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wltdsnymom65
Guest
Hello Everyone…
I find myself coming to these boards, reading your posts and responses, on a daily basis. You all seem to bring so much perspective and love to everyone’s situations, requests, and questions.
My son, 14 years old, was assaulted by another student at school. He was bitten on the back of the neck, broke the skin and drew blood. The other boy is an 18 year old Senior.
He was given a warning, signed a contract that said he would never do it again, and sent back to class. It was dismissed as “horseplay”.
Several hours later, my son was taken out of his classroom by two local police officers and escorted to the Assistant Principals office where he spent an hour being interrogated about a suspicious “drug bag” being passed around school. When asked questions he answered. He was told he was not suspected of having the “drugs”, but he was seen walking down the hallway with one of the students that was. He was subjected to a pat down, had his book bag searched and then sent back to class.
I was never notified of this, as per school policy. I was told it was an oversight. The school’s own Police Liasion Officer was also never made aware of the biting or drug incident. The “drug bag” they were tipped off about was a snack size baggie that contained raisins.
I’m struggling with the fact that I feel this is all to “coincidental” happening on the same day. to a kid that has never been in trouble before, not even littering! After meeting with all the Principals involved and the School’s Principal, the stories keep changing and they all seem to be tripping over themselves to avoid trouble for each other.
The school I can deal with, but my struggle is with the young man who bit my son. After much wrangling we were finally able to speak with his parents. This young man has been through the Foster system, and recently a victim of assault a few months back. He is 18, and has what his mom described as immaturity and mental incapacity. If we press charges, he will have to go through the adult court system, and she fears if he is arrested he may commit suicide.
I’ve spoken with his mom, and my heart breaks every time I talk to her, I’ve been trying to put myself in her shoes and have not slept in almost 3 days. I am agonizing over this.
On the one hand, this boy is “mentally challenged”, in counseling, and a victim at some time in his life. We hear about so many “bullied” kids lashing out at others. I think to myself, was this one of those times? If I do nothing, could this happen again to someone else? Was it a one time incident? I don’t want what happened to my son to happen to anyone else, or maybe worse. But because of “privacy” laws, no one can give me any information. Again it was dismissed as horseplay, but my son was walking away from the group heading in the other direction when this young man came from behind and bit him. I believe it warrants a consequence, but am not sure if “jail” is the answer.
I’m so filled with emotions, that I can’t hear GOD speaking to me. I was wondering if any of you kind friends out there can offer any advice. My rosary beads are getting overtime.
Forgiveness has been given, but do you let it drop and hope it doesn’t happen again, or do you move forward and possibly cause more harm to a young man who is already fragile?
My son has been tested because of the bite and seems to have been forgotten in all of this as everyone is scrambling to save themselves and protect this other young man. My son’s health and safety are my top priority.
Thank you for any advice/guidance/prayers you can offer.
Blessings
I find myself coming to these boards, reading your posts and responses, on a daily basis. You all seem to bring so much perspective and love to everyone’s situations, requests, and questions.
My son, 14 years old, was assaulted by another student at school. He was bitten on the back of the neck, broke the skin and drew blood. The other boy is an 18 year old Senior.
He was given a warning, signed a contract that said he would never do it again, and sent back to class. It was dismissed as “horseplay”.
Several hours later, my son was taken out of his classroom by two local police officers and escorted to the Assistant Principals office where he spent an hour being interrogated about a suspicious “drug bag” being passed around school. When asked questions he answered. He was told he was not suspected of having the “drugs”, but he was seen walking down the hallway with one of the students that was. He was subjected to a pat down, had his book bag searched and then sent back to class.
I was never notified of this, as per school policy. I was told it was an oversight. The school’s own Police Liasion Officer was also never made aware of the biting or drug incident. The “drug bag” they were tipped off about was a snack size baggie that contained raisins.
I’m struggling with the fact that I feel this is all to “coincidental” happening on the same day. to a kid that has never been in trouble before, not even littering! After meeting with all the Principals involved and the School’s Principal, the stories keep changing and they all seem to be tripping over themselves to avoid trouble for each other.
The school I can deal with, but my struggle is with the young man who bit my son. After much wrangling we were finally able to speak with his parents. This young man has been through the Foster system, and recently a victim of assault a few months back. He is 18, and has what his mom described as immaturity and mental incapacity. If we press charges, he will have to go through the adult court system, and she fears if he is arrested he may commit suicide.
I’ve spoken with his mom, and my heart breaks every time I talk to her, I’ve been trying to put myself in her shoes and have not slept in almost 3 days. I am agonizing over this.
On the one hand, this boy is “mentally challenged”, in counseling, and a victim at some time in his life. We hear about so many “bullied” kids lashing out at others. I think to myself, was this one of those times? If I do nothing, could this happen again to someone else? Was it a one time incident? I don’t want what happened to my son to happen to anyone else, or maybe worse. But because of “privacy” laws, no one can give me any information. Again it was dismissed as horseplay, but my son was walking away from the group heading in the other direction when this young man came from behind and bit him. I believe it warrants a consequence, but am not sure if “jail” is the answer.
I’m so filled with emotions, that I can’t hear GOD speaking to me. I was wondering if any of you kind friends out there can offer any advice. My rosary beads are getting overtime.
Forgiveness has been given, but do you let it drop and hope it doesn’t happen again, or do you move forward and possibly cause more harm to a young man who is already fragile?
My son has been tested because of the bite and seems to have been forgotten in all of this as everyone is scrambling to save themselves and protect this other young man. My son’s health and safety are my top priority.
Thank you for any advice/guidance/prayers you can offer.
Blessings
