Your daughter is having an abortion

[CatholicUK]

I work with a group of women who have had abortions (for various reasons). We offer counselling as well as other practical services.

Some of the women that come to the group are very distressed.
I should probably add, that the groups is not for women who are distressed because they have had an abortion.

It is for women who have suffered verbal abuse, physical abuse, emotional abuse etc from the ‘religious communities’ (family, friends, Priests etc) because they have had an abortion.

I am very aware of the proposal that they are actually misplacing their distress about their abortions, and certainly this is the case with a few. (When this is the case we refer the women to a different group, that helps them discover and discuss those feelings.)

However, most are certain that they made the right decision, but have received terrible treatment from others because of their religious views. Even the group itself has been targeted - we now meet privately
1.due to the further abuse women received when coming to the meeting,
2.due to the two arson attacks on the community centres we met in,
3. due to the attempt to inject ME with acid “So you can feel what they do to the babies”, 4. due to them being publicly ‘outed’ as babykillers (often with posters/leaflets) to family, friends and wider society.

One of the main ironies of my job is that concern about the psychological and emotion consequences of abortion upon the woman is often cited as a reason for disagreeing with abortion.

Perhaps people should stop and look at their own behaviour towards the woman AFTER she has had an abortion, because in those circumstances it is nothing but an attempt to punish.

 

[ryecroft]

I work with a group of women who have had abortions (for various reasons). We offer counselling as well as other practical services.

Some of the women that come to the group are very distressed.
I should probably add, that the groups is not for women who are distressed because they have had an abortion.

It is for women who have suffered verbal abuse, physical abuse, emotional abuse etc from the ‘religious communities’ (family, friends, Priests etc) because they have had an abortion.

I am very aware of the proposal that they are actually misplacing their distress about their abortions, and certainly this is the case with a few. (When this is the case we refer the women to a different group, that helps them discover and discuss those feelings.)

However, most are certain that they made the right decision, but have received terrible treatment from others because of their religious views. Even the group itself has been targeted - we now meet privately
1.due to the further abuse women received when coming to the meeting,
2.due to the two arson attacks on the community centres we met in,
3. due to the attempt to inject ME with acid “So you can feel what they do to the babies”, 4. due to them being publicly ‘outed’ as babykillers (often with posters/leaflets) to family, friends and wider society.

One of the main ironies of my job is that concern about the psychological and emotion consequences of abortion upon the woman is often cited as a reason for disagreeing with abortion.

Perhaps people should stop and look at their own behaviour towards the woman AFTER she has had an abortion, because in those circumstances it is nothing but an attempt to punish.

I have to agree with you wholeheartedly - but I had NO idea there was a group like yours. Thank you for what you are doing - seriously!
God Bless
Rye

 

[lifeisbeautiful]

I work with a group of women who have had abortions (for various reasons). We offer counselling as well as other practical services.

Some of the women that come to the group are very distressed.
I should probably add, that the groups is not for women who are distressed because they have had an abortion.

It is for women who have suffered verbal abuse, physical abuse, emotional abuse etc from the ‘religious communities’ (family, friends, Priests etc) because they have had an abortion.

I am very aware of the proposal that they are actually misplacing their distress about their abortions, and certainly this is the case with a few. (When this is the case we refer the women to a different group, that helps them discover and discuss those feelings.)

However, most are certain that they made the right decision, but have received terrible treatment from others because of their religious views. Even the group itself has been targeted - we now meet privately
1.due to the further abuse women received when coming to the meeting,
2.due to the two arson attacks on the community centres we met in,
3. due to the attempt to inject ME with acid “So you can feel what they do to the babies”, 4. due to them being publicly ‘outed’ as babykillers (often with posters/leaflets) to family, friends and wider society.

One of the main ironies of my job is that concern about the psychological and emotion consequences of abortion upon the woman is often cited as a reason for disagreeing with abortion.

Perhaps people should stop and look at their own behaviour towards the woman AFTER she has had an abortion, because in those circumstances it is nothing but an attempt to punish.

You have raised a good point, before an abortion we should do everything we can to stop it, after an abortion we should be trying to help those involved back to God (in the end we want everyone to be close to God no matter what we have done in the past), seek forgiveness, find peace, have the information and the will to never seek an abortion again etc… I don’t understand how anyone would think that injecting someone else with acid is going to help lower the number of abortions!
With that being said, we still need to be very clear that an abortion is NEVER ok, and so, although it is never ok to abuse women, for any reason, it would not be ok to say abortions are not wrong.
rachelsvineyard.org/index.htm
is a good program that has a loving approach to help people that have been through an abortion, without ignoring what an really abortion is.

 

[twoangels]

The thread about the married daughter on the pill prompted some posters to compare that to a daughter having an abortion which prompted my question: What would you say or do if your adult daughter (or DIL) confided in you that she was going to have an abortion? What do you feel your moral obligation would be? Would you ever be able to fully forgive her?

What if it was because of Down’s Syndrome or for sex selection? What if they didn’t want kids or at least not want one right now/another one?

I would assume that if my daughter confided in me that she was going to have an abortion, that our relationship would be strong enough for us to talk it through. I’d ask her why. I’d offer any support in bringing the pregnancy to term. I’d tell her stories about trusting God and trusting in His providence. I when then pray for her that she would choose not to have an abortion.

I think if my daughter knew me well enough, it’d be an expression that she were open to getting support away from abortion. If she weren’t, I’d expect that she wouldn’t tell me or would only tell me after the fact.

These really ar the sorts of things where children already know your position. It takes a level of trust and a respect for your opinion for them to confide these things before they’ve made their decision.