Young girls wearing revealing clothes to church

[KCtheMommy]

Hmmmm…our parish has more of an issue with out-doing each other financialy/social status by the brand purse they carry. I have not seen an inappropriately dressed child, or teen, as you have described.

BUT my church has a not one but two schools attached.

Low rider jeans, yes. But with long tunics, etc. No problem.

I would be distracted too.

 

[fyrehardt]

My oldest here is 11. This dress was made by her aunt. If I let her wear it to Mass, it will be the only sleeveless dress she wears to Mass.

http://i109.photobucket.com/albums/n50/dranzal/February08327.jpg

I think those dresses are gorgeous. I want one I’m a 28 year old who usually wears long skirts and modest shirts for comfort. I have Never understood how “girls” can be comfy in spaghetti straps and heels and short skirts…straps fall down, heels are bad for your feet, short skirts ride up…it just seems like so much work when I know I can look just as good in modest clothes…

 

[Living4Him]

This is one of the main attractions I have to the traditional latin mass(Well, that & the reverence). All the women are dressed modestly at the TLM. It makes me mad when I see women dressed immodestly at Church(seen at non-TLM) because I know it might be tempting some of the men to sin. Can’t the poor guys get a reprieve at least at Church?

 

[erimau]

There are a couple of thirteen or fourteen year old girls who frequent my church with their parents who I believe are deliberately teasing the men. They sit together and wear clothes similar to the ones described above. Actually, their skirts aren’t quite as short - but they’re not far off. The main problem is that they’re made of this luminous cotton or something which, I am not kidding, is actually see through.

Last week one of them was wearing a yellow top which was almost see through. You couldn’t see through it, but the outline of what was underneath was clearly prounounced. Suffice to say she wasn’t wearing anything under the tanktop.

These girls are beautiful reflections of our Christ and very tanned, so they sit there while the poor men find it so hard not to look at their legs, especially when they are seated and their skirts ride up.

The reason I know it is deliberate is that the very first time I spotted them, in December, the other girl was actually massaging her leg. Just rubbing it.

I have been torn on whether to say something to the priest! These children are practically naked!

To be honest, I am afraid to draw attention to it, in case people collar me for being perverted or something.

Any advice?

I also saw a piece about this on tv a few years ago, and one parent said: “we wear the same clothes to church that we wear to the ball game or to a barbecue…”

 

[sanctamaria17]

But that’s the issue right there. Mass isn’t a ball game or barbecue.

 

[mholoth]

hold on while I drag my soap box from the closet…OK, I’m ready
IMHO
I am glad that kids come to mass please don’t get that wrong but I am pretty strict with my teenage girls as to what is appropriate for church. We have had numerous discussions about it and as teenagers they are pretty good at debating the issues. Because I was having difficulty holding my own I went to my pastor at the time (we used to be Lutheran) and asked him about it. It was a jeans issue. His reply was that we are approaching the ALTAR, where CHRIST is. You should dress the way you would if you were going to meet Christ in person as that is just what you are doing. He also reminded us that prior to Christ’s crucifixion a rope was tied to the high priest (who went into the Holy of Holys only once a year) so that if he was unworthy and was struck dead in the Holy of Holys his body could be retrieved as no one but the high priest could enter. Christ was the one who died in order to grant us this honor of even approaching the altar ourselves personally. Let alone to receive Christ in the Eucharist. He also told us that is why we bow (again Lutheran) at the altar before kneeling to receive the Eucharist and after rising to show respect and honor Christ and His presence and in thanksgiving for the honor to be able to approach.

I have since had this debate numerous times with the girls and I always go back to that advice. Once it was a chaplain’s comment that started it. DD1 had an activity downtown near our church before church so she met us there and I was bringing the ‘church clothes’ with me, so she was standing outside waiting for me (in a black concert Tshirt and ripped up jeans) and he told her to come on in and she said ‘no way my mom would kill me.’ His reply was that God doesn’t care what you wear. I am glad that she understands how serious I am on the issue but it sparked a whole 'nother debate on the issue.

Now if it is an affordability issue for the families it would be different. But then again I hardly think that those designer strips of material are on the bargain rack.

As far as make up–I think it should always, always look natural. Looking polished is way different than looking like a streetwalker.

dragging soap box back to it’s place…

 

[hasikelee]

My husband and I noticed some young girls wearing extremely revealing clothes to church. One girl who looked about 12 years old was wearing the following:
Full make up with red lipstick and big hair
spaghetti strap tight t-shirt
very short, short skirt- it bearly covered her behind and if she bent over, forget it
thigh high rainbow colored sox
platform red shoes

She went up to Communion and it was hard not to look. Her father was standing behind her. There were at least 6 other young girls that were dressed in a similar manner. I try not to pay attention but at times it is difficult… especially the one that I described above.

Every Sunday, I watch these young girls (11-13 years old) wearing tight, short outfits and full scale make-up like they are going to a bar. And it isn’t even the high school girls that are doing it… it is little girls. What is going on? Where are the parents? Anyone else have the same problem in their parish?

After slogans, that is seriously the most distracting thing to me. I can’t stand kneeling in prayer and opening my eyes to see someone’s crack hanging out because they wanted to wear super low jeans with a tube top to Mass.

And it’s 10 degrees outside!!!



So, I don’t know if it’s our location or what, but how come all these girls who wear about 2 sq inches of fabric happen to be the unattractive ones? I don’t need to see it!

 

[mom4truth]

Frankly, I think it’s the parents’ fault for allowing their children to go out like that. I have seen this kind of dress MANY times. More than I care to remember. I find it absolutely disrespectful of the Mass, of others, and of the kids themselves! Parents just don’t step up to the plate. They need to get a backbone and not give in to today’s culture of “sin” and “lust”. That’s my opinion.

 

[stringbeanduck]

Tell me about it.After Mass I saw this one girl. Probably my age(15) wearing the shortness pants I ever saw(if they were pants). The rest of the outfit looked reveling too. You think she work nights downtown or something. The picture above of that 11yr old is fine. Its not revealing. Looks normal to me.

 

[chevalier]

Someone needs to inform those girls.

The problem is not that they go to church for fishing. I don’t think they do.

For that matter, I don’t think they intend any disrespect. In fact, I suppose they don’t.

I think they think dressing the way you describe is basically a part of dressing up.

As for the bar comparison, going to a bar in a skirt that would ride up easily is not exactly what a Catholic lady should do either. Call me a prude, but I just don’t like when women dress or behave in a way which suggests accessibility and flightiness. Perhaps I’m just a wet blanket and a bore, though. I’m definitely somewhat jaded and prejudiced in this regard.

 

[mom4truth]

chevalier:

I wouldn’t be a bit at all suprised if these girls go “fishing” even at Mass. I look at them and see them flicking their hair around and looking around as if to say: “anybody watching me?” I don’t think they’re focusing on the Mass at all. AND - I do not think you’re a prude. I think our culture has produced a youth of indecency and blatant sexuality. It’s sick, really. I think these parents better get on board with the Church. I imagine they’re probably not even totally “with” the Church if they make such allowances for their kids’ behavior. Our parish pastor has spoken about dressing badly. He made a point to say it’s a no-no. It’s still going on, but at least he said it!

 

[SeekerJen]

So, I don’t know if it’s our location or what, but how come all these girls who wear about 2 sq inches of fabric happen to be the unattractive ones? I don’t need to see it!

Would it be better if they looked like men’s magazine models? IMO trashy and inappropriate is such whether the girl is conventionally attractive or not.

My big gripe is about those skirts that look like they would be better as wide belts- the ones that no girl could safely bend over or even sit in, because they’re about 12 inches long. I don’t understand that look, and I am at a loss as to why parents would let their girls out of the house in those.

 

[Miserissima]

This thread has me so spun up (in a good way. I promise) that I will reply later.

 

[Jeanne_dArc]

chevalier:

I wouldn’t be a bit at all suprised if these girls go “fishing” even at Mass. I look at them and see them flicking their hair around and looking around as if to say: “anybody watching me?” I don’t think they’re focusing on the Mass at all. AND - I do not think you’re a prude. I think our culture has produced a youth of indecency and blatant sexuality. It’s sick, really. I think these parents better get on board with the Church. I imagine they’re probably not even totally “with” the Church if they make such allowances for their kids’ behavior. Our parish pastor has spoken about dressing badly. He made a point to say it’s a no-no. It’s still going on, but at least he said it!

I really would have to say that I’m pretty sure that 98% of the time immodestly dressed girls are not “fishing” at mass. While I dress modestly now, when I was 14 or 15 I didn’t dress very modestly (although I usually dressed a bit more modest for mass.) I know that for me, it was not really about getting attention from guys, but more about being like my friends and being fashionable. I really was clueless that it might be distracting to anyone. Most of them probably don’t know better. (Although there are exceptions.)

 

[hasikelee]

Would it be better if they looked like men’s magazine models? IMO trashy and inappropriate is such whether the girl is conventionally attractive or not.

My big gripe is about those skirts that look like they would be better as wide belts- the ones that no girl could safely bend over or even sit in, because they’re about 12 inches long. I don’t understand that look, and I am at a loss as to why parents would let their girls out of the house in those.

We’re talking about pre-teens and very young teens, so I doubt many of them will be the airbrushed model of a magazine.

That being said, yes, it would be nicer if they had the body type to go with the choice of clothing.

Not all clothes look attractive or even right on all body types. Maybe these girls are insecure? I dunno.

 

[SeekerJen]

We’re talking about pre-teens and very young teens, so I doubt many of them will be the airbrushed model of a magazine.

That being said, yes, it would be nicer if they had the body type to go with the choice of clothing.

Not all clothes look attractive or even right on all body types. Maybe these girls are insecure? I dunno.

Yeah…still not understanding why it would be nicer. A 13-year-old in a tight top and plumber-crack jeans is completely inappropriate whether she’s still built like a child or whether she’s got D cup breasts and hips to match (as I did). I actually think it’s worse if she’s got a figure, because then men will assume she’s older and treat her as such.

And yes, I think those girls are insecure, are falling prey to peer pressure, and have parents who won’t do their parental duties.

 

[mom4truth]

I beg to differ about our young girls not knowing that they are causing a “distraction” and inviting glances. I think they know exactly what they’re doing. While this may have been the stance in my day (70’s/80’s), I believe it is the norm today. Our young people have gotten much more worldly than in my day. It’s really disgusting. That’s my opinion on the subject, and I’ve witnessed/heard this behavior first-hand. I imagine there are some girls who do not fit this image. Thank God!

 

[hasikelee]

Yeah…still not understanding why it would be nicer. A 13-year-old in a tight top and plumber-crack jeans is completely inappropriate whether she’s still built like a child or whether she’s got D cup breasts and hips to match (as I did). I actually think it’s worse if she’s got a figure, because then men will assume she’s older and treat her as such.

And yes, I think those girls are insecure, are falling prey to peer pressure, and have parents who won’t do their parental duties.

Well, your post explains why you can’t understand it. I stated they were “unattractive” and you take the opposite to mean D cups and hips to match.

I find that unattractive.

 

[SeekerJen]

Well, your post explains why you can’t understand it. I stated they were “unattractive” and you take the opposite to mean D cups and hips to match.

I find that unattractive.

Gee, thanks.

 

[hasikelee]

Gee, thanks.

sigh I never get off on the right foot with you on these threads.


Hopefully this doesn’t dig me deeper, but I was trying to point out that a 13yo with D-cups wearing a tube top is more distracting than, say, a flat-chested 13yo. It’s unattractive, IMO, for a very young teen be flaunting her attributes. I’m not even referencing sexuality here, although I’m sure an argument could be made for that as well.