1) Seating of families (or Seating of the Mothers, but this is often extended for step-parents, grandparents, etc): first groom’s family, groom’s mom last, then bride’s family. Bride’s mom is seated as last thing before wedding begins. This is not Catholic, but plain old tradiotional wedding custom.
2) Processional: the traditional procession is both bride and groom process together. There is a lot of symbology about this being your (plural) day, a day you enter together, coming together to God’s alter to make your vows, etc. However, because of the prominence of the rather modern concept of this being the “Bride’s” day, many churches allow the now common Bridal march. The symbology being that it is all about her and her big day and everyone look at her, etc. The bridal marches (both versions) have a huge history attached to it that you should look up some time. It is banned in many places.
Also, while a bride’s father might escort her down the aisle, he does not give her away in a Catholic wedding. He simply walks her down, maybe kisses her cheek or shakes the groom’s hand, then goes to his seat. The bride and groom will later be asked if they give themselves freely and without reservation.
3) Statement of Intentions: this is where the aforementioned questions from the priest to the couple happens.
4) Reception of Consent: This is when the two are officially and actually married. Not at the end of Mass, but after they accept the vows here. “I do” is not the traditional response as it is preferred that you say the vows yourself. However, the US does allow the priest to say them for you, with you responding “I will” or “I do.”
5) Prayer of the Couple: this is optional and often left out. But any kind of customization you want to do, if the priest is open to it, best fits in here. Notice it is during the Rite of Marriage but after the vows. We had a special blessing on our hands here.
6) Sign of Peace: well after the vows and well before the end of Mass, this is the place most new couples have their first kiss. Because of the placement, it is not exactly the showy display like in the movies with “You may kiss the bride” but is more subtle and loving.
7) Communion: Of course, in a Catholic Mass, only Catholics may take communion. It isn’t an accident that the first act a newly married couple makes is to take communion together. (Or to pray together, then take communion together.) The double dose of sacramental grace makes it a jam-packed day worthy of such joy and celebration! Many don’t keep the focus on the spirituality of the day, unfortunately.
8) Meditation: (As in the meditative music after Communion) This is also optional. Many do flowers for Mary here. The priests who allow unity candles, or unity sand, or whatever other such unity things there are now, often put them here.
I know there will always be exceptions to every rule (I’ve heard several people tell me their fully Catholic wedding had a “Who gives this woman” line, for example) but I hope this might help clarify the differences between what we think a wedding is like and how it really is. Pretty much, you are having a Mass with a Marriage Rite in the middle of it. As long as you keep thinking of it in that context, you shouldn’t have a problem.
