20 years old and hopeless about life

[therose01]

You are right. I need to get away. It will be quite hard, and I will feel guilty… But I’m sick of being the doormat. And I am financially dependent on my mother… A student loan is possible, but not ideal… Perhaps I could try asking someone in church? I don’t know… Right now I have to study my grades up. So i’ll probably have to live at home until I get the grades in science that are bad to a good level and then can move to another city for studying, but that will also include a loan… Anyhow, therapy is something I will look up, and also talking to someone in church. Maybe it’s possible to talk to a nun also, and of course a pastor.

I used to be a really good student up til I was about 13. Top grades, always loving school, had amazing friends… Then I started switching schools, hung out with people who did not care about school at all, mom got more angry often etc and it was just a downhill… I gave up on myself and started being unhappy more and more.

How do I go on about telling my family I want to cut contact off? Do I just gradually back off? (Tried distancing myself from my mom awhile ago by being more in my room etc and that just made her worse). My dad and I aside from him looking at my body nowadays and the background talk a lot, and as I have mentioned he is old and sick… He mentioned also a few years ago when I brought all of this up about me being uncomfortable when he touched my butt that it was something everyone did and it was normal and not sexual…

 

[Trident_H]

You are right. I need to get away. It will be quite hard, and I will feel guilty… But I’m sick of being the doormat. And I am financially dependent on my mother… A student loan is possible, but not ideal… Perhaps I could try asking someone in church? I don’t know… Right now I have to study my grades up. So i’ll probably have to live at home until I get the grades in science that are bad to a good level and then can move to another city for studying, but that will also include a loan… Anyhow, therapy is something I will look up, and also talking to someone in church. Maybe it’s possible to talk to a nun also, and of course a pastor.

I used to be a really good student up til I was about 13. Top grades, always loving school, had amazing friends… Then I started switching schools, hung out with people who did not care about school at all, mom got more angry often etc and it was just a downhill… I gave up on myself and started being unhappy more and more.

How do I go on about telling my family I want to cut contact off? Do I just gradually back off? (Tried distancing myself from my mom awhile ago by being more in my room etc and that just made her worse). My dad and I aside from him looking at my body nowadays and the background talk a lot, and as I have mentioned he is old and sick… He mentioned also a few years ago when I brought all of this up about me being uncomfortable when he touched my butt that it was something everyone did and it was normal and not sexual…

Don’t warn them. Just do it. When you’ve worked out a plan.

And him touching you is not normal. It’s explainable, yes. But not normal. The evidence? It makes you uncomfortable. And the uncomfortable is rarely the normal.

Peace.

-Trident

 

[1ke]

You are right. I need to get away. It will be quite hard, and I will feel guilty… But I’m sick of being the doormat. And I am financially dependent on my mother… A student loan is possible, but not ideal… Perhaps I could try asking someone in church? I don’t know… Right now I have to study my grades up. So i’ll probably have to live at home until I get the grades in science that are bad to a good level and then can move to another city for studying, but that will also include a loan… Anyhow, therapy is something I will look up, and also talking to someone in church. Maybe it’s possible to talk to a nun also, and of course a pastor.

Take your time and make a plan. Talk to a counselor at school. If you are in college then there is surely a student counselor you can access.

How do I go on about telling my family I want to cut contact off?

With the level of emotional abuse and manipulation they dish out, I suggest you not tell them anything. Do not give them advanced warning or an opportunity to convince you that you are “crazy” and that everything is “normal” or it’s “all in your head”.

When you have the ability to move out, do it. Get a new phone number. Block Facebook and be careful how you interact online so as to keep your location private. Don’t give out personal information. Make any contact you have on your terms, such as sending a letter to your father with no return address or such.

He mentioned also a few years ago when I brought all of this up about me being uncomfortable when he touched my butt that it was something everyone did and it was normal and not sexual…

yes, of course he wants you to think that it is “normal” to fondle you. But, it is not normal for fathers to fondle or ogle their daughters.

 

[Sarcelle]

I agree with the other posters.

You need to get away to heal yourself. It will be hard being alone by yourself. However you need to concentrate on healing yourself. Gradually surround yourself with people who mean you well and not hurt you. Pray for that.

I will be praying for you. This forum is available if you need to get something off your chest.

 

[LaughingBoy1503]

My older brother has always put me down. We have fought almost all our lives. When we were young he would take my head and try to hit it at sharp objects. But siblings fight… But I feel like he was a bit extra. He would always call me stupid, a , and many times threatened me with violence and has hit me quite a few times. We lived mostly with my mom and she didn’t do anything. She just said ‘‘stop!’’ and that was it. She said ‘‘it’s your issues so solve it you two’’. He also looks at my body in inappropriate ways. He will say gross stuff. When we are watching a tv show he will always say ''Oh, wow, she has amazing ti. Look at her big a. She is so se*. I want to … her. ‘’ I’ll ask him to stop and he continues. He knows it makes me uncomfortable yet continues, it’s like he finds it amusing and wants to continue more and more.

I failed in high school. Did a year over because I wanted better grades, ended up not even getting a high school diploma. Which I guess was a result of mild depression because of my life, no talent in the sciencespecialization I was in (I wanted to be a doctor but was horrible in math etc), switching so many schools in middle school (the last one’s science teacher barely showing up thus lack of basis in knowledge in those subjects). My mom,coming from a culture where education is very important, was of course very upset with me. I think that’s why today she is so cold to me, she probably has underlying anger because I am a worthless failure.

Hmm, what else… I have mild social anxiety, I am very shy, barely any friends and the ones I do have will bring me down. Guys don’t pay attention to me, never had a boyfriend or anything.

I don’t know what to do. There’s no point in my life. It’s like I’m so desperate for love and affection. When someone is actually nice to me, I find myself so attached to that person, which I know is pathetic.Why did I have to be this worthless? Growing up I had dreams about life, but now… all is broken. I’m so disappointed in myself and my life. It’s like being stuck in a room and watching everyone else through a window. Most people my age are in the end of their third semester in uni, have boyfriends, loving families, popular, many friends and such. I wish my life was good.

How do you eat a elephant? The answer is one bite at a time…

You have a lot of problems but they can all be solved eventually. You can start by going to adult school and getting your diploma. It is terrible that is seems your parents are no help with how you are feeling, I can relate to that, though not on the same level as you. I would seek a mentor. Maybe find a spiritual director. Do not be mentored by someone your age. 20 is way young and not a lot of 20 year old’s know what the real world and life is really about. I would talk to your priest and tell him your issues and ask him if he knows anyone who can be this mentor for you. Maybe even look for a spiritual director.

I had many problems when I was younger and I still do. I overcame obesity at 16 years old. I use to be over 300lbs but by the time I was 18 I was 180 pounds. Then came drug addiction… I overcame that but it took five years, then alcohol addiction. Took me a few more years to overcome that. I had low self esteem, no high school diploma at the time and never had a girlfriend. I got my diploma when I was about 26 years old and did not actually get a good career until I was 28 and I could never get a girlfriend until I was 29. I still have problems. I still have a hard time getting a woman to give me a chance and go out with me. I have been single for over a year now and only been on 2 dates in that year. I feel like no woman is attracted to me sometimes. I am going to need a operation to get rid of a bunch of loose skin that I still have from when I was so overweight. I have never let a woman see me with my shirt off because of this problem. I just have it in my mind that no woman will want to marry me if they see this deformity. I am saving money for this operation and though I can afford it right now, I want to make sure I still have money left over just in case a emergency happens so I am waiting to save a few thousand more than I need. I was diagnosed with OCD and I suffer from scrupulosity. So I got a spiritual director to help me. The point is we are always going to have a problem in our life. Sometimes a multitude but we solve them one at a time and keep moving foward. Pick one thing you want to accomplish and try it. 20 is still so young.

Remember… you have a bunch of issues right now but they are solvable. And maybe one day when you have a good career and some money saved up you can talk with a psychologist to help you with some of those issues. Or you can look up “Catholic Charities” around your area and maybe they can help you. It is actually called “catholic charities” try calling them and telling them your problems if they have a office around your area" Most important, keep close to God. Let Him be your main reason to continue without despair. I know it is hard. But remember “How do you eat a elephant? One bite at a time” God bless.

 

[Trident_H]

How do you eat a elephant? The answer is one bite at a time…

You have a lot of problems but they can all be solved eventually. You can start by going to adult school and getting your diploma. It is terrible that is seems your parents are no help with how you are feeling, I can relate to that, though not on the same level as you. I would seek a mentor. Maybe find a spiritual director. Do not be mentored by someone your age. 20 is way young and not a lot of 20 year old’s know what the real world and life is really about. I would talk to your priest and tell him your issues and ask him if he knows anyone who can be this mentor for you. Maybe even look for a spiritual director.

I had many problems when I was younger and I still do. I overcame obesity at 16 years old. I use to be over 300lbs but by the time I was 18 I was 180 pounds. Then came drug addiction… I overcame that but it took five years, then alcohol addiction. Took me a few more years to overcome that. I had low self esteem, no high school diploma at the time and never had a girlfriend. I got my diploma when I was about 26 years old and did not actually get a good career until I was 28 and I could never get a girlfriend until I was 29. I still have problems. I still have a hard time getting a woman to give me a chance and go out with me. I have been single for over a year now and only been on 2 dates in that year. I feel like no woman is attracted to me sometimes. I am going to need a operation to get rid of a bunch of loose skin that I still have from when I was so overweight. I have never let a woman see me with my shirt off because of this problem. I just have it in my mind that no woman will want to marry me if they see this deformity. I am saving money for this operation and though I can afford it right now, I want to make sure I still have money left over just in case a emergency happens so I am waiting to save a few thousand more than I need. I was diagnosed with OCD and I suffer from scrupulosity. So I got a spiritual director to help me. The point is we are always going to have a problem in our life. Sometimes a multitude but we solve them one at a time and keep moving foward. Pick one thing you want to accomplish and try it. 20 is still so young.

Remember… you have a bunch of issues right now but they are solvable. And maybe one day when you have a good career and some money saved up you can talk with a psychologist to help you with some of those issues. Or you can look up “Catholic Charities” around your area and maybe they can help you. It is actually called “catholic charities” try calling them and telling them your problems if they have a office around your area" Most important, keep close to God. Let Him be your main reason to continue without despair. I know it is hard. But remember “How do you eat a elephant? One bite at a time” God bless.

Great advice. And you’re an inspiration man. You really are.

 

[therose01]

Thanks again for the good advice. I’m touched by the amount of people who care about this and want to help.

I’ll try to make a plan. It will probably be at least a year before I can move out, but hopefully there will be a way to move out after that. This is all quite hard. To realize that my family does not really love and care for me is heartbreaking… Also, I am a bit afraid of being judged for breaking contact with my family. I have heard guys say sometimes stuff like ‘‘a good girl that you would marry is a girl that…’’ among many things they’ll say ‘‘is close to her family, a familygirl’’. But yeah. I find that often when I am new in a school or anything, other girls don’t want to hang out with me, will give glares, freeze me out etc. I’m not ‘‘cool’’ or beautiful enough to be considered hanging out with… Sometimes in stores or flying, the person selling will literally say hi to the person before me, just glance at me and not say a word, then she will continue to say hi to the person after me. Small things like this make me feel even more like ****. Then it’s like, if my own mom cannot even love me, who can? Am i that unloveable?

Anyway… Thank you all again!

And LaughingBoy1503, thank you for sharing your story. As Trident H said, you are very inspirational!

 

[Trident_H]

Thanks again for the good advice. I’m touched by the amount of people who care about this and want to help.

I’ll try to make a plan. It will probably be at least a year before I can move out, but hopefully there will be a way to move out after that. This is all quite hard. To realize that my family does not really love and care for me is heartbreaking… Also, I am a bit afraid of being judged for breaking contact with my family. I have heard guys say sometimes stuff like ‘‘a good girl that you would marry is a girl that…’’ among many things they’ll say ‘‘is close to her family, a familygirl’’. But yeah. I find that often when I am new in a school or anything, other girls don’t want to hang out with me, will give glares, freeze me out etc. I’m not ‘‘cool’’ or beautiful enough to be considered hanging out with… Sometimes in stores or flying, the person selling will literally say hi to the person before me, just glance at me and not say a word, then she will continue to say hi to the person after me. Small things like this make me feel even more like ****. Then it’s like, if my own mom cannot even love me, who can? Am i that unloveable?

Anyway… Thank you all again!

And LaughingBoy1503, thank you for sharing your story. As Trident H said, you are very inspirational!

Well you just keep us updated. You let us know if you need us. We’re ready for that.

As for how you’re received in life. Well the experience I’ve had in this way is that sometimes you get what you expect to get. I mean imagine 2 people standing in line. One of them’s just in an awesome way. Joyful thoughts. Good vibes. Really on a mission of happy.

Now imagine a person with more of an interior battle. A bit of a struggle pulling them down a bit inside. No straight up peace in the way they stand. Or they way they set their jaw to life. Their eyes are wary. They’re used to getting rejected. Overlooked. Ignored. And it can get personal. It can all be personal.

So which one does a shy person feel more like saying Hi to? Which one does an insecure person feel safe with? Which one does a person without a lot of inner feeling really warm up to? Which one does a guy who’s distracted in his thoughts really notice? And which one would someone who’s socially awkward risk with a greeting?

I mean sometimes the person talking to you is as bruised inside as you are. Sometimes they’re just trying to survive their day. So any cues you give them that steer them towards an uptick will get noticed. Just like any downward pull might make them want to hurry you along.

So if you want positive results with the outside world just step with joy and uplift. What you project you’ll get back. It’s a feedback loop.

And we’re all in it.

Peace therose. Take care of yourself today. And everyday.

-Trident

 

[therose01]

Thank you. That’s most likely the case. Although sometimes I have even tried smiling a lot, only to get a cold “hi” whereas there might be a person near me who looks annoyed and they still get a happy welcoming. But perhaps I, despite the efforts of looking happy, give out unhappy vibes. It’s hard to expect a good treatment when you’re used to being ignored and rejected.

 

[Trident_H]

Thank you. That’s most likely the case. Although sometimes I have even tried smiling a lot, only to get a cold “hi” whereas there might be a person near me who looks annoyed and they still get a happy welcoming. But perhaps I, despite the efforts of looking happy, give out unhappy vibes. It’s hard to expect a good treatment when you’re used to being ignored and rejected.

Yeah. I know. But don’t change just because of a one-off. Just keep driving forward. Because there’s always room for the guy in front of you to be the one who just lost his dog. But that has nothing to do with you.

Just keep going. We’re rooting for you!

 

[therose01]

Sorry for this rant everyone. Thanks. It seems to be the same. After a few days visiting an old friend of mine in another city, I took the train home, my mom picked me up. The whole drive home she barely asked anything about the train. Only talking about herself - she is stressed, she is tired, she went shopping, her foot hurts… As much as I care for her wellbeing it would have been nice to talk a bit about my trip too. It’s so ingrained in me that she won’t listen/be interested in anything I’m saying that I automatically answer short when she finally after a long time asks “so your train trip was good?” “Yes it was nice” “ok, i’m sooo craving…” And it continues. My brother is the same as he’s been, it’s impossible to have a discussion about him about anything because in his mind, he is always right about everything, while I am just stupid according to him. He is atheist and IF I say anything about God, he will try to argue to convince me in his belief that God doesn’t exist, that religious people are stupid. We had an argument about something that happened in our city and everything I say he disregards and then when I get upset he says I’m overly sensitive. I’m never allowed to be upset by my brother or mother. Everything they do wrong to me must be forgiven right sway without an apology because otherwise I am the “sensitive-holding” one. My brother told me he hated me then an hour later pretends like nothing happened. My dad of course stared at my chest for at least 5 seconds when I came there, even though I specifically wore a baggy sweater to avoid that. He heard my brother saying he hated me, yet he doesn’t say anything. If my brother insults me or is aggressive towards me and my mom or dad happens to be there they say nothing at all. But if I talk back at him and tell him to stop in a firm way, they tell me to stop being angry. So sick of this. I cried so much these days. The days visiting my friend were so calming and then coming back to all of this…

 

[Trident_H]

Sorry for this rant everyone. Thanks. It seems to be the same. After a few days visiting an old friend of mine in another city, I took the train home, my mom picked me up. The whole drive home she barely asked anything about the train. Only talking about herself - she is stressed, she is tired, she went shopping, her foot hurts… As much as I care for her wellbeing it would have been nice to talk a bit about my trip too. It’s so ingrained in me that she won’t listen/be interested in anything I’m saying that I automatically answer short when she finally after a long time asks “so your train trip was good?” “Yes it was nice” “ok, i’m sooo craving…” And it continues. My brother is the same as he’s been, it’s impossible to have a discussion about him about anything because in his mind, he is always right about everything, while I am just stupid according to him. He is atheist and IF I say anything about God, he will try to argue to convince me in his belief that God doesn’t exist, that religious people are stupid. We had an argument about something that happened in our city and everything I say he disregards and then when I get upset he says I’m overly sensitive. I’m never allowed to be upset by my brother or mother. Everything they do wrong to me must be forgiven right sway without an apology because otherwise I am the “sensitive-holding” one. My brother told me he hated me then an hour later pretends like nothing happened. My dad of course stared at my chest for at least 5 seconds when I came there, even though I specifically wore a baggy sweater to avoid that. He heard my brother saying he hated me, yet he doesn’t say anything. If my brother insults me or is aggressive towards me and my mom or dad happens to be there they say nothing at all. But if I talk back at him and tell him to stop in a firm way, they tell me to stop being angry. So sick of this. I cried so much these days. The days visiting my friend were so calming and then coming back to all of this…

Keep ranting as you need it rose. We’ll be your outlet. Your support. No questions asked. No problem.

Sorry for your situation. Be hopeful though. As it’s only temporary.

Peace therose. Stay positive. If you can.

-Trident

 

[therose01]

I’m so sorry for writing more, I know I have already recieved wonderful advice.

But lately it has been getting worse. I have no idea why, but my mom has been extra aggressive. Like, anything I do, she throws a tantrum and starts yelling in a crazy way. My dad is currently quite ill, I went to his place, tried to dress as modestly as I can, yet still everytime I went to sit down beside him to help, he stares at my body. I love him but it feels so disgusting. Some days ago he texted me asking what I was doing, I said I’m resting but am feeling a bit depressed and asked what he was doing. He ignored how I felt and said he was watching tv… Maybe I need to stop telling how I feel

 

[Colorad007]

Wow. I am afraid that I don’t have much to say other than this: cling to the Cross of Christ, even to the point of falling asleep clutching a crucifix in bed, and don’t let go. Let Christ hold you when you can’t hold yourself. But perhaps I shouldn’t say that isn’t much, because it is everything, isn’t it?

 

[Colorad007]

And also, seriously, find some normal people to be around. Even if they are a bit older, from church or wherever, you have got to start living a normal life which involves kust being around normal people. Attend Opus Dei events, go to daily Mass, go sit at a cafe for a while and smile at people. Find a spiritual director who can guide you.

 

[therose01]

And also, seriously, find some normal people to be around. Even if they are a bit older, from church or wherever, you have got to start living a normal life which involves kust being around normal people. Attend Opus Dei events, go to daily Mass, go sit at a cafe for a while and smile at people. Find a spiritual director who can guide you.

Thank you. I will try my hardest to do that. It’s just that I feel awkward going to mass alone, being at a cafe alone… I stand out a bit so people recognize me easily and I’m always afraid people will see me as the lonely, wierd girl

 

[3DOCTORS]

Some of the many LIES that victims of abuse are told by their abusers:

• It’s your fault because you are (ugly, stupid, unwanted, fill in whatever their flimsy excuse is)
• The way we treat you is perfectly normal - you are being oversensitive or making things up if you think differently
• Because you are damaged no one will ever love you (they don’t come out and say this, but you pick up on it subconsciously and FEEL damaged)
• We will toss you a few crumbs of “love” on our terms, just enough to keep you hooked in and hoping we will improve, while really we have no intention of changing
• If you point out that something doesn’t feel right, we will yammer at you until you concede that you must have imagined it, or are overreacting. We will continue to do this on a regular basis until you reach the point where you don’t trust your own eyes and ears, feelings and thoughts anymore.
• We will manipulate you.
• We will act like jerks, but you can’t get away with anything.
• You will feel guilty for trying to make a better life for yourself. The guilt will draw you back.
• And so on, and so on.

This is just a partial list. Somehow you need to find someone who will help you build the trust in yourself that you aren’t imagining things. That you don’t deserve to be treated like a piece of garbage. That just because evil is done to you, it’s on the conscience of the evildoer, not a reflection of who you are as a human being.

Also, you need to reawaken your own sense of what is a “red flag” so you don’t end up in a relationship with another abuser. This is extremely important - not repeating the cycle.

I will keep you in my prayers as you embark on this difficult journey. God bless you!

 

[therose01]

Thank you for all your replies. Hi again. I’m sorry, really don’t want to bring anymore negativity here… But after coming home from abroad it’s like my mother is even worse. She didn’t want to celebrate Christmas with us (only with her boyfriend), then after a while she decided to spend half christmas with us, and then in the day go spend it with him, and wanted to spend easter alone with him aswell. A while ago I said to her I was a bit hurt by this and that it almost felt like he wanted her not to be with us so much. She got so mad at me, said I didn’t want her to find love, that I want her to be alone, that I should’nt need her love now that I’m 20. I told her that was not true, I want her to find love I just wish we could celebrate the holidays all together, and that my friends mother is still loving towards her even though she is 20… She said well your friend is clearly childish, which she is really not, she is studying at a great university and doing really well. I asked my mom yesterday can you please buy some fruits? She said absolutely not, if you are going to come with these stupid requirements you better pay me money every month. I mean it was just fruits… Also, she has always, my whole life, said we can live at home as long as we study. But now she is saying Nope I will move in with him and he doesn’t want you to live her, we want to live alone so you have to move out soon. She only asks me how I am or how my day was when she is with her boyfriend…
It’s sad… First I got her texts how are you? When I was abroad, and I got so wishful, thinking oh yes finally, she cares about me, we can have a good relationship… Then I noticed a pattern, that this was only done when she was with her boyfriend(he always looks at her texts, hes kinda jealous). But when she was alone, nothing… she can be nice at times, but it’s always temporary and always on her terms… I can’t talk about myself or what I feel like because she will just answer shortly and start talking about herself or simply ignore me while talking about what she wants. Then if I question why she ignores me she says “i don’t want to talk about that stuff!” I say then why don’t you just say so instead of just talking over me, it hurts. I get that I’m sensitive, I’m not expecting her to hug me or anything, that hope is dead. It’s just a yearning for motherly love in my heart that I can’t get away… If she was just distant, maybe I could live with that even if it hurt. But she can be so neglecting, manipulative, turn everything around to make me look bad as soon as I say anything saddens me. I get it - she doesn’t want me as a daughter, but then why the need to control my life? She wants to control where I live, my opinions, my emotions… If i even mention studying abroad for longterm she says “okay.” At first, then… “You know, times ticking for you, you don’t have forever to get married and have babies.” “You know… That loan that you’re gokng to take is gonna suck” etc. Anyway… I have realized maybe I deserve this. She always says I was a stubborn child that never listened and always wanted it my way. But I was a child how could I have known? I talk back a lot when she hurts me, maybe I should just be quiet like a “good girl”. Two times I told her I hated her in my teens. It was awful of me, I know… But it came from a place of deep sorrow, which doesn’t excuse it. The first time was after a summer when she was extra mean to me, as in - calling me a dumbass for forgetting to do the dishes, saying she wished she had aborted me, yelling extremely much, and in one yelling game I said I hate you, she replied i hate you too. The other one was some years later in another fight. She was yelling at me for something small and was really angry, yelling in my face, following me around the house yelling in my face when
i was trying to escape and i yelled I hate you while crying. I later apologized and said I love you I’m really sorry for saying that. Anyway. I probably deserve her despise for me, I didn’t become successful like she wished… Still, compared to a lot of other teens in this city - i never smoked, didn’t go to a party until I was 18 and even since then I have maybe went to two, never slept with anyone, was never out late… I respected her, I wrote her cards so many times from school saying i love you mum you are the best. My dad has kept all of his but I’m quite sure my mom threw them away… I feel so wierd for even being this way. Most people my age are mature and on good terms with their parents. I was recently at a friends house, and seeing her mother with her was so lovely… No tension, her mother just joking with my friend, laughing genuinly, you could just tell she really loved her. Yesterday I quit work really late and asked if she could please pick me up st the station (it’s a 10 minute drive), because there were a lot of scary men on the tube for some reason and I didn’t feel safe taking the bus home alone (someone could follow in and just go off at my station which is by the woods so not optional when it’s dark). She just said Nope. Take the bus. I said please mum I’m scared. No. Take the bus. Thats when i realized she doesn’t care about me at all. At
All… I just went home and cried for hours, because it was like
Wow, this is never gonna change. Can someone please give an honest (name removed by moderator)ut?

 

[therose01]

Sorry for the long rant above, and I promise I won’t keep ranting like this… I just need some catholic final advice on what to do and if I am at fault here.

 

[Trident_H]

Sorry for the long rant above, and I promise I won’t keep ranting like this… I just need some catholic final advice on what to do and if I am at fault here.

You’re not at fault as far and as deep as I can see. Please keep venting Rose. Don’t give up this outlet if you need it.

I’m here for you if you need someone to talk to. I wish I could find a way to ease you out of this awful fix. I wish there was a way to wake your mother up to your real pain here. But it seems like she’s something of a case. It seems like she’s maybe even lost all real feeling.

Peace rose. I sort of understand what you’re dealing with here. :hug3:

-Trident