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jmjZelie
Guest
LaughingBoy brings up a good point. Drug users exhibit can exhibit behavior that appears like a mental illness, and drug use can also exacerbate mental illness.
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silver_moon
Guest
- No one here can diagnose her; I agree with people who have said she needs to see a doctor ASAP. You can’t make her see one, but it really sounds like she needs to see a good psychiatrist.
- As BEL said, she could be influenced by Scientology (or some other cult-type beliefs). If that’s the case, reasoning with her won’t change her mind. It could also be drugs, or a combination of illness and drugs.
- I have bipolar disorder. They say you cannot reason people out of delusions. I can’t diagnose, but if she won’t go to a psychiatrist I think you should go, to figure out how to talk to her. It is sounding right now like your family is putting a lot of effort into arguing/debating with her. That will never work.
I can’t determine that she’s delusional but your description is similar to ways I’ve thought. My problems in thinking were different but they had to do with the fact that the medication I was taking had stopped working. I had to have ECT, which acted as a reset, then the delusions seemed to fade like bad dreams. I then got on a different medication program which helped.
But, if this is mental illness (and if so it’s not necessarily bipolar, she’d need to be evaluated for other things), then getting upset b/c she is expressing ingratitude about her upbringing isn’t going to help. If she’s ill she may not be in a mental place to express gratitude. Getting better would hopefully change that.
However she does not have the right to insult any of you. Setting limits on what you will and won’t discuss can help with that.
What actually worked for me was writing emails to my doctor where I expressed my odd beliefs. That took the pressure off other people for being listeners and eventually made me see that ECT was a good idea.
You may need to set some limits with her, regardless of where her thoughts come from. If you don’t want to hear it, you can figure out what to say with the help of a doctor. Such as, I know you’re expressing the importance of religion, but I would rather not debate these issues with you. I prefer not getting into debates (or something like that).
if she won’t get help but seems ill she’s not going to react well to being told she’s delusional. I had to have a lot of treatment to get to this point. However you can still set a clear limit on what you will and will not talk about. I really think talking to a doctor will help you do that in ways that are the least stress-promoting as possible.
and don’t forget prayers, I’ll be praying for all of you.
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roseproject
Guest
Thank you for all the replies and prayers. Much appreciated 
A lot of you asked questions which I will address here…
Q: Did you/your parents talk to her about talking to a priest?
A: Yes on multiple occasions. She seems open to the idea but hasn’t taken any active steps towards it. She did talk to a Mormon bishop with her friend once (who is also Mormon) about her plan to bring the churches together. Not in great length though. She might plan on talking to him again. I’m not sure though.
Q: Does she still live with her parents?
A: Yes.
Q: Does she have a job?
A: Not currently. She’s had a few jobs in the past but was either laid off (usually for being late all the time) or she decided to quit because she didn’t like them enough. She’s always talking about wanting a super high paying job like being a supermodel or an actor or wanting to build buildings and start her own businesses, but she doesn’t seem to be putting any of her ideas into action. She daydreams a lot, but no real actions besides the minimal things she’s written about it on Facebook which only her friends could see.
One thing that’s really ironic about her is that she’s telling my parents “If we don’t have enough money, why don’t YOU get another job?” My dad does Tech support and my mom recently got into child care. Then, when her parents tell her that they can’t afford to fill up the gas tank again after she used it all up driving wherever she wants, she tells them, “Stop worrying about money so much.” “Money is stupid.”
Q: Has she explored Scientology?
A: I don’t believe so but then again I can’t say for sure what she spends her days doing. She separates herself from the rest of the family a lot. Rather interesting how similar some of the things she’s doing is to what Scientologists do though.
Q: Are your parents aware she has a mental condition?
A: Yes they are. She’s been clinically diagnosed for things like depression, Aspergers, I think mania, and she may be a touch bi-polar. She’s in denial that she has any problems though. I think she thinks that if she admits that they are problems, they will define her or something. She used to be on medication, but she complained that they made her feel emotionally “blank”. Some meds made her really tired, too.
Q: How does she plan on bringing together churches of opposing beliefs?
A: Besides what she told me, not sure. My dad has asked her, too; asked if she has a plan written down on paper about how she will do this. She says it’s all in her head and claims she has such a photographic memory that writing it down is unnecessary. He’s also wanted to know what her plans where for starting her businesses and whatnot but he’s met with the same response.
The thing is, there is inevitably going to be a point where, if she REALLY wants ALL the churches to be united in the way she describes, someone’s gonna have to give up certain beliefs to not be in opposition with the other. She says she doesn’t want to start a new religion because she doesn’t believe that’s what God wants, but in the end, that’s practically what it’s going to lead to in my mind. The only One who can unite all of humanity is the Holy Spirit, in His own time. She thinks maybe the Holy Spirit is working through her; that she is so FULL of the Holy Spirit that she can do ANYTHING.
Q: Is she on drugs?
A: I HIGHLY doubt it. One reason being that she is claims she’s apposed to anything physically harmful…I think. I can’t say for sure what goes on in her head most of the time. On one hand, she claims she’s all for physical health and wants to eat healthy, but she hardly eats anything throughout the day; one good size meal maybe two, and snacks a tiny bit throughout the day on things like sweets and chips
The friend she talks to on the phone fasts regularly and she’s kind of mimicked her in this way. Not just for fasting, but she seems to be proud of the fact that she has a tiny waist and her weight loss. She was never fat to begin with.
A lot of you asked questions which I will address here…
Q: Did you/your parents talk to her about talking to a priest?
A: Yes on multiple occasions. She seems open to the idea but hasn’t taken any active steps towards it. She did talk to a Mormon bishop with her friend once (who is also Mormon) about her plan to bring the churches together. Not in great length though. She might plan on talking to him again. I’m not sure though.
Q: Does she still live with her parents?
A: Yes.
Q: Does she have a job?
A: Not currently. She’s had a few jobs in the past but was either laid off (usually for being late all the time) or she decided to quit because she didn’t like them enough. She’s always talking about wanting a super high paying job like being a supermodel or an actor or wanting to build buildings and start her own businesses, but she doesn’t seem to be putting any of her ideas into action. She daydreams a lot, but no real actions besides the minimal things she’s written about it on Facebook which only her friends could see.
One thing that’s really ironic about her is that she’s telling my parents “If we don’t have enough money, why don’t YOU get another job?” My dad does Tech support and my mom recently got into child care. Then, when her parents tell her that they can’t afford to fill up the gas tank again after she used it all up driving wherever she wants, she tells them, “Stop worrying about money so much.” “Money is stupid.”
Q: Has she explored Scientology?
A: I don’t believe so but then again I can’t say for sure what she spends her days doing. She separates herself from the rest of the family a lot. Rather interesting how similar some of the things she’s doing is to what Scientologists do though.
Q: Are your parents aware she has a mental condition?
A: Yes they are. She’s been clinically diagnosed for things like depression, Aspergers, I think mania, and she may be a touch bi-polar. She’s in denial that she has any problems though. I think she thinks that if she admits that they are problems, they will define her or something. She used to be on medication, but she complained that they made her feel emotionally “blank”. Some meds made her really tired, too.
Q: How does she plan on bringing together churches of opposing beliefs?
A: Besides what she told me, not sure. My dad has asked her, too; asked if she has a plan written down on paper about how she will do this. She says it’s all in her head and claims she has such a photographic memory that writing it down is unnecessary. He’s also wanted to know what her plans where for starting her businesses and whatnot but he’s met with the same response.
The thing is, there is inevitably going to be a point where, if she REALLY wants ALL the churches to be united in the way she describes, someone’s gonna have to give up certain beliefs to not be in opposition with the other. She says she doesn’t want to start a new religion because she doesn’t believe that’s what God wants, but in the end, that’s practically what it’s going to lead to in my mind. The only One who can unite all of humanity is the Holy Spirit, in His own time. She thinks maybe the Holy Spirit is working through her; that she is so FULL of the Holy Spirit that she can do ANYTHING.
Q: Is she on drugs?
A: I HIGHLY doubt it. One reason being that she is claims she’s apposed to anything physically harmful…I think. I can’t say for sure what goes on in her head most of the time. On one hand, she claims she’s all for physical health and wants to eat healthy, but she hardly eats anything throughout the day; one good size meal maybe two, and snacks a tiny bit throughout the day on things like sweets and chips
The friend she talks to on the phone fasts regularly and she’s kind of mimicked her in this way. Not just for fasting, but she seems to be proud of the fact that she has a tiny waist and her weight loss. She was never fat to begin with.LaughingBoy1503
Well-known member
She will join a church to change the beliefs of others. She wants them to bekieve like her that all religions can be united and they cannot. Regardless if she thinks it is possible to believe contradicting doctrine at the same time it sounds close enough though not exactly like the other man’s idea.Actually even worse.
Still it does not seem so creative to me or noble. Just crazy. In my opinion, her plan to unite the religions of the world is the least of what her family should be worried about. Unless she is Charles manson or Marshal applewhite level charismatic.
It is not noble. It is disrespectful of everyone’s beliefs and religion Although she could mean well.
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jmjZelie
Guest
The idea of joining every church/faith group in order to unite them has several problems with it.
First, this is syncretism. It is an intellectual fantasy of many in the modern world. A syncretist claims that all belief systems can be blended. What that really means is that they do not actually believe anything they claim to believe. So they are either of very low intelligence, or they are liars, or they are delusional.
Second, if God Incarnate, the Second Person of the Blessed Trinity, the Divine Person of Jesus Christ has explained that Truth divides and if the religion He founded has not brought in all people because so many insist on going their own way and rejecting the truths handed on since the apostles, why in the world would any human person in the modern world think that they could be more persuasive than He??? Again, this is either mental illness or astonishing hubris.
Third and finally, each of these faith groups prohibit membership in the others, and for good reasons. They believe very different things about the world and their beliefs are often mutually exclusive. In order to protect their flock from scattering, they insist that their members NOT get involved in the other faiths or adopt other faith practices. For a person to attempt to bring about a consensus by joining everywhere and then attempting to persuade or worse, impose upon others to change their beliefs to suit a 24 year old who has grand plans but no history of accomplishing anything, that is arrogant and deceptive and condescending. Not to mention that by attempting to participate in all faith groups, she would be fulfilling the precepts of none of them. And nobody is going to believe anyone who can’t even be faithful to one’s own belief system. That is the very definition of a hypocrite.
Roseproject,
I don’t want to pile on. I think you already know these things, which is why you posted here. But when I see this idea of syncretism and humanistic unification actually entertained by posters on a Catholic forum, I must object.
First, this is syncretism. It is an intellectual fantasy of many in the modern world. A syncretist claims that all belief systems can be blended. What that really means is that they do not actually believe anything they claim to believe. So they are either of very low intelligence, or they are liars, or they are delusional.
Second, if God Incarnate, the Second Person of the Blessed Trinity, the Divine Person of Jesus Christ has explained that Truth divides and if the religion He founded has not brought in all people because so many insist on going their own way and rejecting the truths handed on since the apostles, why in the world would any human person in the modern world think that they could be more persuasive than He??? Again, this is either mental illness or astonishing hubris.
Third and finally, each of these faith groups prohibit membership in the others, and for good reasons. They believe very different things about the world and their beliefs are often mutually exclusive. In order to protect their flock from scattering, they insist that their members NOT get involved in the other faiths or adopt other faith practices. For a person to attempt to bring about a consensus by joining everywhere and then attempting to persuade or worse, impose upon others to change their beliefs to suit a 24 year old who has grand plans but no history of accomplishing anything, that is arrogant and deceptive and condescending. Not to mention that by attempting to participate in all faith groups, she would be fulfilling the precepts of none of them. And nobody is going to believe anyone who can’t even be faithful to one’s own belief system. That is the very definition of a hypocrite.
Roseproject,
I don’t want to pile on. I think you already know these things, which is why you posted here. But when I see this idea of syncretism and humanistic unification actually entertained by posters on a Catholic forum, I must object.
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mikecnorthwest
Guest
Your sister has a mental illness, whether it be bi-polar, schizophrenia, or something else. Trying to rationalize her thoughts is pointless. She needs to be clinically diagnosed. I’m very sorry.
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roseproject
Guest
Just wanted to clarify: My mom says she does, in fact, have depressive bi-polar two. Aspergers is a big facet of this, too.
Also, it is usually her who brings up religion and argues about it with our parents.
She’s had counseling, physiologists, and psychiatrists in the past, with little effect…well, at first she seemed to be ok with it in the beginning, but she just decided to stop going. She’s very stuck on her ideas at the moment. She’s been that way for many years with whatever idea she gets; very focused. Now, she’s just focusing on very crazy things and to a very intense level.
There’s also just the fact that we don’t know for sure what is the illness and what is just her being her. It’s difficult because my parents have pleaded for her to get some help and she just pushes them away further…and if they tell her she has to go, she might just run away and potentially expose herself to harmful situations outside of home.
Also, it is usually her who brings up religion and argues about it with our parents.
She’s had counseling, physiologists, and psychiatrists in the past, with little effect…well, at first she seemed to be ok with it in the beginning, but she just decided to stop going. She’s very stuck on her ideas at the moment. She’s been that way for many years with whatever idea she gets; very focused. Now, she’s just focusing on very crazy things and to a very intense level.
There’s also just the fact that we don’t know for sure what is the illness and what is just her being her. It’s difficult because my parents have pleaded for her to get some help and she just pushes them away further…and if they tell her she has to go, she might just run away and potentially expose herself to harmful situations outside of home.
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mommy_k
Guest
I am sorry you are going through this. Your parents have to find a way to get her on medication. She is not going to get better without it…
You can help your parents and sister by researching ways that others get a person on medication who refuse treatment, as this is not uncommon.
There is also a religion that already exists like this–just for backpocket info. I would not share this with her though.–The sikh religion in India.
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mikecnorthwest
Guest
She has a mental illness so rationalizing a way out is not helpful. She needs medication and mental health treatment. OP… please be aware that there may be little you can do to help her. It is not your fault or your parents. Mental illness is a medical condition that needs treatment. Unfortunately people who suffer from mental illness often resist treatment. You are not responsible for this and your are probably not in a position to solve the problem. Prayer may be the best you can do.
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roseproject
Guest
She was on medication for a good while (see post #25). She stopped taking them and refuses to get back on them. Part of it may be because she thinks that she doesn’t need medicine; that faith is all she needs. God blessed the world with doctors for a reason (as we’ve told her many a time).
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Little_Sheep
Guest
I agree with this post. I hope someone can encourage her to talk to a psychiatrist. This is not normal behavior and lots of mental illness begins to show itself at her age. I will keep you and your family in my prayers.
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