Balancing career with Faith

[cmscms]

Ok, I am not even sure what my point is but I really need to ramble. Please still read my post

Yesterday I volunteered to help low income people do their taxes. It was a selfish motive, so I could put it on my resume and network with professionals to help my career. (I won’t even go into my opnions about networking because I don’t think there is enough room on this forum for that post)

Well, a lady drove me there and back and when she went to drop me off, the first thing she did was shut off the motor so I knew I was in for a long discussion.

One thing she did was bring up how her father was totally against homosexually and abortion and she though her dad should live and let live a bit more. So I said in a diplomatic tone of voice ‘I can respect a difference of opinion but as a Catholic, I have a moral obligation to state I do think that is a sin’. To which she replied laughing ‘I know, I purposely said that because I wanted to see how you would handle it’

Well… all I could think is ‘The sad truth of the matter is, if I want a career, these are the type of people I need to put up with.’ And honestly, I am so fed up with the whole corporate mentality of want it is to be professional that I DON"T want a career. But as a sinlge woman, I need to earn a living. And I am so disillusioned by what I need to navigate around to have one.

And the worst thing is, this is lady is into ‘Corporate social responsibility’ and how that is the trend and companies need to be good to their employees if they want to stay in business. Give me a break. There is a recession out there and all employers know they have the cookie and people will put up with a lot to keep their job.

I would love to think she is just one bad apple and there are good professionals out there. However, I have met too many of her type.

I am so fed up with society placing a person’s value on what they do and how much money they have. I am the type, come quitting time I go home to my life. However, there is this unwritten rule that if you don’t go out socially with co-workers, you don’t go up the latter and in this economy, you actually have to do all the extras just to hold down your job.

I REALLY am trying hard to believe that God has His perfect plan for me and that if this is what is necessary for my spiritual well being I pray He gives me the strenght to carry out his plan. But how can this be His will? People putting on airs to look good?

This woman also proceeded to go on and on about her opinions on what corporations need to do. I tried to point out the reality that a lot of corporations actually put profit before morals and even though I agreed it was wrong, that is the society we lived in and I wanted to learn how to live in it rather than waste my time complaining about it. To which she replied that was my whole problem, even if I was in a good company I had an obligation to make sure all companies are good to their employees.

Well…I am not God, and I wil NEVER try to single handly change the world. I will do my part but come the weekend I will put things in his hands and have a bit of social fun. But it was very obvious every last one of her waking moments revolves around career. She did not seem to have any respect for someone who wants a social life.

ARGHHHH !!! I wish it were easier

 

[Irishmom2]

To which she replied laughing ‘I know, I purposely said that because I wanted to see how you would handle it’

Well isn’t she clever…

I think you handled that just fine if that is where it ended. Something tells me this woman loves to do this to you though. Don’t take the bait. Don’t feel that you need to get into an unwanted conversation either just because she drove you somewhere.

 

[cmscms]

Well isn’t she clever…

I think you handled that just fine if that is where it ended. Something tells me this woman loves to do this to you though. Don’t take the bait. Don’t feel that you need to get into an unwanted conversation either just because she drove you somewhere.

As much as I totally understand what you are saying, I am in a situation where I will have to be putting up with a lot of people like her for the next little while because of my ‘career’. ie because I have bills to pay.

I don’t suppose you have the winning lotery numbers

 

[AllSeasons]

Ok, I am not even sure what my point is but I really need to ramble. Please still read my post

I’m glad someone posted about this. I’ve often wondered about the same thing. I was in the corporate world and am about to head back in again in a few months.

Yesterday I volunteered to help low income people do their taxes. It was a selfish motive, so I could put it on my resume and network with professionals to help my career. (I won’t even go into my opnions about networking because I don’t think there is enough room on this forum for that post)

This sounds a little too familiar, I’m sorry to say. I’ve also padded my resume through volunteering. Granted, I didn’t volunteer just to pad my resume; I also did it, because I wanted to help people. I didn’t do too much networking, though, other than the leaders of the volunteer organization.

Well, a lady drove me there and back and when she went to drop me off, the first thing she did was shut off the motor so I knew I was in for a long discussion.

One thing she did was bring up how her father was totally against homosexually and abortion and she though her dad should live and let live a bit more. So I said in a diplomatic tone of voice ‘I can respect a difference of opinion but as a Catholic, I have a moral obligation to state I do think that is a sin’. To which she replied laughing ‘I know, I purposely said that because I wanted to see how you would handle it’

I can’t say I’ve gotten that exact same thing from my colleagues, though I’ve gotten grief about other things related to my faith, like living chastely before marriage. Sometimes, it definitely can get very awkward and personal.

Well… all I could think is ‘The sad truth of the matter is, if I want a career, these are the type of people I need to put up with.’ And honestly, I am so fed up with the whole corporate mentality of want it is to be professional that I DON"T want a career. But as a sinlge woman, I need to earn a living. And I am so disillusioned by what I need to navigate around to have one.

I’ve had the same thoughts, as well. This is one reason why I don’t talk about religion or politics at work. Sadly, other people don’t always follow this rule, and at times, I’m forced into discussions about such things. I usually try to remain reticent, because like you said, I need to earn a living. The workplace is not the best venue for proselytizing.

And the worst thing is, this is lady is into ‘Corporate social responsibility’ and how that is the trend and companies need to be good to their employees if they want to stay in business. Give me a break. There is a recession out there and all employers know they have the cookie and people will put up with a lot to keep their job.

I would have to respectfully disagree with you a bit on this particular issue. I do think that there is a place for CSR in the corporate world, provided of course that it makes economic sense. I do not see a for-profit business pursuing CSR at the detriment of their business and shareholders. But sometimes, if the idea of CSR is aligned with their business objectives, like Patagonia whose brand image is based on the outdoors, the environment, etc., it can work to their advantage. In today’s society, there is a segment of consumers who are conscious of the environment and CSR, so it’s perfectly fine for corporations to market to this particular market segment.

I would love to think she is just one bad apple and there are good professionals out there. However, I have met too many of her type.

Honestly, I think I’ve been lucky that I haven’t really come across too many people like that in the workplace, but then again, like I said, I don’t usually talk about religion, politics, or my personal life at work.

I am so fed up with society placing a person’s value on what they do and how much money they have. I am the type, come quitting time I go home to my life. However, there is this unwritten rule that if you don’t go out socially with co-workers, you don’t go up the latter and in this economy, you actually have to do all the extras just to hold down your job.

I agree. Society, in general, places way too much emphasis on people’s material wealthy in terms of their self-worth. I actually just attended a Bible study on this very topic. It’s important to realize that money itself is neutral, but the love of money is the real evil.

As far as networking outside of work is concerned, I think it is important to participate. It really can be detrimental to your career if you do not. If you are to climb the corporate ladder, then they will want to know what kind of person you really are, and that’s not always possible to do at the workplace. Apparently, people tend to divulge a lot more about themselves over a couple of beers. Who would’ve guessed?

I REALLY am trying hard to believe that God has His perfect plan for me and that if this is what is necessary for my spiritual well being I pray He gives me the strenght to carry out his plan. But how can this be His will? People putting on airs to look good?

It is really difficult at times to figure out what God’s plan is, much less how best to follow it. I’d like to think that God’s intention is for me to use the gifts He’s given me to do His will. If I am good at sales, or marketing, or finance, or whatever, then I take it to mean that perhaps I need to utilize these skills to make a difference, and in the process, please God. Anyway, that’s just my 2 cents.

 

[jmcrae]

As much as I totally understand what you are saying, I am in a situation where I will have to be putting up with a lot of people like her for the next little while because of my ‘career’. ie because I have bills to pay.

I don’t suppose you have the winning lotery numbers

I hear you. I don’t go to work to make friends, either - it’s to put food on the table, pay the bills, and support my real life at home with my family and my actual friends.

I’d much rather just focus on the task at hand, make the customer happy and keep a smile on the boss’s face, than get into any kind of a personal discussion with co-workers, whether it’s about religion or my taste in cars. It’s nobody’s business where I go to Church, or how I spend my own hard-earned money. I dislike nosy people who try to get into my business.

 

[BlueEyedLady]

I hear you. I don’t go to work to make friends, either - it’s to put food on the table, pay the bills, and support my real life at home with my family and my actual friends.

I’d much rather just focus on the task at hand, make the customer happy and keep a smile on the boss’s face, than get into any kind of a personal discussion with co-workers, whether it’s about religion or my taste in cars. It’s nobody’s business where I go to Church, or how I spend my own hard-earned money. I dislike nosy people who try to get into my business.

Maybe they just figure since you spend 40 hours a week together you might as well get to know each other and make it as enjoyable as possible? I really don’t understand responding to friendliness like that.

Religion and politics should be avoided, but really, your taste in cars is too personal for the people you spend 8 hours a day with?

 

[AllSeasons]

This woman also proceeded to go on and on about her opinions on what corporations need to do. I tried to point out the reality that a lot of corporations actually put profit before morals and even though I agreed it was wrong, that is the society we lived in and I wanted to learn how to live in it rather than waste my time complaining about it. To which she replied that was my whole problem, even if I was in a good company I had an obligation to make sure all companies are good to their employees.

I think she’s right in the sense that not all companies are the same in their moral compass. Some corporations, like Wall Street banks, are perhaps less scrupulous in their business practices; whereas other companies, who are known as good corporate citizens, tend to act differently. Of course, companies are focused on their bottom line and maximizing shareholder value, but I choose to believe that there are still some good apples left in the corporate world.

God bless you.

 

[TheRealJuliane]

This woman also proceeded to go on and on about her opinions on what corporations need to do. ** I tried to point out the reality that a lot of corporations actually put profit before morals and even though I agreed it was wrong**, that is the society we lived in and I wanted to learn how to live in it rather than waste my time complaining about it. To which she replied that was my whole problem, even if I was in a good company I had an obligation to make sure all companies are good to their employees.

People are confused as to what a corporation is. A corporation exists in order to make a profit. Not to serve humanity, although the products or service the corporation sells MAY serve humanity. If a corporation does not make a profit, it ceases to exist. It is not greed for a corporation to make a profit. It is like saying a dog is greedy because it eats the food you put in front of it. Corporations reflect the societal values they are formed within, because a corporation is formed by people, but a corporation is NOT the people that formed it.

Get it out of your head that corporations are either greedy or good. They are neither, they are either profitable or unprofitable.

 

[TheRealJuliane]

Maybe they just figure since you spend 40 hours a week together you might as well get to know each other and make it as enjoyable as possible? I really don’t understand responding to friendliness like that.

Religion and politics should be avoided, but really, your taste in cars is too personal for the people you spend 8 hours a day with?

Cmscms is evidently a more private person than you are. To each their own. She already gives at least 40 hours a week to her co-workers and does not relish giving up even one more hour in what she views as pointless socializing. She focuses on the task at hand, not on getting along with everyone. Nothing wrong with that at all.

 

[Bartolome_Casas]

I liked your question. I could really related to it. Here’s my answer. Hope you like it:

(1) There’s a long tradition in the Catholic Church as seeing most lay people as being mired down in all sorts of sins and vices. That’s why so few lay people ever get canonized as saints, some say. So, don’t be naive about the general sinfulness of great mass of people in general. The great mass of political liberals are sinners. The great mass of political conservatives are sinners. This is all stated over and over in the Bible. Your own experiences is verifying it. But if you get sick of dealing with sinners, you will have to move into a convent. And even that won’t work, and you’ll find some pretty vicious sinners among your fellow nuns (just read the life of St. Terese the the Little Flower!).

(2) Yet, don’t despair. There are some pretty saintly lay people here and there.

(3) Big secret: The sinfulness, pettiness, selfishness, laziness, anger, greediness, etc., of OTHER people is NOT the REAL cause of most of the suffering you and I experience in this journey through this world. No, rather it is OUR OWN sinfulness, pettiness, selfishness, laziness, anger, greediness, etc., that is the REAL, deep, underlying cause of most of what we suffer. We get confused, because we do quite often receive suffering through the immediate medium of other people. But they are not the real “devil.” It is us. That is why the Bible is always ABOVE ALL CALLING us to personal repentance. That is why Jesus told us to take the log out of our own eye first. That is why Jesus told the parable of the Pharisee and the tax collector (publican) both going to the temple to pray at the same time, with the prideful Pharisee feeling superior to the sinful tax collector, but the sinful but humble tax collector’s prayers being the ones that move God to mercy. When I really look at my life, I see that it is not all the angry “looney” Left Wingers or the angry “looney” Right Wingers who are the cause of my misery: It is angry “looney” ME.

(4) PLEASE don’t look for life satisfaction from WORK or the social life that workplaces provide. Woman, you need a spouse, or need to get in a religious order, or else you are in for a lonely, sad, frustrating journey through life in this world! Ek! Is that too bold? Or is that loving advice in the “tough love” mode? I speak from much painful personal experience, and many observations of my fellow pilgrims in the world.

Well, sorry for my sad, sorry, pitiful answer. Maybe someone else will give you a good answer. You deserve it.

Best wishes!

 

[BlueEyedLady]

Cmscms is evidently a more private person than you are. To each their own. She already gives at least 40 hours a week to her co-workers and does not relish giving up even one more hour in what she views as pointless socializing. She focuses on the task at hand, not on getting along with everyone. Nothing wrong with that at all.

You can focus on the task at hand while engaging in pleasantries. I’m not saying you have to do happy hour every week, but listening to a quick joke at the water cooler or giving a little asked for advice on Ford vs. Chevy is not exactly burdensome. A smile and some friendly chat goes a long way towards making work a little more pleasant.

There’s a reason that most large corporations have mandatory team building and socialization. It boosts worker happiness and productivity. Granted, it can easily go too far.

Oh, and she doesn’t “give her coworkers 40 hours”. She works with them by her own choice. Making it sound like its a privilege for her coworkers to get that much time out of her is weird.

 

[Stumblesalot]

Ok, I am not even sure what my point is but I really need to ramble. Please still read my post

Yesterday I volunteered to help low income people do their taxes. It was a selfish motive, so I could put it on my resume and network with professionals to help my career. (I won’t even go into my opnions about networking because I don’t think there is enough room on this forum for that post)

Well, a lady drove me there and back and when she went to drop me off, the first thing she did was shut off the motor so I knew I was in for a long discussion.

One thing she did was bring up how her father was totally against homosexually and abortion and she though her dad should live and let live a bit more. So I said in a diplomatic tone of voice ‘I can respect a difference of opinion but as a Catholic, I have a moral obligation to state I do think that is a sin’. To which she replied laughing ‘I know, I purposely said that because I wanted to see how you would handle it’

Well… all I could think is ‘The sad truth of the matter is, if I want a career, these are the type of people I need to put up with.’ And honestly, I am so fed up with the whole corporate mentality of want it is to be professional that I DON"T want a career. But as a sinlge woman, I need to earn a living. And I am so disillusioned by what I need to navigate around to have one.

And the worst thing is, this is lady is into ‘Corporate social responsibility’ and how that is the trend and companies need to be good to their employees if they want to stay in business. Give me a break. There is a recession out there and all employers know they have the cookie and people will put up with a lot to keep their job.

I would love to think she is just one bad apple and there are good professionals out there. However, I have met too many of her type.

I am so fed up with society placing a person’s value on what they do and how much money they have. I am the type, come quitting time I go home to my life. However, there is this unwritten rule that if you don’t go out socially with co-workers, you don’t go up the latter and in this economy, you actually have to do all the extras just to hold down your job.

I REALLY am trying hard to believe that God has His perfect plan for me and that if this is what is necessary for my spiritual well being I pray He gives me the strenght to carry out his plan. But how can this be His will? People putting on airs to look good?

This woman also proceeded to go on and on about her opinions on what corporations need to do. I tried to point out the reality that a lot of corporations actually put profit before morals and even though I agreed it was wrong, that is the society we lived in and I wanted to learn how to live in it rather than waste my time complaining about it. To which she replied that was my whole problem, even if I was in a good company I had an obligation to make sure all companies are good to their employees.

Well…I am not God, and I wil NEVER try to single handly change the world. I will do my part but come the weekend I will put things in his hands and have a bit of social fun. But it was very obvious every last one of her waking moments revolves around career. She did not seem to have any respect for someone who wants a social life.

ARGHHHH !!! I wish it were easier

Hi,

I know exactly what you mean. The corporate world is obsessed with chasing the material elements of this world. I always remember George Bush junior, when asked about the USA’s major contribution to global pollution and climate change, retorting “I am only concerned with the economy”. What a short sighted view these people have. I genuinely believe, and I can assure you I have profound knowledge of this particular area, that terms such as ‘corporate responsibility’ and ‘sustainability’ are simply buzz-words for the MAJORITY of organisations. Governments allow these companies to be self regulating and choose their own internal performance indicators (which they select for the purposes of enhancing company image, whilst doing little in real terms, and maximising company profit). Indeed, I felt the same as you. I had a choice between my career and my conscience. I have since left my employment, but on the bright side I have plenty of time to attend mass and pray during lent ha ha.

God bless

 

[cmscms]

I would have to respectfully disagree with you a bit on this particular issue. I do think that there is a place for CSR in the corporate world, provided of course that it makes economic sense. .

That is my point. They are only doing it to increase profits, yet they want us to think it is because they care. I don’t like the hypocrisy

As far as networking outside of work is concerned, I think it is important to participate. It really can be detrimental to your career if you do not. .

Again, that is my point. I want to be able to enjoy life and not constantly look over my shoulder to see who heard what I said and worry it will affect my career

 

[Julian0404]

Just one word of caution: People are being fired for discussing their faith in a “work environment”, and many times they are being “pulled into” such discussion rather than initiate them. If anyone at work starts discussing faith and requests your (name removed by moderator)ut “red flag” moment.

I would advise that in any “work environment” i.e. from the time you leave your house to returning to your house, you simply indicate that discussing your faith while in a “work environment” is not proper, and if she would like to meet for coffee, in a neutral non-work environment on a non-work day, then you would be happy to share. Sad, but it is the “work environment” we live in.

 

[cmscms]

Maybe they just figure since you spend 40 hours a week together you might as well get to know each other and make it as enjoyable as possible? I really don’t understand responding to friendliness like that.

Religion and politics should be avoided, but really, your taste in cars is too personal for the people you spend 8 hours a day with?

There is NOTHING wrong with being friendly with your co-workers. However depending on the office, the sad truth of the matter is discussing your car CAN easily become heated. Especailly for a man who works with other men who get their value out of the car they drive.

For the longest time I did not own a car. I can’t even begin to tell about how often I was the butt of rude comments because of it. People thinking they are being friendly when they tell me for a car loan and totally disregarding my choice of lifestyle to pay cash for everything.

It is very hard to practice live and let live and some topics are best to be avoided

CM

 

[cmscms]

(4) PLEASE don’t look for life satisfaction from WORK or the social life that workplaces provide. Woman, you need a spouse, or need to get in a religious order, or else you are in for a lonely, sad, frustrating journey through life in this world! Ek! Is that too bold? Or is that loving advice in the “tough love” mode? I speak from much painful personal experience, and many observations of my fellow pilgrims in the world.

Well, sorry for my sad, sorry, pitiful answer. Maybe someone else will give you a good answer. You deserve it.

Best wishes!

No I don’t like your answer but I do appreciate your effort. I think you TOTALLY missed the whole point of my post. I have NOT looked for personal satisfaction from work in over 15 years. I go to earn an honest living. My complaint is I feel that going to work, doing my job, and going home is no longer an option. I feel there are subtle pressures to fit into a click to remain employed. I was never into cliques and my concern is my honesty and insistence everybody be accountable for their behaviour is going to harm me career wise

CM

 

[cmscms]

You can focus on the task at hand while engaging in pleasantries. I’m not saying you have to do happy hour every week, but listening to a quick joke at the water cooler or giving a little asked for advice on Ford vs. Chevy is not exactly burdensome. A smile and some friendly chat goes a long way towards making work a little more pleasant…

I don’t have a problem with a litle social talk but… as in my other post, the sad truth is, Ford vs Chevy can get heated in some situations and I avoid those conversations

 

[cmscms]

Just one word of caution: People are being fired for discussing their faith in a “work environment”, and many times they are being “pulled into” such discussion rather than initiate them. If anyone at work starts discussing faith and requests your (name removed by moderator)ut “red flag” moment.

I would advise that in any “work environment” i.e. from the time you leave your house to returning to your house, you simply indicate that discussing your faith while in a “work environment” is not proper, and if she would like to meet for coffee, in a neutral non-work environment on a non-work day, then you would be happy to share. Sad, but it is the “work environment” we live in.

I see your point but I would rather spend my non work time not associating with people who want to criticizes the church

CM

 

[TheRealJuliane]

There is NOTHING wrong with being friendly with your co-workers. However depending on the office, the sad truth of the matter is discussing your car CAN easily become heated. Especailly for a man who works with other men who get their value out of the car they drive.

For the longest time I did not own a car. I can’t even begin to tell about how often I was the butt of rude comments because of it. People thinking they are being friendly when they tell me for a car loan and totally disregarding my choice of lifestyle to pay cash for everything.

It is very hard to practice live and let live and some topics are best to be avoided

CM

I have no idea why I assumed that you are a female! Sorry about that.

 

[cmscms]

I have no idea why I assumed that you are a female! Sorry about that.

I AM a female. I was simply responding to jmcrae because I think he is male