M
mVitus
Guest
Banned because sometimes it’s better to tell and not show. (Example: Sandra’s heart sank as she though about her father, barely recognizable through the jungle of tubes, back in the hospital as she ate smores with the other girls around the fire. VS Sandra’s heart sank as she though about her father, barely recognizable through the jungle of tubes, back in the hospital as she ate melted marshmallow goodness with slightly melted chocolate gushing over crunchy graham crackers with the other girls around the fire.) The second one really detracts from Sandra’s worrying about her father.