Wishing to be Protestant again...

[ethereality]

Hey OP,

I’ve noticed the same thing, and, after reflecting on it, I’ve settled on this three-pronged approach:

1. 
   *]Continue going to Mass regularly (minimum being every Sunday).
   *]Establish fellowship at the local Catholic church; if there’s not a Bible-study, start one, etc.
   *]Participate in non-Catholic churches, doing your best to live with and educate their members as brothers and sisters in Christ, to bring them home to the Church that Jesus established.
   Regarding the United States of America, with #3 I see – or hope for – a future wherein formerly-Protestant churches remain the unique, local, often-neighborhood gatherings of fellowship that they are, where people can live as is comfortable for them, with their Worship services (some prefer soulful energetic homilies, music and dancing; some prefer rock music, some prefer austerity) but without the doctrinal error that separates them from all the graces God has for us. That is, everyone would go to Mass on Sundays – or daily, as the case may be – and then continue with their own communities doing whatever additional things they wanted …
   
   Eh, I feel I’m not being very clear. What I’m trying to say is that there’s no reason every Protestant church in the city cannot correct its doctrinal error and continue to exist serving God through serving one another. I think the dominant thing keeping the members of these churches from the Sacraments is ignorance; I think we are called to educate ourselves in Christian history and theology and then participate in their Bible studies, in their Worship services (although refraining from their Communion services), and so on, bridging the gap, educating them and bringing them home. We’re not fixing anything by keeping separate from them.
   
   There is so much to be gained from it, too. In my city, for example, there is a Lutheran, Episcopalian and Methodist church all within visible distance of the Catholic church – and they built them there specifically to compete with the pre-existing Catholic church. This division drives away non-believers, as it gives the impression that Christianity is a confused book-club, as commercial as a hamburger franchise. If enough in my city were to participate in those small Lutheran, Episcopalian and Methodist communities, educate them and bring them back to the Church, then not only is the local church’s community that much stronger and friendlier, but now it has more power to bring in the unbeliever and end social injustice one person at a time.
   
   I still feel I’m not speaking very clearly, but I hope some of this makes sense. Be active in your local Catholic church, and be active in the closest Protestant church to your home. (In my case, it’s apparently some new denomination, “Disciples of Christ”, formed in the late-19th century. It’s about three minutes by car, about five times closer than my local Catholic church.) Doing both, we can mend the holes formed in the 16th century, one day at a time.
   
   It will require more of your time on Sundays, but then, that’s what Sundays are for, right?! So I go to Mass at 8 am, then this Protestant church’s service at 10 am … Or, if the service times don’t work out, maybe go to the second-closest Protestant church … Of course, it’s foolish to go with the purpose of converting; the purpose is to live as brother and sister in Christ – sharing the fullness of truth is simply an obligation of love that we carry as we live as brothers and sisters in Christ.
   
   So, I suppose, in a sentence, I’m advocating bringing the two communities together, as Jesus prays in John 17 that we may all be one as he and the Father are one.

 

[Cat]

I would like to add something about Protestant churches. Keep in mind that my husband and I were staunch, hyper-involved evangelical Protestants for the first 47 years of our lives.

Yes, in a lot of Protestant churches, people welcome visitors and regulars to church.

But that doesn’t mean that they’re going to become your deep and loyal friends, or that they truly care two hoots for you.

Wal-Mart greeters are warm and welcoming. Would you say that they are your best friends that you enjoy regular fellowship with?

In the last church we were part of (the church we were ousted from), lots of people were our friends before the ousting. After the ousting, they shunned us, except for one family, and that family shunned us after we became Catholic.

Fellowship and friendship is a lot more than just friendly words, although I think that the friendly words would certainly be a good thing for Catholics to learn how to say.

In our parish, there are greeters in the lobby who welcome people and hold the door open. IMO, this isn’t “Protestant”–it’s just good manners. The greeters are not effusive or physical. They are very low key, very much like the Wal Mart greeters. I see nothing to criticize and much to praise about their ministry. Our parish is in the middle of several hugely successful Protestant megachurches, and people have lots of options for “doing church” in this area of the city. It is wise of our parish to at least make an attempt to be welcoming and friendly.

And I would say that in our parish, there are many MANY opportunities for making friends outside of Mass. There are several Bible studies, lots of social groups for all ages, and many service groups.

I personally think that making friends has to start with ME, not YOU. I should say hello to you. I should strike up conversations with you. I should ask if you would like to go out for coffee or lunch after Mass. This is the way to make friends, just like we did back in grammar school or junior high school–we have to make the first move, and be consistent in trying to get together with the person we think would be a good friend. If we wait and wait for others to approach us and “be our friends,” we will never have friends. Pick out someone that you see often at Mass and seems to be kind of nice and perhaps has something in common with you (you both drive Fords? you both sing out loudly during Mass? you both wear Birkenstocks? you both have teenagers? etc.) and make the effort to make friends. What’s the worse that can happen? He/she will say, “Thanks but not interested.” So find another friend.

 

[ConfusedTim]

Hi, I chose that title to be somewhat provocative to hopefully garner people who could reply to this thread. I converted from Protestantism more than 10 years ago and I am happy to be Catholic. However, having said that I do miss much of the social aspects of a Protestant church. There were programs and bible studies for every age group; there were many ways of connecting to different people in your church–I had lots of friends in church and we would call each other up and do things together. There would be family picnics and other outings the church would sponsor.

In my 10 years of being Catholic my knowledge of truth has increased but at the cost of fellowship. I’ve been around 4 different Catholic churches in 10 years and all of them seem to be not much more than ‘Eucharist factories’ where you shuffle the people in, give them a boring homily, the Eucharist and shuffle them out until next week when you can do it again. The earliest youth group starts at high school.

I have brought some of my brothers and sisters in to the Church, but we all are beginning to pine for the days when going to church was enjoyable.

It does really appear to me that the Catholic Church, as an institution, does not foster fellowship anywhere near as much as the Protestant churches do. Am I wrong?

And before you say to me, “Well then, you get something started at your church!”, I’m trying to make the point that as an institution the Catholic church does not foster fellowship. I don’t want to be one person trying to roll a rock up hill, I want to be part of a Church that encourages fellowship.

As I mentioned before, I helped bring others to the Catholic Church, but now I’ve got a dilemma. My two kids, ages 12 and 13 are really complaining about going to our ‘boring church’ when their Protestant friends do all these really fun activities their churches sponsor. And I have an older son who may be considering becoming Catholic, but he has 4 children ages 1-6. I wince at the prospect of telling him he can’t put his children in Sunday School while he and his wife go to mass, but instead he has to keep four children under control for an hour while having to listen to a boring sermon. These are not show stoppers, but they really detract from giving incentives to joining the Church.

Any thought are welcome. But does anyone else see this lack of fellowship problem?

Jesus suffered and died on the cross for our sins.

So now thats over we want entertainment.

 

[ConfusedTim]

my wife went to an evaneglical church - had loads of friends (or so she thought) had bible study groups, family groups, the whole 9 yards.

She left to become a catholic and was subtley but completely dropped bt her "friends’

If you are looking for a social life get one - it may or may NOT be in the church.

 

[Ahimsa]

The Church is an army, not a tea-party.

 

[crazzeto]

I personally think that making friends has to start with ME, not YOU. I should say hello to you. I should strike up conversations with you. I should ask if you would like to go out for coffee or lunch after Mass. This is the way to make friends, just like we did back in grammar school or junior high school–we have to make the first move, and be consistent in trying to get together with the person we think would be a good friend. If we wait and wait for others to approach us and “be our friends,” we will never have friends. Pick out someone that you see often at Mass and seems to be kind of nice and perhaps has something in common with you (you both drive Fords? you both sing out loudly during Mass? you both wear Birkenstocks? you both have teenagers? etc.) and make the effort to make friends. What’s the worse that can happen? He/she will say, “Thanks but not interested.” So find another friend.

I loved this whole post Cat, but I particularly loved this last paragraph!

 

[Adonia]

Hi, I chose that title to be somewhat provocative to hopefully garner people who could reply to this thread. I converted from Protestantism more than 10 years ago and I am happy to be Catholic. However, having said that I do miss much of the social aspects of a Protestant church. There were programs and bible studies for every age group; there were many ways of connecting to different people in your church–I had lots of friends in church and we would call each other up and do things together. There would be family picnics and other outings the church would sponsor.

In my 10 years of being Catholic my knowledge of truth has increased but at the cost of fellowship. I’ve been around 4 different Catholic churches in 10 years and all of them seem to be not much more than ‘Eucharist factories’ where you shuffle the people in, give them a boring homily, the Eucharist and shuffle them out until next week when you can do it again. The earliest youth group starts at high school.

I have brought some of my brothers and sisters in to the Church, but we all are beginning to pine for the days when going to church was enjoyable.

It does really appear to me that the Catholic Church, as an institution, does not foster fellowship anywhere near as much as the Protestant churches do. Am I wrong?

And before you say to me, “Well then, you get something started at your church!”, I’m trying to make the point that as an institution the Catholic church does not foster fellowship. I don’t want to be one person trying to roll a rock up hill, I want to be part of a Church that encourages fellowship.

As I mentioned before, I helped bring others to the Catholic Church, but now I’ve got a dilemma. My two kids, ages 12 and 13 are really complaining about going to our ‘boring church’ when their Protestant friends do all these really fun activities their churches sponsor. And I have an older son who may be considering becoming Catholic, but he has 4 children ages 1-6. I wince at the prospect of telling him he can’t put his children in Sunday School while he and his wife go to mass, but instead he has to keep four children under control for an hour while having to listen to a boring sermon. These are not show stoppers, but they really detract from giving incentives to joining the Church.

Any thought are welcome. But does anyone else see this lack of fellowship problem?

I agree with you. As a cradle catholic who has worshiped many times with others of different denominations there is probably more fellowship in those churchs. But, fellowship is not my main reason for attending church. It is the worship of Our Lord with the Sacraments that He gave us. This is the form of worship that I find most meaningful. While the other denominations have much “fellowship”, they lack the “Real Presence” of Our Lord. It’s that simple! Now, I feel that at this time I am making an effort to have more fellowship with my fellow believers. I am doing things within the church that I have never done before. But in the end I do not go to church for fellowship, it’s all about worship.

 

[RitaKatheleen]

I would like to add something about Protestant churches. Keep in mind that my husband and I were staunch, hyper-involved evangelical Protestants for the first 47 years of our lives.

Yes, in a lot of Protestant churches, people welcome visitors and regulars to church.

But that doesn’t mean that they’re going to become your deep and loyal friends, or that they truly care two hoots for you.

Wal-Mart greeters are warm and welcoming. Would you say that they are your best friends that you enjoy regular fellowship with?

In the last church we were part of (the church we were ousted from), lots of people were our friends before the ousting. After the ousting, they shunned us, except for one family, and that family shunned us after we became Catholic.

Fellowship and friendship is a lot more than just friendly words, although I think that the friendly words would certainly be a good thing for Catholics to learn how to say.

In our parish, there are greeters in the lobby who welcome people and hold the door open. IMO, this isn’t “Protestant”–it’s just good manners. The greeters are not effusive or physical. They are very low key, very much like the Wal Mart greeters. I see nothing to criticize and much to praise about their ministry. Our parish is in the middle of several hugely successful Protestant megachurches, and people have lots of options for “doing church” in this area of the city. It is wise of our parish to at least make an attempt to be welcoming and friendly.

And I would say that in our parish, there are many MANY opportunities for making friends outside of Mass. There are several Bible studies, lots of social groups for all ages, and many service groups.

I personally think that making friends has to start with ME, not YOU. I should say hello to you. I should strike up conversations with you. I should ask if you would like to go out for coffee or lunch after Mass. This is the way to make friends, just like we did back in grammar school or junior high school–we have to make the first move, and be consistent in trying to get together with the person we think would be a good friend. If we wait and wait for others to approach us and “be our friends,” we will never have friends. Pick out someone that you see often at Mass and seems to be kind of nice and perhaps has something in common with you (you both drive Fords? you both sing out loudly during Mass? you both wear Birkenstocks? you both have teenagers? etc.) and make the effort to make friends. What’s the worse that can happen? He/she will say, “Thanks but not interested.” So find another friend.

I so agree with you. My Husband were in the ministry in the SBC (Southern Baptist Convention) for over 10 years and attended and served fatihfully for about 13 years not to mention that I have been following a protestant faith for nearly all of my 40 years and it was VERY social. I did miss it at first because I was so accustomed to it - until I realized that I needed to be focused only Christ and not people and learning the catholic faith. I’m a recent convert having just been confirmed this Easter. I have been attending catholic churches for about 2 years here and there and I do know this that you have to find the one that fits your “preference” for lack of a better way to put it. My family has visited 5 different churches in the last two years and the most wonderful thing is that although they were mostly all different in one aspect or another they all held the same TRUTH! I went through the beginning stages at a more formal probaly very conservative/traditional church so it did help me to focaus on Christ not people - I really believe that thats what I needed to truly get the fullness of the faith. I went through the RCIA in that church and with the full support of my priest who is incredibly wonderful and told us from the beginning that it was okay to visit other churches and find the parrish that was right for us. Now we attend a church that I would say is more contemporary and there is more fellowship there. But I agree with the fact to have friends you have for be friendly yourself and its not just waiting for people to come to you. One way to get involved and get to know people is by going to daily mass. That in itself can be a great way to get to know people. But definately reach out!

 

[Deconi]

I ALWAYS find it amusing that people miss the ‘fellowship’ / frienship / fun they had at other gatherings!

What happened that stopped that? Can you not CONTINUE to see your friends and arrange outings / picnics / socialising with them any longer because YOU feel they won’t accept you or is it because THEY have ostracised you for becoming Catholic?!? So your friendships / fellowships was conditional, FALSE??..and you MISS it!!!

There are multitudes of activities in EVERY Catholic parish that need to be arranged, organised and actioned, but it’s ‘work’ …not geared towards fun! Social activities can be arranged for the parish members from time to time…but this is a BREAK from ‘working’ for the life of the parish and the church.

Catholics do not arrange or provide fun activities to ATTRACT or RETAIN Catholics. That is why RCIA is not a same day service ‘sign here and you’re a Catholic’ format! We aren’t called to gather amongst ourselves and do feel good activities.

Our mission is to proclaim Christ to all. That doesn’t mean necessarily going on missionary work abroad, or sitting around proclaiming Christ within the Church members (which is basically proclaiming Him back to Himself) It is in how we conduct ourselves to all others we encounter during EVERY day! Christian and non-Christian.

Our fellowship, is to be with others that we encounter outside our parishes; in the community; workplace; anywhere! To examplify the faith within us! Exactly the same as when you were Protestant or whatever!..except the Light within you is NOW DIFFERENT!

We gather to strengthen each other, at Mass, The SOURCE of all that a Catholic is!

If you find Mass and the homilies boring, it is because you do not comprehend in Whose Presence you are in and inconsiderate that He may be addressing someone else of your brethren! This selfishness may be a residue of ‘where’s the fun activities and the thumping sermons?’ of a previous chapter in a life.

Seriously, if you want activity in your church life, BE ACTIVE in the life of your church!

We all know what the OP means and why s/he sees things this way. I’m sure Our Lord was a funny guy but the Scriptures do not detail He was a fun guy to be around! His ‘picnics’ were overcrowded and his ‘homilies’ were boring and ‘dangerous’ and at times, outright ludicrous! “…unless you eat my body and drink my blood…” ???

Where’s the fun in that for a Catholic to follow?

As Catholics we seek a different level of enjoyment. For our souls to soar with joy at hearing Our Master’s voice. Plenty of time for fun activities, eternally, if we make it!

 

[FrankM]

Been there…go to a different parish…sounds like that is a parish the bishop needs to look at.

***Nice idea, but my very recent experience with Bishops is they are not interested in that. Only monthly budget forecasts, cutting costs by hiring cheap and unsafe labor, seeing themselves on TV, and having other clergy protecting them from the catholic public. Almost sounds like a politicians antics, doesn’t it? My question to all of them is, Where is the faith for the Holy Spirits intervention and guidance. ***

 

[crazzeto]

Frank,

What Bishop have you been looking at? Your expereince is very A-Typical at least in so far as what I’ve experienced. In fact everything you posted is directly contrary to not just my expereince, but all of the evidence at hand.

 

[BettyM]

I agree with you. As a cradle catholic who has worshiped many times with others of different denominations there is probably more fellowship in those churchs. But, fellowship is not my main reason for attending church. It is the worship of Our Lord with the Sacraments that He gave us. This is the form of worship that I find most meaningful. While the other denominations have much “fellowship”, they lack the “Real Presence” of Our Lord. It’s that simple! Now, I feel that at this time I am making an effort to have more fellowship with my fellow believers. I am doing things within the church that I have never done before. But in the end I do not go to church for fellowship, it’s all about worship.

I agree so much. Sunday Mass, attending church is about worshiping the Lord not having fun with others and being entertained.

 

[Hiskid1973]

Jesus suffered and died on the cross for our sins.

So now thats over we want entertainment.

I sure don’t get how people believe protestants are all about being entertained…I been following Christ for almost 40 years is hardly about being entertained…His desire is that we mature in the faith and walk in obedience to His will in our lives…There are hot and lukewarm believers among us all…Those who are cold to the Lord don’t even care…He sees peoples hearts He alone knows who is worshiping Him in Spirit and those whose hearts are far from Him…

People usually ignore large print posts, I know I do

 

[Lady_Mariegrace]

I appreciate the compassionate postings, and prayers. They are encouraging.
Someone mentioned Mary and being close to her and not knowing how i might feel with her coming from a Protestant background…Mother Mary is a wonderful comfort to me and i frequently ask her and many saints to pray for me in my time of confusion and bewilderment. I also listen to the divine office morning and night on my IPod to keep His word ever before me and it has been a great source of comfort. I love things available like this from the Catholic Church.
I am not really a shy person, I am outgoing if i understand the venue and like to talk to people if i have something in common or attempt to find something in common. My age group is a problem since i do not have children in any Catholic schools and i did not attend a Catholic school so both these tend to limit areas of conversation, then being single, again is also limiting. I am a voracious reader but haven’t really found anyone locally who likes to read the books that i do or talk about the things i ponder. so oh well, onward and upward.

 

[crazzeto]

I appreciate the compassionate postings, and prayers. They are encouraging.
Someone mentioned Mary and being close to her and not knowing how i might feel with her coming from a Protestant background…Mother Mary is a wonderful comfort to me and i frequently ask her and many saints to pray for me in my time of confusion and bewilderment. I also listen to the divine office morning and night on my IPod to keep His word ever before me and it has been a great source of comfort. I love things available like this from the Catholic Church.
I am not really a shy person, I am outgoing if i understand the venue and like to talk to people if i have something in common or attempt to find something in common. My age group is a problem since i do not have children in any Catholic schools and i did not attend a Catholic school so both these tend to limit areas of conversation, then being single, again is also limiting. I am a voracious reader but haven’t really found anyone locally who likes to read the books that i do or talk about the things i ponder. so oh well, onward and upward.

Does your parish have a young adult ministry? That would be a terrific way to meet young Catholics (mid twenties to mid thirties) both married and single, with childeren and no.

 

[Catholicnow]

Agreed. We travelalot and when we go to a Church in a strange town, not one person says welcome. But when I go to a protestant Church almost everyone welcomes you and shows an interest. Invites you to join them for lunch or if a gathering is going on in church to that.

I think it has to do with how Protestant view themselves, we are to be in the world and not of it. So you will find much fellowship, however it seems catholics don’t have the same concern

 

[FrankM]

Frank,

What Bishop have you been looking at? Your expereince is very A-Typical at least in so far as what I’ve experienced. In fact everything you posted is directly contrary to not just my expereince, but all of the evidence at hand.

Really? What is evidence at hand’? Hearsay, what you read about, or is posted in a bulletin? I, unfortunately, am speaking first hand. First person, my personal experience. How many people have, or have tried to have a one on one meeting with a Bishop? Not happening. That’s what I meant by Where is the faith? I still believe in the Holy Spirits presence. Thank God, because the ‘churchs hierarcy’ makes me wonder. Not going to get too personal here, as it would be very easy to figure out who I am talking about. Thanks for your reply and God Bless!

 

[crazzeto]

Really? What is evidence at hand’? Hearsay, what you read about, or is posted in a bulletin? I, unfortunately, am speaking first hand. First person, my personal experience. How many people have, or have tried to have a one on one meeting with a Bishop? Not happening. That’s what I meant by Where is the faith? I still believe in the Holy Spirits presence. Thank God, because the ‘churchs hierarcy’ makes me wonder. Not going to get too personal here, as it would be very easy to figure out who I am talking about. Thanks for your reply and God Bless!

I’m also speaking from my first hand experience, with our Bishop here where I live… Also With Archbishop Adam Mida in Detroit (where I was raised). You have yet to provide anything factual, when you get something factual might I suggest you start your very own thread on this very topic, rather than derailing another posters thread?

 

[mary_bobo]

my wife went to an evaneglical church - had loads of friends (or so she thought) had bible study groups, family groups, the whole 9 yards.

She left to become a catholic and was subtley but completely dropped bt her "friends’

If you are looking for a social life get one - it may or may NOT be in the church.

Very good points.

 

[Catholicnow]

You are not weird for feeling the way you do. Prepare in this thread to get a million guilt trips about how you’re making it all about YOU and not God and the typical low expectations that “it is what it is” type arguments. You’ll also get replies that say things like, “if you want more fellowship, why don’t YOU make it happen!?” when in reality one needs to ask, why after 100 years of being a parish in my town has nobody else thought of childcare, fellowship, Bible study, greeters, or overall friendliness? Are you really the first person to want fellowship at that parish? It’s institutionalized the whole lack of fellowship and it shouldn’t be up to just you to organize.

You are good at predictions, over I’d say 85 percent who responded did so as you said they would