Some of us have always been “on the market”, so to speak, but nobody wanted us.
Um, I live in “Granny Clampett Land”–Appalachian eastern Kentucky–and nothing could be further from the truth. This isn’t 1920 anymore. Ditch the stereotype. Thanks.
Paul in 1 Cor 7 says to follow the call you were given. The Church says there is a call that is single for the Lord in the world–it is not illegitimate. Have you even read the thread here? We are talking about discernment. If you are not called to marriage and family life, and not called to priesthood/religious life, then what?
Yeah, if nobody “buys your product” that is an example of God showing His will for your life by the circumstances of your life. But don’t feel like the person left standing without a chair after the music stops. God always wants you more passionately than anyone on this earth can. Read the Song of Songs…it shows His passion for you…it’s scandalous! (That’s in the Bible? swoon…thud)Some of us have always been “on the market”, so to speak, but nobody wanted us.
I was just thinking that all in all the Bible is a pretty ahem entertaining book when all’s said and done.
supernatural happenings and so on that anyone could want!lak, sounds like to need to find a good career coach in your area (or in the area where you want to live, if you want to relocate). It sounds like you want to use the skills you already have, but make sure to pick a product or service that you are passionate about. Give that some thought before you see the career coach.
Sometimes people treat the Bible with holy coma awe, and are shocked that there’s expressions in there like:I was just thinking that all in all the Bible is a pretty ahem entertaining book when all’s said and done.
All the love, hate, romance, sex, violence, political intrigue, (nudity :bigyikes
Even the odd bit of comedy - I find Balaam and his poor old a$s hysterical, and Elijah taunting the prophets of Baal.
Thank you! However the apostolic orders either teach or work in hospitals (service professions). I have already gone for career counseling. My lowest scores on career assessment tests were in health care, teaching, and social work. If I would not like to do those things as a job, I would certainly not be happy to do that as a religious vocation.
all the more reason to read it
at the very least, it’s more wholesome than the average paperback romance out there 
). There’s also my lovable grand-aunt (my maternal grandfather’s sister) who has unstintingly given herself in helping raise up my aunts and cousins in a 3-generation household. The whole big extended family loves her dearly, though she has refused to divulge her real age ever since I can remember!!! 
Maybe when I retire, if I’m ever fortunate enough to be able to retire. Right now, I have to work so long and so hard just to survive financially (and I don’t live a luxurious life), that there’s little time for the other. It’s when we’re not in one of the obvious “helping people” professions that we wonder what is the reason for our being single – it’s not as if I have loads of free time or lots of extra money to spread around, because I don’t.[sign]Being single isn’t lonely, you always have the Communion of Saints with you. The trick is keep yourself busy serving God through others![/sign]
I think it’s time for me to read the Song of Songs again.
It’s called “humor”, and judging by Holly Potter’s response it did the job and she’s a bit more upbeat about things.
Yes. I’ve read this thread and others on this subject both here and elsewhere. And one observation I’ve made after doing an analysis is that “single vocation” seems to be pushed by females more than males. In this thread, when I first started responded this morning, 63% of the posters are clearly identifiable as female representing about 2/3 of the posts. Of those who are clearly identifiable as male, there is me, one seminarian, on divorced person, one with SSA, and one other male.
All that means is that there is mean-spiritedness and unChristian behavior in the dating world, and I fail to see how that is of God. Many of these “circumstances” are unChristian and changeable, and I for one believe that instead of accepting unChristian circumstances we should fight them, even if it is simply by blowing off steam on the internet, since it might educate some attitudes. To say that “because A exists therefore it must be God’s will” is dangerous logic and can end up justifying the slaughter of 6 million Jews and the sexual abuse of children as “God’s will”, too (or one has a bright future as a lawyer defending dioceses against the abuse suits by scaring off litigants with religious guilt trips).
It’s very interesting that all the people who quote this chapter here seem to have forgotten the parts where Paul says that if one cannot exercise self-control, they should marry, and that to avoid immorality everyone should have their own spouse. Kinda hard to do that if everyone is taking themselves off the market, right? Also, the part where you quoted Jesus talking about the “eunichs for the kingdom” left out the part where He said that not everone can accept this teaching and to let those who can accept this teaching can. And in 1 Timothy 5 Paul encourages younger widows to remarry, have children, and keep house. The bottom line that is missing in all this talk about discernment is that not everyone can handle lifelong celibacy. If anything, that is more crucial than emotions (the whole “peace and joy” in your life) notion. And celibacy is not just the physical aspect, but the emotional aspect. Trust me, I did discern priesthood, and if I knew I could handle lifelong celibacy (i.e., life w/o a family, which you alluded to a bit in your response to Holly Potter) I would most likely be wearing a collar now! And I’m going to put forth a radical idea here that people should throw into the discernment mix: just because you can handle a lifetime without a family, what about those of the opposite gender who can’t - who is going to be there for them to marry; is it fair to them to take yourself “off the market”?
You are wrong; there is a public ceremony for receiving “consecrated virgins” into the church. There was one recently in the Chicago archdiocese recently:
Now this is going to go to the crux of the theological problems in discernment that I’m reading by posters here. If you think that you start out vocationless and need to discern what your vocation is, then you need to read CCC 1603, which states that the vocation to marriage is instilled in our very nature by our Creator (my summary). So, one does not need to discern if one has the call to marriage; we already have it from birth! In a sense, it is our “default vocation”! It is only if we perceive that we are called to “something higher”, i.e., a “celibate vocation” that we need to discern. CCC 1603 also quotes Gaudium and Spes which states that “the well being of the individual person and of both human and Christian society is closely bound up with the healthy state of conjugal and family life”. Hard to establish a family if everyone is taking themselves off the market, isn’t it?
It may be legitimate “on paper”, but I still have to question some of the motives used in discerning these days. First, the whole notion of a “micromanaging God” quashes the notion of personal responsibility and free will (and accordong to CCC 2230, people have the right and duty to CHOOSE their state of life - that’s right, we CHOOSE our state of life!). I wonder if this whole notion of “waiting for a sign form God” really reveals an inablity to make decisions for one’s self and take responsibility for it. Second, I think that the ravages of divorce seems to be the number one reason people are scared off from marriage. Is this of God or Satan? Additionally, is it because people have made an idol of their careers? Also, I was at a talk recently at the local Opus Dei parish where the organizer of the National Catholic Singles Conference stated that many of the people who stay single do so for selfish reasons as opposed to Christ-centered reasons - mentioning things like unwillingness to “give up toys”, too much emphasis on “wealth building”, the “contraceptive mentality”, etc.
Please read CCC 1603 where it says that the vocation to marriage is instilled in our very nature.
Fr. Tom Loya, a noted local Eastern-rite Catholic priest and local Theology of the Body speaker, says similar, and one of the reasons he gives is that there is no “permanence” to it (with obvious exceptions for stuff like vows to be consecrated virgins, etc.).
Hi Hatter
of course… and most important: JESUS lived as a single person !!!Do you happen to know why he thinks there is no permanence in a single vocation?