WOW

[Dicerning]

I am not sure if this is the proper place to post but here goes.
A few months ago I went through my list of posts since I became a member. I am amazed at some of the things that I have said in the past and regret deeply some of my responses to peoples posts. Almost all of them have been in this liturgy forum. Over the last several years my life has gone through a transformation.
The last two years and in particular the last year I have become more aware of the world around us and how important all of us are to serve the church.
When I returned back to our church I did so through Scott Hahn and with the encouragement of a very conservatively minded deacon. (this was several years ago). For years I peered at our faith through the lens of a “traditionalist” viewpoint and admit that I was deeply influenced by a very traditional view of our faith. Things have changed a bit and I am continuing to realize the broadness of our faith and the value of many opinions of all of us. More important I have become more aware of the presence of Jesus CHrist in all of us and the importance of love. Our CHurch is rich and beautiful and I know that CHrist wills us all to be one. Each of us here has an opinion and it should be valued.
When I went through my past posts. (all 300 or so of them) I was shocked at some of the things I have said and how horrible I felt in writing them. Some of my posts do not represent who I am today and I shudder at the thought of some of the things I posted on a whim. A few examples were I called my pastor a “modernist” which he is not. In fact I don’t even really know what a modernist is and despise the term now. Also I accused baby boomers of being happy clappy progressives…(whatever progressive means). I am embarrassed that I made such comments to my older siblings of the faith who have made HUGE contributions to our church in a positive way. Lastly I mentioned long ago in a post regarding attending a forum on the catechuminate calling one of the wonderful sisters a feminist nun. I am particularly embarrassed at that one. I shudder at the fact of placing a label on a person who has dedicated their life to service of the church and I should consider all people a gift for me to grow in faith.
I am going to close on the fact that I have been influenced by participating in this forum but have gotten caught up in the spirit of some of the discussions and posted comments that I would never consider posting today. I even saw that in this past week in my recent posts. I am stepping away from CAF not because I think it is a bad thing but because I believe I am at risk of presenting myself in a manner which may be judgmental and unfair towards people I do not know. I desire unit for us all and urge all of us to see the value in where our church is today.
I am in a deacon formation program and I attribute the transformative impact it has had on my life to that formation program. It has truly changed me in a positive way. I simply cannot accept my past opinions and posts as who I am. To put it briefly my ecclesiology has changed quite a bit. I think tradition and progress are essential to every aspect of our faith. God bless all of you and peace.
Dicerning

 

[Leon_Bloy]

Hey, I do not recall noticing anything that I thought was amiss in your posts I may have seen (I have seen your name on the forums here and there), but what you said took enormous humility and courage, so God bless you. If only more of us reflected similarly.

I know, I have felt a strong temptation - and succumbed to it, sometimes - to be a little impatient, “snarky,” know-it-all-ish, etc. on the forums - it is a problem with forums, of course! - so I add my own apologies to anybody I have wrongly offended.

Yes, the Church will endure, the Holy Spirit lives in us, there are difficulties and challenges, some of which we should not tolerate, but we should remember to focus on what the mission of the Church is - to spread the Gospel, to share the mercy and love of Christ (which includes sometimes saying hard things to the culture), and to try to save our own poor souls in the process.

 

[Anniejoe]

Great post, Dicerning. I think we’ve all shown our less attractive side on a forum from time to time. A hot forum discussion can bring out the worst in some of us.

About a year ago, I wrote a letter that I planned to send to various members of my family who had hurt me years ago. I didn’t send it, just kept it. I recently read it again. Not one thing that I had written was true anymore! The Lord has transformed my anger and bitterness over the last year while I have been actively converting.

Thanks for sharing this; it’s great to see how the Lord works in all of our lives if we let Him.

 

[Debora123]

Thank you so much for posting this.

God bless! :clapping:

 

[felsguy]

WOW indeed. Thanks for that really neat post. I couldn’t help but think how appropriate your screen name is (yes, I know it’s mispelled) for you truly have been dicerning (yep, I mispelled it) not only your vocation but your entire faith for these past several years. I pray all of us here remain open to the wondrous power of the Holy Spirit in our own neverending dicernment (one final mispelling) process as you so obviously have been.

 

[joanofarc2008]

Wow what an amazing and humble post. Thank you so much and God bless.