A question for those of you whom are married

[dedo]

We try to attend a service together, weekly if possible.

If we cannot go together, then we try and watch a service on t.v. together or listen to a CD together on a trip.

My wife is Protestant so we like to watch / listen to Joel Osteen or Joyce Meyer.

Although Catholics must go to Mass every week, Protestants can substitute Mass for their service.

If I am trying to make it to Protestant service on Sunday, then I try to go to Mass on the Saturday vigil.

 

[MJJean]

Thank you both…prayers are always welcomed.

Jean…the idea of “rising to the challenge” is something that people don’t often think about and, as married couples - even young - it’s something that at least should be touched on (IMHO).
The kind of deep mutual love that spouses have - the agape type love - should cause each to want to not be a burden to the other and for each to feel that the other could never be a burden.

It might sound strange, but I think that one question that should be asked at pre-cana is this…“Are you willing to change the other’s diaper”?
Like I say - this sounds strange but it starts a whole line of thinking about what you are truly committing to in marriage.

lastly - and I cannot really explain this too well…but there are a whole host of blessings and graces that come to a caregiver who is open to them. I’ve learned more about love, humility, patience and perseverance in the time I’ve cared for my Dear Wife than in all the rest of my nearly 60 years of living.
I wouldn’t wish this journey on others - but would I do it again??? Absolutely!!!

Peace
James

I totally agree! Any couple considering marriage and even couples who are already married should have that discussion. Hey, stuff happens and there is a lot more to committing to marriage than most people realize. We tell people to discuss religion, finances, where you’d want to live, supporting a spouse in their career and education, how you’ll raise the children and on and on. Very rarely does anyone say “What if one of you is stricken with a disease or has a catastrophic accident and needs care?”

I cared for my mother as she was disabled from birth. I did the usual assistance with dressing, medications, toilet, bathing, etc from a very young age. One of my first memories was learning how to clean post-surgical wounds from my mom’s spinal surgery. I don’t regret a minute of my “lost childhood” or the time as an adult I went to her home to care for her when the siblings and step dad were at school or at work I don’t feel like I lost anything! I learned so much both practical and of the heart and soul. I feel blessed to have been able to do that for my mom and to have spent the time with her that I did before she passed.

With my family history, I would likely be the spouse needing care and I wanted to make sure my husband understood that as much as he possibly could without having experienced it. I also wanted to reassure him that I would care for him if he should be stricken with a disease or the victim of an accident. When we married, he squeezed my hand during the “in sickness and in health”. I nearly cried.

 

[paseo]

We try to attend a service together, weekly if possible.

If we cannot go together, then we try and watch a service on t.v. together or listen to a CD together on a trip.

My wife is Protestant so we like to watch / listen to Joel Osteen or Joyce Meyer.

Although Catholics must go to Mass every week, Protestants can substitute Mass for their service.

If I am trying to make it to Protestant service on Sunday, then I try to go to Mass on the Saturday vigil.

Hi dedo,
Thank you for taking the time to share!

God bless you and your family

 

[Serap]

Hi everyone
I was wondering if any married CAF members could share some of their insight and experience on what things you do together with your spouse in building and strengthening your relationship with God. Do you pray together, discuss church teachings, etc? Also, how different, if it is of course, is your walk with God from when you were still single?

Thank you for your responses and God bless!
Theresia

Show your spouse God’s love through your actions in your marriage.

 

[kmcarl56]

Hi kmcarl56,
Thank you so much for taking the time to respond and share your video. It was so beautiful In your post you’re sharing your insight, but I also sensed a sort of encouragement coming from it!

Thank you again and may God bless you on your journey

Of course I was hoping to give you encouragement! The beauty of marriage is the great love you feel for someone, and the great love you receive in return for that love.

It is never judgemental, never condemning, never hostile.

It is always loving, caring, compassionate, considerate, respectful, forgiving, and honorable.

Of course, let’s be realistic, there are times of discord in marriage, but God brings those times to a quick resolution, usually involving an agreement to disagree.

Love reigns over all.

 

[paseo]

Of course I was hoping to give you encouragement! The beauty of marriage is the great love you feel for someone, and the great love you receive in return for that love.

It is never judgemental, never condemning, never hostile.

It is always loving, caring, compassionate, considerate, respectful, forgiving, and honorable.

Of course, let’s be realistic, there are times of discord in marriage, but God brings those times to a quick resolution, usually involving an agreement to disagree.

Love reigns over all.

Thank you kmcarl56

 

[GenosFutureWife]

My husband believes that my emotions are one of his top priorities. If I am sad, crying, happy, etc. He stops everything to be present to what I am feeling. He confesses that it is hard for him to watch me crying because he wants to fix it but he refrains from trying to fix it and just listens, hugs, etc. If for some reason I am feeling “needy” he tries to give me what I need, usually a long hug or a moment to snuggle. Because he does this, I find that I am rarely “needy.”

We are so blessed!

This is so beautiful! What I want / need if/when I get married.