I do not know whether there is a question of ‘leaking’. I do not know if the child, or her mother, attempted to speak to Mr. Baldwin about this and were, perhaps, even more thoroughly castigated.
But. . .I do know, from bitter experience, that no matter how hard one tries to maintain at least neutral relations in a divorce, no matter how hard one tries to shield the children from ill effects, if there is genuine abuse on the part of one or both parents, then it is more corrosive not to address the abuse.
How often did I attempt to explain away the hateful remarks and actions as “your father cares about you and even if the way he shows it might not be the way you or I would like or choose, he is still your father and worthy of respect on that account.” I did this thousands of times through the course of a very abusive marriage and separation, trying to ‘explain’ away abuse as ‘caring’.
But I was wrong to do so. Oh, I wasn’t wrong in trying to keep civil, or in my judgment that their father was their father and for them to respect him as their father.
But I was wrong in allowing them to get the idea that somehow, because this was ‘his way’ of caring, to abuse, that this way was ‘all right’. That wasn’t what I meant to get across as a message, but that was what they took from it. . .that this sort of screaming, rage, and worse was ‘caring’. It has taken years of therapy for us to understand that it wasn’t ‘all right’ or ‘caring’ and that there can really be no ‘glossing over’ of abuse under the guise of ‘caring’.
Perhaps Ms. Bassinger had tried to convey to her daughter all of the above and more. . .perhaps Mr. Baldwin, like my ex, is still convinced that he can literally say or do whatever he pleases as if he were a god. Perhaps there was no other way for this child to have the traumatic experience properly addressed. Yes, it is awful to have this ‘out in public’. . .but it is even worse to have it eating like acid into your soul ‘in private’ with no one to take your part or to let you know, in no uncertain terms, that this type of behavior is not only wrong, but that just because somebody ‘names’ you by a label, that does not mean that you must be, or accept, that label.
Got to watch out when pointing out a flaw when you have three fingers pointing back. While his dughter may or may not be, (I have nothing to say one way or the other I’ll just give the benifit of the doubt and say not) the only one who looks that way is him.