Cell Phone Address Book

[Mt19_26]

While reading another thread in this forum, “A Hubby’s Phone”, I thought of another related issue. I was going post in that thread but I think a new thread would be more appropriate.

What does everyone here think about opposite sex phone numbers in their spouse’s cell phone address book? Personally, I didn’t think there was a problem with it. But after having gone through infidelity in my marriage I changed my position. I don’t think it’s appropriate anymore. I see no reason why my wife should have another man’s cell phone or home phone number in her addess book. Even if she says he’s “just a friend”. I’ve been burnt by that “just a friend” phrase already and I blame myself for being so naive to actually believe the person she was unfaithful with was “just a friend”.

My wife still has other men’s phone numbers in her cell phone address book and she refer’s to some of them as “just friends”. I have voiced my dislike for having those numbers in there but haven’t gone as far as asking her to remove them. I know that she’ll very likely get upset and start accusing me of not trusting her.

 

[movingmom]

Personally I don’t have any male friends besides spouses of my female friends. I really don’t think it’s appropriate to be buddies with the opposite sex, unless of course my husband is part of the relationship. This does exclude work friends, who of course you may have their home phone numbers in case of work emergencies - even so, I would be VERY suspect of my husband if he had a woman’s phone number in his adress book who was not a friend of mine and who was not a work associate. Call me old fashioned, but why would he need a bunch of female friends?

 

[Princess_Abby]

Mt19:26:

While reading another thread in this forum, “A Hubby’s Phone”, I thought of another related issue. I was going post in that thread but I think a new thread would be more appropriate.

What does everyone here think about opposite sex phone numbers in their spouse’s cell phone address book? Personally, I didn’t think there was a problem with it. But after having gone through infidelity in my marriage I changed my position. I don’t think it’s appropriate anymore. I see no reason why my wife should have another man’s cell phone or home phone number in her addess book. Even if she says he’s “just a friend”. I’ve been burnt by that “just a friend” phrase already and I blame myself for being so naive to actually believe the person she was unfaithful with was “just a friend”.

My wife still has other men’s phone numbers in her cell phone address book and she refer’s to some of them as “just friends”. I have voiced my dislike for having those numbers in there but haven’t gone as far as asking her to remove them. I know that she’ll very likely get upset and start accusing me of not trusting her.

That’s kind of a blanket statement, though.

What if it’s work-related?

I also have numbers of my girldfriends’ boyfriends or husbands in my cell phone book, because I am friends with them too and on many occasions I’ve needed to call them for planning reasons or whatever else, and vice versa.

My husband and I have priest friends, too. If I call them, it’s to invite them over for dinner or to return a call. They often tell my husband and I how nice it is to have friends…people around their own age who treat them very normally and whom like to have fun with them. I think it’s tiring for them to be on a pedastal all the time. I email with several priest friends as well.

A couple of my brother’s marine friends (he’s in Iraq, and so are they) call me to talk sometimes. One doesn’t have any siblings, doesn’t have a girlfriend, his mother is dead and his father isn’t up for much listening. The other boy (these guys are 23 and 24…I am 25, but they all remind me of my brother and are his age) just lost his brother in service and talking to his family is very overwhelming to him right now. He has a girlfriend but he’s thinking of converting to Catholicism and she isn’t very happy about that, so they are rarely on speaking terms. My husband talks to them, too. Since my husband and I are close to my brother, we have known them for two years and both were at our wedding when they came back from bootcamp with my brother.

I speak to my husband’s friends on the phone, too. We just moved away from many of them and they’re fun and funny. My husband will pass me the phone and sometimes they call my cell if they don’t know where my husband is. Other times, we’ve coordinated surprises for my husband.

I have a good friend I’ve had since childhood that is also a good friend of my husband’s, now, too, and who is a male. He’s in medical school and has always been very brotherly. He and my husband are now very close too. I am good friends with our friend’s girlfriend, too.

Anyway, I guess it depends on the circle of friends you and your spouse cultivate and the amount of openness about opposite friends. My friends are my husbands’ friends, and vice versa. I also talk right in front of my husband most of the time, and so does he.

 

[Mt19_26]

Princess_Abby:

That’s kind of a blanket statement, though.

What if it’s work-related?

I don’t give out my personal cell phone number to my co-workers unless it’s absolutely needed. And even then I tell them I am not guaranteed to answer it. Most of my co-workers don’t give out their numbers either. I do understand that some professions like the medical field may require cell phone access between co-workers but mine doesn’t so I don’t give it out. My employers policy is that personal cell numbers are private and should remain private.

Princess_Abby:

I also have numbers of my girldfriends’ boyfriends or husbands in my cell phone book, because I am friends with them too and on many occasions I’ve needed to call them for planning reasons or whatever else, and vice versa.

I don’t and neither does my wife. I am friends with my friends wives also but I don’t think it’s appropriate to be calling them, and my friends don’t think it’s appropriate for me to be calling their wives either, and as a result don’t need their numbers in my cell phone. I certainly would not want me wife call her friends husbands.

Princess_Abby:

My husband and I have priest friends, too. If I call them, it’s to invite them over for dinner or to return a call. They often tell my husband and I how nice it is to have friends…people around their own age who treat them very normally and whom like to have fun with them. I think it’s tiring for them to be on a pedastal all the time. I email with several priest friends as well.

My wife has the number of a few priests that we know in her address book. I see no problem with that. Calling a priest is different than a friends spouse.

Princess_Abby:

A couple of my brother’s marine friends (he’s in Iraq, and so are they) call me to talk sometimes. One doesn’t have any siblings, doesn’t have a girlfriend, his mother is dead and his father isn’t up for much listening. The other boy (these guys are 23 and 24…I am 25, but they all remind me of my brother and are his age) just lost his brother in service and talking to his family is very overwhelming to him right now. He has a girlfriend but he’s thinking of converting to Catholicism and she isn’t very happy about that, so they are rarely on speaking terms. My husband talks to them, too. Since my husband and I are close to my brother, we have known them for two years and both were at our wedding when they came back from bootcamp with my brother.

I would not allow any of my friends or my brother’s friends tp call my wife to talk. I think it’s inappropriate for someone of the opposite sex to get too friendly with a person’s spouse.

Princess_Abby:

I speak to my husband’s friends on the phone, too. We just moved away from many of them and they’re fun and funny. My husband will pass me the phone and sometimes they call my cell if they don’t know where my husband is. Other times, we’ve coordinated surprises for my husband.

If my friends call my wife they might talk to them for a short time, like “how are you?” or “how are things going?”, etc. Same goes for me. That’s fine but neither of us will call them to talk one-on-one. And because of that there is no need to have them in our cell phone address book which goes back to the original subject of this thread.

Princess_Abby:

I have a good friend I’ve had since childhood that is also a good friend of my husband’s, now, too, and who is a male. He’s in medical school and has always been very brotherly. He and my husband are now very close too. I am good friends with our friend’s girlfriend, too.

I was okay with this also until that “childhood” friend and my wife got close and she became unfaithful. So, I guess, naturally I don’t really agree with this being okay anymore. I was warned that it was wrong to have close friends of the opposite-sex before and ignored it. Now I now what everyone was trying to tell me. A person’s bestfiend is their spouse. There is no need for close friends of the opposite-sex.

Princess_Abby:

Anyway, I guess it depends on the circle of friends you and your spouse cultivate and the amount of openness about opposite friends. My friends are my husbands’ friends, and vice versa. I also talk right in front of my husband most of the time, and so does he.

Yep, I guess some people are more comfortable than others. I would say old fashioned also as another poster here said.

 

[GodBlessJoanie]

My feeling is that if there was a behavior that was making my beloved spouse “uncomfortable” then he wouldn’t have to ask me more than ONCE to stop.

Of course, let’s understand that this is something reasonable and not a control issue <<for example: “I get uncomfortable when you leave the house without me…”>>

I think you are correct. I’m not married but if I’m ever blessed with a Sacramental marriage the delete button will be used extensively as it is inappropriate for me to continue ‘single men’ friendships.

Blessings,
Joanie

 

[Princess_Abby]

Mt19:26:

I don’t give out my personal cell phone number to my co-workers unless it’s absolutely needed. And even then I tell them I am not guaranteed to answer it. Most of my co-workers don’t give out their numbers either. I do understand that some professions like the medical field may require cell phone access between co-workers but mine doesn’t so I don’t give it out. My employers policy is that personal cell numbers are private and should remain private.
**
*When I worked, I was on call and it was a necessity. My husband’s direct supervisor for the consulting he does (not his full time employment) is a woman (easily 15-20 years older than him, married with two kids and a lovely person). ***

I don’t and neither does my wife. I am friends with my friends wives also but I don’t think it’s appropriate to be calling them, and my friends don’t think it’s appropriate for me to be calling their wives either, and as a result don’t need their numbers in my cell phone. I certainly would not want me wife call her friends husbands.

***It’s not appropriate to call and see if they’ll be coming to a BBQ at your house? ***

My wife has the number of a few priests that we know in her address book. I see no problem with that. Calling a priest is different than a friends spouse.

---

Uh, well glad that’s at least considered innocent.***

I would not allow any of my friends or my brother’s friends tp call my wife to talk. I think it’s inappropriate for someone of the opposite sex to get too friendly with a person’s spouse.

My husband and I consider it a compassionate response to boys who are dealing with the worst possible war reality: preparing dead comrades’ bodies for shipment to the US, as well as the search, recovery and identification of them. The boys call my mom, too. We send them cookies and my husband talks to them of normal things, like football and college games, etc., things that help them feel connected to life in the States. Given my background, I’m glad I can lend a listening ear to boys in distress who don’t have a support system otherwise. There is nothing inappropriate about helping someone cope during a monumental lifetime sacrifice. My husband and I pray with these boys on the phone. Sorry it’s not quite so sordid as you apparently imagined.

If my friends call my wife they might talk to them for a short time, like “how are you?” or “how are things going?”, etc. Same goes for me. That’s fine but neither of us will call them to talk one-on-one. And because of that there is no need to have them in our cell phone address book which goes back to the original subject of this thread.

We don’t call to talk one-on-one. My husband and I often pick up each other’s cell phones, in which case a conversation develops. Or my husband’s friends will ask to speak to me and see if they can beg off a bin of homemade cookies or courteously ask if I mind them coming over for dinner. On occasion, those that are unmarried will call and ask for insight into one of their various relationships. In most cases, I happen to be friends with their girlfriends.

I was okay with this also until that “childhood” friend and my wife got close and she became unfaithful. So, I guess, naturally I don’t really agree with this being okay anymore. I was warned that it was wrong to have close friends of the opposite-sex before and ignored it. Now I now what everyone was trying to tell me. A person’s bestfiend is their spouse. There is no need for close friends of the opposite-sex.
*
** Well, my childhood friend lives in Texas now, and we haven’t lived in the same state since I was 16, so… However, he does come to visit and my husband has even flown to TX a couple times to hang out with him, as they are very close now.*** Aside from that, I’m not a cheater and I adore my husband. I did not call my childhood friend my “best” friend. That is reserved for my spouse only.

Yep, I guess some people are more comfortable than others. I would say old fashioned also as another poster here said.
**
*Actually, you come off as being a little rude and judgemental about other people’s choices. You are welcome to your own opinions, but just because your wife strayed does not mean other people’s marriages have holes in them. ***

 

[urbana]

Basically, this reduces to the question of whether men and women can be just friends, or whether interaction with the opposite sex should be restricted to your spouse.

While sometimes such friendships can be a bad idea and go to far, many times such friendships can be healthy, and sometimes such friendships are not only acceptable, but necessary. Some individuals are more comfortable talking with individuals of one sex than the other. Some of that can be related simply to the differences between the sexes. Other times, it can be related to extremely negative experiences with one gender or the other. Sometimes, this means that an individual cannot make the type of close friendships that everybody needs except with the opposite sex.

An example of one that was necessary: I (an unmarried male) have a very close female friend. At this point, she is married, though during most of our friendship, she was either engaged or dating her husband. I suppose you could say that I am friends with her husband, although he is really more of an acquaintance. She has never really confided anything in me, as she has her husband for that. On the other hand, I have revealed many things about myself to her that I had confided to nobody else, and since then only to my spiritual director once I got one. If I had a wife, it would be inappropriate for me to be relying on my friend instead of my wife, but I am still single. Nor is family an option, nor did I have a spiritual director, nor were male friends an option (they might be now, but at the time I needed somebody to talk to, they were not.). I consider her to be my sister, and she regards me as her brother. I know of nothing inappropriate about our relationship, nor has my spiritual director ever said anything critical of it. I respect the sanctity of her marriage almost as much as she does (and she is ridiculously attached to her husband, to the point of having a difficult time being apart for more than a day). While she is quite beautiful (I think? Who ever has an ugly sister?), I am not the least bit attracted to her, and our relationship is no danger to her marriage. This is despite the fact that there were times I thought I might end up calling her sometime at 3 am, and we both knew that if I did, she would take my call and likely not repeat what I said to her husband. She had my permission to reveal anything and everything to her husband, but she also knew how much that wedding gift of mine had cost me, and would never have revealed any more than necessary to allay any concerns he might have. I’m fairly sure she knew that the ONLY reason I gave her that permission is because I love my sister and would never want to put her in the difficult position of having to break her promise to me because of her greater promise to her husband. If she had ever been forced to that, I’m sure it would have been a simple, but painful choice for her to make, and I couldn’t put her in that position.

Would this relationship have been wise if I were married? No, because I should then have confided in my wife. Will I abandon my relationship with my “sister” if I get married? No, although I would then confide in my wife, not in my sister. However, just because you have a spouse does not mean that you should abandon all your friends and family. Was it wrong for my sister to allow me to open up to her? More likely, it was a virtue, a spiritual work of mercy. Would I terminate continuing interaction with her if I thought I was endangering her marriage? Absolutely!

Should men and women be friends? If that friendship takes away from the relationship with a spouse, no. However, if the relationship does not interfere in any fashion with any spousal relationships, nor does it violate any laws of morality, I have no objection.

 

[Princess_Abby]

I think the whole point is that if married, would you be willing to have your spouse right there with you, watching and listening?

For me, the answer is yes and nearly all of the time he IS right there watching and listening and participating. I don’t think priest friends, work supervisors, lifelong friends at a great distance, occasional conversations concerning plans or events with friends’ significant others or my husbands’ friends is cause for alarm or judgement.

If there was ever a time where he or I felt uncomfortable about something, then we would talk about it and I know we would do anything to keep the other happy and secure.

Fortunately we have buckets of trust between us and it has never been damaged. As the poster before me said, I too am very attached to my husband and can’t even sleep unless I’m touching his hand or arm or belly or shoulder. He is my best friend and I am his; therefore we are not threatened by any of our mutual friends of either sex. Our relationship is very special and exclusive.

 

[La_Chiara]

Princess_Abby:

***Actually, you come off as being a little rude and judgemental about other people’s choices. You are welcome to your own opinions, but just because your wife strayed does not mean other people’s marriages have holes in them. ***

Does this really add to the discussion? And who is calling whom “rude and judgemental”? Some compassion, rather than criticism and condescension, would seem to be in order for this man whose wife was unfaithful to him and their marriage.

 

[Catholic2003]

I think each couple needs to work this out for themselves. My wife has plenty of male friends as well as plenty of female friends. It is purely platonic, and I don’t have a problem with her talking with them, or even going to dinner with them.

When we got married, there were one or two of her male friends that she stopped seeing, because she felt that they thought of the relationship as possibly more than platonic. It was her decision and her judgment; I never met them.

Now, if it turns out that my trust in my wife is mistaken, and she commits infidelity, then (assuming I forgive her) this will change drastically. But until then, I’m going to start out trusting her completely.

 

[Joe_Kelley]

Well if my wife ever checks my address book she is going to find a lot of women she doesn’t know - I have the whole parish sick list, three dozen ministers to the sick, the parish staff, and a couple of classes of RCIA and Adult Confirmation.

On the other hand she doesn’t know how to get into my computer; so I am safe.

 

[Mt19_26]

Princess_Abby:

When I worked, I was on call and it was a necessity. My husband’s direct supervisor for the consulting he does (not his full time employment) is a woman…**

You overlooked what I said. I said it was sometimes necessary depending on your profession. My wife was in the medical field and she did have her supervisor’s (a male doctor) number in her cell phone book which was not an issue. My issue would be her having her male co-worker’s numbers in her address book that she would practically never have to call or have a need to call.
**

Princess_Abby:

***It’s not appropriate to call and see if they’ll be coming to a BBQ at your house?

---

That is not what I am talking about. Sure it’s fine to call them to check to see if they are coming over. What I am talking about is calling them to talk to THEM personally. To hold a conversation with them as a friend. I do not go calling my friend’s wifes to “just talk”. Also, if they are coming over to watch the game on Sunday or for some other gathering I call my friend. Not my friend’s wife.

Princess_Abby:

Uh, well glad that’s at least considered innocent.
**

Of course it is.

Princess_Abby:

My husband and I consider it a compassionate response to boys who are dealing with the worst possible war reality: preparing dead comrades’ bodies …[snip, to reduce message size]… My husband and I pray with these boys on the phone. Sorry it’s not quite so sordid as you apparently imagined.
**

Nothing wrong with talking with those boys. I think I see the problem here. You’ve taken my original subject and stretched it to cover every possible aspect of opposite-sex contact ranging from priests all the way to soldiers overseas. My post was dealing with male friend’s in a spouse’s cell phone address book, whereas, male friends are defined as friends from high school, college, work, etc. Friends I do not believe a spouse should be close enough to to have in their cell phone book. I view a cell phone address book to be a list of people that one communicates with on a regular basis and I don’t feel there should be any opposite-sex friends that close.

Princess_Abby:

***We don’t call to talk one-on-one. My husband and I often pick up each other’s cell phones, in which case a conversation develops. Or my husband’s friends will ask to speak to me and see if they can beg off a bin of homemade cookies or courteously ask if I mind them coming over for dinner.

---

My original post was about cell phone numbers in a spouses address book. I think you have drifted off of the subject somewhat. I pick up my wife’s cell phone sometimes and it’s one of her friends and we talk briefly before I hand the phone over to my wife. What I don’t agree with is if I answer my wife’s cell phone and it’s another man. No man (aside from the obvious exceptions) should be calling my wife to talk.

Princess_Abby:

On occasion, those that are unmarried will call and ask for insight into one of their various relationships. In most cases, I happen to be friends with their girlfriends.
**

This is a whole other subject all together. When talking with someone about relationships, especially people you know, many issues are private. No one has the right to reveal one’s personal issues to another without their consent. If you look in the Catechism you’ll see what I am talking about. For example, If my sister calls me and tells me she is having problems in her marriage I would tell to let me know what is wrong without getting into the private details of their marriage. Unless her husband has said it’s alright to talk to me about it. Posting here about personal issues is fine because it’s all done anonymously. But disclosing another person’s private issues to a mutual friend or acquantance is sinful.

Princess_Abby:

Well, my childhood friend lives in Texas now…
**

Distance doesn’t make a difference. My wife’s friend live clear across the United States and it didn’t stop her.

Also, I did not call you a cheater nor did I say your childhood friend was your best friend.

Princess_Abby:

** *Actually, you come off as being a little rude and judgemental about other people’s choices. You are welcome to your own opinions, but just because your wife strayed does not mean other people’s marriages have holes in them. ***

I don’t see what I said that would make me appear rude. Is it because I don’t agree with you? I never said you or anyone’s marriages had holes it them. You’ve taken my posts and twisted them all around to make them appear that I am saying things I never said.

 

[auppie]

Mt19:26:

I would not allow any of my friends or my brother’s friends tp call my wife to talk. I think it’s inappropriate for someone of the opposite sex to get too friendly with a person’s spouse.

*You would not “allow”??? Is not your marriage a partnership? Does one partner make all the rules? *

A person’s bestfiend is their spouse.

Ideally this is true, however, reality dictates this isn’t always the case. One spouse may be too judgmental or doesn’t listen to what the spouse is actually saying. Just because two people are married, it doesn’t automatically mean that they are “best friends”.

There is no need for close friends of the opposite-sex.

See above, there could be need for close friends of the opposite sex…one spouse may need the perspective of the other from a person of the opposite sex.

 

[kage_ar]

In the CCC, I read of no distinction is made between married and unmarried people having friendships:

---

**“2347 ****The virtue of chastity blossoms in friendship. It shows the disciple how to follow and imitate him who has chosen us as his friends, who has given himself totally to us and allows us to participate in his divine estate. Chastity is a promise of immortality. **

Chastity is expressed notably in friendship with one’s neighbor. Whether it develops between persons of the same or opposite sex, friendship represents a great good for all. It leads to spiritual communion.”

Both my husband and I treasure our friends, opposite and same sex, married and single. Our friends make our lives much richer! We also work as a team, and help the other out – for example, a dear friend from my childhood is in the process of conversion. She is a night owl, while I have to get my ZZZZssss. My DH is also quite the nightowl. Many times she has called at midnight with a burning question re Catholicism, DH would ask her what was up, and she would discuss the burning question with him – thank GOD he could help her at exactly the time she needed it!

Anyway, my DH and I are friends, first and foremost. We have never had a jealousy thing – and now 40+ I pray we never do!

 

[Princess_Abby]

Mt19:26:

This is a whole other subject all together. When talking with someone about relationships, especially people you know, many issues are private. No one has the right to reveal one’s personal issues to another without their consent. If you look in the Catechism you’ll see what I am talking about. For example, If my sister calls me and tells me she is having problems in her marriage I would tell to let me know what is wrong without getting into the private details of their marriage. Unless her husband has said it’s alright to talk to me about it. Posting here about personal issues is fine because it’s all done anonymously. But disclosing another person’s private issues to a mutual friend or acquantance is sinful.

Given that this is in response to what I said, which was referring to unmarried friends calling to ask for advice and insight into their relationships with girlfriends…you are way off base.

I think we should agree to disagree, since despite the blanket statements you’ve made, my clarifications make little difference to you. As much as you think I’m supposedly twisting things, I see that from you instead.

Do what works for you and I will do the same.

 

[auppie]

Princess_Abby:

Given that this is in response to what I said, which was referring to unmarried friends calling to ask for advice and insight into their relationships with girlfriends…you are way off base.

I think we should agree to disagree, since despite the blanket statements you’ve made, my clarifications make little difference to you. As much as you think I’m supposedly twisting things, I see that from you instead.

Do what works for you and I will do the same.

You are not the only one who sees who is twisting things. The OP seems to have some controlling issues. While I don’t condone what his wife did, I can see why she did it. Sad, sad situation. I certinaly will pray for him.

 

[Mt19_26]

You would not "allow"??? Is not your marriage a partnership? Does one partner make all the rules?

No, I would not allow it. Just like I would not allow my wife to go out on a date with another man -or- become close to another man. Yes, it’s a partnership, but that does not mean that faithfulness in a relationship should be given a backseat. Maybe “allow” is too strong of a word. Maybe “like” should have been used. I would not like it. And if a spouse does something they their spouse dislikes they are being unfaithful to their spouse.

auppie:

Ideally this is true, however, reality dictates this isn’t always the case. One spouse may be too judgmental or doesn’t listen to what the spouse is actually saying. Just because two people are married, it doesn’t automatically mean that they are “best friends”.

And it doesn’t mean you can find another “best friend” of the opposite sex. Also, if you run to a friend, same sex or not, and expose the private details of your marriage you are being unfaithful to your spouse.

auppie:

See above, there could be need for close friends of the opposite sex…one spouse may need the perspective of the other from a person of the opposite sex.

Sorry, I strongly disagree. A spouse’s close friend of the opposite sex should be their spouse. They should not need run to an opposite sex friend for their perspective.

 

[Mt19_26]

****Both my husband and I treasure our friends, opposite and same sex, married and single. Our friends make our lives much richer!

There is a difference between a friend and a close-friend. My wife has many male friends. I have female friends. But neither of us have close-friends of the opposite-sex that we confide in. I am not against friends of the opposite-sex in general…I meant **close **friends.

 

[Mt19_26]

auppie:

You are not the only one who sees who is twisting things. The OP seems to have some controlling issues. While I don’t condone what his wife did, I can see why she did it. Sad, sad situation. I certinaly will pray for him.

What have I twisted?

You have no idea why my wife did it. You don’t know her. You don’t know her past. You seem to be able to gauge everything about me and the reason my wife was unfaithful through a few posts. That’s a very poor why to judge a situation.

And how am I controlling? Am I controlling because I don’t believe in close opposite-sex friends?

What I think is sad is the acceptance I see her of spouses in a marriage allowing close opposite-sex friendships.

 

[kage_ar]

Mt19:26:

There is a difference between a friend and a close-friend. My wife has many male friends. I have female friends. But neither of us have close-friends of the opposite-sex that we confide in. I am not against friends of the opposite-sex in general…I meant close friends.

In the spirit of full disclosure, both my husband and I have close friends of the opposite sex. Friends we would take a bullet for, friends we would trust to raise our child if something happened to us. Close, chaste friendships…

Again, it is about each couple and the level of trust that works in that family.