Annulments vs Divorce

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There have been many abuses in this area. There are tens of thousands of annulments granted in the US–more than in any other country. We have had a divorced priest and also a divorced and annulled deacon who was married for decades and had five children and yet claimed to not have lived the sacrament? And MANY who come to the church have previous marriages and so you ‘just get an annulment’. I have been a sponsor. One couple had 4 previous marriages to be annulled for example and, of course, they all were. And one lady was nervous because when her husband met another woman he liked better he told her that all he had to do was ‘just get an annulment’ and he did and married the newer and better Mrs.; there was nothign she could do to stop the ending of her marriage. The new and better Mrs is Mrs number 3, by the way. That couple is baptism lead couple in the parish.

There was an incredible article in the Homeletic and Pastoral review a couple of years ago that really brought the abuse of all the granting of tens of thousands of annulments home–some of the reason are so petty! But what you do is take your situation and make sure it fits somehow into the reasons that make for a dissolution-er, sorry, annulment (sacramental marriage cannot be dissolved). Of course the children suffer just the same as in any divorce situation and the loss of faith that accompanies the annulment is high.

So there is the statement that marriage is sindissoluble and then, wink wink, tens of thousands of annulments are granted. I am sorry folks, I do understand the teachings on marriage but the reality makes a joke of it in a way.

Who of us totally understood what marriage involved when we married? I am learning still after decades.

But what does an abandoned spouse do? There is that sad situation. I have known too many abandoned spouses and their pain from my best friend to my sister. Adultery is pandemic. But when the adulterer goes and gets an annulment to marry the co-adulterer, it is just a travesty.

I think I read that there were maybe 300 annulments in about 1960 and 40 years later it was tens of thousands–US in particular.

We can stomp our feet and say all those marriages were never sacramental but in all reality I cannot accept that.
 
Ave_Maria said:
There have been many abuses in this area. There are tens of thousands of annulments granted in the US–more than in any other country. We have had a divorced priest and also a divorced and annulled deacon who was married for decades and had five children and yet claimed to not have lived the sacrament? And MANY who come to the church have previous marriages and so you ‘just get an annulment’. I have been a sponsor. One couple had 4 previous marriages to be annulled for example and, of course, they all were. And one lady was nervous because when her husband met another woman he liked better he told her that all he had to do was ‘just get an annulment’ and he did and married the newer and better Mrs.; there was nothign she could do to stop the ending of her marriage. The new and better Mrs is Mrs number 3, by the way. That couple is baptism lead couple in the parish.

There was an incredible article in the Homeletic and Pastoral review a couple of years ago that really brought the abuse of all the granting of tens of thousands of annulments home–some of the reason are so petty! But what you do is take your situation and make sure it fits somehow into the reasons that make for a dissolution-er, sorry, annulment (sacramental marriage cannot be dissolved). Of course the children suffer just the same as in any divorce situation and the loss of faith that accompanies the annulment is high.

So there is the statement that marriage is sindissoluble and then, wink wink, tens of thousands of annulments are granted. I am sorry folks, I do understand the teachings on marriage but the reality makes a joke of it in a way.

Who of us totally understood what marriage involved when we married? I am learning still after decades.

But what does an abandoned spouse do? There is that sad situation. I have known too many abandoned spouses and their pain from my best friend to my sister. Adultery is pandemic. But when the adulterer goes and gets an annulment to marry the co-adulterer, it is just a travesty.

I think I read that there were maybe 300 annulments in about 1960 and 40 years later it was tens of thousands–US in particular.

We can stomp our feet and say all those marriages were never sacramental but in all reality I cannot accept that.
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Is it true that any marriage can be annulled in the USA?
 
sidbrown said:
Is it true that any marriage can be annulled in the USA?
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NO.
Marriages are not annulled. Circumstances leading to the wedding are examined to determine if a valid marriage exists. If marriage is found to be valid, no declaration of nullity is granted.
 
davidv said:
NO.
Marriages are not annulled. Circumstances leading to the wedding are examined to determine if a valid marriage exists. If marriage is found to be valid, no declaration of nullity is granted.
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What percentage are denied?
 
sidbrown said:
I heard that it was less than five percent that are ever denied in some areas and this accords with what josephdaniel29 has reported here.
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If that is an accurate number, a big if, as it is based on speculation, what do you think that means?
 
sidbrown said:
It means that Ave Maria! in post #20 was correct in her observations.
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Ave Maria’s observations are just that. Whether they mean what she says they mean is quite another matter.

Abuses don’t not falsify the doctrines which Marriage Tribunals are expected to uphold.

All that being said. A declaration of nullity does not equal divorce.
 
davidv said:
Ave Maria’s observations are just that. Whether they mean what she says they mean is quite another matter.

Abuses don’t not falsify the doctrines which Marriage Tribunals are expected to uphold.

All that being said. A declaration of nullity does not equal divorce.
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Some people think it is just a matter of semantics and nothing else.
 
Ave_Maria said:
There have been many abuses in this area. There are tens of thousands of annulments granted in the US–more than in any other country. We have had a divorced priest and also a divorced and annulled deacon who was married for decades and had five children and yet claimed to not have lived the sacrament? And MANY who come to the church have previous marriages and so you ‘just get an annulment’. I have been a sponsor. One couple had 4 previous marriages to be annulled for example and, of course, they all were. And one lady was nervous because when her husband met another woman he liked better he told her that all he had to do was ‘just get an annulment’ and he did and married the newer and better Mrs.; there was nothign she could do to stop the ending of her marriage. The new and better Mrs is Mrs number 3, by the way. That couple is baptism lead couple in the parish.

There was an incredible article in the Homeletic and Pastoral review a couple of years ago that really brought the abuse of all the granting of tens of thousands of annulments home–some of the reason are so petty! But what you do is take your situation and make sure it fits somehow into the reasons that make for a dissolution-er, sorry, annulment (sacramental marriage cannot be dissolved). Of course the children suffer just the same as in any divorce situation and the loss of faith that accompanies the annulment is high.

So there is the statement that marriage is sindissoluble and then, wink wink, tens of thousands of annulments are granted. I am sorry folks, I do understand the teachings on marriage but the reality makes a joke of it in a way.

Who of us totally understood what marriage involved when we married? I am learning still after decades.

But what does an abandoned spouse do? There is that sad situation. I have known too many abandoned spouses and their pain from my best friend to my sister. Adultery is pandemic. But when the adulterer goes and gets an annulment to marry the co-adulterer, it is just a travesty.

I think I read that there were maybe 300 annulments in about 1960 and 40 years later it was tens of thousands–US in particular.

We can stomp our feet and say all those marriages were never sacramental but in all reality I cannot accept that.
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In our Parish, I would guess to say(not judging) that over 70% are remarriages, some 3rd or fourth, all annuled. I agree with you Ava I do not understand annulment.
 
Ave_Maria said:
There have been many abuses in this area. There are tens of thousands of annulments granted in the US–more than in any other country. We have had a divorced priest and also a divorced and annulled deacon who was married for decades and had five children and yet claimed to not have lived the sacrament? And MANY who come to the church have previous marriages and so you ‘just get an annulment’. I have been a sponsor. One couple had 4 previous marriages to be annulled for example and, of course, they all were. And one lady was nervous because when her husband met another woman he liked better he told her that all he had to do was ‘just get an annulment’ and he did and married the newer and better Mrs.; there was nothign she could do to stop the ending of her marriage. The new and better Mrs is Mrs number 3, by the way. That couple is baptism lead couple in the parish.

There was an incredible article in the Homeletic and Pastoral review a couple of years ago that really brought the abuse of all the granting of tens of thousands of annulments home–some of the reason are so petty! But what you do is take your situation and make sure it fits somehow into the reasons that make for a dissolution-er, sorry, annulment (sacramental marriage cannot be dissolved). Of course the children suffer just the same as in any divorce situation and the loss of faith that accompanies the annulment is high.

So there is the statement that marriage is sindissoluble and then, wink wink, tens of thousands of annulments are granted. I am sorry folks, I do understand the teachings on marriage but the reality makes a joke of it in a way.

Who of us totally understood what marriage involved when we married? I am learning still after decades.

But what does an abandoned spouse do? There is that sad situation. I have known too many abandoned spouses and their pain from my best friend to my sister. Adultery is pandemic. But when the adulterer goes and gets an annulment to marry the co-adulterer, it is just a travesty.

I think I read that there were maybe 300 annulments in about 1960 and 40 years later it was tens of thousands–US in particular.

We can stomp our feet and say all those marriages were never sacramental but in all reality I cannot accept that.
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Please note that we are under a new canon law as of 1983, this new law is most likely one of the factors in the increase in allowance for decrees of annnulments.

In addition I believe that the bigest problem is not on the back end of this situation but the front end. We have not been doing enough education in the sacraments, especially marriage and what is and is not moral behavior, for the average Catholic to understand the nature of the sacrament. The society in which we find ourselves is another poison to the sacrament, to the point where I even hear “Catholics” say they think same sex marriage is ok.

As far as the percentage of annulments that are granted, as an advocate, I have had about a 80% rate of annulments granted for the cases that I have submitted to the Tribunal. I try only to submit the cases that have a chance. So any statement that all applications for annulment are granted is false.

Furthermore, note that to apply for an annulment a divorce must already have happened. The annulment process is for healing not for division.

Peace to all,

Bill
 
tweetymom said:
In our Parish, I would guess to say(not judging) that over 70% are remarriages, some 3rd or fourth, all annuled. I agree with you Ava I do not understand annulment.
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The Church’s teaching on marriage and its validity is readily available in many documents. They are there to be understood.
 
Kaste said:
Here’s my problem:

Annulments mean many valid marriage never legitimately happened. A few clergy members decide if a marriage was valid or not. Give me a break!

Do I buy that in theory? Yes. Perhaps in 1 out of 5,000 marriages really were illegal to begin with. **But in reality **Catholics remarry just as Protestants do, and it cannot be the case that most or all these Catholics never had a legitimate marriage.

I don’t have a problem with bishops approving a separation after careful examination, but to say that all these separations are the result of illegitimate marriages…c’mon guys!

Again maybe I’m missing something. I know often Catholic theology is nuanced, so please point me in the right direction. Such as maybe Catholics can get “separated” and then re-marry" but not “divorced” or some technicality like that…

K
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Annulments are increasing becuase of the ethical moral fabric of society is decreasing. Far too many people are getting married hastely for motivations other than genuine love.
 
I have been a member of the Catholic forums for a while and have never posted a comment. But this thread struck me in a way I felt the need to add my thoughts.

Currently I am in the process of requesting an annulment. I won’t go into details here, but feel I have made a valid request. I will respect whatever decision is made because I believe in the providential authority of the Catholic church. The original post commented that there seem to be a great number of annulments requested and granted today. I could not agree more. However, I feel the issue is not that the church is mistakenly granting annulments on a whim, to appease Catholics who want to remarry. I feel the issue is that people who consider themselves Catholic have no concept of a sacramental marriage. My confidence is that if they truly understood it, they would have never chosen the path of “marriage”, or the subsequent path of “remarriage”. To answer why so many annulments are being approved today, I say that unfortunately it’s because so many non-sacramental marriages are being entered into in the United States and around the world. That’s the sad truth.

Jacinta of Fatima stated from our Blessed Mother, “Many marriages are not good; they do not please Our Lord and are not of God.” I think therein lies the answer to the downfall of many marriages outside the church today.
 
Deefraz said:
I have been a member of the Catholic forums for a while and have never posted a comment. But this thread struck me in a way I felt the need to add my thoughts.

Currently I am in the process of requesting an annulment. I won’t go into details here, but feel I have made a valid request. I will respect whatever decision is made because I believe in the providential authority of the Catholic church. The original post commented that there seem to be a great number of annulments requested and granted today. I could not agree more. However, I feel the issue is not that the church is mistakenly granting annulments on a whim, to appease Catholics who want to remarry. I feel the issue is that people who consider themselves Catholic have no concept of a sacramental marriage. My confidence is that if they truly understood it, they would have never chosen the path of “marriage”, or the subsequent path of “remarriage”. To answer why so many annulments are being approved today, I say that unfortunately it’s because so many non-sacramental marriages are being entered into in the United States and around the world. That’s the sad truth.

Jacinta of Fatima stated from our Blessed Mother, “Many marriages are not good; they do not please Our Lord and are not of God.” I think therein lies the answer to the downfall of many marriages outside the church today.
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Amen!
 
Maybe today people bail out at the first discomfort rather than endure the humbling experiences of a real marriage?
 
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