Brothers 5th Wedding

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If it was my brother or sister, I wouldn’t attend. There’s obviously a problem with his relationships.
 
Just tell him you care more about your religion and your faith, than you do about attending a family event that honors him and his fiance. It doesn’t sound like you care much about it, so just be truthful and put it that way to him. Then when the sixth wedding comes around, he will know not to invite or expect you to be there.

I have to suspect that because you’re asking here there’s more to the story then what you presented. You don’t have to share what it is, but I would suggest you think it through carefully. Family alienation can be a really terrible thing.
 
There is nothing wrong or sinful about you attending the wedding. Some weddings that take place in the Catholic Church also turn out to be invalid. Indeed, sometimes the families, aware of certain problems between the couple’s, already suspect this. But they go to the weddings anyway.

Preserving family unity is a good thing. Being kind and charitable are good things. Likely, your brother knows Church teaching and will decide to ignore it regardless of what you say or do.
 
But you aren’t getting married. Your brother is. You’re not breaking a sacrament. I think you should go.

But it’s your brother. I don’t care if you lose him. He’s not my brother
 
How many times was the bride married before ?
I hope he told his bride to be - he’s somewhat ‘unstable ‘ in relationships.
I wonder if he keeps the wedding day photos, of his other brides, around -
To me, he seems to be acting almost blasphemous-
 
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This is something you will need to pray and discern over.
the Church doesn’t give either a hard “no”, nor a firm “yes” in these situations.
You have a brother who isn’t around much. Who seem to have a problem with the foreverness of marriage. Who has no problem giving you hostility towards your faith.
On the other hand, you have a brother. I would presume that you love him and he loves you, too.

He knows how you feel about all his serial marriages?
You need to weigh and balance the possibility of giving scandal against the possible damage this could cause the relationship you and your brother and other family members have…

I knew of a devout Catholic who wound up going to her daughter’s same sex marriage because she had been threatened with never seeing her grandkids again. And she was the only Catholic influence in their lives.

Pray pray and pray.
 
Well people like that would probably never let their kids hear about God or morality from the grandmother anyway. Poor woman. What’s the point in forcing her to attend despite her beliefs?
 
LivingInJMJ said:
I love my brother but I cannot attend the wedding as it is outside the Church and it is number 5.

Thank you for your time.

Melissa
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Tell him “no thanks, I’ll wait for the next one…”

Really, at this point, IMO he’s no longer getting “married again” - he’s simply making a mockery of the entire institute of marriage and helping to desacralize and destroy it.

You are making the right choice not attending.
 
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if the wedding is local; i can’t see any harm in you attending it

it is basically a party w/ free food & drink

i think both you & your brother know it is sacramentally meaningless…
 
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If any of you know what I’m talking… 😉
 
It sounds like, while he was baptized Catholic, he subjectively isn’t Catholic.

Personally, I believe the wedding boycott is only a good idea when it will HELP someone maintain their Catholic faith or marry in the Church.

If it’s NOT going to make a difference or all it’s going to do it paint you and/or Catholics in a bad light, it’s not worth doing.

Remember: the objective of the boycott is to send a message that will eventually have a POSITIVE affect.

Because your brother isn’t subjectively Catholic, it might not be worth the fallout.
 
In 20 years when wife # 7 dumps him, when he has little to hang on to, when he realizes the waste his life without God is, and when you are still (hopefully) married to your current spouse, you might be the only bible he will be able to read and reclaim, if not his life, at least his soul. Something to think about???
 
LivingInJMJ said:
We are not close and we do not talk on a regular basis. I am not close to his fiancé, but we do talk online, once and awhile.

My brother was Baptized as a child into the Roman Catholic Faith. That is as far as the walk went. My husband and I are Roman Catholics and very active in our Faith. My brother is aware of this and has an issue with me being devoted to the Church.
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He is hostile to your (our) religion, yet people think you should attend his (most likely) invalid marriage?

If you don’t attend, I will “have your back”.
 
phil19034 said:
It sounds like, while he was baptized Catholic, he subjectively isn’t Catholic.

Personally, I believe the wedding boycott is only a good idea when it will HELP someone maintain their Catholic faith or marry in the Church.

If it’s NOT going to make a difference or all it’s going to do it paint you and/or Catholics in a bad light, it’s not worth doing.

Remember: the objective of the boycott is to send a message that will eventually have a POSITIVE affect.

Because your brother isn’t subjectively Catholic, it might not be worth the fallout.
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Not necessarily. It is about the people doing the “boycott” not sharing in the sin of the other party.
 
A simple “thank you for thinking of us but we will be unable to attend” should suffice.

No need to go into any elaborate reasons why. His invitation was simple. Your reply should be the same.
 
AngelaMarie said:
A simple “thank you for thinking of us but we will be unable to attend” should suffice.

No need to go into any elaborate reasons why. His invitation was simple. Your reply should be the same.
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I did similar (just simply declined without an explanation) when invited to my cousin’s second wedding - held at the racetrack!
 
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billy15 said:
Also, do you have children? We have to give our kids a good witness. When I was younger, my one cousin got a divorce from her husband. This was in the Catholic Church. So when invitations came to us for her second wedding outside the Church, my parents did not attend and neither did we. They did this out of love. They couldn’t celebrate my cousins new “wedding” while her true husband was still living. Try to weigh your options, pray, and use the virtue of prudence. As others have mentioned, you missed the first four. Also, loving someone is to will the good of another. Keep that in mind to.
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It sounds like you had great parents. I don’t see what their is to pray about the OP made it clear it goes against her concious so she won’t be going.

OP I admire your decision. If he won’t return calls or emails, doesn’t sound like he needs much more than returning the invitaion with ‘no’ checked
 
goout said:
NP.

I have a gay sister who had a civil union a number of years ago.

I went because I love my sister. She knows exactly what we believe and she respects our beliefs.
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I’d do the same.
 
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