Can a man and a woman "just be friends?"

[Margy1948]

Definitely!

 

[Litcrit]

When you have a good, close friend you tend to confide in them - tell them your secrets, ask for advice, etc.
You put yourself into an emotionally vulnerable state, and that’s not a bad thing! That’s what friends are for, and why we need them!

But let’s say I’m having relationship issues with my husband - I want a “male perspective” so I confide in my close, single, male friend.
He obviously likes me and enjoys my company or he wouldn’t be my friend, we start talking and sharing personal issues; then suddenly I’m getting emotional male validation and attention from a man that isn’t my husband.
Most people take flirting as a compliment - I mean, it’s nice to feel like you’re desirable, and if you put yourself into a situation where you’re close emotionally, and are together privately and confiding in someone who obviously enjoys your company, is single and of the opposite sex - I can easily see it being a trap too easy to fall into.

I do confide in my close male friends about my own issues (family of origin, psychological and personal development, work stuff, dear personal interests) - but if I were ever to have a fight or any misunderstanding with my husband, I’m not sure I’d be sharing that with either male or female friends! Thank God, we’ve never in our marriage had any real misunderstanding or disagreement, but even if it were to happen, I’d like to resolve it with my husband, and not discuss it with friends of either sex.

I don’t really like it when my female friends complain about their husbands - *because *I’m a friend to their marriages. I’m not sure how much anyone’s sex has to do with anything, at least where I’m concerned.

Well, maybe it does. With male friends, I can sometimes explain why their wives are right and they’re wrong

And, interestingly enough, I’ve never in my life liked flirting - it has always made me very uncomfortable, even when I was single. I have a very matter-of-fact communication style. When I was single, there were only two ways in which a male could talk to me. Want to be my friend? Talk to me like you would to any other friend, male or female. Want to be my boyfriend? Be open about it, don’t *flirt *, and we can discuss it (I know, I’m not much fun).

Because you value his friendship and it is not a source of temptation.

The fact that some people are alcoholics does not mean that I need to abstain completely from alcohol.

You are, of course, able to do whatever you want in this regard for the sake of your marriage.

Yes, this.

 

[Poetpeace]

See, I’ve grown up with guys for friends since the day I was born. I am one of 6 siblings, 4 of which are brothers, so I’ve always had more male friends than female friends.

This has never been an issue until now in my life, when I am 20 years old, in University, and have had at least 7 of my male friends admit they quite like me. I am in a committed relationship so naturally have never liked them back, however it does make the friendship I have with them very awkward. It was never like this when I was a child.

On another note, I do have a handful of other guy friends whom are already in relationships and so have never done such a thing, and I am still very close friends with them.