I have listened to Scott Hahn’s Father Knows Best CD over 10 times. Both of the things mentioned are in that recording. However I think what was said puts Scott’s words out of context. In the CD I mentioned he doesn’t say the Holy Spirit is female, he likens the mother of a family (any god fearing family) to the Holy Spirit. You really need to listen to it. It is a strong correlation; God made the human family to resemble His family.
Again, not that the Trinity is a family (though Father Son and Holy Spirit are indeed the language of family) but that the family, the traditional family, can be correlated to the Trinity. Each member has a specific purpose, a specific role, that contributes to the unity, communion, of the domestic church.
Perhaps I don’t relate it well enough. Hear it for yourself!