Yearly Eucharist Obligation OUTSIDE the state of Grace?

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BeeSweet

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My husband and I were married by a Justice of the Peace in April 2004 (we eloped), and as yet he’s not been inclined to have our marriage blessed in the Church. To complicate things further, he’s a Methodist, but thankfully he is Baptised. I came back to the Church in April 2005 when we decided to have children.

My question is, since I am not in a state of Grace, what does that do for my obligation to receive the Eucharist during the Easter Season? Am I allowed? I’m hoping this is a moot question, because Hubby is warming up quickly to my practicing the faith, and I anticipate our marriage being blessed around the same time our baby is Baptised. Baby’s due two days after Easter. I’ve already spoken with my priest, and even if our marriage is not blessed at that time, they will allow me to have our baby Baptised.

Thanks be to God for the Sacrament of Reconciliation!
 
BeeSweet!:
My husband and I were married by a Justice of the Peace in April 2004 (we eloped), and as yet he’s not been inclined to have our marriage blessed in the Church. To complicate things further, he’s a Methodist, but thankfully he is Baptised. I came back to the Church in April 2005 when we decided to have children.

My question is, since I am not in a state of Grace, what does that do for my obligation to receive the Eucharist during the Easter Season? Am I allowed? I’m hoping this is a moot question, because Hubby is warming up quickly to my practicing the faith, and I anticipate our marriage being blessed around the same time our baby is Baptised. Baby’s due two days after Easter. I’ve already spoken with my priest, and even if our marriage is not blessed at that time, they will allow me to have our baby Baptised.

Thanks be to God for the Sacrament of Reconciliation!
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You cannot receive Communion in a state of mortal sin at Easter or anytime, and specifically not fullfilling your yearly obligation because you are not in a state of grace is a further mortal sin.
 
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thistle:
…specifically not fullfilling your yearly obligation because you are not in a state of grace is a further mortal sin.
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But if I’m absolved during Reconciliation? I’m not trying to be argumentative, I just want to be sure to do the right thing. My first confession after returning to the Church last year was the day before Divine Mercy Sunday, which confuses me somewhat further. I’m just confused. What of the absolution the priest has given me the times I have confessed since returning to the faith? I’m absolved of all but the sin of marrying outside the church? Ordinarily I do not receive Communion, but I have a few times just after receiving absolution during Reconciliation.

The last thing I want to do is offend the Lord further…
 
BeeSweet!:
But if I’m absolved during Reconciliation? I’m not trying to be argumentative, I just want to be sure to do the right thing. My first confession after returning to the Church last year was the day before Divine Mercy Sunday, which confuses me somewhat further. I’m just confused. What of the absolution the priest has given me the times I have confessed since returning to the faith? I’m absolved of all but the sin of marrying outside the church? Ordinarily I do not receive Communion, but I have a few times just after receiving absolution during Reconciliation.

The last thing I want to do is offend the Lord further…
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Sorry but now I’m confused. Correct me if I am wrong but you seem to be saying that you have been to Confession but deliberately have not confessed the fact that you are married but not in the Catholic Church. Why would you go to Confession and not confess that. You should find out from a priest if that is a mortal sin or not.
 
BeeSweet!:
My husband and I were married by a Justice of the Peace in April 2004 (we eloped), and as yet he’s not been inclined to have our marriage blessed in the Church. To complicate things further, he’s a Methodist, but thankfully he is Baptised. I came back to the Church in April 2005 when we decided to have children.

My question is, since I am not in a state of Grace, what does that do for my obligation to receive the Eucharist during the Easter Season? Am I allowed? I’m hoping this is a moot question, because Hubby is warming up quickly to my practicing the faith, and I anticipate our marriage being blessed around the same time our baby is Baptised. Baby’s due two days after Easter. I’ve already spoken with my priest, and even if our marriage is not blessed at that time, they will allow me to have our baby Baptised.

Thanks be to God for the Sacrament of Reconciliation!
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As a Catholic you are obligated to receive the Eucharist at least once a year during the Easter season. Being possibly in a state of Mortal sin prevents you from meeting this obligation which is objectively another mortal sin. This is why the Church calls all Catholic to reflect, repent and receive the Sacrament of Reconciliation during Lent so that they can receive the Eucharist during the Easter season.
 
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thistle:
Sorry but now I’m confused. Correct me if I am wrong but you seem to be saying that you have been to Confession but deliberately have not confessed the fact that you are married but not in the Catholic Church. Why would you go to Confession and not confess that. You should find out from a priest if that is a mortal sin or not.
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Oh, no no no… I’ve confessed the marriage every time I’ve been to confession, but still I’ve been absolved. This is the big reason for my confusion. I’d get it if I were not absloved, I would certainly not receive. So, what I’ve done is confessed, and received immediately after confession, but then not again until I confess again. I’ve only done this a couple of times.
 
BeeSweet!:
But if I’m absolved during Reconciliation? I’m not trying to be argumentative, I just want to be sure to do the right thing. My first confession after returning to the Church last year was the day before Divine Mercy Sunday, which confuses me somewhat further. I’m just confused. What of the absolution the priest has given me the times I have confessed since returning to the faith? I’m absolved of all but the sin of marrying outside the church? Ordinarily I do not receive Communion, but I have a few times just after receiving absolution during Reconciliation.

The last thing I want to do is offend the Lord further…
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If you intentionally did not repent which would include correcting the Marriage situation (and not living as husband and wife until then) and confess ALL known Mortal sins in prior Confessions then you committed another sin and none of the prior absolutions were of any effect.
 
Br. Rich SFO:
As a Catholic you are obligated to receive the Eucharist at least once a year during the Easter season. Being possibly in a state of Mortal sin prevents you from meeting this obligation which is objectively another mortal sin. This is why the Church calls all Catholic to reflect, repent and receive the Sacrament of Reconciliation during Lent so that they can receive the Eucharist during the Easter season.
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So, then I’m OK to receive as long as I confess immediately before receipt of the Eucharist? I’ll be so glad once our marriage is blessed and I’m allowed to participate fully again.
 
Br. Rich SFO:
If you intentionally did not repent which would include correcting the Marriage situation and confess ALL known Mortal sins in prior Confessions then you committed another sin and none of the prior absolutions were of any effect.
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I don’t believe I’ve intentionally not repented, but I still live with my husband although we have not had our marriage blessed in the Church. I am sorely sorry for all the sins I’ve committed, even those for which I’ve been absloved already. This is why I don’t want to compound the sin further.
 
Br. Rich SFO:
If you intentionally did not repent which would include correcting the Marriage situation (and not living as husband and wife until then) and confess ALL known Mortal sins in prior Confessions then you committed another sin and none of the prior absolutions were of any effect.
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I can not leave my husband, for what it would do to our relationship. He would not understand. I pray for his conversion everyday, and I pray for our marriage to be blessed. I believe God will have this happen soon.
 
Let’s get this clear - if you still live with your partner AND are still having relations with him, then you are in a state of sin. It’s not crystal clear from your OP whether this is the case or not.

If you are still having relations with him, and you confess while still intending to keep on doing so even though you are unmarried in the eyes of the Church, then you don’t have true contrition for the sin. The effect of this is that the absolution would be ineffective, at least in regards to this particular sin.

Confession is not a get out of jail free card - you can’t be absolved if you intend to keep on sinning after you’ve been to confession. I’m surprised this wasn’t explained adequately to you by the priest when you first confessed the sin.
 
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LilyM:
Let’s get this clear - if you still live with your partner AND are still having relations with him, then you are in a state of sin. It’s not crystal clear from your OP whether this is the case or not.

If you are still having relations with him, and you confess while still intending to keep on doing so even though you are unmarried in the eyes of the Church, then you don’t have true contrition for the sin. The effect of this is that the absolution would be ineffective, at least in regards to this particular sin.

Confession is not a get out of jail free card - you can’t be absolved if you intend to keep on sinning after you’ve been to confession. I’m surprised this wasn’t explained adequately to you by the priest when you first confessed the sin.
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Actually, you cannot have one sin not absolved and all the others absolved. It’s all or nothing.

So, if a person is living in an invalid marriage situation, the only way they can confess and receive absolution is to stop committing sin - that means fix the situation by either separating from the invalid spouse, or, with the priests approval, living with the invalid spouse as brother and sister until the marriage is validated.

Deliberately omitting one or more mortal sins in confession results in a) the absolution being invalid and b) the mortal sin of sacrilege being added to the burden of sin.

We can’t play with the Sacraments and not hurt ourselves.
 
BeeSweet!:
My husband and I were married by a Justice of the Peace in April 2004 (we eloped), and as yet he’s not been inclined to have our marriage blessed in the Church. To complicate things further, he’s a Methodist, but thankfully he is Baptised. I came back to the Church in April 2005 when we decided to have children.

My question is, since I am not in a state of Grace, what does that do for my obligation to receive the Eucharist during the Easter Season? Am I allowed? Thanks be to God for the Sacrament of Reconciliation!
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Fr Serpa just answered a similar question on a similar situation in AAA.
 
Joan M:
Actually, you cannot have one sin not absolved and all the others absolved. It’s all or nothing.
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Thanks for the clarification. I thought as much, but wasn’t entirely certain.
 
What is AAA? I’m still confused. I’ll probably need to talk with my priest. The last I spoke with him, I was only concerned with having the baby Baptised, and worried my invalid marriage would prevent my doing so. I didn’t think to ask about the Easter Eucharist obligation at the time.
 
The bottom line is this-

Your marriage outside of the Church was a mortal sin.

You CANNOT receive Holy Communion or get a valid absolution in Confession unless you repent on marrying your now husband outside the Church.

I have a brother who is in the same situation as you.

#1 What you have to do, in order to make your way back to the Church is to first stop having sexual relations with your husband until your “marriage” is sacramentalized.

#2 Then after that is successful and you are absolutely serious on witholding the marital act from him until your marriage is sacramentalized you can go to confession and receive a true absolution. The fact you have been to confession so many times makes no difference- every single one of them was invalid unless you have decided on #1 above.

Unless you do #1 above and #2 (God will know in your heart if you will “sleep on the couch” until your marriage is sacramentalized) you cannot even go to Confession or Holy Communion. Your confession must be sincere not to have sexual relations with your “husband” until after your marriage is “sacramentalized.”

Ken
 
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kleary:
The bottom line is this-

Your marriage outside of the Church was a mortal sin.

You CANNOT receive Holy Communion or get a valid absolution in Confession unless you repent on marrying your now husband outside the Church.

I have a brother who is in the same situation as you.

#1 What you have to do, in order to make your way back to the Church is to first stop having sexual relations with your husband until your “marriage” is sacramentalized.

#2 Then after that is successful and you are absolutely serious on witholding the marital act from him until your marriage is sacramentalized you can go to confession and receive a true absolution. The fact you have been to confession so many times makes no difference- every single one of them was invalid unless you have decided on #1 above.

Unless you do #1 above and #2 (God will know in your heart if you will “sleep on the couch” until your marriage is sacramentalized) you cannot even go to Confession or Holy Communion. Your confession must be sincere not to have sexual relations with your “husband” until after your marriage is “sacramentalized.”

Ken
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OK, that sounds fair enough. I still feel I need to speak with my priest. I doubt he’ll tell me differently since I’ll be specifically asking the question. Maybe they didn’t say anything before because they didn’t want to scare me away from returning to the faith. It didn’t even cross my mind that the JP marriage would cause a problem with the Church when we decided to elope.
 
Were my husband to know all this though, it would cause a HUGE problem. He does not understand all of this. Well, then again I’m very confused too, but he would condemn the Church’s views.
 
BeeSweet!:
OK, that sounds fair enough. I still feel I need to speak with my priest. I doubt he’ll tell me differently since I’ll be specifically asking the question. Maybe they didn’t say anything before because they didn’t want to scare me away from returning to the faith. It didn’t even cross my mind that the JP marriage would cause a problem with the Church when we decided to elope.
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Your actual confession of course does not have to be disclosed to us but when you have confessed in the past about your invalid marriage did you tell the priest that you intended to carry on having a sexual relationship with your husband. If you did I can’t see how the priest would have given absolution because as other posters have pointed out continuing sexual relations means you have not repented and continue to live in mortal sin.
 
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