Wonderlust vs. True, Romantic Love

[ManOnFire]

Pop culture media will continue it’s assault on marriage by continuing to attempt to seduce men away from loving their wives by parading scantilly-clad hotties to the masses. Loveless wonderlust steals men’s attention away from true love of the heart. And pop culture media is only getting racier and trashier. Women are competing to be trashier than the next in the name of fashion. These kids shows involve 14 year olds displaying cleavage for crying out loud! How trashy! They’re promoting more sex than true, romantic love. How can love survive in such a graceless age? Women make much of the financial decisions in a home. You need to organize amongst yourselves to form a boycott against this sleaze and trash. Please consider joining onemillionmoms.com. I’m ready to get rid of my cable TV. We need to take action against the media for masturbating us men into the wrong direction with this trash. Take away their financial incentive, and you can save marriages and heartbreak all over the world. True romantic sacrificial love needs to make a comeback.

We Men (and many women) need to realize that the wonderlust of infatuation does not equal true love. Our attention-deficit disorder society was created by the speed of modern life in an instant gratification world. Wonderlust is quicker and shallower, but wears off quickly. True love is deep. If Liz Taylor was more mindful of the difference, maybe she would not have been married 8 times. We need to be mindful of the difference and long for the true, romantic love and reject the shallowness, even if it means distancing ourselves from pop culture media.

Personally, I’ve found that it’s too hard to “ride the fence” in this culture. Pop culture is driving a giant wedge which is pushing us to choose between the selfish feelgood-ism of love-less sex, drugs, gambling, etc. VERSUS giving humble sacrificial true love for our spouses, kids, jobs, friends, etc., where we give 95% of our waking hours in service to everyone else, and deeply and lustfully appreciate the last 5% we get for ourselves. “Knowing how to live” is easy in this scenario. “Service to others” is the challenge, duty, and obligation, “The Climb.” Satisfaction is the reward.

Help your men (and women) to see this, and you’ll look forward to the 5% you get for yourself, and feel your heart sing as you are closer to God while giving the 95%.

 

[ManOnFire]

Why can’t more people see that pop culture has become the puppetmaster, masturbating a once strong people into a weak people who can’t wait for the next shallow, temporary, feelgood pleasure? This shallowness steals true love, depth of character, and weakens people into becoming dependent upon their next pop culture stimulation. If more people would be independent of pop culture, non-conformist to pop culture, and open-minded to move away from pop culture, we can entertain ourselves with the depth of true love. We would be able to stop worshipping the false god of pop culture and renew hope and faith in true love and humanity.

 

[Sierrah]

Everytime I’ve fell head over heels it’s always been a bad sign. The guys were players. It’s only happened twice though and each time I used my head and not my heart and saved myself a lot of grief.

 

[ManOnFire]

All relationships end in someone getting hurt, until you find “The Right One.” Carry on, bounce back from hurts, and have faith that eventually… The best thing you can do is be conservative and help get rid of all the garbage in the media that is luring good men astray. At the very least, get politically active and stop giving them your money.

 

[flyingfish]

I don’t think the media is to blame here, people are this way by nature and would be media or not. The only thing that media does is make images of attractive men and women easily available, otherwise people would be doing the old fashioned thing and “lusting” after attractive people in real life.

 

[climer97007]

True love is deep… We need to be mindful of the difference and long for the true, romantic love and reject the shallowness, even if it means distancing ourselves from pop culture media…

Romance, passion, sexuality, etc… We begin to experience authentic intimacy when we begin to experience the first intimacy of all human beings, and that is the divine intimacy we were all created to share with the God of the universe. This first intimacy, this divine intimacy, this infinite intimacy is the foundation upon which all others are truly built. We can insert the word love in place of intimacy, or insert romance, or insert passion.

With a personal, abiding, indwelling relationship with the infinite God, there exists a means to measure those intimacies, those romances, those passions, those feelings, those thoughts, which are less, that are constrained and limited by the mercurial nature of mere humanity. Indeed without this first and divine intimacy, there exists only a pretense of intimacy at one level or another and the blindness that fills the voids.

I think even romance can mascarade as some kind of pretense…

 

[ManOnFire]

I don’t think the media is to blame here, people are this way by nature and would be media or not. The only thing that media does is make images of attractive men and women easily available, otherwise people would be doing the old fashioned thing and “lusting” after attractive people in real life.

After all the science, scripture, and “proof” has been debated ad nauseum to a stalemate, it seems to come down to faith, hope, and love.

1. Faith: One needs to choose to believe, or choose to disbelieve
2. Love: One chooses primarily love of others ahead of self, or primarily love of self ahead of others.
3. Hope: One either hopes for more superficiality or hopes for more depth

Most of society’s problems center around the above. The human brain cannot find an adequate reason to place love of others ahead of love of self unless a “Covenant of Behavior” exists between God and the individual, such that the individual believes there is someone else of the opposite sex out there in the world who also subscribes to the Covenant, such that each individual, separately, barring undue surrender to the temptation of pop culture’s lifestyle, has a reasonable belief that both parties will come to live by the Covenant, where the Covenant of God serves as a bridge of behaviors and beliefs between man and woman. In this way, man and woman can feel reasonably comfortable sacrificing for the greater Good (God) by sacrificing for each other and their kids. In this way, families should live by God’s Covenant. Ideally, children are raised in a family of where their role models display sacrificial love, and the children learn sacrificial love, and learn to pass it on to the next generation. This fails in our modern society where, with our free will, if God’s Covenat is not taught or learned properly, we have enough free will to choose to allow pop culture’s influence to become stronger than God’s covenant. In this way, it’s only logical that the individual places self ahead of others, the individual runs from responsibility, duty, sacrificial love, in favor of the simple, shallow basic instincts of primarily focussing on the pursuits of orgasmic sex, mind altering substances, more money, bling, and other superficialities. Ironically, sacrificial love creates STRONG people who are more INDEPENDENT of superficialities, and love of primarily self creates people who are WEAK, living by their basic instincts for pleasure and more likely to run from loving and being responsible for others! Liberalism means liberation from living by God’s Covenant of true, sacrificial love. How ironic.

Media is not promoting true, romantic love as much as they are promoting attraction, desire, lust, passion. Just look at all of the broken home themes on TV. Don’t tell me that regular families are too boring. Media is the one who created that message by peddling the instant gratification of orgasmic sex, mind altering substances, more money, bling, and other superficialities. Unfortunately, too many Americans really are shallow enough to follow whatever values the unelected CEOs of media promote. The media creates the culture. The culture elects the politicians.

I’m very concerned about good Catholic women being able to find a good Catholic man who subscribes to the Covenant. It seems good Catholic women need to look HARDER THAN EVER. Too many men don’t want to wait for a white wedding because pop culture has dictated the values. Pop culture is leading more and more people away from being a strong people who follow God’s Covenant. It’s easier for us men to be led astray by scantilly-clad hotties. Like it or not, that’s our nature. That’s why you women need to organize against pop culture’s illicit messages with your pocketbooks. Women are the primary spenders in a household. Create a world where true love rules. You’ll be helping yourself to find an adequate, real husband at the same time, and you’ll be helping him to be a stronger man.

 

[John21652]

Pop culture media will continue it’s assault on marriage by continuing to attempt to seduce men away from loving their wives by parading scantilly-clad hotties to the masses. Loveless wonderlust steals men’s attention away from true love of the heart. And pop culture media is only getting racier and trashier. Women are competing to be trashier than the next in the name of fashion. These kids shows involve 14 year olds displaying cleavage for crying out loud! How trashy! They’re promoting more sex than true, romantic love.

If you Google The Sexualistaion of Young Girls you will see that a lot of people all around the world are worried by an ever increasing trend to make girls into sex objects. And from a very young age.
From Great Britain - An inquiry into the apparent “sexualisation” of young girls by advertisers and manufacturers has been launched by the Government as part of a wider probe into violence against women.

From Britain, citing a US study - Sexualisation ‘harms’ young girls .

From Australia - a national seminar on Children & the Sexualised Media

Also from Australia, a Sydney Morning Herald article Adult world must let girls be girls.

Again from the UK - “Premature Sexualisation” Pushing Young Girls into Depression and Self-Harm:

That atricle tells us -

Eileen L. Zurbriggen, PhD, chair of the APA task force that ran the study said, “The consequences of the sexualisation of girls in media today are very real and are likely to be a negative influence on girls’ healthy development.”

“We have ample evidence to conclude that sexualisation has negative effects in a variety of domains, including cognitive functioning, physical and mental health, and healthy sexual development.”

Here’s a submission to the Australian Senate Inquiry on the Sexualisation of Children

Now change your Google search to the Sexualisation of Women and learn more.
From here we read

The teenage world revolves around sex. And to be on the top, you have to ooze the most sexuality.

From this article we read that

Today’s children, she says, are bombarded with enormous doses of graphic sexual content but are simply not mature enough to process or understand the images or messages. Worse still, very young children are routinely exposed to images of sexual behaviour which appear devoid of emotions, attachment, or consequences and can be frightened by what they see.

“Sex often appears as the defining activity in relationships, to the exclusion of love and friendship and is often linked to violence,” she says. “Children also learn to associate physical appearance and buying the right products not only with being sexy but also with being successful as a person. These lessons will shape their gender identity, sexual attitudes, values, and their capacity for love and connection.”

Todays teenagers are taught that if you’ve got it, flaunt it. Sexuality is given free reign to early and too easily. Is it any wonder that teen pregnancies are on the rise, with abortions, divorce and the rise in single parent families.

So how did it happen? I for one blame the women’s liberation movement, all the way back to the 1960s and 1970s. Who hasn’t heard of Germaine Greers The Female Eunuch, in which she wrote that womens true freedom would come about with women’s sexual freedom. She and her ilk let a cat out of the bag that has gone on to claw and scratch the very people she thought she was liberating. Instead of liberation, women have gained imprisonment. They are increasingly imprisoned in the stereo type of a sex object and the problem is worsening.

Men aquiesced. To do otherwise would have drawn cries of derision and screams of “discrimination”. And of course it suited a lot of men, for they were the beneficaries of women’s new found sexual freedoms. Or so they thought. In reality, they too have suffered, as our OP ManonFire points out. Male - Female relations have suffered and the true love and devotion that prior generations craved has become more and more elusive. The ability to discern as young ones enter into relationships has been lost. Too many are being caught up in relationships too quickly and they are being damaged when they fall apart and there is a cost to society, monetary and social.

How to fix it? Women need to stand up and fight to regain their femininity and stop the culture of ‘if you’ve got it, flaunt it’, because there is a whole lot more to being a woman than that.
So I’m told! .

 

[ManOnFire]

Amen, John. My wife tried to buy a bra for my daughter in a local store. My wife said all they had were PADDED bras (none unpadded for sale). For a tweenager? It sounds like we need some new conservative clothing companies! Something bright and colorful, but not trashy. I’m surprised more moms are not more upset and proactive about all the trashions out there. Following pop culture’s forced conformity :nope: :hypno:

 

[flyingfish]

Not so long ago it was common for young girls to marry older men, it still is common in some places in the world.

 

[ManOnFire]

If we are ideal Catholics where true love is our number one priority, age won’t matter and free choice of a mate will provide the best chance for a successful marriage.

 

[mamabear3]

“age shouldn’t matter.”

not so long ago it was customary for older guys to marry young girls. today we call that SEXUAL ABUSE. young girls do not have the freedom to make choices about marriage or sex,( because their too young to understand) so it would not be a free choice for the young girl it would be a free choice for the man.

 

[John21652]

“age shouldn’t matter.”

not so long ago it was customary for older guys to marry young girls. today we call that SEXUAL ABUSE. young girls do not have the freedom to make choices about marriage or sex,( because their too young to understand) so it would not be a free choice for the young girl it would be a free choice for the man.

Hang on mamabear, no one has given any ages of “young girls” here, so it’s a bit premature to be throwing in the “sexaul abuse” remarks. I think the original post about young girls marrying older men referred to the fact that men used to marry later, after they were established and their wives would often be considerably younger, but no-one is suggesting they’d be under age.

 

[mamabear3]

to me a young girl means under age. WOMEN have the free choice to get married, not young girls.

 

[ManOnFire]

“age shouldn’t matter.”

not so long ago it was customary for older guys to marry young girls. today we call that SEXUAL ABUSE. young girls do not have the freedom to make choices about marriage or sex,( because their too young to understand) so it would not be a free choice for the young girl it would be a free choice for the man.

I wasn’t talking about minors. What happened a few hundred years ago has no relevance to this original post. I live in the U.S. If it’s happening in other countries today, then it’s wrong.

 

[pnewton]

I don’t think the media is to blame here, people are this way by nature and would be media or not.

It is irrelevant what would happen with or without the media.

Mattew 18:6 But whoso shall offend one of these little ones which believe in me, it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea.

7 Woe unto the world because of offences! for it must needs be that offences come; but woe to that man by whom the offence cometh!