Catholic dating protestant or Catholic

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I’m married to a non-Catholic. It hasn’t been as controversial as many people make it sound but it’s not unreasonable to only date Catholics.

To be fair where I am there aren’t a lot of practicing Catholics my age so if we didn’t marry non-Catholics there would be a potential children shortage.
 
Discerningcatholic said:
You wouldn’t even date a non Catholic?
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Do you want to marry a Protestant? I just don’t see the purpose of dating a Protestant if you’re not wanting a mixed religion marriage, which I think would be confusing for future children.
 
There seems to be a lot of opinion here without any discernment.

You never know why God has put this in front of you.

Protestants aren’t the evil one. They have the building and the furniture; the house is just not decorated yet.
They have the faith, they have the love for our Lord but they just have yet to realize the fullness of the faith.
To be deep in History is to cease being protestant - John Henry Newman

I am married to a Protestant and we have been married for almost fourteen years. I am a practicing cradle Catholic. Over the past few years He has been attending our Church regularly and we never shy away from discussing our Faith. (Know your Bible inside and out though, as all Catholics are called to do. Many Protestant arguments are based on excerpts not the entirety)

Our youngest is 8 oldest 11. Our boys are being raised completely in the Faith and have both received all of the Sacraments and are continuing in Catholic Religious Education through Confirmation and Youth Ministry. Next year my oldest is training to be an altar server.

Don’t be so quick to be worried.

Love one another as I have Loved you - It can’t hurt a thing to see what God may have in store. You never know how the Holy Spirit may work through you to bring another to the fullness of Faith. Then again, you may know in a first date that he’s totally wrong for you. Trust in Our Lord and let the Holy Ghost Guide You.
 
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Discerningcatholic said:
A friend is setting me up on a blind date with a protestant & I’ve been taking to someone on catholicmatch. I don’t know if I should accept the blind date or not.
Does anyone have any thoughts on what I should d
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It’s just a date, not a marriage proposal. Why not accept? There’s absolutely nothing wrong with it.
 
Agreed. People overestimate the importance of a date. You’re not making a commitment longer than a single evening. Relax.
 
What’s the worst thing that can happen if you go on this blind date? You’ll meet someone you might like to have as a friend. You don’t have to marry her.

You haven’t yet met the Catholic girl you’ve been talking to online. So you aren’t being disloyal to her.

Besides, dating helps one define the things they are looking for in a future mate.
 
This is an excellent post. The only thing I’d add is this: if a marriage with a non-catholic ends in divorce, the difficulty of raising children in the Catholic faith becomes monumental. There is a situation like this in my extended family, with the young children now having one parent who is a strong Catholic and the other parent who is a lapsed Protestant with a revolving door of live-in sexual partners. As it’s been said, it takes two to make a marriage work, and only one to destroy it. If you’re a strong Catholic, do your best to only date strong Catholics with a view to life-long marriage.
 
You guys are getting waaaay ahead of yourselves with the marriage talk in my opinion. You’re putting the cart light years before the horse. Maybe he goes out with this girl and they realize within five minutes they can’t stand each other. Maybe they realize they don’t have romantic chemistry but they get along great as friends. Maybe they date for a little while and things end. Who knows?

Yes, the primary purpose of dating is to discern marriage. But it’s also about young people getting comfortable with the opposite sex and figuring themselves out. I’d never tell an eighteen year old they couldn’t go to the prom with some
boy or girl they’re into just because the odds of them marrying that person are near zero. It’s not just about “find a wife/husband.” It’s about personal development and socialization and meeting new people and all that good stuff. Then when they do meet that person who is marriage material they actually have the social maturity and experience to not be painfully awkward or uncertain of how to proceed.
 
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BoomBoomMancini said:
I’d never tell an eighteen year old they couldn’t go to the prom with some boy or girl they’re into just because the odds of them marrying that person are near zero.
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The OP is not asking about a teenager going on a prom date, on which I agree with you.

The OP seems to be an adult, already on “Catholic Match”. This points to more serious dating with an eye to marriage. So, I think that the marriage talk IS relevant to this OP’s question.
 
Both the studies and my own personal observations tell us that the chances of the children of a mixed marriage staying in the Church (Latest is from Pew Forum, less than 30% of children in a mixed Catholic/Protestant home are Catholics as adults)


IF we believe the Catholic Church is the fullness of truth, we would want our kids to be Catholic. By choosing to have those children with a non-Catholic, we should at least consider these.

I know, in real life, exactly 2 mixed marriages where the children have continued to practice Catholicism.
 
I’m assuming OP is rather young, just by virtue of the fact that a person who is more seasoned with dating has probably encountered the idea of going out with a non-Catholic a long time ago.
 
In my experience it seems that both mixed marriages and Catholic marriages are producing children more likely to stop practicing than not. Kids don’t seem to want to follow their parents. They prefer their peers.

I also wouldn’t have a clue where to actually meet potential Catholic mates after university. The Catholic community isn’t what it used to be.
 
Marriage to a devout Catholic doesn’t mean that person won’t subsequently convert to Protestant - I’ve seen it happen more than a few times.

Find a best friend you will choose to love independently of their Christian denomination.
 
Discerningcatholic said:
I am worried about dating multiple people yes, but more so my concern is would I even try with someone who’s a protestant if I have someone chance with someone catholic?
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Don’t put the cart before the horse.
A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush–but you haven’t either one, yet.
Don’t count your chickens before they hatch.
A penny saved is a penny earned.

How many dates have you been on with the Catholic? How many dates have you been on with the Protestant (that’s a rhetorical question since the blind-date hasn’t happened yet).

There are SO MANY steps between now and “dating” that you ought not lose sight of the forest for the trees.
 
Be interesting to see the stats of two practicing catholics. I don’t think it would be much higher.

Op for what it is worth I have been very happily married to a protestant for 16 years. He attends mass with us each week and is supportive of my bringing them up in the faith. I have Catholic friends marry a fellow catholic and end up in miserable marriages, which is incredibly damaging to the kids. Much better to be with someone you are compatiable with, rather than only focus on their religious beliefs.

If they happen to be catholic even better.
 
I am sure that Pew Study has information if one wants to dig into it.

The surprising thing we have learned this century is that the most important thing to a child’s faith is the faith of their father.

The often quoted study " “The demographic characteristics of the linguistic and religious groups in Switzerland” by Werner Haug and Phillipe Warner of the Federal Statistical Office, Neuchatel. It appears in Volume 2 of Population Studies No. 31, The Demographic Characteristics of National Minorities in Certain European States , edited by Werner Haug and others, published by the Council of Europe Directorate General III, Social Cohesion, Strasbourg, January 2000."

is summarized in many, many articles.
  • When a mother and father attend church regularly:
    • 33% of their children will end up attending church regularly
    • 25% of their children will end up not attending at all
  • When a mother attends church regularly, but the father does not attend church at all:
    • 2% of their children will end up attending church regularly
    • 60% of their children will end up not attending at all
  • When a father attends church regularly, but the mother does not attend church at all:
    • 44% of their children will end up attending church regularly
    • 34% of their children will end up not attending at all
Furthermore, the study found:
  • If the mother is the first to become a Christian in a household, there is a 17% probability that everyone in the household will follow.
  • If the father is the first to become a Christian in a household, there is a 93% probability that everyone in the household will follow.
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The Faith of Our Fathers

This week we recognize the irreplaceable role of fatherhood, a vocation to which all men are called. Pope Francis reminds us: “It is a term dearer than any other to us Christians because it is the…
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