Dulcissima,
Sorry to have so many posts in a row. Not trying to dominate the conversation now, but so much to respond to after I got home from work.
“In order for a petition to be submitted to a Tribunal in the US, there must be a divorce decree.”
While I agree with you that this is what U.S. tribunals require, nowhere in Canon Law will you find such a requirement. If anything, I believe this requirement actually encourages divorce. If, as in other parts of the world, one first determined the validity of their marriage through nullity proceedings before civilly divorcing, there might be much fewer divorces. After all, speaking of statistics, while the U.S. has only 6% of the world’s Catholics, nearly 80% of the world’s annulments are granted here. That should be problematic, and it is! Forty years ago, there were approximately 600 annulments granted in the U.S. per year. Today it is over 60,000. That’s a 10,000% increase! That should also be troubling to U.S. Catholics.
“Of the ones that submit the preliminary paperwork to Petition, some are rejected for not having sufficient grounds.”
Some, but very, very few petitions are turned away. I believe I have read that approximately 90-92% of petitions received are accepted. Once accepted, I’ve read as low as 90% (if you want to call that “low”) and as high as 97% of all petitions accepted, end up with a decree of nullity. I came across this statistic:
“From 1984 to 1994 it was 97% for First Instance trials. All cases however have to have a second trial. The percentage of decisions overturned in the United States is 4/10 of 1%”
Only 4/10 of 1% of first instance affirmative decsions are reversed in the U.S. by second instance courts! And this doesn’t indicate a high likelihood of the court of second instance acting as a rubber stamp of the first instance court’s affirmative decision, how?
“Your cynicism about the Tribunal process really could be causing you to not search for the truth when it comes to your marriage. It would really be good for you to put aside all of what you think you know with absolute certainty and revisit where you both were when you married, what your family backgrounds were like, and how you lived your faith after you exchanged your vows. If there were sacramental graces that were protecting your marriage, what was the series of events that led to your divorce? I hope that you can find some peace in actually searching for that answer, rather than just assuming you already know it all with certainty.”
I appreciate your sentiments in light of the cesspool our society has become, yet I know with moral certitude that my marriage is valid. We both were devout Catholics coming into the marriage. Our faith was integral to our daily living. We never contracepted. We were open to children. We homeschooled our children out of concern that they be taught the Catholic virtues, which is not even guaranteed in many Catholic schools. Sometimes divorce happens because one or both choose to exercise free will in a sinful way. You know, Pope John Paul II, in an address to the Roman Rota, stated that through a couple’s own actions, a valid marriage can be destroyed.
And along those same lines, yet also expanding on the thought, he stated in Familiaris Consortio #83:
83 Various reasons can unfortunately lead to the often irreparable breakdown of valid marriages. These include mutual lack of understanding and the inability to enter into interpersonal relationships. Obviously, separation must be considered as a last resort, (my comment: notice, separation, not divorce) after all other reasonable attempts at reconciliation have proved vain.
Loneliness and other difficulties are often the lot of separated spouses, especially when they are the innocent parties. The ecclesial community must support such people more than ever. It must give them much respect, solidarity, understanding and practical help, so that they can preserve their fidelity even in their difficult situation; (my comment: not so they can walk away from their vows) and it must help them to cultivate the need to forgive which is inherent in Christian love, and to be ready perhaps to return to their former married life. (My comment: Where is this message of reconciliation from our priests and bishops?)
The situation is similar for people who have undergone divorce, but, being well aware that the valid marriage bond is indissoluble, refrain from becoming involved in a new union and devote themselves solely to carrying out their family duties and the responsibilities of Christian life. In such cases their example of fidelity and Christian consistency takes on particular value as a witness before the world and the Church. (YES!) Here it is even more necessary for the Church to offer continual love and assistance, without there being any obstacle to admission to the sacraments.
Both Popes John Paul II and Benedict XVI have addressed the Roman Rota with their concerns about the number of marriages being declared null, and cautioning that VALID marriages can fail. Yet, failure of a marriage is not to be equated with invalidity of the marriage.
