Any advice for a tired, lapsed catholic?

[Gottle_of_Geer]

Geer, is that your advise up above “Don’t Hurry take your time” What if his time is up the next day? Today is the day for salvation, tomorrow may not come.

Ufamtobie

Yes, that is my advice. I gave it precisely because the issues are important. It’s no use chivvying people like the OP - least of when the OP sounds so very tired. Odd as this may sound, faith is too important for anyone to get tied up in knots about it: there is such a thing as being too religious for your own good - I should know: that was a mistake I made for ages. It does no good - not to the believer, not to his or her family; anxiety is not a virtue.​

As for the day of salvation - it’s not going to end for a few million centuries yet Stampeding people into faith does little good if any; & did not Jesus say, “Count the cost” ?

 

[wcknight]

I think a lot of folks, myself included go through a time, when the faith becomes more of a burden than a help. Before I lapsed, I found that I could not live up the standards the faith required of me, mass, confession etc was too much of a burden for me.

Ironically my kids are into that same pattern now. For a while I went to mass only at Easter and Christmas and even then I didn’t feel too enthusiatic about it. It took more than 10 years for me to return. A lot of reading about other faiths and about our faith eventually brought me home.

Now, I go to mass because I truly WANT to be there. I’m much more active in the Church than I ever was before. IF you want your faith to be stronger, read about folks whose faith was incredibly strong. Read about the saints, what they went through, what their attitude and thinking was. Our faith needs to be fed with encouragement, with the sacraments and with work. I joined the Knights and I became an usher. It helps to be surrounded by folks who believe as you do. Volunteer to help out. Working with the Church gives you a better sense that you really are an integral part of it. IF you become an important part of the Church, it will become an important part of you.

 

[emarc]

Hi all

Just wondering if you guys had any advice for a tired lasped catholic, fed up to the back teeth with secularism but unable to get back into the swing of the religion I was born and baptised into.

I tried a while back to go to mass, at least every sunday. It lasted about a month. I just kinda faded away from the church again and now dont bother. I started to read the bible for a while, and got fed up with that too. I bought prayer books and stuff but got fed up reading and saying them.

I have no idea why though. I just seem to get a little bit fired up, then it just seems to fizzle out real quick.

I just dont seem to be able to be consistent and committed. There must be something seriously lacking in my faith but I dont know what it is. I;ve toyed with other religions but never seriously. I kinda just resigned myself to the fact that I was born a catholic, was brought up as a catholic and I’ll always be a catholic in name anyhow.

And I do KNOW a lot of you wont consoder me a catholic as I dont practice the faith, but I just dont know what to do about finding that fizz again.

Any ideas?

BikeCop.

have you tried visiting juveniles at detention centers, or doing volunteer work as catechist, or delivering meals for handicaps and seniors? try it and Christ is waiting for you there.
God bless.

 

[maryjk]

Bike Cop

Find a friend. Make yourself accountable. I know it sounds crazy. We should want to go to Mass. But if we are out of the habit, we may need a little help.

If you know something that is at Mass every week, approach them and ask for their help. If not, befriend someone. What you need is something that is willing to call you if you don’t show.

 

[GraceDK]

Hi all

Just wondering if you guys had any advice for a tired lasped catholic, fed up to the back teeth with secularism but unable to get back into the swing of the religion I was born and baptised into.

I tried a while back to go to mass, at least every sunday. It lasted about a month. I just kinda faded away from the church again and now dont bother. I started to read the bible for a while, and got fed up with that too. I bought prayer books and stuff but got fed up reading and saying them.

I have no idea why though. I just seem to get a little bit fired up, then it just seems to fizzle out real quick.

I just dont seem to be able to be consistent and committed. There must be something seriously lacking in my faith but I dont know what it is. I;ve toyed with other religions but never seriously. I kinda just resigned myself to the fact that I was born a catholic, was brought up as a catholic and I’ll always be a catholic in name anyhow.

And I do KNOW a lot of you wont consoder me a catholic as I dont practice the faith, but I just dont know what to do about finding that fizz again.

Any ideas?

BikeCop.

BikeCop.
Only Jesus knows who you really are and what this is all about. And He is whom you ought to spend time getting to know. He is an interesting aquaintance. Start to walk in His Power and in His life and become a man on a mission and I promise you, one day wont seem like the next.
One place to start is by stop taking your faith for granted.
You know Jesus. Now you need to know Him more… I would recommend listening to and reading testimonies from all kinds of people that came to know Him, were transformed by Him and who are now happy and free from the bondage of sin, idol-worship or empty religious structures.
You can get aquainted with all kinds of Christians who were lost in sin, who were lost in prostitution, lost in a deadly physical sickness, lost in Islam or occultism and who are now free, whole, healed, in the Truth…

You like to read… get reading material… like:
books: David du Plessis, Corrie ten Boom, Bilquis Sheikh, Roy Shoeman… too many to list.
You want mystics: how about reading about Padre Pio (or watching the movie about him), Maria Valtorta, Julian of Norwich or Briege McKenna (a favourite now-living saint) … how about former muslims becoming Christians… this will fire you up to appreciate what you have: answering-islam.org/Testimonies/index.html
Like to listen, listen on the net (for instance: salvationisfromthejews.com/audioconverts.html has great testimonies… and I mean… awesome!) and soo many more you better find your self according to what interests you.

Jesus is as alive today as He was 2000 years ago. He is active… doing the same crazy stuff as back then. If you dont experience it, then go search for those who do, and learn from them… get contaminated with their holy virus

You’ll be alright… You got the thirst.

 

[GraceDK]

Yet I enjoy my life fully! If I were to be distracted by a love for a deity, I would waste time that I could otherwise spend enjoying life.

I suspect the OP also enjoys life too. Why bother with unnecessary, unwarranted guilt?

Impossible is quite the claim to make, especially for a non-quantifiable feeling of enjoyment.

Your basic assumption is:
faith = guilt

my experience:
No faith = dull, meaningless life in the violence of ones own pleasures that never go away only grow big and nasty, and the empty hole inside

faith = a real relationship with a real Person who brings overflowing joy into my life so that I CAN LIVE DELIBERATELY, INTENSELY AND SUCK ALL THE MARROW OUT OF LIFE. When I didn’t know Christ, I existed. Now I live… every action, thought, word, embrace is of infinite importance now.
Life in the fullest.
Every human relationship is endlessly more amazing and beautiful now.

The person who cannot feel guilt, can also not feel joy and success. The person who denies guilt as a human experience, is doing it because he is afraid of the abyss. The abyss is present… but guilt doesnt toss me down into it. Because Christ carried all my sins up on the cross I am free. I dont supress my wrong doings like you have to … I recognize them and become free.

My heart, what more can you want???

Halleluja! Thanks for letting me write this post to you.

God is GREAT!

 

[flaco40]

A book that really helped me to see the truth of the Catholic faith wasn’t written by a Catholic at all. The Case for Faith. It was written by a man who became a Christian after a career as a journalist. He decided to investigate the faith using the same journalistic rules as he would for any other story. ( more than one source, sources need to be reliable etc.) It helped me to realize that this stuff really is not fantasy. It is the Truth. And you can put your Faith in it.

 

[humble_in_doubt]

Hi all

Just wondering if you guys had any advice for a tired lasped catholic, fed up to the back teeth with secularism but unable to get back into the swing of the religion I was born and baptised into.

I tried a while back to go to mass, at least every sunday. It lasted about a month. I just kinda faded away from the church again and now dont bother. I started to read the bible for a while, and got fed up with that too. I bought prayer books and stuff but got fed up reading and saying them.

I have no idea why though. I just seem to get a little bit fired up, then it just seems to fizzle out real quick.

I just dont seem to be able to be consistent and committed. There must be something seriously lacking in my faith but I dont know what it is. I;ve toyed with other religions but never seriously. I kinda just resigned myself to the fact that I was born a catholic, was brought up as a catholic and I’ll always be a catholic in name anyhow.

And I do KNOW a lot of you wont consoder me a catholic as I dont practice the faith, but I just dont know what to do about finding that fizz again.

Any ideas?

BikeCop.

I guess I would be considered a lapsed Catholic by, well, Catholics (not by me though). Why allow your life to ruled by anything besides common sense and rational intelligence; that’s what I say?

Believe me if you feel guilt religion won’t help you. Just make amends and live a good life and it will pass, like a bad cold (or see a good shrink if it’s that bad, like you would see a doctor if you couldn’t shake that cold).

 

[MelanieAnne]

Just a thought along these general lines ~ it was Jesus Himself that taught that those things that tended to pull a person away from God had their origins in evil. (The phrase “Get thee behind me Satan!” comes to mind.)

These days, the secular world tells us that religion is no big deal, and you don’t need it to have a good life. While it may sound easy, and it doesn’t sound evil, this subtle indirect approach may be even more evil than one that ridicules faith. I wonder what Jesus would say about it?

 

[BikeCop]

Ok Wow. Some great comments and supportive writing here ladies and gentlemen.

It’ll take me a while to read through it all but you can be sure I will.

Thank you for taking the time out of your day to reply to me.

Appreciated.

BikeCop.

 

[emeraldcoast]

have you tried visiting juveniles at detention centers, or doing volunteer work as catechist, or delivering meals for handicaps and seniors? try it and Christ is waiting for you there.
God bless.

I agree with you. See what Church ministries that you can get involved in–become part of the Church family.

I will tell you that from my experience when I have been active in my Church home not just a Sunday pew warmer, my faith has been grown the most.

The Methodist Church up the road has a fantastic saying posted “No Perfect People Wanted”

I took notes this past week at Sunday School and I will share this with you… "God is loving us into a saving relationship that is marked with healing, wholeness and reconciliation. God’s love is a gracious, amazing gift—it is yours and mine for the taking. "

God Bless!

 

[BikeCop]

In addition to the things others have said, I would like to add:

This requires an act of your will. It is an act of will to get up on Sunday and go to Mass. It is an act of the will to worship God.

Your screen name is “bikecop” and if you are indeed a bicycle police officer, then you likely do a lot of physical training to stay in shape. You go to the gym even when you don’t feel like it. You train your muscles even when they cry out to stop. This is physical training-- and if you had been severely out of shape before starting physical exercise you might have given up before getting in shape.

Same goes for spiritual muscles. You haven’t exercised them in a long time. Your will is lazy when it comes to things of God. You haven’t trained yourself in the act of worship and you haven’t built up those spiritual muscles that aid you in doing good and avoiding evil. St. Paul said he trained every day so that he could run the race to the finish line-- death.

You must do the same. Make a firm act of your will, and then pray for grace to carry it out.

Sir, when I read your response I slapped myself. Exercising spiritual muscles. How obvious can something be and yet you don’t see it.

You are correct in that I have to stay fit to do my job, I work out, I push myself physically and mentally every day.

How or why I would ever think that one’s spiritual life would NOT need to be given a workout is so obvious now.

I guess I must have been thinking that, as it’s an issue of faith, it would kinda just happen, you know. It would somehow just be.

It never occured to me to work on it, the same as I work out physically.

Thank you Sir.

 

[Iamnotafraid]

That’s the problem, it is impossible to fully enjoy your life without the love of Jesus as your primary focus.

I’m happier without a belief in God. I no longer carry around the burden of guilt, shame, anxiety or the dread of being watched and having my every thought known by a Super God living in an invisible paradise.

My life is much more enjoyable without Christ.

If I turn out to be wrong and the Christian God exists, ( opposed to say the Hindu God) and this God wants to punish me for my unbelief.

That’s her prerogative and if she wants to send me to hell, oh well, at least I’d be carrying out Gods will.

 

[emeraldcoast]

I’m happier without a belief in God. I no longer carry around the burden of guilt, shame, anxiety or the dread of being watched and having my every thought known by a Super God living in an invisible paradise.

My life is much more enjoyable without Christ.

If I turn out to be wrong and the Christian God exists, ( opposed to say the Hindu God) and this God wants to punish me for my unbelief.

That’s her prerogative and if she wants to send me to hell, oh well, at least I’d be carrying out Gods will.

Hi Iamnotafraid,

I am trying to follow your posts and can not find how they relate to any of BikeCop’s posts. From what I gather is that BikeCop needs a little hand to get back on the road. He hasn’t lost his way or forgotten the way, but just has fallen down in the road. As Christians, myself and others here are called to help our brother up, brush off his knees and encourage him in his faith

God Bless!

 

[BikeCop]

Hi Iamnotafraid,

I am trying to follow your posts and can not find how they relate to any of BikeCop’s posts. From what I gather is that BikeCop needs a little hand to get back on the road. He hasn’t lost his way or forgotten the way, but just has fallen down in the road. As Christians, myself and others here are called to help our brother up, brush off his knees and encourage him in his faith

God Bless!

Thank you Sir. That’s exactly what I’m looking for. And the responses to my request have been very encouraging.

I have one question regarding confession. I have not been since I was a child. Do I just turn up on saturday night, or do I need to book an appointment. Unfortunately, I don’t know any priests personally.

 

[Iamnotafraid]

Hi Iamnotafraid,

I am trying to follow your posts and can not find how they relate to any of BikeCop’s posts. From what I gather is that BikeCop needs a little hand to get back on the road. He hasn’t lost his way or forgotten the way, but just has fallen down in the road. As Christians, myself and others here are called to help our brother up, brush off his knees and encourage him in his faith

God Bless!

1. I gave a relevant response to what I believe to be an incorrect and over reaching comment by another poster on this thread.
2. This is posted in non-Catholic religions.
3. This is an open forum, open thread and my point of view may be helpful.

 

[emeraldcoast]

Thank you Sir. That’s exactly what I’m looking for. And the responses to my request have been very encouraging.

I have one question regarding confession. I have not been since I was a child. Do I just turn up on saturday night, or do I need to book an appointment. Unfortunately, I don’t know any priests personally.

Hi BikeCop,

Hey you are welcomed!

As far as Confession, I can tell you how it works in the Episcopal Church…

Your Sister in Christ!

 

[BikeCop]

Hi BikeCop,

Your Sister in Christ!

I apologize Ma’am :tiphat:

 

[Al_Masetti]

Thank you Sir. That’s exactly what I’m looking for. And the responses to my request have been very encouraging.

I have one question regarding confession. I have not been since I was a child. Do I just turn up on saturday night, or do I need to book an appointment. Unfortunately, I don’t know any priests personally.

If you’re really a cop, often the police department will have a priest who serves as a chaplain. If so, then call to make an appointment … the advantage to confessing to a priest who is a chaplain is that he has heard it all already and will have a special appreciation for what you have been experiencing.

Having said that, many of my friends have been away from the Church for a really long time … decades.

Their universal experience has been that they showed up on Saturday afternoon for the regular hours of confession and the priest always greeted them with a smile and said “welcome back”.

The easy standard “formula” is to enter the confessional, sit or kneel [your choice], make the sign of the cross and say "Bless me, father, for I have sinned. It has been 40 years [or whatever the time has been] since my last confession.

And then literally read off the first posting you made.

That you are tired and you want to come back. And that what you think you have is what they call “aridity”. You are dry. It is so normal.

Ask him if he wants to ask you any questions since you’ve been away from the sacraments.

If you don’t remember your prayers, just tell him you don’t remember the words to the Act of Contrition. Many priests in confessionals have a sheet of prayers and you can just read off the words.

It’s not necessary to get emotional. All you have to say is that you are sorry for your sins and you want to come back.

---

A number of the posters here have recommended books. My recommendation is “Weeds Among the Wheat” by Fr. Thomas Green. The beauty of it is that you can dip in anywhere and my experience has been that it so powerful that after reading a few sentences or a few paragraphs, it triggers all sorts of amazing meditations.

avemariapress.com/itemdetail.cfm?nItemid=437

If you can say part of the Rosary at bed time or very early in the morning or at some time when you are alone, that can help tremendously. There are no official rubrics, so you can say all the mysteries up front or add your own mysteries or, since the Mysteries are merely the life of Jesus along with the participation of Mary and the Holy Spirit, you can just visualize yourself for a while being present at one of them. My favorite is at the marriage feast at Cana … it was a party and Jesus made wine.

theholyrosary.org/index.html

I also like the Descent of the Holy Spirit. Because I’m there and can ask the Holy Spirit directly for direction and guidance. And to perform “Ebenezer experiences” on some of our political and church leaders to get them to effectively oppose abortion.

There is a lot of room for flexibility.

Sorry for blathering.

 

[MickeyUK]

Thank you Sir. That’s exactly what I’m looking for. And the responses to my request have been very encouraging.

I have one question regarding confession. I have not been since I was a child. Do I just turn up on saturday night, or do I need to book an appointment. Unfortunately, I don’t know any priests personally.

Hi Biker cop

I would telephone your local parish priest and make a appointment for your confession and dont worry about it he will help you through it.I was in a similar position to yourself about 9 months ago and now i love my faith again so much i go to church every Sunday and during the week receive all the sacraments do my fast days etc go to confession every two weeks or so, pray often and i even quit smoking for Lent (i was a 20 per day smoker).

I will keep you in my prayers.