Women and clothes (it's NOT about modesty, thanks)

[VivienneJ]

There has been a somewhat off topic discussion developing on the thread: Issue with mother-in-law (forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?p=10866750#post10866750) which could develop into something light-hearted, but would be better in it’s own thread, so let’s move it to a new one.

TRJ and I have had some fun and I’m sure there are others who could relate to this.

 

[VivienneJ]

Since I have no idea how to split a thread, I’ve copied the relevant discussion here:

Oops! :hug3:

I’m reminded of a situation I got into between my parents and mother-in-law. MIL sometimes bought me clothes, a relation would take her to really cheap stores and she would get things for the girls and something for me too. Usually the outfits were horrible, but I would try to wear them at least once when she was around, even if never again. One day I was wearing a rather dowdy dress for her benefit and my parents made a surprise visit (in itself almost unheard of). My father was so shocked by what I was wearing that he insisted on giving me some money every month that I had to spend on clothes for myself Lucky he forgot about it after four or five months - I had too, until I read this thread.

You’re fortunate your parents didn’t nominate you for “What Not To Wear!” LOL I wouldn’t mind getting for new clothing, but having everyone in the country see my pathetic current wardrobe would give me enough shame to last the rest of my life = I’d turn down the gift.

Thank goodness there was no such thing back then!! The monthly amount was a only a fraction of than, but still incredibly difficult to spend. At the time I was a stay-at-home mom, who had been working recently enough to still have way more clothing than I needed; the requirement to get more for me, when I had children rapidly outgrowing clothes and needing a large amount for each new season, was tough.

At one point, I had 2 opposite ends of the fashion spectrum - very casual, comfortable clothing for most of my real life, and very formal evening dresses b/c the company my husband worked for would throw annual formal Christmas parties! The contrast was quite amusing, and we have a saying around here for seeing a woman dressed up when she is normally not, “Why, you clean up real good!” That is what a lot of people probably thought when they saw me dressed up and going out for the Christmas party…

I had a neighbour who ‘cleaned up really good’ one Christmas Eve another neighbour saw her in a crowded supermarket and only recognised her by her children who were with her. He exclaimed, loudly, “Gosh * you look so different with your clothes on!”

 

[HoosMommie]

I got nothing funny to add, but I just want to say that you two make me laugh

 

[LSK]

I recently (over the last two years) lost 120 pounds. I am still pretty curvey but I am wearing ‘normal’ clothes (ranges from size 6 to 10 depending on the cut).

All of a sudden, I had to buy new clothes.

I was petrified…and today am the proud owner of three pairs of jeans (one blue,one black and one white), pants for work, dresses for Mass and enough tee shirts to choke a horse.

I should be nominated for what not to wear…I have no idea what TO wear.

 

[TheRealJuliane]

I recently (over the last two years) lost 120 pounds. I am still pretty curvey but I am wearing ‘normal’ clothes (ranges from size 6 to 10 depending on the cut).

All of a sudden, I had to buy new clothes.

I was petrified…and today am the proud owner of three pairs of jeans (one blue,one black and one white), pants for work, dresses for Mass and enough tee shirts to choke a horse.

I should be nominated for what not to wear…I have no idea what TO wear.

:clapping::clapping::clapping::dancing:

Wow, congratulations on the weight loss!!! Yeah, losing 120 lbs. (another person!) would necessitate a few shopping trips. I have to ask, where did you find dresses??? I can find separates, suits, but I rarely find nice, simple, Mass-appropriate dresses. I am to the point of taking a pattern to a tailor to have some made. I can’t sew or I’d try it myself.

I really love to watch “WNTW” because I do get some ideas about what is “in” and what I can look for without looking like I’m trying to be 30 again. Women “of a certain age” look ridiculous in the really trendy clothing but I can try to accessorize and at least keep somewhat current. Except that in my case, I can’t even shop for accessories without having an anxiety attack.

One problem is that clothing is SO EXPENSIVE! And so cheaply made! I saw a top in a department store a few weeks ago, and it was nothing that special, just an inner tank top with an over-blouse attached, and it was $69!!! Ack! I just can’t do that, I would have a hard time spending that on a nice dress, let alone a cheaply-made (India or Vietnam, as I recall) top.

 

[TheRealJuliane]

Since I have no idea how to split a thread, I’ve copied the relevant discussion here:

I had a neighbour who ‘cleaned up really good’ one Christmas Eve another neighbour saw her in a crowded supermarket and only recognised her by her children who were with her. He exclaimed, loudly, “Gosh * you look so different with your clothes on!”

:bigyikes:

Bet THAT got a few shocked stares from fellow shoppers and store clerks!

 

[Kelfa28]

Me too.
I had a slight fashion crisis right after I got married, had my daughter and became a SAHM.
I had spent the last 7 years of my life working two jobs that required a uniform. Plus…being single meant I was still going out with my girlfriends to bars and clubs.
The clothing I did own was fairly suitable for a teenager about to graduate from high school and start college.
Except I was in my late 20s, married, a new mom and a Catholic convert.

So…90% of what I own was really unsuitable. I had to go shopping for a fairly new wardrobe and I had no idea where to begin.

My problem is…I keep getting pregnant…

I’m doing much better this time then last time. Last time I couldn’t afford much and was reduced to wearing sweats all the time. This time I actually own some nice dresses.

 

[HoosMommie]

I cruise Pinterest for outfit ideas. A lot of what is on there involves items of clothing I simply won’t wear (short shorts, skinny jeans, etc) but I see the general idea of color combos or accessories, etc. It’s quite helpful for this 63 year old who has a fear of frump that borders on phobia.

 

[R1ch4rd]

One problem is that clothing is SO EXPENSIVE! And so cheaply made! I saw a top in a department store a few weeks ago, and it was nothing that special, just an inner tank top with an over-blouse attached, and it was $69!!! Ack! I just can’t do that, I would have a hard time spending that on a nice dress, let alone a cheaply-made (India or Vietnam, as I recall) top.

Hey, tell me about it. A few years ago, not sure how many, I joined our parish usher’s club. My wife made me buy a new suit and I had to pay almost a hundred bucks for it. She thought the one that cost 30 bucks more looked nicer and I should get it, but it didn’t come with a vest and extra pair of pants. I’ve taken good care of it and it still kinda fits so if I croak, I hope she doesn’t do something stupid…like buy a new one.

 

[hannajomar]

I would be a great candidate for What Not to Wear!
I’ve felt that I somehow missed that part of “girl class” where you learn to spend a lot of time, money, and energy doing yourself up. I admire women who always look so put together, but it’s just not in me to be like that. I do the best I can. I’ve had more than one person try to “help” me over the years, but I feel okay in that regard.

 

[TheRealJuliane]

I would be a great candidate for What Not to Wear!
I’ve felt that I somehow missed that part of “girl class” where you learn to spend a lot of time, money, and energy doing yourself up. I admire women who always look so put together, but it’s just not in me to be like that. I do the best I can. I’ve had more than one person try to “help” me over the years, but I feel okay in that regard.

Tell me about it, I was raised by my father! I learned how to change the oil on my car, change the tire, hammer a nail straight, and do some cooking, but fashion? Dad was dressed up when his jeans were clean.

 

[VivienneJ]

I recently (over the last two years) lost 120 pounds. I am still pretty curvey but I am wearing ‘normal’ clothes (ranges from size 6 to 10 depending on the cut).

All of a sudden, I had to buy new clothes.

I was petrified…and today am the proud owner of three pairs of jeans (one blue,one black and one white), pants for work, dresses for Mass and enough tee shirts to choke a horse.

I should be nominated for what not to wear…I have no idea what TO wear.

Well done, that is a fantastic achievement!!!. And such fun to shop for ‘normal’ clothes.
I recently lost the equivalent of the baggage allowance I came here with, and still find my mind wants me to go to those huge size outfits while my hand makes its way to the smaller ones - lovely feeling!!

I have to ask, where did you find dresses??? I can find separates, suits, but I rarely find nice, simple, Mass-appropriate dresses. I am to the point of taking a pattern to a tailor to have some made. I can’t sew or I’d try it myself.

I was recently delighted to find some really tight fitting t-shirts, well made and inexpensive…and you’re wondering where this comment is going …that fit perfectly under the low-cut sleeveless dresses that are not suitable for daily wear where I am, leave alone for Mass. Although I have just taken some t-shirt material to have some made with longer sleeves for work; and some cotton for a dress - I should have collected them last weekend, but the tailor had a virus and was sick for a few days, so Sunday it will be.

I really love to watch “WNTW” because I do get some ideas about what is “in” and what I can look for without looking like I’m trying to be 30 again. Women “of a certain age” look ridiculous in the really trendy clothing but I can try to accessorize and at least keep somewhat current. Except that in my case, I can’t even shop for accessories without having an anxiety attack.

One of the things I had the most fun recognising when I turned 50 (some years ago) was that I was comfortable in my own skin at last and would wear what I like (within reason)

 

[LaMusicaSenior]

I have too many clothes and don’t wear them all enough But I did run across a fashion blog tonight called “Putting Me Together,” in which she remixes all the clothing in her closet, and teaches you how to do it too!

Now, that means I have to clean my closet .

Chloe M.

 

[VivienneJ]

I have winter clothes “at home” that I’d never dream of bringing here - it’s hot enough.

Then I have summer clothes “at home” that aren’t really suitable for here either, for other reasons.

That saves me flying with clothes twice a year. And a have a whole wardrobe of clothes here that I know too well, but which will be brand new to family and friends when I retire.

What’s that saying that if you haven’t worn it in a year you don’t need it? Some of my clothes only just make it into that “once a year” category!

 

[Viki63]

I have too many clothes and don’t wear them all enough But I did run across a fashion blog tonight called “Putting Me Together,” in which she remixes all the clothing in her closet, and teaches you how to do it too!

Now, that means I have to clean my closet .

Chloe M.

That blog is cute, but the young woman is well, young. I wish there was a similar one for older ladies. I cleaned out my closet a month ago and found things I had no idea were there. But I still tend to wear the same things day in and out, since nobody seems to notice what I wear to work.

 

[TheRealJuliane]

I have winter clothes “at home” that I’d never dream of bringing here - it’s hot enough.

Then I have summer clothes “at home” that aren’t really suitable for here either, for other reasons.

That saves me flying with clothes twice a year. And a have a whole wardrobe of clothes here that I know too well, but which will be brand new to family and friends when I retire.

What’s that saying that if you haven’t worn it in a year you don’t need it? Some of my clothes only just make it into that “once a year” category!

Well, that rule is for those of us who don’t travel or work in locations that have radically different weather than where we normally live. And one has to use a bit of common sense - if they are special occasion clothes and they still fit, and you have the room, you can keep them. I had several full-length dresses to give away once my husband left the Christmas-party company. There was no reason for me to hold onto them since at that time, no one was throwing that type of party and my husband was getting ready to go out on his own as a contractor.

At the moment I am in the position so many of us are in…I have 20 lbs to lose and a lot of decent clothing in my previous size that I am having a hard time letting go of. Yet simply having the clothing isn’t an incentive to get me to take the actions in order to lose the weight.

 

[VivienneJ]

At the moment I am in the position so many of us are in…I have 20 lbs to lose and a lot of decent clothing in my previous size that I am having a hard time letting go of. Yet simply having the clothing isn’t an incentive to get me to take the actions in order to lose the weight.

My daughter made an interesting comment a few years ago about the clothes I was hanging onto because they would fit me again “one day”. She asked if I would still want to wear them if it so happened that I did lose the weight - looking at them in that light cut down the number of “hopeful clothes” in my wardrobe very quickly.