Budgets...blown it again

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I’m having a really hard time with budgetting. I recently got a new job so I am able to pay my bills. However, I have $9000 of student loans ($4000 of which I have to pay off by the end of August). I need a new computer since mine has officially given up the ghost. The money I make at my new job is just enough to pay rent, monthly bills but not enough to save.
The problem here is I can’t keep to a budget for the life of me. Neither can my husband, who offers to help me, but at the end of the month, I end up helping him with what little money I can afford because he is the same as me…can’t keep to a budget. I know I can’t be there 24/7 to remind him of the budget (and he can’t be there for me either ).
Part of the reason for my inability is due to the fact that I was raised in a very wealthy home, where budget was non-exsistent. I bought anything I wanted, and had no need to save. Until i got married and subsequently, disowned by said family. So I guess I’m saying, I’m waaay to new at this.
I read in other threads that family’s with 4 children etc. can live off of $20,000 /year or less. How is this possible?
Does any one have any suggestions on how to do this??? I’ve already searched other threads but nothing directly about budgetting has been mentioned (unless I gave up too soon).

Thanks
Sarc
 
The best money-saving advice I can offer is this:

Spend money only as a last resort!

It’s basically a mindset that you have to adopt in order to save on a meager income. Consider how you might respond to the following problems:
  1. Your jacket has a whole worn in it. Do you replace it or patch it?
  2. You need groceries. Do you prepare a list or simply pick up what looks good?
  3. It’s 9 at night and you realize you forgot to run an errand. Do you run it then, or do you combine it with the next day’s driving? (you’d be surprised how much gas–and therefore money–this saves)
 
Set down with a sheet of paper.

On the left side top put your monthly TAKE HOME pay.

On the right, list your expenses - the NEEDS

Rent (never more than 1/3 your take home pay, if it is more than that, your budget will be upside down from day one).

Utilities (Cable TV and Cell phones do NOT count here, they are luxuries)

Food (about $5 per day per person, if you cook at home and shop wisely)

Tithe, Savings

Clothing (this should be a very small amount each month, and something you stick to like it is the law - no more than $25 per person per month for a couple -)

If you live where there is a good public transportatin system, you can live without a car. so, figure your fares.

Anything outside of these is a luxury. A computer is a luxury…

DON’T eat out, don’t grab a cup of coffee at Starbucks, don’t go to the movies, DO go to the library, DO shop and cook wisely, DO learn to mend your clothes, DON’T Dry Clean - if it can’t be hand washed, you don’t need it —

My best advice, decide who is going to be in charge of the family finances and stick to it - sit down and do the bills together, but, one person is in charge of the bills…

It really CAN be done.
 
Go to the public library and you will find a whole shelf full of books on personal finance/spending/budgeting/saving/planning. You NEED it!
 
Thanks for your advice. Unfortuanatley, being a student and in the program that I am in, a computer is a neccesity. Ontario colleges aren’t very-well funded (they have problems with budgetting too!!) actually, they rate the worst in all of Canada (yay). It is impossible to find a working computer that isn’t occupied by some guy playing Doom. Unfortunatley, there are no rules that say that someone playing games should forfeit their computer for another who has to work. We’ve been working on changing this, but nothing has happened so far. This is of course, if the computers are working at all.

We are currently trying to find a smaller, more affordable place to live because our landlord is raising our rent. DH commutes to work so he needs a car, but I don’t.

Keep that advice coming, your posting is not in vain, trust me, I’m jotting all of this down in my notebook!!

Thanks
Sarc
 
Buy in bulk when food shopping, everything is cheaper at Smart and Final. Clothes are cheap at thrift store, and I just got 2 $40 shirts a few months ago in brand new condition for $1.50 each at a thrift store. Don’t buy anything brand name. Sport shoes: Big5 if you must, they have great sales. Turn off all the lights in your house when you aren’t using them (be religious, we lowered our electric bill by about half just by turning out lights we weren’t using). Learn to do stuff you would normally hire others to do: plumbing is not difficult, minor electrical is not difficult, minor car repairs are not difficult (these things are just a bit messy, but you will get the hang of it and save lots of $$$ when problems come up).

Then, get rid of any extras (56K instead of DSL, or bargain with a neighbor to split a connection, for example). Turn off the heater and bundle up (though that might be unreasonable depending on where you live). Don’t ever eat out, don’t use the dishwasher. Basically, if you don’t need it to live, then do without it for a while, until you have a chance to earn enough money to change your situation.

Those are my suggestions. Good luck, I’ll pray for your success.

Eamon
 
In 2003 my daughter bought a 2-year-old laptop computer on E-bay for $300.
 
Regarding a new computer:

I do a lot of computer work both for my job and on the side, and am A+ Certified (hardware/software). I can tell you from experience that unless it was hit by lightning, it is likely that 90% or your computer still works no matter what’s wrong with it. Unless you need more computing power, having it repaired is going to be far cheaper than buying a new one. If you want to PM me or email me (gardocki [at] yahoo.com) I can try and help you troubleshoot the problem so you know what to tell a repair shop.
 
Web site with some good tips:

members.aol.com/moneymstr/cheap.htm

I second the idea of repairing your computer. My DH is know to be the salvage yard of computers, everyone gives us old things that “don’t work” - he gets them working again every time. If you cannot repair, you can buy a good used computer for a couple hundred bucks.

Libraries are also good places to use computers…
 
Sarcophagus:

I can’t tell from your post whether you actually have an itemized budget and are overspending on various items each month or whether you’re simply coming up short every month, and have no idea why.

It’s not the same thing. You can’t save money unless you know where you’re spending it, and that is why you need a budget: to itemize expenses. You can then evaluate your expenses and decide whether some can be eliminated.

When my husband and I got married, we did not initially budget anything; we had generous savings and good jobs. When we realized we wanted to go to graduate school, we decided together that a strict budget was in order so we could save money. By tracking our spending, we were astonished to find how much money was going daily to fast food, coffee and snack expenses. By eliminating these expenses completely (make coffee at home, learn to cook, buy groceries and make a weekly menu) we found we could start saving money again.

So…do you actually have an itemized budget? A lot of your frivolous expenses can be identified that way. If you simply insist on continuing to buy those unnecessary items, however, that is due not to some magic “inability to keep a budget” but to immaturity.
 
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sarcophagus:
I read in other threads that family’s with 4 children etc. can live off of $20,000 /year or less. How is this possible?
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It’s not
 
It’s quite depressing to come to terms with the fact that you can’t afford all the things you want…until you go without and learn that you don’t need them.

Some people are very good at living off of nothing. I believe they are the exception. The key is to look at every little thing you spend money one. This is what the thriftiest families do. Reuse baggies and foil. Cut dryer sheets in thirds or air dry. Take shorter showers to save on hot water. Have a meatless meal once a week. Never or rarely eat out. Make sure errands are done together so as to save on gas. Check ebay before buying ANYTHING new. Never buy books or magazines or CDs if you have a good library (with a few Catholic reference books of course). Never waste leftovers. Don’t buy fancy cleaners- bleach or comet with a sponge works fine. Buy clothes at thrift stores, garage sales and ebay. Don’t run the dishwasher unless it’s full. Make things from scratch. Compare prices!!! Especially at different stores. One of these things done alone will not make an impact; it’s everything together that helps.

It’s all these little things and many more, along with the big things that make a difference. Do you need new $80 shoes for an event or can you borrow a pair? Do you need a cell phone, DSL or cable tv? Do you need a new car, or will an old one do? (NEVER lease). I don’t know what the tax system is like in Canada, but are there benefits to buying a small house versus renting, such as tax breaks? Does Canada offer loans where you don’t have to put any money down?

Does your college offer student employment to make some extra cash? Also, check your closets and storage. Got anything to sell? Have a garage sale or put it on ebay.
 
Thanks everyone.

Dr. Colossus, Kage-er:

My computer is basically in pieces (my roommate stole most of them…still trying to get it back). My monitor, well, I melted it in a freak-candle accident…it simply does not work. A new computer (or at least monitor and more pieces) is pretty much my only option.

Maendem:

I think setting up the budget is the hardest part. I try to pare everything down to what we need not want but then my husband says it’s too strict. Once we’ve come up with something that satisfies both of us, we always either a) over spend or b) forget about the budget (mostly DH 😉 ). We usually don’t have a record of what we’ve purchased because DH doesn’t keep reciepts or he’ll give me one or two when he remembers. I’ve tried everything, most recently, keeping a reciept box by the door, empty pockets into box, but that’s not working either. It could be due to immaturity, since niether of us has had to do this before, but I would rather call it inexperience.

MooCowSteph:

I didn’t think it was possible…
 
Sarc,

Look up trustingly into your husband’s eyes. Tell him you haven’t succeeded with keeping to a budget, and you need him to assume his God-given leadership in this and to set the example you need 😉 ; ask him to craft the spending plan . . . a sense of control might help him succeed.
 
Never live beyond your means.

Even when you can swim in your dough pretend you are a pauper.
 
From what I understand - here in the US - student loans are deferred from payment while one is still a full time student. You must begin paying it back while still in school :eek:
 
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sarcophagus:
I read in other threads that family’s with 4 children etc. can live off of $20,000 /year or less. How is this possible?
Click to expand...
There are very, very few who really manage this. The ranks of those who are running up huge debts just to get by are legion.

Many don’t have student loans because they didn’t make it to college. Generally speaking, they do not have two cars, their own computers or cell phones or make long-distance phone calls, let alone pay for cable tv. They are under-insured or not insured at all. They do not buy anything that is even remotely optional. They usually do not have two parents working, at least not simultaneously, because someone has the job of staying home with the kids, making things from scratch, mending clothes, planning how to stretch their money, and bargain hunting, which is about a full-time job and a half. And if anyone gets sick or something breaks, they are up the creek without a paddle.

They put* every* expenditure on the table. They waste nothing and go without often. Sometimes, they go hungry so the kids can eat. They have to swallow their pride and take emergency food boxes and any other outside assistance they can get their hands on. It is a hard life.

As for you, I have some suggestions:
  1. Do not go out of the house with money or a credit card in your pocket until you get more self-discipline (put your one remaining credit card in a bowl of water and freeze it, if you have to).
  2. If you don’t know how to cook, and economically, learn. (Your local food bank is likely to have classes.) Likewise, learn how to do every other service job: changing oil, washing the car, everything. A dollar saved is better than a dollar earned, because you don’t have to pay social security or any other taxes on it.
  3. Go into Lent mode: get rid of all paid entertainment (including cable tv) and paid services (such as prepared food) and spend nothing on yourself that is not a need.
  4. Get thee to the library and start studying up on how people do this… which will include *never *buying anything that requires dry-cleaning, I promise you.
  5. Promise your husband and let him promise you to hold each other’s feet to the fire when it comes to money. Full disclosure will help keep you from cheating.
 
I have a student bank loan. This is because the government student loans denied me because my parents make too much money (before I was married). I can try again next year, which works the same, pay after your done. For now, I pay monthly interest charges, but they are so high that I have to pay my loan off or I’ll never be out of debt.

I never thought of my husband doing the budget, to be honest. I don’t know if he will like it but I will try. He always says “WE’LL” sit down and do a budget, but it always ends up being me because I do all the banking.

What are some good sources of entertainment that don’t cost a lot? That is my husbands biggest complaint, that I don’t allocate enough for entertainment…
 
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sarcophagus:
What are some good sources of entertainment that don’t cost a lot? That is my husbands biggest complaint, that I don’t allocate enough for entertainment…
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TALKING 🙂 Really, visit with friends - everyone bring some food and cook a meal together, play board games or other old fashioned parlor games. Our family is working on a jigsaw puzzle - it cost $2 and has provided hours of together time. Museums, libraries, CHURCH, walking in the park, plays or concerts put on by your college. Our library (in a backwoods Arkansas town) has Video Tapes, DVDs, CDs as well as books and magazines and books-on-tape…

Not sure where you are in Canada, but a quick google brought me to:

tourismvancouver.com/media/story_ideas/free.cfm
 
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sarcophagus:
What are some good sources of entertainment that don’t cost a lot? That is my husbands biggest complaint, that I don’t allocate enough for entertainment…
Click to expand...
What kinds of entertainment? Some ideas off the top of my head:

-Check to see if there are any “dollar show” movie theaters near you.
-Colleges often have drama departments that put on quality performances for cheap.
-If you have a student ID many places will give discounts.
 
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