Can a 9 year old altar server be refused holy communion

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phil19034 said:
At that moment in time, the priest didn’t know whether the child was cupliable for his grave sin or not.
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The OP already clarified that there was confusion. There’s nothing to indicate Mortal Sin here. I endured several years of Altar Serving and can attest that everyone including the Priest were regularly confused about scheduling and procedures.

The Adults should be communicating in this situation.
 
I’m sorry, but canon 915 doesn’t say anything of the sort.

Also, canon 914 says that children can be denied communion if the priest doesn’t think they are sufficiently disposed
PARTICIPATION IN THE MOST HOLY EUCHARIST

Can. 912 Any baptized person not prohibited by law can and must be admitted to holy communion.

Can. 913 §1. The administration of the Most Holy Eucharist to children requires that they have sufficient knowledge and careful preparation so that they understand the mystery of Christ according to their capacity and are able to receive the body of Christ with faith and devotion.

§2. The Most Holy Eucharist, however, can be administered to children in danger of death if they can distinguish the body of Christ from ordinary food and receive communion reverently.

Can. 914 It is primarily the duty of parents and those who take the place of parents, as well as the duty of pastors, to take care that children who have reached the use of reason are prepared properly and, after they have made sacramental confession, are refreshed with this divine food as soon as possible. It is for the pastor to exercise vigilance so that children who have not attained the use of reason or whom he judges are not sufficiently disposed do not approach holy communion.

Can. 915 Those who have been excommunicated or interdicted after the imposition or declaration of the penalty and others obstinately persevering in manifest grave sin are not to be admitted to holy communion.

Can. 916 A person who is conscious of grave sin is not to celebrate Mass or receive the body of the Lord without previous sacramental confession unless there is a grave reason and there is no opportunity to confess; in this case the person is to remember the obligation to make an act of perfect contrition which includes the resolution of confessing as soon as possible.

Can. 917 A person who has already received the Most Holy Eucharist can receive it a second time on the same day only within the eucharistic celebration in which the person participates, without prejudice to the prescript of can. 921, §2.

Can. 918 It is highly recommended that the faithful receive holy communion during the eucharistic celebration itself. It is to be administered outside the Mass, however, to those who request it for a just cause, with the liturgical rites being observed.

Can. 919 §1. A person who is to receive the Most Holy Eucharist is to abstain for at least one hour before holy communion from any food and drink, except for only water and medicine.

§2. A priest who celebrates the Most Holy Eucharist two or three times on the same day can take something before the second or third celebration even if there is less than one hour between them.
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I think that a pastor can infer from direct defiance that whether out of ignorance or out of disobedience that according to his best judgment the child is very likely not properly disposed. Properly forming the consciences of children under his care is his duty.
 
I am wondering why the child insisted on serving Saturday Vigil and Sunday after the childs father had told the Pastoral Associate and Pastor that the childs father wanted to take the child to a different Parish and sit with the family rather then serve.

Had the childs father , the husband , actually told the wife and child this? If so, why is the child disobeying . If not, why hasnt the husband and father had this discussion with wife and child
 
Jacque said:
This week my son insisted so I took him to mass on Saturday vigil and Sunday. The pastor told my son not to serve but I was in the pews otherwise I would have stopped my son.
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Why was your son not next to you in the pews if you knew he wasn’t supposed to serve? If he went up before mass, why didn’t you follow to retrieve him? You’re not forbidden.
 
The pastor may have reasonably assumed the parents were discussing this issue and were on the same page. The biggest issue here is the parents not communicating.
 
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What difference does it make if I were to accept the premise that the priest was wrong?

He, and he alone, decides who may or may not be an altar server. That is unquestionably a privilege, not a right. He has the prudent standard that he does not allow servers to serve without the consent of both parents. That is his prerogative. Not only that, by my experience I would say his policy is entirely reasonable and prudent.

The question is what the mother ought to do, going forward. What she should not do is to teach her son that if he doesn’t like the boundaries his dad or his pastor puts on him, she’s going to go to bat for him. No. For the good of her son’s relationship with his dad and his pastor and, honestly, for the good of her marriage, she needs to teach her son to respect the authority of his father and his pastor and to put the best possible interpretation on the boundaries they put on him. She needs to teach him to see things from their standpoint and to look for solutions that will meet their concerns. She needs to teach him to apologize when he even unintentionally defies their authority. To do otherwise is a disservice to the child.

Besides, if she defends her husband’s authority over their children, it is the policy that will lead her husband to defend the boundaries that she puts on their children. I will guarantee that a mother who has the policy that her husband does not have authority over the children will find herself with a husband who has the policy that she has no ultimate authority over the children, either. Well, then, who does? The children will figure out that they can play one parent against the other, and that is a recipe for miserable children in a miserable and chaotic family.

(Likewise, a child taught to defy the legitimate authority of his pastor is a child being taught to defy the legitimate authority of the Church.)
 
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Oh, please. Ruin his good name? Why? Because people are going to jump to the conclusion that a nine-year-old…did what? If anyone noticed at all–which is highly unlikely unless the 9 year old made a little scene of some kind, which I doubt–they’re going to assume that Father understood something that the 9 year old didn’t. Period. Most people will assume that the child elected not to receive Holy Communion, which altar servers do from time to time without 99% of the congregation even noticing.

Well, yes, you dared to say it.
I don’t think saying that the child unintentionally did something wrong is “blaming the child.” I also don’t think there is anything whatsoever to be gained in the child’s favor by making a federal case out of this incident. It is time to step back and get all the adults on the same page, not to take sides against the decisions of the child’s pastor and father.
 
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You are suggesting making a legal case out of this? To what end? Are you a canon lawyer looking for clients?

I don’t think you actually are leaving the pastoral decisions to the priest, or interpretation of how to apply canon law in the discharge of his pastoral duties, either.

Having said that, I think the OP gets the gist of the various ways of thinking about her situation, which is all she asked for.
 
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Thank you so much for your kind words. Even Christ himself stood up for children in front of his disciples. Our goal as adults must be to give children as much positive experiences about church as possible so as to increase their chances of going to church when they are grown up especially be drawn to its Eucharistic presence and solace when they hit rough patch. Sadly, if you see vast majority of the response in this post are having adultlike expectations from a 9 year old but hardly any from the father (the spiritual head of the family) and the pastor. The children are the future of the church Christ was wise not to turn them away, unfortunately we are not. No wonder church attendance is in a decline because of lack of joy and almost no rights for the most vulnerable that is children even in these modern times. You can ask any child who is most important to them they will mostly respond some adult and not God because they conditioned to do so. If they choose God they will suffer much just as Christ predicted. Adults mostly (not all, there still a few left as you can see in this post) who will not cut some slack for the child.
Based on your kind words I am sure you already know. Thanks again and God bless you.
 
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To @PetraG,

I concur with @(name removed by moderator). If you actually look to what the law says in terms of how one goes about denying communion, it’s an incredibly strict matter, and there doesn’t seem to be anything in the OP’s account here that warrants doing so. I’m not even sure how a 9 year old would do something that rises to the level of legally having communion denied.

One of the basic principles of interpreting Canon Law is the principle of charity, namely that favors are to be multiplied and burdens restricted. In other words, if the law grants a favor, we interpret the law as broadly as possible. If it imposes a burden, e.g. a penalty of some kind, it must be interpreted as strictly as possible. For example, people all the time talk about how any number of people connected to abortion are automatically excommunicated, even those who support it by voting for it or speaking out in favor of it on social media. While these things are gravely wrong, they do not carry the automatic penalty that is incurred for “procuring a completed abortion,” as the law puts it. There are basically three people who can be said to do that, namely the doctor who performs it, the mother who seeks it, and whomever pays for it. This penalty is only incurred by them and only if they were aware that the penalty existed in the first place.

Not to get off topic, of course, but just an example. Denying communion is a penalty. It can only be carried out if very strict criteria are met. I don’t see that that’s the case here, and I’m sure you’d be hard pressed to find the circumstances under which a child of that age could be rightfully denied communion.

-Fr ACEGC
 
Thank you for your kind words. I left my son 20 minutes before the mass at the sacristy following regular schedule. I only wish the pastor could have punished me because the child didn’t drive to church himself or called me before the mass to take my son away from serving instead he was not allowed to receive communion. I was sitting right there in plain sight or asked my son to get me. Even Christ stood up for rights of children in front of disciples often risking loss of followers. Most posters in this thread seem to have adultlike expectations from a child and almost none from the father (spiritual head) and pastor. As adults we must do our best to give children only happy memories about church. This way they’re most likely to continue attending church when they grow up, especially when they hit a rough patch they will find solace in the Eucharistic presence at church. You can test me on this, most children will respond some adult and not God as the most important person in their lives because they are conditioned to do so. Christ was wise not to turn the children away as they are the future of the church. Even the apostles risked their own image of refusing children and mentioning on how Christ handled this situation in 3 out of 4 gospels. No wonder church attendance is down as there is almost no body around to stand up for children. The commandments were made for us and not the other way round.
I’m sure you know all the above and more I can tell based on the kindness of all your posts. Thanks again and God bless you.
 
And before someone conflates the two, I should point out that “unable to receive communion due to not being in the state of grace” is not the same as “excommunicated.” Many who are excommunicated are in a state of mortal sin, but not all who are in mortal sin are excommunicated. I would imagine that only a very minute number of those outside the state of grace are excommunicated at any given point.
 
Not really. It’s basically impossible to know if someone is in mortal sin, unless it’s a public and manifest state of grave sin. But in just the normal course of things, there isn’t any way to be sure on the part of the priest.
 
I can sympathize. When my son was around 10 he used to walk round the house at times saying the rosary. This bothered my husband and he asked me to not let him do that.

I was not happy but accepted that. Your child is an only child which may be a factor. I hope as he gets older he will allowed him to be an alter server.
 
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I don’t think petty disobedience is grave matter in the first place, at least on it’s own.
 
Thank you for your prayers. My husband says he is asserting his fatherly right by requiring his son sit next to him at Mass. I have had several discussions between my husband for past 2 weeks as to not to force his son to sit next to him at mass if his choice is to serve when there is no one else to serve or when he is on schedule as per the rules of this church. Using force and complaints to church can help him extract honor from his son but not his love. This could have long lasting effect on their relationship. As parents we must not leverage the 5th commandment for personal gain. I begged my husband to let our son have happy memories at church especially easy to do when they are this young so it very likely he will continue to serve God when he grows up or at least we have not interfered between him and God. My husband has reached out to the pastoral associate yesterday, but I’m guessing it is too late to repair the damage he has done. I’m praying for him and my son. Thanks again.
 
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