K
kdragonfly
Guest
Another question - would I have to give up ABC before getting confirmed? I’m guessing I should talk to the priest about it… I have no intention of being a fake Catholic or lying.
- Status
K
kib
Guest
You would not be in a state of grace if you used ABC and continued a sexual relationship. There wouldn’t be much point in continuing on at that point. Definitely go have a chat with your priest!
C
cviolette
Guest
Don’t give up. Do not go to communion if you are using ABC. Research NFP. Pray the rosary. Go to mass as often as possible. Go to confession. Talk to your priest.
C
CountrySinger
Guest
Is it easy to do though, I’m very tempted to start ABC. My best friend (the most devout Catholic woman I know), told me that I’m stupid to take NFP classes and that she uses ABC.
If a devout Catholic uses ABC, why does a Catholic-In-Name-Only (Me) have to use NFP? It sucks. I don’t trust NFP at all. And our teachers have two kids in three years!
Failure rate much? It is like taking dieting tips from a fat person.Side note: I don’t receive Communion. So put down the stones.
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mark_a
Guest
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cviolette
Guest
LOL! I am one of the last people to throw stones. There are many weeks were I can not receive communion. And I was on ABC at 16 years old. I am really struggling with my own issues and thankfully I have a great spiritual director that is guiding and supporting me. I think I am a full time job for him. Just wanted to let her know that she shouldn’t receive communion. Not judging.
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LemonAndLime
Guest
I use ABC and I’m happy with using it because the side-effects have reduced a negative effect a medical condition had on me. I’m also sexually active. But I want to be a Catholic.
So I guess I can never have communion? Not sure I can be a Catholic then, I would feel dishonest.
So I guess I can never have communion? Not sure I can be a Catholic then, I would feel dishonest.
M
mark_a
Guest
You are getting a lot of good info here. It’s a lot to get your head around.I’m a little scared to post this because I’ve seen a couple of rude comments in a few other threads… so try to handle with care or at the very least don’t be rude…
I am 100 percent again abortion because it is the ending of a life that has begun. However, I do not see what is wrong about birth control - it is preventing the beginning of a life, not ending a life. My husband and I are not ready to have children right now for a variety of personal reasons that I am not going to get into. Are we really supposed to remain celibate for years because of this? I find that completely absurd. And what of the couples that already have several children? Do they simply stop having sex after having a couple of kids?
Please be honest… because you don’t find a lot of Catholic families with 6 or more kids anymore… so I’m SURE I’m not the only person who feels this way.
To give you a bit of my background - I was born and raised Catholic until the age of 10. My family left the faith, and I’m now 30 years old and have just started going to church again. So I’m a new/old Catholic… or I suppose a cradle Catholic (I saw that term going around in here, and I think that would probably apply to me, though I didn’t really have any say in my family leaving Catholicism). So I’m still fairly new to some of the doctrines, customs, etc. Thanks for bearing with me!
Sometime in the future after you come to understand (but not necessarily convinced of) Catholic teaching on contraception, please have a look at these articles.
For the biblical basis of the teachings against contraception:
rtforum.org/lt/lt67.html
On how Protestantism abandoned traditional Jewish and 1900 years of Christian teaching concerning contraception:
touchstonemag.com/archives/article.php?id=20-04-020-f
There’s a lot of valuable information in them, even if ultimately you can’t believe in the Catholic teaching about contraception.
Best wishes!!
H
HickmanJosh
Guest
Pope JP2 spoke at Wednesday most audiences for the first five years of his pontificate on human sexuality, these have been gathered into a work called the Theology of the Body. Christopher West has released a book on this called the Theology of the Body for Beginners. In this he specifically examines contraception and why the church believes it to be an evil. I just read it and found it fascinating.I’m a little scared to post this because I’ve seen a couple of rude comments in a few other threads… so try to handle with care or at the very least don’t be rude…
I am 100 percent again abortion because it is the ending of a life that has begun. However, I do not see what is wrong about birth control - it is preventing the beginning of a life, not ending a life. My husband and I are not ready to have children right now for a variety of personal reasons that I am not going to get into. Are we really supposed to remain celibate for years because of this? I find that completely absurd. And what of the couples that already have several children? Do they simply stop having sex after having a couple of kids?
Please be honest… because you don’t find a lot of Catholic families with 6 or more kids anymore… so I’m SURE I’m not the only person who feels this way.
To give you a bit of my background - I was born and raised Catholic until the age of 10. My family left the faith, and I’m now 30 years old and have just started going to church again. So I’m a new/old Catholic… or I suppose a cradle Catholic (I saw that term going around in here, and I think that would probably apply to me, though I didn’t really have any say in my family leaving Catholicism). So I’m still fairly new to some of the doctrines, customs, etc. Thanks for bearing with me!
Anyways here is a radio conversation with Jason Evert who speaks on Chasity and NFP. In this speficic conversation he speaks on Contraception youtube.com/watch?v=oplzfUlJVVY&feature=related
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heart4home
Guest
OK, I’m seriously not trying to judge somebody here, but just going by what you have said, I had to laugh at you calling your friend devout. If she’s using ABC and taking communion each week, then she is not being faithful to the teachings of the Church, and devout would not be one of the top adjectives that would seem suitable to describe her faith.Is it easy to do though, I’m very tempted to start ABC. My best friend (the most devout Catholic woman I know), told me that I’m stupid to take NFP classes and that she uses ABC.
If a devout Catholic uses ABC, why does a Catholic-In-Name-Only (Me) have to use NFP? It sucks. I don’t trust NFP at all. And our teachers have two kids in three years!
Side note: I don’t receive Communion. So put down the stones.
C
CountrySinger
Guest
In her defense, she puts up with me, so that makes her a saint.
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HickmanJosh
Guest
in addition, this link lists Scriptures relating to contraception plus has quotes from the Church fathers
scripturecatholic.com/contraception.html
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heart4home
Guest
I know you have just returned to the Church. If you haven’t already then your first step would be going to reconciliation again before you can take communion since in the Church’s opinion you have always been Catholic and have been sinning each week that you have missed Mass and whatever other sins you have committed over the years including using ABC. Of course you would also need to stop using ABC.
NFP when practiced properly can be very successful(as much so or more so than ABC) and can really strengthen the marital bond since it takes the commitment of both spouses to be successful.
Yes you are correct that you do see many small families in many parishes today. Some of them may be struggling with infertility, some may be practicing NFP on a regular basis as they feel they have grave reason to not have more children for whatever reason, and sadly yes some are either using ABC or have had a permanent sterilization done of one spouse then gone to reconciliation and confessed their sin over it and then returned to taking the Eucharist each week… It’s amazing to me how many admit to this last one. Of course only God knows if they are truly repentant or not.
God Bless you on your journey home. Don’t be discouraged. Take your time to learn all you can and pray pray pray.
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heart4home
Guest
Are you married? Being sexually active outside of marriage is definitely a sin and you can not take communion as you would not be in a state of Grace.
As for using ABC for a medical condition other than trying to prevent a pregnancy I believe that may be permissible. I may be wrong so please check with your priest and don’t just take my word on it, but if I understand correctly if there are absolutely no other alternatives to treat your condition then it is allowable.
Of course your true intent will be known by and judged by God.
T
TobyLue
Guest
in regards to some people limiting themselves to small families, there are many reasons why some Catholics practice NFP, but NFP is NOT to be used as a contraceptive but to space out children. My nephew who is not by any means rich and has a small house offered his family up to the Lord and have the Lord decide how many children they would have. They have 8 children, (lost the second one to a miscarriage) but by putting their trust in the Lord they have managed. See what people can do by trusting in the Lord, these are his kids all eight of them. They always give witness when they perform as to how the Lord had worked in their lives and what a blessing it is to have a large family. BTW, one of the violin players is my godson. He takes his good looks from his godfather (heh)
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kib
Guest
If she’s using ABC she’s not a devout Catholic, she’s making her own religion. No one is forcing you to practice the Catholic faith.Is it easy to do though, I’m very tempted to start ABC. My best friend (the most devout Catholic woman I know), told me that I’m stupid to take NFP classes and that she uses ABC.
If a devout Catholic uses ABC, why does a Catholic-In-Name-Only (Me) have to use NFP? It sucks. I don’t trust NFP at all. And our teachers have two kids in three years!
Side note: I don’t receive Communion. So put down the stones.
C
cviolette
Guest
I had to confess permanent sterilization. This was a big problem with my husband and me. He did not even want me to go to confession because he was concerned the priest would say we could not have sex or I needed to get it reversed. Then he wanted to go to confession with me to explain that the doctor said that I should not have any children because of health risk. 4 c-sections. All tough pregnancies and deliveries. Last one was a very tough recovery.
I went to confession and still did not feel right. The priest said that it was decision between my doctor and my husband whether or not I get it reversed. My husband and I have argued about it. He is 50 years old and does not want more children. I would be okay with more children. I would love to get my tubal ligation reversed but it doesn’t look like it will happen
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kib
Guest
If you’re using an oral contraceptive you may be killing your children.
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CountrySinger
Guest
I know that. Believe me, I get closer to leave the Church for good everyday. If it wasn’t for my fiance, I would have left months ago.
I’m taking the NFP class, because he wants to use NFP, and I told him that he is the head of our future household. I can moan and whine, but it is his decision. And I stand by my man (and he does know that I’m having doubts about my faith).
But the temptation for the easy way out is there. It’s my love for my fiance that I haven’t already got a birth control pill prescription filled.
K
kib
Guest
Well praise God for that. I pray that you will soon find peace with our faith.I know that. Believe me, I get closer to leave the Church for good everyday. If it wasn’t for my fiance, I would have left months ago.
I’m taking the NFP class, because he wants to use NFP, and I told him that he is the head of our future household. I can moan and whine, but it is his decision. And I stand by my man (and he does know that I’m having doubts about my faith).
- Status