Suat,
I hate jumping into a conversation I did not initiate, but maybe, just maybe, a new perspective could help (I don’t flatter myself to be more adept at apologetics than Kiekiolu, by any means, I have just thought on these matters considerably).
To atttempt to answer your questions (in order):
- Belief in God is refreshing, but not in a way you would think. I have found doubt/unbelief to be a cancer. It makes people unhappy and negative. I see this daily in the students I teach (I happen to have a large group of avowed atheist students who discuss The God Dillusion often). Their negativity brings people aroung them down, yet not the believers. It is quite obvious who is a believer and who is not amopng them. The Christian is called to “Live, to die, and to rise” on a daily basis. We all suffer heart-break and disappointment, but the believer is armed with the grace to pick himself up and begin anew. It is my perception (based on the atheists and agnostics I know) that a lack of belief is debilitating and hinders our ability to resurrect ourselves in daily life. If this is all there is, why bother? I have read Sartre and Camus. Their thoroughly atheistic perspective is dismal. My belief in God, and His Son saves me from such a perspective.
- “God is love.” All of us are born with a capacity to love. Love is beyond the mere sexual gratification and physical needs that Marx and Darwin promoted. When a man puts his own life on the line to save another person, that is love for another person…something Marx and Darwin cannot explain. No amount of intellectual wrangling can escape the fact that true love, selfless, giving love does exist…and it is not for material gain (as Marx would have it, nor for the survival of the species, as Darwin would have it).
- God has provided you with evidence of His existence, and not just you, but to everyone who lives today and haas lived in the past). Evidence can be discredited by the skeptic, however. As an atheist, you will be quick to assert that any phenomenon can be explained in a purely natural manner. Thus, your analysis of God’s subtle reminders and evidences will, mostly likely, lead to some kind of naturalist/materialist explanation.
The Church teaches that one of God’s gifts to us is free will. We are free to, when all information has been weighed, choose our paths. To assume that God has not been giving evidence. To give us free will, yet not give us the appropriate information to exercise such freee will is not free will, is it? We are slaves to a forgone conclusion. Why do you think so many in Yugoslavia/Serbia under Slobodan Milosevic were hankering for war with Bosnians, or supported actions in Kosovo? They were being fed one line, Milosevic’s line. Not too free, is it? We are being fed many lines: the Buddhist line, the Hindu line, the Muslim line, the atheist line, the secular-humanist line, and the naturalist line, aside from the Judeo-Christian line. We are free to choose. It is not easy to choose, though. Free choice was never meant to be easy.
God has not hardened your heart; you have hardened your heart. The “educated elite” have been feeding us a naturalist/materialist line for decades. An “intellectual” is one who rationally understands that there is no God. Despite the numerous ontological, metaphysical and philosophical proofs for God, all based on sound logic and reason, these “intellectuals” have decided that religion is bogus, it is irrational, and its adherents are little more than backwards ignoramuses stuck in a
Matrix-style existence. Typical of such an approach, the “free-thinkers” I have encountered are not really free: they have followed the “party-line” and automatically eliminated God’s existence and, before even considering the evidence for Him, decry it as irrational.