Catholic Church Lacks Genuine Help For Rape Victims From Catholic Prospective
- Status
L
Lainey63
Guest
Ana I belong to a couple of the social groups here and couldn’t one be started in the social groups.
A
Ana
Guest
That’s a good idea, Lainey. Are the social groups moderated like these are?
C
centurionguard
Guest
CATECHISM OF THE CATHOLIC CHURCH
In this entire post I have not seen ONE priest or religious who has dared or cared to offer ANY support whatsoever to the aid of any rape victim on the C.A.F. site.
WHY ?
Why is it that in the entire Catholic Church this above quote is practically the only clause in the Church that speaks of anything BUT that supports anything that remotely supports all victims of rape ?
In this entire post I have not seen ONE priest or religious who has dared or cared to offer ANY support whatsoever to the aid of any rape victim on the C.A.F. site.
WHY ?
L
Lainey63
Guest
I wouldn’t be so offended…I noticed that there’s been only a few of us here. I noticed a lot of people aren’t touching this thread with a ten foot pole. This is a hard subject. I particularly like this thread, we have our own little support group going on here. I’ve found it to be very supportive and comforting. And its exactly the right time for me. My homework for counseling in reading a book called “Beauty Restored” it’s written by a woman who was date raped. Her agony and her healing which is totally centered around Jesus. I’m also supposed to be journaling. I read the first chapter & part of the second chapter today. So far I would recommend reading it. She talks about Jesus coming to her in her shame and being with her, crying with her, crying for her…which reminded of one show that I watched on EWTN. Mother Angelica was talking about Job and how his friends came to him and just sat with him & cried with him. Which is what God does with us.
C
centurionguard
Guest
Hello Lainey;
You are correct. Perhaps my last post was born out of frustration. I should have remained in a more humble and prayerful disposition. It’s just that there seems to be so much negativity when the subject of rape is brought up in different circles within the Catholic Church. I will make an honest search for the book “Beauty Restored”. Thank you.
A
Ana
Guest
I think people shy away from intense suffering, it makes them uncomfortable. Look how the apostles ran from Jesus.
Beauty Restored sounds wonderful … even just the title.
N
nancy_dalrymple
Guest
Hello, I have been watching this forum and it is a sad subject, hard to explain and it does make your blood crawl and get on your nerves expecially when it has happened to you.It has an effect on you just talking about it because you are reliving old memories, bad one’s. I know the priests will talk to you about it and listen to you but there is not much they realy can do. They understand but are not Doctors and cannot give you to much advise on the subject. I wonder if the people of the church could get a group (with permission ) to help others who are going through this terrible ordeal? It’s not a bad idea and it could help out in your community to have such a place in a church setting. But i dont know the rules and it was just a suggestion.May be a recovery group. Love of Christ Nancy
L
Lainey63
Guest
Nancy there is a new group called Grief to Grace, I have a link either on the 1st or 2nd page of this forum. God Bless.
N
nancy_dalrymple
Guest
Lainey63, Hi i read a post here that mentioned starting a group in a church to as i did, but i think if that happened it should not just be for Catholic’s but for any victim who has been raped. I even think it would be good for the church, as it would let others see the charity of the catholic church. You never forget the ones who stretch out a hand in time of trouble and need. Think of how many people you could help with the knowledge just from this group. Bad thing’s happen but if we can take those bad things and use them to fight evil so others will know there are
people out there who have suffered just like them, it would be a healing for you and for those whose lifes you touch. Think of it: the ball is in you court, Stay in the slump and feel bad or use that bad for good! You are Loved I would like to help also. AMOS 5 13 but all that chapter is good.Nancy
people out there who have suffered just like them, it would be a healing for you and for those whose lifes you touch. Think of it: the ball is in you court, Stay in the slump and feel bad or use that bad for good! You are Loved I would like to help also. AMOS 5 13 but all that chapter is good.Nancy
C
centurionguard
Guest
Hello Nancy;
I am pleased that you have taken the time to add a sincere voice of compassion to this post. Rape, Sexual Assault, Incest, and Spousal Abuse is a difficult topic to speak about not just from those broken, and shattered inside, but even with those close to family, friends, colleagues, or anybody with a true sincere heart who can honestly try to put their own heart in a deep empathetic sense to fathom what it would be like for they themselves to (“feel”)inside their heart what it would be like to suffer bodily, mentally, and spiritually with such a cross. True some people have the gift to empathize more than others. I feel it necessary to reiterate the title of this post which reads as follows (“Catholic Church Lacks Genuine Help For Rape Victims From Catholic Prospective”) My imperative direction in this post was to bring a real essential awareness that there are (“literally millions”) of Catholics who live with an affliction related to rape, incest, or spousal abuse. Collectively over 330,000 people in United States and Canada are sexually assaulted by rape, incest, or spousal abuse every year. That’s one victim every two minutes. In Africa there’s one victim every seven seconds. Would it be too much to say that RAPE, INCEST, and SPOUSAL ABUSE on this confounded planet is virtually pandemic? I certainly believe it to be just that.
From secular standpoint psychotherapy as a medical science is still in its infancy and often proves to be a weak bandage fix to many people’s psychological problems. Never does this mundane science address the spiritual welfare of an individual. Some here in this post keep saying that the clergy can do very little to help rape, incest, and spousal abuse victims. I respectfully and strongly disagree. Is it enough that the Church offers “only” Mass prayer intentions for this cause? Seems too familiar like a wash my hands quick fix-it solution to me. Rape has often been called (“Soul Death”). This crime ties an extremely close first with the capital sin “Murder”. Priests are called Shepherds of Christ; they are also spiritual directors not just from the pulpit. There ministry calls them to bring comfort and hope to the sick and suffering. Physical suffering is easy to identify. Those suffering mental illness and (“Soul Death”) from Rape and Incest is the least visible and the most often neglected and spurned by the Catholic clergy. It would seem clear that Social Justice in the Church and her mission to aid her own mentally afflicted is often least considered. And that I believe is a great Shame in the Catholic Church in its lacking role to reach out more effectively to (“all”) in the Church who are mentally sick and afflicted. It has never been the Catholic Churches mission to idolize secular sciences in psychiatry, psychotherapy, duly supported by their wizardry concoction of psychotropic chemical drugs exploited and mass produced by a multi-billion dollar Drug Industry as a cure-all means to the mentally afflicted. If it were not for multi-national Pharmaceutical companies psychiatry today would be virtually a dead medical science considering the history of all the lobotomies this medical science did to the mentally afflicted in the past.
I am pleased that you have taken the time to add a sincere voice of compassion to this post. Rape, Sexual Assault, Incest, and Spousal Abuse is a difficult topic to speak about not just from those broken, and shattered inside, but even with those close to family, friends, colleagues, or anybody with a true sincere heart who can honestly try to put their own heart in a deep empathetic sense to fathom what it would be like for they themselves to (“feel”)inside their heart what it would be like to suffer bodily, mentally, and spiritually with such a cross. True some people have the gift to empathize more than others. I feel it necessary to reiterate the title of this post which reads as follows (“Catholic Church Lacks Genuine Help For Rape Victims From Catholic Prospective”) My imperative direction in this post was to bring a real essential awareness that there are (“literally millions”) of Catholics who live with an affliction related to rape, incest, or spousal abuse. Collectively over 330,000 people in United States and Canada are sexually assaulted by rape, incest, or spousal abuse every year. That’s one victim every two minutes. In Africa there’s one victim every seven seconds. Would it be too much to say that RAPE, INCEST, and SPOUSAL ABUSE on this confounded planet is virtually pandemic? I certainly believe it to be just that.
. The most likely person who (“might”) possible consider even talking to a priest about their rape stigma is evidently women. Men on the other hand would be far fewer if any at all; and would be least likely to confront their past stigma because of mainstream societal bias dichotomizing most male rape victims as gay.
From secular standpoint psychotherapy as a medical science is still in its infancy and often proves to be a weak bandage fix to many people’s psychological problems. Never does this mundane science address the spiritual welfare of an individual. Some here in this post keep saying that the clergy can do very little to help rape, incest, and spousal abuse victims. I respectfully and strongly disagree. Is it enough that the Church offers “only” Mass prayer intentions for this cause? Seems too familiar like a wash my hands quick fix-it solution to me. Rape has often been called (“Soul Death”). This crime ties an extremely close first with the capital sin “Murder”. Priests are called Shepherds of Christ; they are also spiritual directors not just from the pulpit. There ministry calls them to bring comfort and hope to the sick and suffering. Physical suffering is easy to identify. Those suffering mental illness and (“Soul Death”) from Rape and Incest is the least visible and the most often neglected and spurned by the Catholic clergy. It would seem clear that Social Justice in the Church and her mission to aid her own mentally afflicted is often least considered. And that I believe is a great Shame in the Catholic Church in its lacking role to reach out more effectively to (“all”) in the Church who are mentally sick and afflicted. It has never been the Catholic Churches mission to idolize secular sciences in psychiatry, psychotherapy, duly supported by their wizardry concoction of psychotropic chemical drugs exploited and mass produced by a multi-billion dollar Drug Industry as a cure-all means to the mentally afflicted. If it were not for multi-national Pharmaceutical companies psychiatry today would be virtually a dead medical science considering the history of all the lobotomies this medical science did to the mentally afflicted in the past.
A
Ana
Guest
I 100 percent agree with your respectful disagreement.
Nancy, it is difficult for us survivors to read of others experiences. It can open up old wounds in us and flare up some of our old and unhealthy coping mechanisms. One good thing about internet, is that you can always get up and take a breather if you need to. I had to after reading Chris’s experiences. It is impossible for me to read of those types of experiences without empathizing deeply … I think that even though it hurts us, that at some point with healing, will come the ability to hurt without it hurting, if you know what I mean. To be able to feel the suffering that comes from compassion, without the negative impact on our own psyche, but instead an ability to allow our compassion to become an avenue of healing and grace for the recipient … who so often is in desperate need of validation and encouragement. Sometimes we are the ones to give, sometimes we are the ones to receive this support. When we need it, we ask … and when we have it, we give. Sometimes I feel stronger than others, and sometimes I feel very fragile and vulnerable. Sometimes I can feel strong and then read something and all of a sudden I am in a spin, and I don’t know who I am … just that I am scared, and I hurt and I feel alone and desperate. But I am learning that though my feelings are valid and something to be cherished, they are not an accurate guide always for the decisions I need to make. I treat my feelings like my children. I listen deeply and give them my wholehearted consideration, but the final say belongs to me (hopefully.)
C
centurionguard
Guest
Hi Ana;
I think that sometimes we all need to step back for a moment and really take a keen and honest look at (“ALL”) people who suffer physically or mentally for whatever the reason or cause of their affliction. I have spent literally decades in life trying to fathom suffering in itself. In late November 25, 1996, my beloved father who had just retired a year prior from two full careers as a medical examiner in the Canadian Military and Canadian National Railways. He began working in the early fall of 1996 on a parish church project as an assistant to helping a Pipe Organ Builder refurbish and completely overhaul a 70 year old pipe organ. On Monday November 25, 1996 he had a tragic accident in our parish Catholic Church that would ultimately change his life until his death five days before Christmas 2007. He fell 35 feet off a rickety latter in the church bell tower severing his spinal cord between the third and forth vertebrae. After spending 14 months in a hospital Neuro- Intensive-Care-Unit our family brought him home in a make-shift Mini hospital in our split-level home with 24/7 nursing care. My father was a quadriplegic completely paralyzed from the neck down and reliant on full ventilated life support with the deep love of his family and the gentle kind-hearted love of his nurses. My father was also a deep spiritual man who loved his Catholic Church and had a profound love for Saint John of the Cross, St Theresa of Avila and Mother Teresa of Calcutta. My family and I have often asked ourselves why do such horrible fates befall good people in life. If you look for a human reason you will never find it. I strongly believe that what happened to my father was for the betterment of his own soul and the individual souls of his beloved family. I have done a lot of soul searching about this. Maybe my own gang-rape at gunpoint is for the betterment of my own soul. Maybe I’m wrong. But I cannot see any other possible answer to why many of us human souls are led down the path of suffering.
LIFE’S WEAVING
My life is but a weaving
Between my God and me;
I may not choose the colors,
Only God knows what they should be;
For He can view the pattern
Upon the upper side
While I can see it only
On this, the under side.
Sometimes He weaveth sorrow
Which seemeth strange to me;
But I will trust His judgement,
And work on faithfully;
Tis He who fills the shuttle,
So I shall weave in earnest
And leave with Him the rest.
At last, when life has ended,
With Him I shall abide,
Then I may view the pattern
Upon the Upper side;
Then I shall know the reason
Why pain and joy entwined,
Was woven in the fabric
Of Life that God designed.
P.S. I only hope God can forgive me when pain inside my heart blinds me.
C
centurionguard
Guest
THE ORIGINS OF FEAR IN SOCIETY
Part One
What is the origin of terrible fears that so hinder us in making our heart’s desire; a better world to live in ? I believe that the origins of fear, of dissidence, and of the different, and of loss, as well as the fear of the ugly and the dirty; are to be found in the fears that many of us experience in childhood.
“Some” parents can make children feel that they have to merit their love, that it is a reward for good behavior.
Children, under these conditions, feel that they have to be perfect, match up to their parent’s norms before love is deserved.
I always thought that the true “worth” of a person was something to be proved; the unique value of each person is not acknowledged to be an intrinsic quality. In his book “The Road of Mankind”, Jewish philosopher Martin Buber says that “with each new person who is born into this world, there is something new that has never existed before, something totally new and unique… It is this unique and exceptional quality that each person is called to develop”. But; how can children feel that they are unique if they have to fit their parent’s norms ?
It is only when children are accepted as they are, with their unique gifts, and limits; when they are listened to and respected. It is then that they will be able to later on in life, learn how to appreciate and accept others. Love and respect, like fear and prejudice, are legacies passed on from one person to the next.
The movement from seeking approval to taking responsibility, to being open to those who are different, implies a shift of consciousness. It is as if a shell is broken and gradually; the real person is able to emerge. One major reason for our propensity to gang together in mutually exclusive groups is because most of us experience love only in the most imperfect way. When I discover that I am accepted and loved as a person, with my strengths and weaknesses; When I discover that I carry within myself a secret, the secret of my uniqueness, then I can begin to open up to others and respect their secret. It is then that the fear of others begins to dissolve; inclusion, friendship, a feeling of brotherhood/sisterhood begins to emerge. As we become more conscious of the uniqueness of others, we become aware of our common humanity.
We are all fundamentally the same, no matter what our age, gender, race, culture, religion, limits or disabilities may be.
We all have vulnerable hearts and need to be loved and appreciated. We have all been wounded in our hearts and have lost trust in what is deepest in us. We all want to be valued, and to be able to develop our capacities and grow to greater freedom. However; until we realize that we belong to a common humanity, that we need each other, we will continue to hide behind feelings of elitism and superiority and behind walls of prejudice, judgment, disdain, and all those negative traits that these feelings engender.
Each human being, however small or weak, has some-thing to bring to humanity. In our beautiful universe, there are stars, suns, solar systems, and galaxies astonishingly complex; but, in our earthly domain there exist a multitude of small life filled with animals and plant life that are important because of their beauty, their healing qualities, and their capacity to sustain life. Every part of the human body is important and has a role to play in our overall well-being. In the same way, each and every person big or small has a role to play in this world.
As we start to really get to know others, as we begin to listen to each other’s stories, things begin to change. We no longer judge each other according to group identity, but according to those personal heart-to-heart encounters. We begin the movement from exclusion to inclusion, from fear to trust, from closedness to openness, from judgement and prejudice, to forgiveness and understanding. It is a movement of the human heart. We begin to see each other as brothers and sisters in humanity.
We are no longer governed by fear, but the heart.
Part One
What is the origin of terrible fears that so hinder us in making our heart’s desire; a better world to live in ? I believe that the origins of fear, of dissidence, and of the different, and of loss, as well as the fear of the ugly and the dirty; are to be found in the fears that many of us experience in childhood.
“Some” parents can make children feel that they have to merit their love, that it is a reward for good behavior.
Children, under these conditions, feel that they have to be perfect, match up to their parent’s norms before love is deserved.
I always thought that the true “worth” of a person was something to be proved; the unique value of each person is not acknowledged to be an intrinsic quality. In his book “The Road of Mankind”, Jewish philosopher Martin Buber says that “with each new person who is born into this world, there is something new that has never existed before, something totally new and unique… It is this unique and exceptional quality that each person is called to develop”. But; how can children feel that they are unique if they have to fit their parent’s norms ?
It is only when children are accepted as they are, with their unique gifts, and limits; when they are listened to and respected. It is then that they will be able to later on in life, learn how to appreciate and accept others. Love and respect, like fear and prejudice, are legacies passed on from one person to the next.
The movement from seeking approval to taking responsibility, to being open to those who are different, implies a shift of consciousness. It is as if a shell is broken and gradually; the real person is able to emerge. One major reason for our propensity to gang together in mutually exclusive groups is because most of us experience love only in the most imperfect way. When I discover that I am accepted and loved as a person, with my strengths and weaknesses; When I discover that I carry within myself a secret, the secret of my uniqueness, then I can begin to open up to others and respect their secret. It is then that the fear of others begins to dissolve; inclusion, friendship, a feeling of brotherhood/sisterhood begins to emerge. As we become more conscious of the uniqueness of others, we become aware of our common humanity.
We are all fundamentally the same, no matter what our age, gender, race, culture, religion, limits or disabilities may be.
We all have vulnerable hearts and need to be loved and appreciated. We have all been wounded in our hearts and have lost trust in what is deepest in us. We all want to be valued, and to be able to develop our capacities and grow to greater freedom. However; until we realize that we belong to a common humanity, that we need each other, we will continue to hide behind feelings of elitism and superiority and behind walls of prejudice, judgment, disdain, and all those negative traits that these feelings engender.
Each human being, however small or weak, has some-thing to bring to humanity. In our beautiful universe, there are stars, suns, solar systems, and galaxies astonishingly complex; but, in our earthly domain there exist a multitude of small life filled with animals and plant life that are important because of their beauty, their healing qualities, and their capacity to sustain life. Every part of the human body is important and has a role to play in our overall well-being. In the same way, each and every person big or small has a role to play in this world.
As we start to really get to know others, as we begin to listen to each other’s stories, things begin to change. We no longer judge each other according to group identity, but according to those personal heart-to-heart encounters. We begin the movement from exclusion to inclusion, from fear to trust, from closedness to openness, from judgement and prejudice, to forgiveness and understanding. It is a movement of the human heart. We begin to see each other as brothers and sisters in humanity.
We are no longer governed by fear, but the heart.
C
centurionguard
Guest
THE ORIGINS OF FEARS IN SOCIETY
Part Two
How do we all move from exclusion to inclusion ? When I talk about “inclusion” of people, whether they are those with physical and mental disabilities, beggars on the street, female and male rape victims or people suffering with Aids, Multiple Sclerosis, Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis-(ALS)-Lou Gehrig’s Disease, Parkinson’s, and a vast array of terminal diseases.
I am not talking only about starting up special schools or residences or creating good soup kitchens or new hospitals, and special health-care facilities. These are of course, necessary.
I am not just saying that we should be kind to such people because they are human beings. Nor is it a question of “normalizing” them in order that they can be like people who are better off…participating in church services, going to the movies, or enjoying the local swimming pool.
When I speak of inclusion of those who are “marginalized”, I am affirming that they have a gift to give to all, to each of us as individuals, to the larger forms of human organization, and to society in general. The excluded, I believe, live certain values that we all need to discover and live ourselves before we can become truly human. It is not just a question of performing good deeds for those who are excluded, but of being open and vulnerable to them in order to receive the life that they can offer; it is to become their friends. If we start to include the disadvantaged in our lives and enter into heart-felt relationships with them, those who are marginalized in society will change things in us.
They will call us to be people of mutual trust, to take time to listen and be with each other. They will call us out from our individualism and need for power, into belonging to each other and being open to others. If society as a whole were to truly embrace those who are marginalized; it would breakdown the prejudices and protective walls that gave rise to exclusion in the first place, affecting our human organizations, revealing new ways of being and walking together. So the one-way street, where those on the top tell those at the bottom what to do, what to think, and how to be, becomes a two-way street, where we listen to what they, the “outsiders”, the “strangers”, have to say, and we accept what they have to give,
That is a simpler and more profound understanding of what it means to be truly human.
If we start to see people at the bottom as friends, as people with gifts to bring to others, then the social pyramid, with the powerful, the knowledgeable, and the wealthy on top, becomes a place of belonging where each person finds their place of belonging where we live in mutual trust.
Our society shuns weakness and glorifies strength. By embracing weakness however; we learn new ways of living and discover greater compassion, trust, and understanding. This spirit of inclusion has extraordinary implications for the way we all live our lives and build our communities. Is this a Utopian vision ? If it is lived at the grassroots level in families, communities, and in other places of belonging, this vision can gradually permeate our societies and humanize them. I am not suggesting for a moment that each one of us must welcome into our homes all those who are marginalized. I am suggesting that if each one of us with our gifts and weaknesses, our capacities and our needs, opens our heart to a few people who are different or suffering and become their friends, and receive life from them, our societies would change. This truly then is the way of the human heart.
Part Two
How do we all move from exclusion to inclusion ? When I talk about “inclusion” of people, whether they are those with physical and mental disabilities, beggars on the street, female and male rape victims or people suffering with Aids, Multiple Sclerosis, Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis-(ALS)-Lou Gehrig’s Disease, Parkinson’s, and a vast array of terminal diseases.
I am not talking only about starting up special schools or residences or creating good soup kitchens or new hospitals, and special health-care facilities. These are of course, necessary.
I am not just saying that we should be kind to such people because they are human beings. Nor is it a question of “normalizing” them in order that they can be like people who are better off…participating in church services, going to the movies, or enjoying the local swimming pool.
When I speak of inclusion of those who are “marginalized”, I am affirming that they have a gift to give to all, to each of us as individuals, to the larger forms of human organization, and to society in general. The excluded, I believe, live certain values that we all need to discover and live ourselves before we can become truly human. It is not just a question of performing good deeds for those who are excluded, but of being open and vulnerable to them in order to receive the life that they can offer; it is to become their friends. If we start to include the disadvantaged in our lives and enter into heart-felt relationships with them, those who are marginalized in society will change things in us.
They will call us to be people of mutual trust, to take time to listen and be with each other. They will call us out from our individualism and need for power, into belonging to each other and being open to others. If society as a whole were to truly embrace those who are marginalized; it would breakdown the prejudices and protective walls that gave rise to exclusion in the first place, affecting our human organizations, revealing new ways of being and walking together. So the one-way street, where those on the top tell those at the bottom what to do, what to think, and how to be, becomes a two-way street, where we listen to what they, the “outsiders”, the “strangers”, have to say, and we accept what they have to give,
That is a simpler and more profound understanding of what it means to be truly human.
If we start to see people at the bottom as friends, as people with gifts to bring to others, then the social pyramid, with the powerful, the knowledgeable, and the wealthy on top, becomes a place of belonging where each person finds their place of belonging where we live in mutual trust.
Our society shuns weakness and glorifies strength. By embracing weakness however; we learn new ways of living and discover greater compassion, trust, and understanding. This spirit of inclusion has extraordinary implications for the way we all live our lives and build our communities. Is this a Utopian vision ? If it is lived at the grassroots level in families, communities, and in other places of belonging, this vision can gradually permeate our societies and humanize them. I am not suggesting for a moment that each one of us must welcome into our homes all those who are marginalized. I am suggesting that if each one of us with our gifts and weaknesses, our capacities and our needs, opens our heart to a few people who are different or suffering and become their friends, and receive life from them, our societies would change. This truly then is the way of the human heart.
A
Ana
Guest
Hi Chris! Your posts are very thought provoking. I have family obligations this weekend, but I am trying to squeeze some time in to respond. But FIRST I need time to digest everything you’ve written. 
C
centurionguard
Guest
In 1979 Archbishop David Bohr published one of the best Catholic books to date entitled “Catholic Moral Tradition”. An excellent reference to theological studies, this book synthesizes the best theological reflection on Christian Moral Life with the Magisterium and what the Catholic Church believes. I often use this book for reference to some of the Catholic Churches most challenging questions particularly on the subject of Sexual Ethics and Bioethics. On page 300; (“On The Treatment of Rape Victims”): Understanding, compassion, respect, and concern are the most basic needs that innocent rape victims have most need of. Regrettably; these are often denied in a society that still tends to look at all rape victims with suspicion, judging them as being guilty, or even as having “asked for it”. Rape Victims also have (“serious spiritual needs”), psychological, and legal needs. The hospital chaplain’s office, pastoral care department, (“must”) have developed special approaches that mesh with the emergency room procedures. Sensitization programs such as S.A.N.E. may be especially helpful for “all members” of the emergency staff and the networking of hospitals with other caring programs such as rape crisis centers (“demographically where available, usually in major cities”) The increasing trend that many Catholic hospitals have tended to avoid treatment of rape victims because of the confusion over methods of preventing pregnancy. However; it is widely acknowledged, furthermore that the chances of conception after rape are statistically quite low.
The only critique I have about this article is that it does not expound on the spiritual needs of rape victims. Presently within the Catholic Church there is “NO” official ministry within the Church that supports the need for one on one spiritual counselling for all rape victims who are in desperate need. It is not my intention to be sarcastic but where does the Church draw the line and leave her footsteps of compassion behind inside hospitals and church exits? Is it enough that the clergy washes it proverbial hands and leaves rape victims within the Church to the whimsical approaches of modern secular psychotherapy which has nothing to do with spiritual formation? Regrettably that is the bleak picture that I myself have experienced within the Church as a heterosexual male rape victim gang-raped and tortured at gunpoint. Even after writing and sending numerous emails to priest’s and the Knights of Columbus I get NO REPLIES. Perhaps my only option that I have yet to do is to confront my archbishop personally. Or would be better off remaining silent.
The only critique I have about this article is that it does not expound on the spiritual needs of rape victims. Presently within the Catholic Church there is “NO” official ministry within the Church that supports the need for one on one spiritual counselling for all rape victims who are in desperate need. It is not my intention to be sarcastic but where does the Church draw the line and leave her footsteps of compassion behind inside hospitals and church exits? Is it enough that the clergy washes it proverbial hands and leaves rape victims within the Church to the whimsical approaches of modern secular psychotherapy which has nothing to do with spiritual formation? Regrettably that is the bleak picture that I myself have experienced within the Church as a heterosexual male rape victim gang-raped and tortured at gunpoint. Even after writing and sending numerous emails to priest’s and the Knights of Columbus I get NO REPLIES. Perhaps my only option that I have yet to do is to confront my archbishop personally. Or would be better off remaining silent.
C
centurionguard
Guest
**It’s been some ten months since I last made a post in this thread. In that time frame I have had (“one”) meeting with my parish priest. He was sympathetic about my horrid past. In the end he said he would set up a meeting to speak to a special woman who happens to be a Nursing Supervisor at our city hospital, but also heads the Social Justice Ministry in our Parish. Strangely but not totally surprising for me no meeting was ever arranged after several emails. So I guess I’m let up in the air. What the hell…suck it up as usual.
This still hasn’t changed my adamant position that the Catholic Church still Lacks Genuine Help for Victims of Rape.
However; if there is any consolation I feel myself getting closer to Jesus who suffered and died (“FOR ME”) on the Cross. Perhaps this is my final closure to accept what happen to me similar to Job. Perhaps there is some paradoxical logic in this. Easier said than done sure. I just feel guilt sometimes in my weakness when I find it difficult carrying my Cross. And sometimes that makes the stigma of my painful gang-rape past worse. But I do try to carry my Cross.**
This still hasn’t changed my adamant position that the Catholic Church still Lacks Genuine Help for Victims of Rape.
However; if there is any consolation I feel myself getting closer to Jesus who suffered and died (“FOR ME”) on the Cross. Perhaps this is my final closure to accept what happen to me similar to Job. Perhaps there is some paradoxical logic in this. Easier said than done sure. I just feel guilt sometimes in my weakness when I find it difficult carrying my Cross. And sometimes that makes the stigma of my painful gang-rape past worse. But I do try to carry my Cross.**
R
Rence
Guest
I would go see the priest and ask him for the Nursing Supervisor’s name and contact information so that you can set up a time to meet with her yourself.
I’m so sorry that you haven’t been able to find the help you need within the CC. I think you’ve been searching for a long time and it’s shameful.
C
centurionguard
Guest
**]I would go see the priest and ask him for the Nursing Supervisor’s name and contact information so that you can set up a time to meet with her yourself.
**
I already know this woman’s name. I worked along side of her for years when she formerly lead the Children’s Catechetical Program for the parish for years.
I’m not really sure why she has chosen to avoid me. And it’s quite possible, giving her the benefit of the doubt she has forgotten even though I have sent numerous emails. My last meeting with my parish priest was in early October. It was the first time I ever spoke to any priest about my horrid past. As I mentioned before he did have a sympathetic ear. Perhaps he was shocked, I don’t know. But in the end of our short meeting he really couldn’t give any advice at all from the Catholic Church’s Prospective.
I certainly don’t want sound off as being cold or indifferent but is sympathy all any rape victim can expect from the Catholic Church? You can find that from a secular shrink any day. Bottom line is that no rape victim is looking for sympathy.
It would seem that the position of secular shrinks and the Catholic Church is virtually the same concerning victims of rape. Psycho-therapy teaches (“Radical Acceptance”) while the Catholic Church teaches (“Joining ones sufferings to the Cross of Christ”)
I will choose the later through faith and humility. But really the cold reality is that we must all suck-up our pain and sufferings. My apologies if I sound depressed in all this. There are better days ahead.
- Status