Alcohol

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Ok, I’ll go out on a limb here… 😉

I am an alcoholic. I started drinking wine at night to “calm down” or “relax”. It worked. I didn’t plan on being an alcoholic. That was never my intention. I went to a Priest who is in recovery and talked at length to him. He determined I wasn’t and I went on with my life.

Fast forward 6 years and I was in detox, treatment, and a halfway house. I nearly lost my husband and family and everything good in my life. It can happen to anyone. The problem is never how much you drink or the frequency with which you drink. It is ALWAYS an “allergy of the body and an obsession of the mind.”

I won’t hit you over the head with the big book of AA, but if you want to talk privately, I am here. Send me a pm and I’ll respond. Also, remember the you and only you are the one who can determine whether you have a problem or not. Others can only speculate. AA has worked for me. It isn’t always necessary for others. 🤷

Steph
 
I won’t hit you over the head with the big book of AA, but if you want to talk privately, I am here. Send me a pm and I’ll respond. Also, remember the you and only you are the one who can determine whether you have a problem or not. ** Others can only speculate.** AA has worked for me. It isn’t always necessary for others. 🤷

Steph
Although that is a great AA line, others certainly can tell you that you have a drinking problem or that you are an alcoholic. (If it walks like a duck, talks like a duck, chances are it is a duck.)

My grandfather drank two beers before work, came home for lunch and had two more. After work he switched to the hard stuff and drank until he either passed out or fell asleep (his words for passing out.) My grandfather was an alcoholic. He never said it, but I saw it.

My father drank every day. We went through beer and whiskey like it was water. Later in life he went to AA and claimed to be an alcoholic. He was an alcoholic well before he every said it.

If AA wants to claim that alcoholism is a disease, then like cancer, others can tell you that you have it.
 
I’m trying to get honest with myself and I’m wondering if I have a drinking problem. I don’t wake up and drink or anything but I have at least 2 glasses of wine a night. I was never a drinker but I started having wine because my husband did every night. Now he opens a bottle every night. I will drink alone, too. It’s usually to calm down and relax. I’ve tried curtailing it and I usually can. But it’s not easy. It doesn’t effect my work, and it’s not an “issue” but I know it’s not normal. What do you think?
My experience has been this:
  1. whenever someone says they have 2 drinks they really mean they have a lot but are trying to come up with a good number that doesn’t sound like too much. Law Enforcement will tell you that the most common answer from a stopped driver to the question, “Have you been drinking tonight?” is “I had two beers” (or glasses of wine).
  2. No one who is a normal, social drinker EVER asks themselves if they are drinking too much. Seriously. They never do. It is not an issue for them. It would be like me asking if I dance the rhumba too much.
  3. If you really want to figure this out then just stop drinking. Put it away. don’t buy it. swear off forever, with or without a solemn oath. see how long you can go without THINKING about drinking…and then see how long you can go without drinking alcohol at all. You might surprise yourself and see that you stopped from getting into a bad habit before it gets too late. Or you might surprise yourself and find out you cannot stop thinking about drinking. Or you might discover you can’t stop for longer than say 30 days without drinking again.
There is nothing immoral about drinking…but if this is a question bothering you then you owe it to yourself to test the waters.

Now, I must go…it is time to RHUMBA…:rolleyes:
 
Although that is a great AA line, others certainly can tell you that you have a drinking problem or that you are an alcoholic. (If it walks like a duck, talks like a duck, chances are it is a duck.)

My grandfather drank two beers before work, came home for lunch and had two more. After work he switched to the hard stuff and drank until he either passed out or fell asleep (his words for passing out.) My grandfather was an alcoholic. He never said it, but I saw it.

My father drank every day. We went through beer and whiskey like it was water. Later in life he went to AA and claimed to be an alcoholic. He was an alcoholic well before he every said it.

If AA wants to claim that alcoholism is a disease, then like cancer, others can tell you that you have it.
It’s not just a line… it shows a willingness to admit that you are. I knew well before I ever admitted it outloud, and like you’ve said of course others saw it. Most of my drinking was done in secret, alone, after the kids had gone to bed and the hubby was out of town. My behavior certainly was out of whack though. AA doesn’t call alcoholism a disease. We call it “an allergy of the body and an obsession of the mind”. The American medical association has labeled it a disease. The point is no one knows what the obsession is but the person themselves. That’s why only that person can determine it. If someone else could have read my mind (the obsession part) then I would agree with you.

Steph
 
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