posters who have said that you should avoid any brinkmanship or attempts to impose Catholicism on her. Be strong in your own prayers and knowledge of the faith, but be wary with arguments.

I would recommend a simple and firm approach to the raising of the children. If you agreed before marriage that the children would be raised as Catholics then hold very firmly to that, on the basis of “This is what we agreed”. Discuss how your wife’s current religion can be incorporated into that. For example, you priest may give you a dispensation to attend Church services with her on alternate weekends. You would be much better off keeping peace in the household, while raising the children Catholic, than setting up a running battle.

You are in my prayers,

Edmundus
 
Thank you all for your advice.

I have to add that I have a lot of fault in what is going on in our home. I feel that I haven’t been a good spiritual leader. Almost two years ago, it was me who thought that leaving the Catholic Church for the Mormons was the best for the family. The missionaries painted such a perfect environment for us to raise our children in, that I was caught, and fooled into the LDS cult.

But it was also me who realized that the Mormons are wrong in their beliefs, and that they are not at all perfect like they want to be seen by others outside.

So, I have to admit that, even though I was doing it with the best intentions, looking for the best for my children and our family, I am at fault for creating such chaos in my home.

I’m very sorry for this, and she knows it. But she also knows that I’m learning more about our faith, our Catholic heritage, and that I don’t agree with several of the teachings of the Church. (I never ask Mary nor the saints for their intersession, for example.)

I’m afraid that if I tell her that, since our children were baptized as Christian Catholics, the kids have to be raised Catholics, she will say that I’ve created such chaos that she also has a right to raise them however she wants.

The main objections she has to the Catholic Church are:
  1. All the emphasis on Mary and the saints. She says nothing compares to praying directly to God (I kind of agree with her here…). She now uses the word “idolatry” a lot… She’s sounding so evangelical already: of course I don’t tell her that.
  2. The cover up of sexual abuse in the Church. (Again, I agree with her here…)
  3. Most Catholics we know are not spiritual nor religious at all… (Agree here, too.)
Although I agree with her in those points, I have done my research and I know that
  1. Mary and the saints are not gods! We respect them and try to be like them in following our Lord. We ask for their prayers just like we ask family and friends to pray for us.
  2. The media have turned the sexual abuse cases into a big circus. Just a very small percentage of bishops and priests have participated in the cover up. The vast majority of priests are men of God, humans who make mistakes as well.
  3. I have to worry about my own salvation, and that of my wife and children. God will judge me directly, he’s not going to held me accountable for my neighbor’s sins…
I often listen to Father Juan Rivas, who has a Spanish-language radio show called Hombre Nuevo in Los Angeles. (His website, www.hombrenuevo.net).

He has a really cool apologetics show, that airs here in San Diego on 1390 AM from 5 p.m. to 6 p.m. He once said that if some Catholics have many reasons based on the Bible to leave the Church, us who decide stay have MANY, MANY reasons MORE to remain Catholics.

In these few past months that I’ve been praying and reading about our Church and faith, I know that this is the Church that our Lord established. Although after a year of being Mormon I somehow feel uncomfortable in a lot of places, I know I’m at peace when I have Communion.

En Cristo,
Pablo
 
pabloSD said:
My wife has decided to go to a non-denominational Christian center. She says she wants to focus on reading the Bible only.

Yesterday, she took the image of Our Lady of Guadalupe off our bedroom’s wall. She said that we won’t have any more images other than Jesus and crosses in our home. That’s fine with me.

But what worries me is our children. I know I have a duty to raise them Catholic, because we’re a craddle Catholic family. The children are baptized, we were married in the Church. All of our family heritage and history is Catholic.

How have you dealt with a spouse who left the Church, and how are you raising your small children?
Thanks!
Pablo
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If your wife really wanted to focus on reading the bible only, she shouldn’t be going to ANY Christian center because that puts the focus on more than reading the bible.
 
Sorry you’re having this trouble. I’d put my religious pictures back up…and consult a priest for help…and pray.
 
1ke said:
it shouldn’t be.

Enlist your famiy, enlist your friends, enlist your priest. Her soul is in great peril as long as she persists in this direction. Do all with charity, love, and prayer. But, don’t sit back and have a “that is OK with me attitude.” It’s not OK.
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Does this mean every protestant or orthodox member of the faith who the Church acknowledges are “Christians” are in peril?

Last I checked those with valid baptisms were all Christians regardless of sect of denomination.
 
mitex said:
Does this mean every protestant or orthodox member of the faith who the Church acknowledges are “Christians” are in peril?

Last I checked those with valid baptisms were all Christians regardless of sect of denomination.
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Yes, your in RCIA so I imagine your safe.😉
 
mitex said:
Does this mean every protestant or orthodox member of the faith who the Church acknowledges are “Christians” are in peril?

Last I checked those with valid baptisms were all Christians regardless of sect of denomination.
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Good question. I always get mixed responses.

I have had Catholic priests tell me that in no way I am in peril because I have been baptized and that I believe in the basics. That I just don’t “have the fullness of truth” and they do.

Then I come on here and posters claim that we are deceptive, evil, in peril, etc.

THEN I see comments on other threads that say Muslims and others who aren’t even Christian can be saved yet my soul is in grave danger. :confused:
 
Nicea325 said:
My first question to her: Where does Jesus teach all one needs is read the Bible?

BTW: One cannot read their way to Heaven.
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Sola Scriptura doesn’t make much sense. The Bible wasn’t codified until the Fourth century. What did Christians do for the three hundred years between the Resurrection and Nicea? Obviously the tradition of the Church plays a pivotal role. If it wasn’t for holy tradition, how would we even know what scripture was?
 
mitex said:
Does this mean every protestant or orthodox member of the faith who the Church acknowledges are “Christians” are in peril?

Last I checked those with valid baptisms were all Christians regardless of sect of denomination.
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Here I agree with you, mitex. The Mormons were always using scare tactics to make us stay. I know there’s salvation outside of the Catholic Church. The Catechism says so, too.

I’m not afraid that my wife’s soul is in danger. She will stay be following Christ. The main reason why it’s important for me that she stays Catholic is so that she can have the Sacraments and so that our whole family can be on the same road.
 
Kristin234 said:
THEN I see comments on other threads that say Muslims and others who aren’t even Christian can be saved yet my soul is in grave danger. :confused:
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This is absolutely ridiculous and comes out of a persistent (at least on CAF) misreading of the already-erroneous “Anonymous Christian” of Karl Rahner, SJ. That some members seem to believe the further away from truth one is, the higher the chance of being saved is, with those who are virtually identical (and Protestants are virtually identical to Catholics outside of very few non-ecclesiastical matters, closer than even Orthodox in several key respects such as the very nature of God) having the least chance.
I know there’s salvation outside of the Catholic Church. The Catechism says so, too.
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By definition there can be absolutely no salvation outside of the Catholic Church. The Catechism twists this (probably by an act of poor wording) only by expanding the historical definition of “Catholic Church” to include an invisible structure such as the traditional Protestants believe in (abandoning the Catholic conception of the Church as a real and visible organization in the process, along the lines of misguided Mr Rahner, SJ’s Anonymous Christian doctrine), as well as the visible structure (the actual Catholic Church). You do realize that most traditional (i.e. Presbyterian, Reformed, Methodist, Anglican) Protestants admit as much, that there is no salvation outside of the Catholic Church, and believe that they are members of the true (invisible) Catholic Church as Calvin wrote on in his Institutes. This is evidenced by the use of the Niceno-Constantinopolitan Creed by many of the older Protestant groups, including the line, “We believe in the One, Holy, Catholic and Apostolic Church”.
 
Kristin234 said:
Good question. I always get mixed responses.

I have had Catholic priests tell me that in no way I am in peril because I have been baptized and that I believe in the basics. That I just don’t “have the fullness of truth” and they do.

**Then I come on here and posters claim that we are deceptive, evil, in peril, etc. **
THEN I see comments on other threads that say Muslims and others who aren’t even Christian can be saved yet my soul is in grave danger. :confused:
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I know how that must feel and I’m a Catholic and I dont’ like it either when people say that
kind of stuff.🙂
 
pabloSD said:
Here I agree with you, mitex. The Mormons were always using scare tactics to make us stay. I know there’s salvation outside of the Catholic Church. The Catechism says so, too.

I’m not afraid that my wife’s soul is in danger. She will stay be following Christ. The main reason why it’s important for me that she stays Catholic is so that she can have the Sacraments and so that our whole family can be on the same road.
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One of the Six Sins Against the Holy Spirit is the presumption of Gods mercy. You cannot do what you want in life and presume that God will just save you. Someone that willfully leaves the Church founded by Christ is much more culpable than someone brought up in complete ignorance of the the truth. She is willfully rejecting the Bride of Christ in the Catholic Church and the Sacraments instituted by Christ and entrusted to the Church?
 
Kristin234 said:
Good question. I always get mixed responses.

I have had Catholic priests tell me that in no way I am in peril because I have been baptized and that I believe in the basics. That I just don’t “have the fullness of truth” and they do.

Then I come on here and posters claim that we are deceptive, evil, in peril, etc.

THEN I see comments on other threads that say Muslims and others who aren’t even Christian can be saved yet my soul is in grave danger. :confused:
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It’s actually possibly worse if you’ve been a Catholic and at some later point along your journey you have a change in beliefs.

CCC 846 “Hence they could not be saved who, knowing that the Catholic Church was founded as necessary by God through Christ, would refuse either to enter it or to remain in it.”

Whatever that means. As I’m not sure if it means such a believer can not be saved since “could not” is a tense of “can not” or if it means might not. 🤷
 
hudson said:
One of the Six Sins Against the Holy Spirit is the presumption of Gods mercy. You cannot do what you want in life and presume that God will just save you. Someone that willfully leaves the Church founded by Christ is much more culpable than someone brought up in complete ignorance of the the truth. She is willfully rejecting the Bride of Christ in the Catholic Church and the Sacraments instituted by Christ and entrusted to the Church?
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I agree with Hudson. Talk your wife into re-entering the Catholic faith, but if she will not you have a duty as a Catholic to use all reasonable force as the husband and head of your family to FORCE her back into the Catholic faith. Her soul is in serious danger as there can be no leaving the Catholic church once one has been baptised into it. By doing so she is rejecting the Apostolic succession established by our Lord Jesus himself through Saint Peter.
 
I don’t agree with several of the teachings of the Church. (I never ask Mary nor the saints for their intersession, for example.)
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Then that’s your problem. Pray the Rosary, it will bring you and your family closer to Christ–and protect you from falling away into error and further from God. Devotion to Mary always brings you closer to Christ.
The main objections she has to the Catholic Church are:
1. All the emphasis on Mary and the saints. She says nothing compares to praying directly to God (I kind of agree with her here…). She now uses the word “idolatry” a lot… She’s sounding so evangelical already
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When we ask Mary or the saints to pray for us we glorify God, because they are God’s masterpieces living with Him in heaven.
  1. The cover up of sexual abuse in the Church. (Again, I agree with her here…)
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Christ said there would be weeds among the wheat and and wolves among the sheep. Regardless of the scoundrels in the Church, the Church will always teach the truth and the way to salvation. But sexual abuse cover-up happens in many organizations, including football teams.
  1. Most Catholics we know are not spiritual nor religious at all… (Agree here, too.)
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There are 1 billion Catholics in the world. Your judgment of the few you know may be giving you a false impression. I would suggest you read of the countless lives of the saints the Church has produced throughout the ages…

Here is a video with the 20 mysteries of the Holy Rosary, which is a meditation on the life of Christ. The more you know Christ the more you will love Him, and the more you will die to yourself and want to live for God alone:

youtube.com/watch?v=5crbtwXYc1U
 
Luvtosew said:
I don’t feel rebuking a spouse is a good thing, don’t let her read this thread, or she might never come back to the Church. God Bless, pray for her, be gentle and loving, and give her space. And leave the family photos up please, don’t make things worst.
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I agree. Depends on which posts of the thread though. 🙂
 
Yehuda_Dion said:
I agree with Hudson. Talk your wife into re-entering the Catholic faith, but if she will not you have a duty as a Catholic to use all reasonable force as the husband and head of your family to FORCE her back into the Catholic faith. Her soul is in serious danger as there can be no leaving the Catholic church once one has been baptised into it. By doing so she is rejecting the Apostolic succession established by our Lord Jesus himself through Saint Peter.
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I think you and I are not exactly on the same page. I think she should be told the truth, but it is up to her to either turn away or accept it. At that point you as a husband did your best to try and save her soul. At that time, prayer is your best hope and being able to give a defense anytime she questions your faith.
 
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