Birth control after fornication

[Michael16]

@MyApologies

If you’re discerning Marriage with this woman; you’re responsible to God for her soul. You have to be the priest and king in this situation and keep her spotless before God.

You have to be the strong one for both you and her.

 

[MyApologies]

Reminds me of what my priest said in confession yesterday.

 

[CaptFun]

1 Corinthians 7:9

You’re welcome.

If you and your girlfriend are of similar mind and inclination in wanting not only to do what is right … yet finding it hard to keep apart … St. Paul recommends … marriage. Why not be happy instead of guilty.

Can you imagine having a baby with her? And vice versa? Letting God be part of that unity?

Hope it all works out. My for you both in trying to do the right things.

:couplekiss_man_woman: + =

 

[Michael16]

@MyApologies

I have to do the same thing for my fiancé. If you truly love her, you’ll help her get to heaven and preserve her from mortal sin.

 

[MiserereMeiDei]

Is it morally ok to use contraception if having already committed the sin of fornication for the purpose of preventing pregnancy?

No.

As for fornication, avoid near occasions of sin, i.e. don’t be alone together. If you don’t intend to avoid near occasions of sin in your making of a firm amendment of life then as I understand it, your confession may be invalid. Asking if you can use birth control is a bad sign.

 

[Maximus_Power]

I had the same problem. Take the path of least resistance and get married quickly.

 

[MiserereMeiDei]

Bathsheba

Pardon my Hebraism. I spent a lot of time in Orthodox Jewish shuls prior to my reversion. Some old habits die hard.

Thanks, I forgot about the manner of conception of Solomon’s deceased older sibling.

 

[MiserereMeiDei]

Bethsabee and Uriae Hethaei are definitely odd to me. I’m working on learning Latin now. Hopefully I’ll have something of an understanding of it in a couple years.

Apparently someone was offended by my error. I wonder if they’ll have your post removed for quoting it. Lol.

 

[MiserereMeiDei]

Thanks. That was the first Catholic bible I purchased and the one I trust the most, same publisher and everything. I was really sad I couldn’t use my grandmother’s though. I used to go through it once in a while when I was a kid. I suspect it was also DR. Hopefully whichever family member has it will make good use of it eventually.

I just received a copy of Collins’ A Primer of Ecclesiastical Latin. My priest recommended it.

 

[PennyinCanada]

It is a LOT harder not to have sex if you know she’s been on the pill for a few months.

 

[IdaCatholic]

1. There is no reason to keep “falling” to this temptation. You are risking your entire soul and the soul of the person you claim to love. Just stop. Period.
2. I’m always saddened by the lack of simple moral logic with some situations. OP, not trying to pick on you but if you rob a bank there is no moral logical justification for then shooting the guard. One should not think, “I’ve already robbed the bank, and the guard has seen my face so since I’m already in sin, I’ll shoot him.”

The simple answer here is STOP THE SIN.

 

[PennyinCanada]

God made sex to be the superglue to keep married couples together when the going gets tough. When you have sex before it’s time, it really clouds your judgement. It makes it hard to see that this person is a bad match for you. They ignored that their close friends and maybe siblings too were pointing out stuff that they were concerned about. We see it here to on Catholic Answers, someone coming on and talking about their boyfriend/girlfriend and they have a baby together already and they don’t know what to do. Let this be a modern day parable, learn from it, and make the decision not to get this all messed up. Enjoy your dating time, honor God, think clearly. No regrets.

 

[QwertyGirl]

Doesn’t seem, from the responses here, anybody is thinking about the unwanted baby that could result from the reality of what is happening here. Yes, in a perfect world, babies are welcomed. However we don’t live in a perfect world. Please do whatever you need to do to prevent an unwanted baby from being born. Most posters here would say that means no sex. You have to be the one who decides.

 

[TheLittleLady]

I would pray that any child conceived by parents who are unable to care for it would be placed with a loving adoptive family

 

[QwertyGirl]

Of course. But often times, not likely in this situation.

 

[MiserereMeiDei]

This is not a catholic response. You should let OP know that next time. People don’t always check the avatar.

 

[QwertyGirl]

It is Catholic. I didn’t promote abortion or birth control or pre-marital sex. . I suggested the morality, or lack there of, of bringing an unwanted baby into the world should be considered.

 

[MiserereMeiDei]

Please do whatever you need to do to prevent an unwanted baby from being born. Most posters here would say that means no sex. You have to be the one who decides.

An unwanted baby isn’t immoral (though not perceiving a child as a blessing might be since it is a refutation of God’s pronouncement to the contrary) . Sex outside of marriage is immoral. Telling someone to do “whatever you need to do to prevent an unwanted pregnancy” implies options that are sinful. Or did you forget to exclude sinful options like contraception?

 

[halogirl]

OP, let this give you pause for thought. Stop what you are doing and think very carefully about the consequences of your actions. Three peoples’ lives minimum will be affected by this (you, her, potential baby)

 

[MiserereMeiDei]

As I said. Not catholic. I’d say more but typing on my phone stinks. I’ll probably edit later.

[edit incoming]

I beg to differ. I believe bringing an unwanted baby into the world is more immoral than using birth control.

You might well think that but that doesn’t comport with Catholic teaching. It is merely your opinion, and not something that is in keeping with the intent of OP to seek a Catholic response.

The Church doesn’t really weigh in on this.

That is highly fallacious. The Church has plenty to say about both sex outside marriage being prohibited as well as prohibiting the use of artificial contraception to prevent conception. Neither is permissible. The Church also teaches that one may not commit an intrinsically evil act under any circumstance. The use of artificial contraception with the intent to prevent conception is intrinsically evil and thus prohibited.

Finally, the church teaches that children are a blessing, unlike this fallen world that seems to want to prevent them or kill them at every turn.

The Church would say it is sinful to not accept a baby that results from sex.

I must admit that I don’t know what you mean by accept. If you mean the Church would not accept killing it, then we are agreed. If you mean that the Church teaches one must keep and raise the child, no she does not. Putting the child up for adoption is a perfectly moral and valid option.

The Church also says it is sinful to use birth control.

Yes.

I don’t believe it weighs on on which is more sinful, though.

It wouldn’t be relevant anyway, since sin is prohibited. Committing two grave sins is worse than committing one, but yeah, it only takes one to go to hell. Moral relativism is for those without moorings.

Considerations to think about for the couple who is having sex.

Not really. Certainly not for Catholics. Which is why I stated your answer isn’t Catholic and you should inform people coming to a Catholic forum looking for “Catholic Answers” that you are not providing an answer from a Catholic perspective.

ETA: Whoever flagged may wish to work on reading comprehension.

No worries. It’s fully quoted in my response…unless they flag this as well. Flaggers seem to have all the power. You even get a reward for flagging. It’s pretty gross in my opinion.