J
JeannetteCML
Guest
Why does it seem that some people are blessed with such a clear and unified, concrete and specific purpose for their lives and some people are just…well, ordinary? I mean, I know that everyone on earth has a purpose and is called by God to His love. But not everyone, it seems, is given a clear cut MISSION, nor even a singular mission–to a state in life, to a job, to community. It seems that the majority of people are lay people and they are just trying to make it in this world and trying to have their needs met–sometimes trying to make a difference. But be there aspirations and dreams, there are still impossibilities and limitations. Some people never marry. Other people are married, but not for their entire lives. Some people change jobs every five years. Some people work as cashiers and secretaries and countless other non-glorious occupations. Do these people go through any kind of process in which they reflected long and hard about what specific effect God wanted them to have on the world? What if God never tells them any specific thing? What if they don’t have a choice and they are doing the best they can? Can they live with passion, with drive, with a sense of direction? Can they be fulfilled? Or are they condemned to less meaningful lives then those who seem to have a bonified “vocation?”
I will tell you my spot in life so you have some idea of where I am coming from and why I am asking. I feel God is challenging me about this whole “vocation” business. I am a person who has earned a masters degree in theology but is now working as a cashier and living with parents. I do not want to marry. And I am very much a loner. I was on a quest for truth oringinally, a quest for knowlege and new creative ways of looking at the world. I still am in a way. But there remains the necessity of making a living. And it is spiritually and emotionally painful to me that instead of pursuing my interests I spend 40 hours a week checking groceries. I have thought of altertative that might enable myself to support myself such as office work, but that sounds equally draining, and really, just no fun. And I am really not the kind of person who can take my degree and go into ministry. I’m so quiet. So, the bottom line is, whenever someone tries to tell me about my life and says that God has some kind of “special plans” for me, I can’t accept it. I even get angry. There’s nothing “special” about it. I want to fight for something more. And I don’t know what I am able to or should do.
I will tell you my spot in life so you have some idea of where I am coming from and why I am asking. I feel God is challenging me about this whole “vocation” business. I am a person who has earned a masters degree in theology but is now working as a cashier and living with parents. I do not want to marry. And I am very much a loner. I was on a quest for truth oringinally, a quest for knowlege and new creative ways of looking at the world. I still am in a way. But there remains the necessity of making a living. And it is spiritually and emotionally painful to me that instead of pursuing my interests I spend 40 hours a week checking groceries. I have thought of altertative that might enable myself to support myself such as office work, but that sounds equally draining, and really, just no fun. And I am really not the kind of person who can take my degree and go into ministry. I’m so quiet. So, the bottom line is, whenever someone tries to tell me about my life and says that God has some kind of “special plans” for me, I can’t accept it. I even get angry. There’s nothing “special” about it. I want to fight for something more. And I don’t know what I am able to or should do.
