Anyone feel like they won't ever get married?

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My problem is I keep running into men who just aren’t into me. The ones that seem to really like me I could care less for. Seems to be God’s running joke. The guy I was currently dating contacts me less and less and I’m getting the vibe that he’s just not into me. I’ve decided to let the relationship go. He only calls once a week if that and always seems to be busy. Heck I’m busy too but still manage to make an effort. I’m sick of being treated as an afterthought. Why can’t guys just admit it if they aren’t into you. It would save a lot of time in the end. Sorry I’m just sort of frustrated today. :mad: :rolleyes:
 
Sierrah said:
My problem is I keep running into men who just aren’t into me. The ones that seem to really like me I could care less for. Seems to be God’s running joke. The guy I was currently dating contacts me less and less and I’m getting the vibe that he’s just not into me. I’ve decided to let the relationship go. He only calls once a week if that and always seems to be busy. Heck I’m busy too but still manage to make an effort. I’m sick of being treated as an afterthought. Why can’t guys just admit it if they aren’t into you. It would save a lot of time in the end. Sorry I’m just sort of frustrated today. :mad: :rolleyes:
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If he doesn’t have the manners to tell you out straight - then he’s just not worth it and you deserve better. Pray to St. Anthony or the Archangel Gabriel. They’re both great to find a husband!! 👍
 
Hi- I haven’t had time to read through the whole thread- but I wanted to say I never married until I was 37- and I thought I would never get married, either.
From the time I got out of high school until I was about 33 I was not living the Christian life- I won’t go into detail but I lived the typical single working womens life of the 70’s- 80’s and had a few serious but doomed relationship(including one with a married but separated man who went back to his wife.) At about 33 I had serious conversion in an evangelical church and wanted to give my life totally to Christ, which meant only dating Christian men (Catholics Included)and remaining celibate until marriage which I did. I did not date hardly at all for the next 3 years, I dated a few Christian men in the singles groups I attended but we never clicked. I think that was OK as I grew a lot spiritually in that time- and read a lot and attended many bible studies getting out of the New Age movement.
I prayed for God to bring me a Christian man but I also prayed that if the Lord wanted me to serve him single-y, I would, and to give me the strength to do so.
I moved to another state and changed jobs to be closed to family and went back to school part time. I remember waking up on my 36th birthday thinking I probably wouldn’t have any children because I had not yet even met a man, and even if I did get married it wouldn’t be for several years and the bio-clock might be out.
But that year I met my (now)husband, a Christian man at a singles function- married a year later, gave birth to son # 1 a year after that and son # 2 at close to age 40. So God did have someone for me! We’ve been married almost 15 years
 
Sorry for that post the other day it was me being frustrated. I will try and pray a Novena to St. Anthony. It’s been a rough week. Last night we spoke on the phone and he all but admited lying about being busy last weekend then said how he never made it to my area and how he only came down to visit a friends…(apparently I’m not good enough to be classified as a friend and this after he sent me a message he wanted to get together this week) I won’t go into the rest. I just wish he hadn’t called. I was all ready to send him a letter stating that I liked him but didn’t think we were a good match or at least something nice not mean and nit picky…why do guys have to be cads sometimes. :rolleyes: I can see why he’s still single. 🤷
 
Vanny said:
Hi- I haven’t had time to read through the whole thread- but I wanted to say I never married until I was 37- and I thought I would never get married, either.
From the time I got out of high school until I was about 33 I was not living the Christian life- I won’t go into detail but I lived the typical single working womens life of the 70’s- 80’s and had a few serious but doomed relationship(including one with a married but separated man who went back to his wife.) At about 33 I had serious conversion in an evangelical church and wanted to give my life totally to Christ, which meant only dating Christian men (Catholics Included)and remaining celibate until marriage which I did. I did not date hardly at all for the next 3 years, I dated a few Christian men in the singles groups I attended but we never clicked. I think that was OK as I grew a lot spiritually in that time- and read a lot and attended many bible studies getting out of the New Age movement.
I prayed for God to bring me a Christian man but I also prayed that if the Lord wanted me to serve him single-y, I would, and to give me the strength to do so.
I moved to another state and changed jobs to be closed to family and went back to school part time. I remember waking up on my 36th birthday thinking I probably wouldn’t have any children because I had not yet even met a man, and even if I did get married it wouldn’t be for several years and the bio-clock might be out.
But that year I met my (now)husband, a Christian man at a singles function- married a year later, gave birth to son # 1 a year after that and son # 2 at close to age 40. So God did have someone for me! We’ve been married almost 15 years
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I’m glad that you found your one and only. Please pray that the rest of do.👍
 
Hi, have just joined the Forums recently. Am a guy in my mid 20s and thought of seriously settling down. Haven’t been very staunch in my faith but came back strongly recently in Jan 08’. I’ve decided that God should be first place in my life. Since then I decided to hold nothing back in my search for His truth.

Just went thru the beautiful testimonies all your posts up to this point. Am really touched that I’m not the only one here who feels that I won’t ever get married. All your sharing has given me strength to press on with my cross.

Suffice to say where I live (Singapore), its not easy to find someone who clicks with my beliefs when everyone seems to be blinded by materialism. Even conservative societies, have lost our values.

I come from a conservative Catholic family and feel that premarriage marital embrace is wrong. And I believe that we should truthful and faithful in a relationship. I feel saddened that many of you encounter people who do not love you for who you are. Preferring appearance over your true self.

Even amongst fellow Catholics it is hard to find a match. That being said, my last dating experience was with a Catholic gal 5 years ago.

I share your views that finding a person (in my case a gal) who truly is willing to give fully, not afraid to weather storms with you, with a desire to place God in the centre of the relationship/family is not easy to come by even amongst Catholics.

Being from an Asian family that teaches ‘tough love’, ‘we love but do not talk bout it’, I’ve pretty much hardened and withdrawn into a loner, and I don’t get out much either to socialise either. I wonder if I will ever find my soulmate.

Wishing to journey with you guys/ gals (to so be politically correct) and hope that you will find your happiness. Will pray for you and hope that you will remember me in your prayers.

Ambrose
 
Dating has been on my mind a lot lately, so this thread is perfect for me. Maybe because 23 seems a whole lot older than 22! Yes, I agree with the previous posters. Where are all those wonderful Catholic young men? But I suppose God will bring the right person into my life when the time comes, and it is up to me to become the girl worthy to be his wife. 🤷 Although some days that thought is less comforting than others, especially as I hear about many friends getting engaged and married!
 
I am a widow and have been since my husband died in 1987. I was engaged once but it did not work out. Since that time, I have learned so much about myself and my Faith that I am really a different person than I was when I married. I often wonder if I would even be considered attractive by the wonderful man I married if he met me now? Visually, yes - he would still approach me. I am still his ‘type’ - but I am so different now than I was when we married…I don’t know.

I think it is perfectly possible to be happy alone and still hope to be married some day - I suppose the growth for me is in discovering that no matter what, my job is to bring glory and honor to God - and if I can do that, then I can be happy. I may feel lonely some days, I may feel overburdened some days, I may wish for a husband somedays. So what? And as for living alone until one dies - shoot, in my family the women live well into their 90’s whether they are married or not…lolololol…
 
Sierrah said:
My problem is I keep running into men who just aren’t into me. The ones that seem to really like me I could care less for. Seems to be God’s running joke. The guy I was currently dating contacts me less and less and I’m getting the vibe that he’s just not into me. I’ve decided to let the relationship go. He only calls once a week if that and always seems to be busy. Heck I’m busy too but still manage to make an effort. I’m sick of being treated as an afterthought. Why can’t guys just admit it if they aren’t into you. It would save a lot of time in the end. Sorry I’m just sort of frustrated today. :mad: :rolleyes:
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Seriously you could be twin sister. This is the problem i have run into lately so I took a year off from dating to get my priorites straight on A.) what was my true vocation and B.) after discern its marriage then what should I be looking for in a spouse. Thats the hard problem because i have meet some beautiful men who just radiate Christ and God and I am so attrached to them. Yet they only see me as the “friend” and then men who are interested are men who i would not date. II’ve thought about a dating site but the truth is a start law school in the fall and i don’t know many men who would understand the time committment that school will be and that its will quailty of time vs quanity of time.
 
macian said:
Dating has been on my mind a lot lately, so this thread is perfect for me. Maybe because 23 seems a whole lot older than 22! Yes, I agree with the previous posters. Where are all those wonderful Catholic young men? But I suppose God will bring the right person into my life when the time comes, and it is up to me to become the girl worthy to be his wife. 🤷 Although some days that thought is less comforting than others, especially as I hear about many friends getting engaged and married!
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Get ready for the cycle of friends getting married. I’ve been through a few. You meet people become friends. they get married then they have kids, then you don’t see them often and you make new friends who then start the cycle all over again. I am in my 4th or 5th cylce now. this is the year of the weddings (7) and next year will be babies…

But yes your right about the becoming a better women. I think of this time as God molding me into the women he needs me to be for the trials and other things that come in marriage and raising a family. Just like he is working on me he is also working on my spouse. I think it just might take men longer so we women have to wait. 😉 I would suggest everyone to just include your future spouse in your daily prayers and ask God to protect and take care of them and to let them grow closer to him.
 
“Doomed” to be single," seems like an apocalyptic interpretation of the unmarried state. No, seriously, I have been single all of my life, without yet suffering the consequences of doom.

My 59th birthday was last week, and I think my probability of marriage fell by another few percentage points.

People who are likely candidates for marriage seem to find each other, whether by gravity, or through divine intervention, or some other mechanism.

Those of us without this proclivity, can whine and complain, or we can strive to make the most of our circumstances, and do our best as single people.

The great majority of folks, with desire for married life, can achieve that state, if they make the effort.

The thing that strikes me, is my observation of the endless quest for perfection in a mate, and how that keeps people single, when they might otherwise find a spouse.

Now me, I will likely remain single, because that seems to be my natural state. But you never know.
 
Morwenna said:
:newidea: AZgirl, your post inspired me!

What if a bunch of us “still waiting” singles got together (virtually, of course ;)) and agreed to pray for each other individually?

Here’s my list so far:

Harmony1988
beckers
ladylinguist
Norseman82
chevalier
Gisella
Sierrah
JustinL
Felicity in TX
azgirl
Cosmo23
lampstand
Morwenna

Starting tonight, I am going to try to pray either the Rosary or the Divine Mercy each evening, and I will include each of us individually by (screen)name 🙂

I will pray that God will make each of us ready for our future spouse (and them ready for us), lead us to each other, and to pour out grace upon us to give us strength and hope while we’re waiting. :heaven:

Anyone want to join me in praying for these intentions? Maybe we could get a regular prayer thread going, or we could just continue to post here.

Who’s with me? :extrahappy:

:harp:
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I’d like to add my two of my sons,

Alan 39,
Trevor, 36.

Thank you so much for beginning this thread. I’m happy to join in the regular prayers for all the singles on your list and in this thread…and all the lonely singles out there. Thanks for starting the thread, Harmony!

Morwenna, thank you for directing me to this thread. It gives mr more hope for my sons. Thank you!
 
QUOTE=Morwenna;3538190

Harmony1988
beckers
ladylinguist
Norseman82
chevalier
Gisella
Sierrah
JustinL
Felicity in TX
azgirl
Cosmo23
lampstand
Morwenna
Alan,
Trevor

On your behalf I will pray that God will make each one ready for their future spouse (and them ready for you), lead you to each other, and to pour out grace upon you to give you strength and hope while you are awaiting. :heaven:

Praying the Divine Mercy Chaplet daily for each person on this list.
 
I feel like my DAUGHTER will never get married. She could relate to most of everything you have all said. She has gotten discouraged and I am so disappointed in her choices over the past year. She is a health professional, top of her class, attractive and 26. It seems like nothing works out and that’s a long story. The worst of it is that one of her male high school friends came back to town after 7 years out of state and became here “room mate” (she thought it would help pay her mortgage) and now it has developed into a disaster. In the end I guess her faith was weak and her morals also. I am heartbroken over the whole thing. But I still blame him, and I feel that his new age religious ideals are effecting her. I have had my say with both of them. So now I just feel like she is wasting another year of her life and will be starting over again eventually. They really appear to be a poor match and he has no interest in Catholicism, even ridicule for my Church, and has stated so to me personally. At this point she has broken every conviction that she had about lifestyle and behaviour. I have listened to her dreams all her life and this is not what she said she wanted. Seems to be in a state of temporary insanity. Of course I, and her sisters and one of her brothers are praying fervently. So girls, hang on and wait for what God has planned for you. Taking it into your own hands will only result in heartbreak. You cannot build your life on lies.
 
jeanannemarie:

Your daughter is 26 years old. You will always be her mother, you’ll always want what’s best for her; but it her time now, time to make decisions and time to experience the dismay and regret which come with having made mistakes. If she makes no mistakes she won’t learn anything.

If she chooses life outside the Church, well, you’ve done your best. No amount of having “your say” with her or with both of them will change the outcome. You gave her what you felt was the safety and protection of the Catholic Church - if she walks away from it, you’ve done what you can. And “it ain’t over till it’s over”: she’s a young woman. Give her time to come back around. There is still that possibility. Experimentation and implementation of alternative beliefs is not “temporary insanity”. It is a learning experience. Allow her that. Ask her about what is currently working for her and what’s not - without criticism. Tough line for a mother to walk, but do it. You can engage her in conversation without denigrating her choices.

I don’t believe any 26-year-old woman is ready for marriage. Some life needs to be lived before we can make choices in our own best interest. She is not “wasting another year” - sometimes we are called to learn what we don’t want as opposed to what we want, what we don’t need as opposed to what we need. We cannot and should not attempt to learn these things in a vacuum.

And you blame him? Why? Maybe he is the midwife in the birthing of your daughter’s morals, ethics, beliefs, desires. Nothing in this world happens by mistake. Allow this thing to run its course and see if she doesn’t end up in a better, more centered place.

In your own words, " . . . hang on and wait for what God has planned . . ." - for her.

marietta
 
Dear Marietta, I just read the post you sent for me. Thank you. That is certainly a better way to look at things than my perspective is. I will reread what you wrote and probably more than once. I think my lack of faith and alot of fear fuels my attitude. You put it in such a positive way. Thank you again.
 
I feel that I found my vocation, to be married to a woman and not a priest.

I also feel that I found the woman I am to marry, yet just waiting on God to put everything into place. It seems obvious to be that the stage it set and the characters are clear, just kinda waiting on His will to be done.

While total discernment isn’t complete just yet, I do feel that it is God’s will for us meeting and such.

Glory be to God!
 
I’m only 19…but I still feel like it’ll never happen 😦

But of course I get over that feeling sometimes.

Especially since I know this really amazing young woman who is incredibly wonderful

I hope to marry her someday
 
Harmony1988
beckers
ladylinguist
Norseman82
chevalier
Gisella
Sierrah
JustinL
Felicity in TX
azgirl
Cosmo23
lampstand
Morwenna
Alan
Trevor
and all others who are not mentioned.

On your behalf I pray that God will make each one ready for their future spouse (and them ready for you), lead you to each other, and to pour out grace upon you to give you strength and hope while you are awaiting.

Praying the Divine Mercy Chaplet daily for each person on this list.
 
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