Would you consider this mortal?

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ineedofmercy

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I struggle with Porn addiction
I’m a week clean today but I googled some videos but whenever the video started or I saw something

I looked away and quickly turned off the porn

My head tries to tempt me that I sinned mortally so it would’ve been better to just watch the porn

But I like to think that I somewhat resisted my impulse and maybe I didn’t “fully consent”

I looked away when curiousity got me to google and start videos but I looked away whenever I saw quickly saw things

So maybe it’s venial and I fought it

I want an answer because usually during long strides away from this addiction my scrupulously of thinking I already mortal sinned sends me spiraling back

So would you consider that to be mortal or venial
 
My head tries to tempt me that I sinned mortally so it would’ve been better to just watch the porn
This is key. It’s the kind of hopeless thought that strengthens the temptation. It’s the kind of mind game that makes this a particularly hard cross to bear.

You didn’t actually look at the pornography. You went looking for it, which is placing yourself in the near occasion of sin, but you didn’t actually look at it. On the one hand, looking for it is probably compulsive. On the other hand, you got out before you “went there” so to speak. That’s progress.

But in the end the answer is still the same, you should be seeking the help of a priest and a counselor for these sorts of questions. Asking on here is not going to help you. It will only make matters worse.

You are in my prayers.

-Fr ACEGC
 
I’m going to a holy hour and maybe a retreat and the end one of the month

So I’ll be able to confess there

Part of my brain is tempting to do it because I can just go to confession after in couple days

I’m going to mass today so I hoping the fact that I just searched searched for it but looked away before curiousity got to me in the video
Doesn’t make it that I can’t receive communion

Temptation gets bad the day before church
because the devil doesn’t want in grace for mass i guess

I just want to receive once in grace
If I fail in the days after
Atleast I got receive once
 
Stay away from your computer and phone for a day or two. Find something else to occupy your time. That will help.

Are you talking to a priest and seeking counseling?
 
The task at hand with addictions is to break the thought patterns and the behaviors and the indulgence. There is a reinforcement with each indulgence, so withholding the reinforcement is good to break the pattern, even if a habitual thought and behavior occurs.
 
My parents do not know
I talk to priests when I can

I try to stay away from devices
I wait for my hobbies or something I can do

I just want know if what I did is considered mortal or if it’s venial do to addiction and resisting it

I will confess it at the end on the month regardless
I try not to fully give in to my sin
 
I am making progress against that
I am afraid letting down my accountability partner who is very happy to see me make it a week

Right now I remember some old videos I saw and I googled them out if curiousity getting to me but as they started and I saw things I looked away,Stopped myself from thinking and looking and closed the page

I wouldn’t say that it was mortal sin in my opinion
Though I saw part of it very quickly less than a second seeing it
I looked away and Got it out of my mind

Probably venial but I wanna get a second opinion
 
I already told you, it doesn’t seem mortal. If you’re in doubt, it probably isn’t. But you reallyly need to stop asking about that on here. It’s only going to further the problem. Please get some help from a priest and seek counseling as well. I’m more concerned about your scruples at this point than about whether something is a mortal sin or not.
 
I’ll see a priest soon but only at the Holy Hour

I’m glad it’s probably not tho
 
You need to do more than see a priest in passing. You need to set up an appointment and have a good conversation with a priest about these issues.
 
I know
I will try but I don’t really want to tell
My parents
Or for people to change they way they think of me because I go to counseling
Especially counseling for this

What if my friends parents find out and treat me like a weirdo
 
That’s the anxiety talking. Nobody will think ill of you for going to counseling, any more than they would think you were weird for going to the doctor. Besides, anyone who does think you’re weird for going to counseling isn’t really holding an opinion worthy of your attention. Besides that, it’s not like it’s something you have to advertise to everyone. It’s your business if you go to counseling.
 
I’m worried if might get out
If does many of my friends won’t mind
But since they have younger siblings

I feel like the parents might ignore the fact that this is pretty common
And maybe might not want me around because they know I want porn and such

I know it’s probably anxiety but i am scared to say anything
 
You’re projecting. Get some help.

I’m a priest, I see a counselor for anxiety. Do you think I’m a weirdo?

My parents don’t, my friends don’t, even my superiors have said it is good that I do this. And if anyone did think it was weird, they can stuff it.
 
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