Work related matter, asking for opinions

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Valentine’s day seemed to be a normal day. So today at work I just got back from lunch and went to my desk. I checked my email to see if anything new came up while I was on break. So read read read. I read an email from my boss. I was rather bothered by it. Apparently, HR informed him that I should observe proper etiquette when it comes to sending email referrals. The email said that I should have included a message instead of just attaching the referee resume.

Now I’m a person that’s easy to talk to. When I’m reprimanded, or told what I did wrong or incorrectly, or simply instructed, these are okay with me. In fact these are good things because I’m willing to learn and improve.

But I was bothered by this because it isn’t my first time to refer a job applicant. The first time I referred was in December. I referred an old friend, who is now working in our company and doing very well so far in fact. But when I made that email referral, I didn’t get any correction or instruction that I should have included a note blah blah. If what I did was incorrect, why didn’t they correct me the first time I did it? That’s what bothers me. And I have made several referrals after that.

The reason I didn’t include a note is because I followed the exact format in the email format. Followed the format for the email subject, attaching the resume. That’s why there’s no message body. I guess I feel bad because I ‘did not follow proper etiquette’. I think I feel bad because I really put a lot of effort in communication, esp. in making emails whether at work or personally. It seemed like I was discourteous and impolite, and it wasn’t something that I intended.

I haven’t replied to the email. I would like to ask for advice as to what I should say. Should I even reply? Should I simply say 'Sorry, I’ll do better next time"? Or should I explain why I didn’t include a message body? Thanks in advance.
 
fin said:
Valentine’s day seemed to be a normal day. So today at work I just got back from lunch and went to my desk. I checked my email to see if anything new came up while I was on break. So read read read. I read an email from my boss. I was rather bothered by it. Apparently, HR informed him that I should observe proper etiquette when it comes to sending email referrals. The email said that I should have included a message instead of just attaching the referee resume.

Now I’m a person that’s easy to talk to. When I’m reprimanded, or told what I did wrong or incorrectly, or simply instructed, these are okay with me. In fact these are good things because I’m willing to learn and improve.

But I was bothered by this because it isn’t my first time to refer a job applicant. The first time I referred was in December. I referred an old friend, who is now working in our company and doing very well so far in fact. But when I made that email referral, I didn’t get any correction or instruction that I should have included a note blah blah. If what I did was incorrect, why didn’t they correct me the first time I did it? That’s what bothers me. And I have made several referrals after that.

The reason I didn’t include a note is because I followed the exact format in the email format. Followed the format for the email subject, attaching the resume. That’s why there’s no message body. I guess I feel bad because I ‘did not follow proper etiquette’. I think I feel bad because I really put a lot of effort in communication, esp. in making emails whether at work or personally. It seemed like I was discourteous and impolite, and it wasn’t something that I intended.

I haven’t replied to the email. I would like to ask for advice as to what I should say. Should I even reply? Should I simply say 'Sorry, I’ll do better next time"? Or should I explain why I didn’t include a message body? Thanks in advance.
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Does your boss have an open door policy? Would it be possible to drop by their office and express your concerns? I personally wouldn’t sweat it too much, and make sure that they’re done “properly” from now on, but if you’re worried about it it can’t hurt to discuss it with your boss to make sure they know you didn’t intend any discourtesy.
 
fin said:
If what I did was incorrect, why didn’t they correct me the first time I did it? That’s what bothers me. And I have made several referrals after that…
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Different person - new policy - passive/aggressive person who has to wait until they are completely fed-up before they say anything and then reacts inappropriately to minor issues, etc etc the million reasons things go wrong between people.

If you know what they want, give it to them. If you feel like you aren’t sure how to please them, send email back thanking them for their correction and explaining why you don’t know how to fix it. CC your boss who probably could care less about the whole issue and is wondering why he was emailed instead of you directly.

Or just let it all go.
 
This is a matter of company style and overall ‘branding’. If I were in your position I would tell your boss that you think it is a good idea (it is, because it makes your company look both ‘human’ and professional). You might be able to take it further by coming up with a standard template which others could use also: “Traditional Catholic Catering is happy to provide a referral for …]. I have attached it as a pdf(?). If you need to talk further with anyone in TCC, please contact me and i will arrange it”.

Ideas on how to do things better are the fuel of success in any work. Be happy when one comes your way, show it, and more will come along.
 
Advice: let it go. You are making a big deal out of a small matter.
 
fin said:
I haven’t replied to the email. I would like to ask for advice as to what I should say. Should I even reply? Should I simply say 'Sorry, I’ll do better next time"? Or should I explain why I didn’t include a message body? Thanks in advance.
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Did your boss simply forward the email he received from HR or did he write a paragraph of his own expounding on the importance of what HR had said then forwarded it to you?

If your boss simply forwarded it to you or put “FYI” on it and forwarded it to you that means he was slightly annoyed with HR but was letting you know that someone in HR has their panties in a bunch. It’s nothing to worry about but to “humor” HR in the future you need to include a message that tells them who this person is and how you came to have their resume in your inbox.

If your boss added a paragraph of his own telling you “important” HR’s comments were you have a problem. Your boss and HR are both petty fools and that does not bode well for people that don’t suffer fools.
 
Where I work, email wouldn’t be used for a reprimand. It’s for sharing information.

If it’s minor, one gets called to the shop foreman’s office, open-door.
If it’s a big deal, one gets called to the service manager’s office, closed door.
If it might have big repercussions, it’s HR, or Service Director, closed door.

I suspect some HR person is in a bad mood because it’s Valentine’s day and she isn’t getting a card or flowers, so she’s being snippy. The boss just relayed it on so he can honestly say you’ve been told.
 
Wow…

As an HR professional I would say THANK YOU for the referal. I have a few questions. Got a minute?

I certainly wouldn’t do my best to offend you, suggesting that perhaps you keep your referals to yourself. It’s VERY hard to find QUALITY employees.

Someone just showed you their underpants! I wouldn’t be bothered by it. But I’d certainly realize I don’t work for the type of people I THOUGHT I did.
 
E-mail isn’t the best way to share this kind of thing, but people are allowed to change their response to how you do things without meaning their correction as a blanket condemnation of all similar past behavior on your part.

Take it as a “if this is what they want, next time I’ll do that way”, and leave it at that.
 
fin said:
Valentine’s day seemed to be a normal day. So today at work I just got back from lunch and went to my desk. I checked my email to see if anything new came up while I was on break. So read read read. I read an email from my boss. I was rather bothered by it. Apparently, HR informed him that I should observe proper etiquette when it comes to sending email referrals. The email said that I should have included a message instead of just attaching the referee resume.

Now I’m a person that’s easy to talk to. When I’m reprimanded, or told what I did wrong or incorrectly, or simply instructed, these are okay with me. In fact these are good things because I’m willing to learn and improve.

But I was bothered by this because it isn’t my first time to refer a job applicant. The first time I referred was in December. I referred an old friend, who is now working in our company and doing very well so far in fact. But when I made that email referral, I didn’t get any correction or instruction that I should have included a note blah blah. If what I did was incorrect, why didn’t they correct me the first time I did it? That’s what bothers me. And I have made several referrals after that.

The reason I didn’t include a note is because I followed the exact format in the email format. Followed the format for the email subject, attaching the resume. That’s why there’s no message body. I guess I feel bad because I ‘did not follow proper etiquette’. I think I feel bad because I really put a lot of effort in communication, esp. in making emails whether at work or personally. It seemed like I was discourteous and impolite, and it wasn’t something that I intended.

I haven’t replied to the email. I would like to ask for advice as to what I should say. Should I even reply? Should I simply say 'Sorry, I’ll do better next time"? Or should I explain why I didn’t include a message body? Thanks in advance.
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I would just apologize for the improper format, thank them for the correction, and promise to use the proper format next time. Then use the specified format in the future.

It’s odd that they didn’t notify you before and communicated directly to your boss instead of with you, but I would just see it as a chance to be polite and humble. In my experience, it’s better to come across as cooperative than defensive.

Just try to see this as a small, easily fixed thing, rather than a big deal to stress over. God bless you.
 
I would speak directly to your boss. Apologize and state that you did not intend to be impolite and you will do better in the future.
 
I’m sorry, I’m really having a hard time with this… Maybe it’s my mood.

WHY ON EARTH should a person APOLOGIZE for sending a referal??? I mean REALLY??? If you’re going to be rude about it, I’ll go ahead and send the referal to the 3 other companies that are hiring that my other friends are working at. I’m sure they’d like a quality employee who doesn’t need to be reprimanded for doing a good deed!

See If I send you a referal, AND you hire the person… you owe me 20% of their hiring salary. Of course, you’d know that, or you wouldn’t get the referal. If an employee sends you a referal, and it’s a good one, you say THANKS FOR SAVING THE COMPANY20%!

Now, If I’m in HR, and I get an in house referal… and it doesn’t come with any info, I’d probably send another e-mail.

“Hi Sally. Thanks for the referal. Can you take a few minutes to let me know what you know about this person, why you are referring etc.” Otherwise, it will go into the pile of 1000 resumes I get from all the desperate, underqualified, unemployed individuals.

Now “sally” knows her friend doesn’t get looked at unless I’m alerted to them.

Well, now, I guess I AM in a mood! Now, I’ve taken this persons e-mail personally. LOL! This is the reason I got out of HR. Someone sees a very small picture. They feel it’s more important to coach on the etiquette of giving a free gift, than to say THANK YOU! Now “sally” is ticked, and may know some very awesome prospective employees. A future Bill Gates… But this guy will never know. 'Cause he’d like his ego stroked before that introduction!🤷 :eek: He should probably be fired.

Yeah, I’m in a mood all right!
 
Since the other person, the author of that communication you’re referring to, is talking about etiquette, I would mention my concerns with how that e-mail made me feel (unfairly evaluated, accused of discourtousness etc.) in contrast with the fact I was doing my job as best I could in no violation of anything clear, and mention that since the author was mentioning etiquette, I thought it proper to make this observation.

But I’d probably lose my job as a result. There’s a reason why I’m a freelancer. But you might be able to find a way to convey the above message to both your boss and that person who wrote it. Using words such as “respectfully” could help.
 
chevalier said:
Since the other person, the author of that communication you’re referring to, is talking about etiquette, I would mention my concerns with how that e-mail made me feel (unfairly evaluated, accused of discourtousness etc.) in contrast with the fact I was doing my job as best I could in no violation of anything clear, and mention that since the author was mentioning etiquette, I thought it proper to make this observation.

But I’d probably lose my job as a result. There’s a reason why I’m a freelancer.
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👍 I work from home too… for ME!
 
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