My step-son phrases it as “he scored the Confirmation level.” It’s a game to him. He doesn’t understand the sacrament or his obligation to the Church. His mother reasoned that if he were allowed to wait until he was 14 (age of consent in Canon Law) he would not willing choose to be confirmed - as she choose not to be confirmed when she was a teenager. She was just confirmed last year at age 51.
If he doesn’t understand then teach him.
And yes there is significant history of animosity between my family and my step-son’s mother. Prior to this occurrence we had managed to keep the child out of it.
I understand the re-ordering of the sacraments - but I also understand that in the entire State of Arizona only the Diocese of Phoenix has adopted this practice. All other Diocese still require that they be 15 or 16 to start preparation.
Just because only one diocese in the state has adopted this practice does not make it any less valid. There are diocese all over the country that have adopted the restored order of the sacraments. The children, some at the age of 7, have validly received their sacraments.
My step-son is happy about achieving the higher levels of Catholicism (as he sees it), however he is extremely distraught about the lying part. He has now been expelled from the Catholic school he was attending because in January (when the lying started by direction of his mother and Priest) he also started lying, cheating and stealing in his classroom.
Could there be an underlying problem there such as his parents arguing over the validity of his decision to receive the sacraments of the chruch? You stated above that he has always been kept out of things in the past. How much damage is this issue that you have causing him? Would it not be in his best interest to leave be?
Ultimately there are very clear requirements in Canon Law for what makes Baptism, First Communion and Confirmation valid. These conditions were not met in the case of my step-son, as no valid consent was given. The may not confer sacraments on an unwilling party - and since my step-son was under the Age of Consent, his parents must provide consent. My question was can these sacraments be invalidated based on Canon Law. I can only find discussion of marriages or vocation, but not the other sacraments. One would assume that the ability to invalidate applies to all sacraments.
You will have to find out if two parents must consent. As his mother (and she is his mother now matter how much you and his father dislike the fact) did consent and that may be something you will have to live with. You will also have to find out if the custodial parent must be the one to consent.