Another baby!!!

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After reading this post it left me thinking, I really do feel that I have forgiven, real forgiveness, but then when I feel like this and I get angry and upset it makes me question that forgiveness.

When one forgives does that mean we can’t get upset anymore? Is the sign of total real forgiveness not getting angry, emotional, upset irritated, etc. with the person(s) or situation that has caused such pain and suffering? If that’s the case then I haven’t really forgiven, but I want to think that I did because I made the conscious decision to forgive and move on.
Lexee, I’ve followed your troubles for awhile but I never felt that I had any words that may help until now.

Forgiveness is a process … sort of like the grieving process. At first it is so painful and one can’t imagine the pain will ever subside but over time the pain does dull gradually. But there will be incidents that come up that will send the pain shooting right back into our hearts.

I’ve had two men who hurt me tremendously. What I have found is that I have learned to cope better when the memories or incidents happen. I understand that what I am feeling is understandable rage and hurt from the unfair actions of another person. And each time it happens I offer it up and try to keep on with my life.

Now when I hear about something the (bad word) did or when I think about what he did to me, I sort of shake my head and feel pity. And I feel anger that he is still making people suffer because of his actions. But I would feel that about anybody that does what he does. It’s called justifiable anger.

I feel that I have forgiven him as much as a possibly can for now. That’s all I feel that can be expected of anyone here on earth. As long as we don’t take our pain and cause suffering to others or use it as an excuse to behave badly, we’re okay.

You are a tremendously strong woman and I admire the way you have managed to survive these past couple of years. You are so on the right track. Just keep moving forward.

I’ll keep you in my prayers.

Mary
 
Hey Lexee…thinking and praying for you and your angel, Fatima, today, Mother’s Day.
Thank you so much Island Oak…I’m just seeing this a month later:blush:. I hope you had a wonderful Mother’s Day too, I hope all moms had a wonderful day!!! I’ve been busy so I haven’t had a chance to be on the forums for awhile, it’s great to see all the familiar names here. Everytime I’m gone for awhile and then come back I realize how much I miss everyone here and how important this forum is for me. Take care and may God Bless you.
 
Lexee, I’ve followed your troubles for awhile but I never felt that I had any words that may help until now.

Forgiveness is a process … sort of like the grieving process. At first it is so painful and one can’t imagine the pain will ever subside but over time the pain does dull gradually. But there will be incidents that come up that will send the pain shooting right back into our hearts.

I’ve had two men who hurt me tremendously. What I have found is that I have learned to cope better when the memories or incidents happen. I understand that what I am feeling is understandable rage and hurt from the unfair actions of another person. And each time it happens I offer it up and try to keep on with my life.

Now when I hear about something the (bad word) did or when I think about what he did to me, I sort of shake my head and feel pity. And I feel anger that he is still making people suffer because of his actions. But I would feel that about anybody that does what he does. It’s called justifiable anger.

I feel that I have forgiven him as much as a possibly can for now. That’s all I feel that can be expected of anyone here on earth. As long as we don’t take our pain and cause suffering to others or use it as an excuse to behave badly, we’re okay.

You are a tremendously strong woman and I admire the way you have managed to survive these past couple of years. You are so on the right track. Just keep moving forward.

I’ll keep you in my prayers.

Mary
Thank you Mary, I know it’s people like you that have gotten me through this difficult time in my life, people like you who don’t know me yet pray for me. Believe me when I say I have had nothing to do with getting through this, it’s been God, our Blessed Mother, the Holy Spirit and your prayers and good wishes.

I give all glory to God for giving me the strength and optimism to go on living my life and make a good home for my son.

I’m sorry for the pain that you’ve been through, and you’re right forgiveness is a process, it’s forgiving on a daily basis and from what I hear it gets a bit easier everytime. I will pray that your pain subsides also, and that as time goes on forgiveness comes easier and easier for those that hurt you.

Thank you for your words, they have meant a lot.
 
Lexee, I have been following your posts, and will keep you in my prayers as I am sure the other members of the forum are already doing. I hope that after your civil divorce is granted that you petition for an annullment in the Church. From everything that you have said about your husband, there must be grounds for it. My sister’s husband left here after twenty-four years of marriage and four children, for their late daughter’s much younger riding instructor. The whole situation was devestating for my sister and the children, who were not little at the time. After the divorce, which she could not prevent, she lived as a proper Catholic married woman until she was granted an annullment. Several years later she met a wonderful Catholic widower around her own age, and they were married in the Church surrounded by their children. Right now all of your hurt is understandably raw, but in time you will feel better. If you are free to marry again in the Church, when the wonderful man who you deserve comes into your life, you will be ready.
 
Forget about your stupid husband.But surely youre not mad at the wonderful little creature who will soon be a new baby?The baby deserves better parents and Im sorry that it has to be born of such fools.But even though you dislike your husband and his girlfriend, dont you love the baby?It is a wonderful, innocent little child who is very unfortunate to have such horrible parents.I hope it grows up and has a wonderful life filled with adventures and never sees its parents again.It is much, much better then them.Its a new life who will probably grow up and do great things.Arent you glad, for the baby’s sake?
 
Forget about your stupid husband.But surely youre not mad at the wonderful little creature who will soon be a new baby?The baby deserves better parents and Im sorry that it has to be born of such fools.But even though you dislike your husband and his girlfriend, dont you love the baby?It is a wonderful, innocent little child who is very unfortunate to have such horrible parents.I hope it grows up and has a wonderful life filled with adventures and never sees its parents again.It is much, much better then them.Its a new life who will probably grow up and do great things.Arent you glad, for the baby’s sake?
Lexee is not saying anything about the child. She is struggling with very human emotions and I for one think she is amazing.
Like Mary said, Lexee, forgiveness is a process. You make the decision to forgive even if the feelings are not there yet. The fact that you have, of your own free will, chosen to follow God’s Law by forgiving these people shows that you are not missing the opportunity to become a great saint. Thank you for sharing your life with us.
 
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