Working out, Women's Dress, and Modesty

  • Thread starter Thread starter Victor_Nolan
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
V

Victor_Nolan

Guest
I just started up a gym membership after many years of not regularly working out.
Last time I was consistent with working out would have been around 2000.

I’m not in that great of shape and want to change that.

So I started up at a gym this morning and all I can say is “wow”.

I don’t know if you have these Planet Fitness gyms near you where they show these big hulking men wearing very revealing clothing. And the premise of the commercial is that Planet Fitness doesn’t cater to that mentality.

Well, the gym I go to certainly caters to women dressing very revealing.

Now I’m not a puritan… but my goodness!

I’d say at least 90% of the women there wore clothes that showed every crevice.
Those tight yoga pants are the official uniform apparently.

I struggle with looking at women. I don’t like being that guy. I want to be obedient to God as well as a roll model to my son. But when I’m on a treadmill and every lady in the row in front of me is on display it’s one of the hardest things to just ignore.

I know what I need to do, I just wish it were a bit easier.
 
Victor_Nolan said:
I just started up a gym membership after many years of not regularly working out.
Last time I was consistent with working out would have been around 2000.

I’m not in that great of shape and want to change that.

So I started up at a gym this morning and all I can say is “wow”.

I don’t know if you have these Planet Fitness gyms near you where they show these big hulking men wearing very revealing clothing. And the premise of the commercial is that Planet Fitness doesn’t cater to that mentality.

Well, the gym I go to certainly caters to women dressing very revealing.

Now I’m not a puritan… but my goodness!

I’d say at least 90% of the women there wore clothes that showed every crevice.
Those tight yoga pants are the official uniform apparently.

I struggle with looking at women. I don’t like being that guy. I want to be obedient to God as well as a roll model to my son. But when I’m on a treadmill and every lady in the row in front of me is on display it’s one of the hardest things to just ignore.

I know what I need to do, I just wish it were a bit easier.
Click to expand...
People replying to this thread: the man has asked for ideas on what to do. Let’s take this up a level or two and NOT start in on what women should or shouldn’t wear, okay?

What should you do? First, find out the times that the gym is least busy and try and get your workout in at those times. Next, get on the treadmill or other apparatus and equipment in front row. You’ll avoid having their backside in your direct line of vision . Use your earphones and listen to praise music or prayer while on that equipment. It sound like you are really trying to keep custody of your eyes and that’s excellent because you cannot control what others wear.
 
You might have to find a time to go when it’s not busy. 🤷

I don’t wear tight clothing as a rule, but my workout clothes tend to be tighter than other clothes I wear, because they allow for freer range of motion. I am a runner and I wear compression pants (likely the tight pants you are noticing). It is hard to run in baggy pants or shorts.

I will say I don’t like when people show lots of skin at the gym - men or women. I find it distracting during the summer when men run around on busy streets without a shirt. There’s a lot of good technology in workout clothes these days to help wick sweat away and keep you cool. But the clothes are going to be form fitting. They’re designed that way for function, not for style.
 
LightBound said:
People replying to this thread: the man has asked for ideas on what to do. Let’s take this up a level or two and NOT start in on what women should or shouldn’t wear, okay?

What should you do? First, find out the times that the gym is least busy and try and get your workout in at those times. Next, get on the treadmill or other apparatus and equipment in front row. You’ll avoid having their backside in your direct line of vision . Use your earphones and listen to praise music or prayer while on that equipment. It sound like you are really trying to keep custody of your eyes and that’s excellent because you cannot control what others wear.
Click to expand...
Why can’t it be about what women should or shouldn’t wear as well?
I think that’s a valid concern.

Now, an individual woman can do whatever she’d like to do.
I think there is a growing issue with modesty (or the lack of it) with how many women dress.

I find it odd that you’d immediately try to shunt that part of the conversation off.
 
Victor_Nolan said:
Why can’t it be about what women should or shouldn’t wear as well?
I think that’s a valid concern.

Now, an individual woman can do whatever she’d like to do.
I think there is a growing issue with modesty (or the lack of it) with how many women dress.

I find it odd that you’d immediately try to shunt that part of the conversation off.
Click to expand...
Maybe because you specifically asked for what YOU should do and there are dozens of closed threads in the archives on what people think women should or shouldn’t wear and they never end well…the mods usually have to come in and close them. That’s why I began my repsonse like I did .
 
Victor_Nolan said:
Why can’t it be about what women should or shouldn’t wear as well?
I think that’s a valid concern.

Now, an individual woman can do whatever she’d like to do.
I think there is a growing issue with modesty (or the lack of it) with how many women dress.

I find it odd that you’d immediately try to shunt that part of the conversation off.
Click to expand...
No one is “shunting” anything. It’s just that on CAF, discussions of modesty usually turn into a lot of complaining, arguing and not listening to each other. Those threads are never productive. LightBound’s suggestion (ie that we focus on you and what you can control instead of criticizing people whose action we have no control over) will actual be more helpful to you in your situation . . . unless you are here for the complaining and arguing.

Focus on the positives of what you can do instead of focusing on the negatives of what you want others to do.
 
Actually, from my reading of it, he didn’t ask anything. He said, “I know what I need to do, I just wish it were a bit easier.”

Not saying that suggestions wouldn’t be helpful for others reading the thread, but the original post seemed to me more a comment than a question. 🤷
 
Victor Nolan,

I commend you for attending to the needs of both your body and spirit. 👍 We are created as both body and spirit, and I believe the health of one affects the health of the other.

Pertaining to your body, I urge patience and persistence. Exercise and proper nutrition are integral parts of a healthy LIFEstyle.

Regarding “provocative” dress in some fitness-related environments, I think I very much understand your concerns. I absolutely hate the immodesty and sexual immorality rampant in US society. I am not certain what advice to offer you, as one of the reasons, though not the primary reason, I set up a “gym” at home is to avoid this exact struggle you describe.

ETA
I understand “provocative” is a subjective term, and if I were of not a sinful nature, dress of women I encountered would be irrelevant to my own purity of thought. I am responsible for my thoughts and actions, and no one can make be sin.
 
Gia_B said:
No one is “shunting” anything. It’s just that on CAF, discussions of modesty usually turn into a lot of complaining, arguing and not listening to each other. Those threads are never productive. LightBound’s suggestion (ie that we focus on you and what you can control instead of criticizing people whose action we have no control over) will actual be more helpful to you in your situation . . . unless you are here for the complaining and arguing.

Focus on the positives of what you can do instead of focusing on the negatives of what you want others to do.
Click to expand...
:yup:
 
Victor_Nolan said:
Why can’t it be about what women should or shouldn’t wear as well?
I think that’s a valid concern.

Now, an individual woman can do whatever she’d like to do.
I think there is a growing issue with modesty (or the lack of it) with how many women dress.

I find it odd that you’d immediately try to shunt that part of the conversation off.
Click to expand...
It shouldn’t be able what women wear, because then this thread will descend into insults and complaints. You asked what to do about the problem and LightBound has very good advice.
LightBound said:
People replying to this thread: the man has asked for ideas on what to do. Let’s take this up a level or two and NOT start in on what women should or shouldn’t wear, okay?

What should you do? First, find out the times that the gym is least busy and try and get your workout in at those times. Next, get on the treadmill or other apparatus and equipment in front row. You’ll avoid having their backside in your direct line of vision . Use your earphones and listen to praise music or prayer while on that equipment. It sound like you are really trying to keep custody of your eyes and that’s excellent because you cannot control what others wear.
Click to expand...
👍

Lou
 
CatholicRaven said:
Actually, from my reading of it, he didn’t ask anything. He said, “I know what I need to do, I just wish it were a bit easier.”

Not saying that suggestions wouldn’t be helpful for others reading the thread, but the original post seemed to me more a comment than a question. 🤷
Click to expand...
You are correct. He didn’t directly ask for ideas, but it did seem he might need some in the direction of being able to continue his workouts and avoid the situations he had been encountering, especially with his admission of struggling with looking at women. I noticed he was new to CAF- those of us that have been around even for a year know how modesty threads go and the last thing we need is another one started. He is to be commended for wanting to keep physically fit and to be a good role model for his son. I apologize if I came off in a manner that was crass or condemning, but please, no more modesty threads, I beg you all :gopray:
 
Another idea would be to work out primarily with other men or with your family. Seriously. As stated earlier, most of the women that you see while working out wear such clothes when working out not to draw attention to themselves, but because the clothes are specifically made for exercising, and they feel like the clothes are easier to work out in than other, more modest, clothing. In fact, if you were to ask most of the women there, they probably would feel, due to their sweat, that they weren’t very sexy anyway.
 
Do the workout machines you use have built-in TVs? I’ve seen some like that at gyms–in fact, I remember some where you can even plug your iPod into the machine so that a show you downloaded onto your iPod plays on the screen; very cool, that. (Says someone who loathes working out in no small part because of the boredom factor.)

If they do, could you download a show that you’re really interested in and watch that while working out? As LightBound suggested, doing so in the front row would also probably help. If you’re pretty busy most of the day, then you might even start to think of your workout time less as “oh, @*#%, I have to get on that stupid treadmill while trying to keep my eyes where they belong” and more “ooooh, now I can watch another episode of Mike Rowe/Sherlock/show of choice, how fast can I get to the gym?” Plus, having something interesting to watch makes the time go by faster. Digital downloads of shows range from “free” (does the gym have wifi, and do you have a smart phone or wifi-enabled mp3 player? Netflix/Hulu FTW!) to a dollar or two per episode. You can also rent movies that way.

Even if the gyms aren’t set up like that, do the machines have a slot for your phone/tablet/etc where you could watch a show on the device while running or on an elliptical?
 
Eventually you’ll get used to it.

And as you become focused on your program, you’ll start to tune out distractions.

I hope ‘what you need to do’ doesn’t include quitting. Stick with it
 
Keep in mind we are all God’s children.

They are there to work out, just like you. Taking care of the body God gave them, which is a good way of showing appreciation of that gift God has given us.

Focus on your own routine, particularly sticking with it for at least 3 months until it becomes a habit. It becomes very easy to skip one day, which turns into 3 which turns into— you’ve stopped working out. Again, focus on the why you’re there and your workout goals-- which should be improvement in one form or another each workout. (Increase in strength, endurance, speed etc.)

You’ll find that as you get better you’ll also find that some clothes will work better for you. I run 8 miles and the Under Armor shirts are far less abrasive. As you find things that work for you, than you will become less distracted by how the women look in those clothes and more interested in the why/how those clothes are better for particular types of exercise. Some of it might be-- they could actually be a bit more modest on some of the machines than just shorts, like those where they have to lay down/back but still have leg motion.

Lastly-- I say rosaries while I workout (never have been able to listen to music/wear headphones), easy to close one’s eyes on the stationary bike, or elliptical, or rope machine and pray for whatever intentions are on my mind- offering up the pain/sweat/effort.

BTW- FWIW, I tend to not notice women who are dressed appropriately for what they are doing and working out. I do occasionally tend to notice the folks now who come in, but then seem to just sit/stand around vice working out.
 
Victor_Nolan said:
Why can’t it be about what women should or shouldn’t wear as well?
I think that’s a valid concern.

Now, an individual woman can do whatever she’d like to do.
I think there is a growing issue with modesty (or the lack of it) with how many women dress.

I find it odd that you’d immediately try to shunt that part of the conversation off.
Click to expand...
I think the idea was to keep the conversation on track – that is, on what you need to do. The danger with these threads is that it can descend into blaming women for dressing in appropriate clothing for the activity (tight-fitting workout gear) instead of focusing on the work you need to do to control your own thoughts/responses.
 
AnnArbor said:
I think the idea was to keep the conversation on track – that is, on what you need to do. The danger with these threads is that it can descend into blaming women for dressing in appropriate clothing for the activity (tight-fitting workout gear) instead of focusing on the work you need to do to control your own thoughts/responses.
Click to expand...
And if you don’t believe her, check out some prior modesty threads. shudder :eek: :bigyikes:

Let me summarize for you.

Side A: I can wear whatever I want wherever I want, and it’s your problem if it bothers you! You just have a dirty mind if I walk past you naked in all my Playboy-model-body-glory and you think about sex! Theology of the Body says that I’m giving God glory by walking around naked!

Side B: If I can tell that you’re a woman without looking at your face, you’re causing me to sin, you evil harlot, you! An abbot in Little Nowhere, Persia appointed by Pope Leo III said all good Catholic women should wear burkas!

Wash, rinse, repeat for about fifteen pages until the mods get fed up and shut the whole thing down for reasons I simply cannot imagine. 😉
 
UbiCaritas said:
And if you don’t believe her, check out some prior modesty threads. shudder :eek: :bigyikes:

Let me summarize for you.

Side A: I can wear whatever I want wherever I want, and it’s your problem if it bothers you! You just have a dirty mind if I walk past you naked in all my Playboy-model-body-glory and you think about sex! Theology of the Body says that I’m giving God glory by walking around naked!

Side B: If I can tell that you’re a woman without looking at your face, you’re causing me to sin, you evil harlot, you! An abbot in Little Nowhere, Persia appointed by Pope Leo III said all good Catholic women should wear burkas!

Wash, rinse, repeat for about fifteen pages until the mods get fed up and shut the whole thing down for reasons I simply cannot imagine. 😉
Click to expand...
I believe that sums it up nicely. 🙂
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top